Lishia tightened her grip on her bag, suppressing the urge to scream and cry and throw a hissy fit. What was wrong with Riley? Oh, yeah, besides being spoiled and manipulative and used to getting her own way—other than that she was just great. Who could ask for a better friend?
“Look,” Riley said in a gentle tone. “Just go with it, Lishia. Can’t you see it’s for the best . . . for everyone? Even if you tried to tell on me, you know I would deny it. And then I would tell what I know about you.”
“What do you know?”
“Just that you went after Gillian first. You provoked her for no reason. Remember when you told her she stunk? There were other girls in the bathroom that night. Amanda would back me. So would Vanessa. We could make it look like you planned this whole thing—right from the get-go. And why not? You had everything to gain. And you know that Coach Glassman’s sympathy is already with Gillian.”
Lishia was too stunned to respond. Her so-called best friend was threatening blackmail.
“Don’t be mad, Lishia. It’s just the way it is.” Riley patted her on the shoulder. “Like I said, in the end it’s the best—for everyone. Even Gillian. I heard that Coach Glassman is encouraging her to get some counseling help and alcohol treatment.”
“Right . . .” Lishia gritted her teeth as she reached for the door handle.
“You just need to cool off,” Riley told her. “Then we need a plan for helping you to get that uniform. Call me tonight and let’s brainstorm some kind of fundraiser idea. Okay?” She had switched over to her nice, sweet, little girl voice. “We’re still friends, aren’t we?”
Lishia shrugged. “See ya.” She got out of the car, slammed the door, then took several deep breaths as she walked up to the house. She needed to get a grip on her anger before Mom asked her how her day went. She didn’t want to explode and let all this out, didn’t want Mom to know the truth. But she had to come up with a way out of this—and being without the funds to order her uniform and things seemed the perfect escape.
“Hello?” Mom called from the kitchen. “Is that you, Lishia?”
“Hey,” Lishia answered. “I’m going to my room now.”
“Not yet!” Mom called back urgently. “I have a surprise for you first!”
Lishia braced herself, trying to paste a happy expression on her face for whatever it was that Mom had, probably a cupcake left over from one of her students’ birthday parties. “What is it?” Lishia asked glumly as she came in the kitchen.
“Ta-da!” Mom waved her arms to display a huge arrangement of white and purple items spread all over the kitchen countertops.
Lishia’s eyes grew wide as she realized what she was looking at. “What?”
“Everything you need for cheerleading.” Mom beamed proudly at her. “Can you believe it?”
“Huh?”
“They were Gillian’s.” Mom was actually dancing around the kitchen now. “Isn’t it wonderful?”
Lishia spirits plummeted even deeper. “Gillian’s?”
“Yes. I made a fantastic deal with her mom. She was actually glad to get rid of the stuff. She’s so disappointed with Gillian.”
“Gillian was willing to sell this stuff to me?” Lishia picked up a pom-pom and gave it a pathetic shake.
“Gillian didn’t have a choice in the matter. Cindy Rodowski told me that her daughter only earned a small part of the money, and Cindy had to pay for the rest. At the time she didn’t mind because she thought it was what Gillian needed, you know, to help her get her life on track. But then when it all unraveled, well, let’s just say Cindy wasn’t too happy. In fact, she said it was like a slap in the face, like Gillian didn’t appreciate Cindy’s sacrifices.”
“Oh . . .” Lishia set the pom-pom back down and sighed.
“I thought you’d be thrilled.” Mom smiled victoriously. “I know Cindy was hugely relieved to be rid of it—and even make some money. She actually ran home during lunch and loaded it all up in her car. They’ve been under a lot of financial pressure, and even though she only charged me a fraction of what this stuff is worth, she seemed genuinely happy to get the money. You can pay me back for part of it, and we’ll call the rest your birthday present.” Mom picked up a pom-pom and shook it. “Rah! Rah! Rah!”
“I, uh, I don’t know what to say.” Lishia really had no words—no words she wanted her mom to hear, anyway.
