Liza was as broken as I was. Finding your mother’s dead body and learning the man you thought was your father was the cause of her death would do that to someone. Add the fact that the man who raised you tried to kill you, it has a damaging effect.
I so desperately wanted to fix her. I just didn’t know how. I made a mistake once before and I was determined to do whatever it took not to let history repeat itself. Of course, Liza didn’t make it any easier for me, she seldom ever does. Unwilling to give me, to give us, a chance. I had to be patient. I had to work harder than I ever had before. I let love slip through my fingers once and I wasn’t about to let it happen again. I was relentless in my pursuit. It may have not been the prettiest one and I may have pushed a little too hard.
She wasn’t like other women. The confidence she boasted was merely a façade. I learned I couldn’t just take what I wanted. I couldn’t just force her to love me. No; I had to prove to her I deserved her love, it was okay to let someone in, and that I was different. I had to let her come to me. And I thank God every day that she did.
“Well, I think that’s enough for today.” The judge’s voice snaps me back from my thoughts “Court is now in recess and we will continue tomorrow with the closing arguments.