“How about, Thanks, Mom—you’re the greatest?” Mom grinned. “Or maybe you can do a cheer for me.”
“Thanks, Mom, you really are the greatest.” Lishia forced a happy face. “Can you take a rain check on the cheer? I’ve got a bunch of homework.”
“Sure.” Mom gathered up an armload of stuff. “You get the rest of this and we’ll pack it all to your room.”
As Lishia gathered an armload of clothes, she smelled something unpleasant. “Oh, that’s right, I almost forgot something.”
“Forgot what?”
“Gillian has really strong BO.”
Mom chuckled, then took a sniff. “Oh . . . yeah, I see what you mean.”
“Do you think we can wash it all first?”
“Sure. Let’s drop the clothes in the laundry room. I’ll get to it later.” She held up a pair of shoes. “And do you know that Gillian’s feet are only a half size larger than yours? I thought maybe an extra pair of socks and you’d be okay. Some of these shoes are barely worn, honey.”
Lishia couldn’t bear to imagine how Gillian must be feeling. She dumped the clothes into an empty laundry basket. “I sure hope that smell comes out,” she said to Mom.
“I’ll use some special detergent,” Mom assured her. “We’ll get rid of it.”
“Thanks.” Lishia gave her a genuine smile. “You’re one in a million, Mom.”
“Glad you appreciate me. And I know you won’t let me down.” She ran her hand over Lishia’s head. “Not like Gillian did with her mom.”
Lishia turned away so Mom couldn’t see her eyes. Once again, she felt on the verge of frustrated tears. She felt like she was digging herself deeper and deeper into a hole—a big black hole with no way out.
For the rest of the week, Lishia played the part of the happy, perky cheerleader as well as the dutiful best friend, always saying and doing the right things—whatever it took to keep Riley content. It was easier that way. Riley never seemed to guess Lishia was acting, and by Friday, thoroughly exhausted, Lishia was thankful the week was finally ending.
“I told Dayton that you and Todd would go to the movies with us tonight,” Riley informed Lishia as she dropped her off.
“But I—”
“No buts, Lishia.” Riley cut her off. “This is the last Friday for a while without a ball game. We need to make the most of it.”
“Why didn’t Todd ask me himself?”
“He had to get to basketball practice.”
Lishia knew Todd was on varsity, so that was probably true. They were trying to get ready for next week’s first game.
“Dayton said around seven, okay?”
“Okay . . .” Lishia got out of the car and faked a cheerful wave. “See ya!”
Riley zipped off, and Lishia stood there shaking her head. It was as if she had become Riley’s slave friend. Lishia would probably never get to have her own opinions, make her own choices . . . it was an awfully high price to pay for a “best” friend. But there seemed no way out. As Lishia went in the house, she remembered how she used to complain about Janelle sometimes. Janelle had been stubborn and even a pain at times, but she was an angel compared to Riley. Being best friends with Riley was a nightmare. A never-ending nightmare.
ten
You seem different,” Todd told Lishia as he walked her to the door after their double date with Riley and Dayton.
“How so?” she asked absently.
“I don’t know.” He frowned. “But you’re not the same fun-loving girl you used to be.” He grinned. “Remember my birthday party and how we ran from the cops?”
“Shh
h . . .” She put a finger over her lips. “I don’t want my parents hearing that.”
“See.” He nodded. “You are different.”
“Maybe I’m just tired.”
He shrugged. “Yeah . . . maybe.”
“Thanks for the movie and everything,” she told him as she reached for the doorknob.
“Sure.” He stepped back and shook his head like he was disappointed.
“I’m sorry you think I’m different,” she told him.
“Hey, you can’t help what you are.” He gave a plastic-looking smile. “See ya around, Lish.” Then he turned and jogged back to the car. As she watched him go, she knew it was over. Her chance to be Todd’s girl had just blown up in her face. She knew it was her own stupid fault, but the truth was, she didn’t really care. It was as if it was all too much.
Trying to keep up the cheerleader happy face, trying to play Riley’s loyal best friend . . . it was all sucking the life out of her. She had no energy left to play Todd’s fun-loving girlfriend. And although part of her felt like crying, the larger part of her felt numb . . . and dead. She knew she had disconnected herself from God and that there was no point in taking her troubles to him. As a result, she felt more alone than ever.
“What happened between you and Todd?” Riley demanded on the phone the next day.
“Nothing.”
“But he said you guys broke up.”
“Then I guess we did.” Lishia flopped down on her bed and sighed.
“Why?”
“I don’t know why . . . it just wasn’t working.”
“But Todd’s a great guy—and he and Dayton are such good friends. I had plans for us to go to prom together and—”
“Prom? That’s, like, months away, Riley. I can’t even wrap my head around next week.”
“Speaking of next week, Amanda called and wants to have a practice at her house. She says we need to work on that halftime routine and I agree. I’ll pick you up at four thirty, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Is something wrong?”
“No.” Lishia tried to perk up her voice. “I was just sleepy.”
“See you at four thirty.”
Lishia agreed and closed her phone. She had really hoped to go to youth group tonight—she knew she needed it, maybe more than ever. But if practice lasted the usual couple of hours, she would be cutting it pretty close. Still, maybe it was possible. Lishia opened her phone and punched Megan Bernard’s number. Megan had been nagging Lishia all week—okay, maybe nagging was the wrong word—Megan had been encouraging Lishia to return to youth group. And yesterday Lishia had promised to try.
“Hey, Megan,” she said cheerfully. “You still want to give me a ride to youth group tonight?”
“Sure.” Megan sounded a little skeptical. “You really want to come?”
“I do. But I have cheerleading practice at Amanda’s house. Would you mind picking me up there?”
“This isn’t a trick, is it?”
“No, of course not. Practice will probably end around seven. I know that will make us a few minutes late. Do you mind?”
“No, that’s okay.”
Lishia told her the address. “And I’d really like to talk to you, Megan.”
“To me?”
“Well, I need to talk to someone . . . someone who’s a Christian, you know?”
“You can talk to me,” Megan said.
“It’s just that I’m feeling, well, kinda trapped.”
“Trapped? How?”
“It’s this whole cheerleader thing. I guess I kinda feel like I got on this crazy roller-coaster ride and I don’t know how to get off.”
“You want to quit being a cheerleader?” Megan sounded shocked.
“I don’t know . . . I’m not even sure. I guess I wonder how I can possibly be a cheerleader and a Christian. You know?”
“I guess I get that. But we are supposed to be lights in dark places. Maybe that’s what you’re doing. Besides, Amanda Jorgenson always claims to be a Christian, so it’s not like you’re alone.”
“I know, but it’s still hard. And being Riley’s friend isn’t easy either.” Lishia knew she was saying a lot . . . maybe too much.
“Well, Riley has always been kind of manipulative, if you know what I mean.”
“I guess . . .” Lishia stopped herself from saying how she really felt.
“I can understand how it might be hard being a Christian while you were Riley’s best friend. I mean, that girl could probably influence you in some pretty bad directions, especially if you weren’t careful.” Megan paused. “But I don’t want you to accuse me of gossiping again. I actually took what you said to heart. There’s a fine line between repeating gossip and stating the truth. Several of us girls had a long talk with Raymond about this.” Raymond was their youth pastor, and Lishia had always respected his opinions.
“What did he say?”
“He said one way to figure out if something is gossip or not was to ask yourself, ‘Would I say this if the person I’m talking about was listening?’”
“That’s good advice.”
“So here is what I’d say if Riley was—” She stopped suddenly. “She’s not listening, is she?”
“No, of course not.”
“Okay, I’ll have to trust you. I’d say Riley is probably a nice person, but she sometimes gives me the impression that she’s using people to get what she wants. I could be wrong, but I’ve known Riley since middle school, and she hurt me a few times then and a few times since. I’ve learned to keep my distance from girls like that.”
“Oh . . .”
“You have good friends in youth group,” Megan told her. “Janelle and—”
“Janelle dumped me, remember?”
“Janelle said she didn’t dump you. She said you got hurt because she wanted to include Chelsea as a friend and—”
“Janelle and Chelsea are best friends now. Or haven’t you noticed?”
“Well, I guess that’s true. But it’s only because you stepped out of the picture. And Chelsea is really nice. If you got to know her, I’m sure you’d like her.”
“What makes you so sure?” Lishia was feeling aggravated now.
“Well, if you can get along with someone like Riley, I should think Chelsea would be pretty refreshing. She’s a strong Christian, and she’s honest and kind and—”
“You know, I didn’t call you to hear you singing Chelsea’s praises, Megan. But thanks for—”
“Sorry, I’m just saying you have good friends at youth group. There’s me and Grayson and Chase and—”
“Thanks, Megan. I know you’re trying to help me, but maybe this is all a bad idea.” Lishia was pacing back and forth in her bedroom now.
“What’s a bad idea?” Megan sounded hurt.
“Me coming to youth group with you. Maybe I’m really not ready for that.” The truth was, Lishia was getting scared. She knew these kids well enough to know that they would see through her. They might even do something like offer to pray for her, and she could end up breaking down in tears and spilling the whole story. Then everyone would know!
“What did I say?” Megan asked helplessly. “I’m sorry if I stepped on your toes. You know me and my big mouth. Please, come to youth group with me, Lishia. You won’t be sorry.”
“I don’t think it’s a good idea. I mean, I do have practice, and sometimes we run late. I might end up making you so late that it wouldn’t even be worth going. No, tonight’s not a good night. Thanks, Megan. Maybe I can make it next week.”
“But Lishia!”
“No, I’ve made up my mind. I can’t do it tonight. But I’ll think about it for next week. Thanks, Megan. Later!” Lishia hung up and flopped back onto her bed. That was close! What had she been thinking? Of course, she couldn’t show up at youth group and expect that her friends could help her without her spilling all the beans in front of them. Seriously, had she lost her ever-loving mind?
Lishia felt like s
he was going to throw up on Friday afternoon. To kick off basketball season, the school had a big pep assembly. It would be her first time performing as a varsity cheerleader, and she knew she was going to either fall on her face or fall completely apart.
“I can’t do this,” she muttered from the bathroom stall where she was holed up.
“Yes, you can,” Riley hissed at her. “And you will!”
“Come on,” Vanessa urged. “It’s almost time to start.”
“I can’t,” Lishia sobbed. “I’m sick.”
“You are not sick,” Riley snapped. “You’re just a chicken.”
“I’m going out there now,” Vanessa said angrily. “I’ll see if I can get Amanda to stall a couple minutes, but if you’re not there in five minutes, we’re going on without you, Lishia. So get it together!”
“Come on,” Riley commanded. “You’re going to do this, Lishia, even if I have to drag you out myself.”
“I can’t.”
“Stop being such a baby and come on!”
Lishia tore off a long strip of toilet paper and loudly blew her nose. “I wish I were dead,” she mumbled.
“That could be arranged.”
“Thanks.”
“Look, Lishia, it’s just the jitters,” Riley’s voice turned patient. “Everyone gets them. You have to ignore them. You’ve done really great in practice. Everyone says you’re really good. And your jumps have gotten really spectacular. I’ve actually been a little jealous.”
“Really?” Lishia sniffed.
“Yes, so come on. Let’s just do this. You’ll get it over with and you’ll never feel like this again. I promise.”
Lishia unlocked the door, and Riley jerked it open. “Now, come on!” She grabbed Lishia’s arm and dragged her out. “Let’s run.”
Just as they entered the gym, the other cheerleaders from both varsity and JV ran out onto the floor with pom-poms in hand, getting into formation for the opening fight song routine that they were all supposed to perform together. Lishia and Riley ran out with them, and following everyone’s lead, Lishia pasted a confident smile onto her face and took her place, and suddenly the jazz band was blasting out the fight song.
The Best Friend Page 9
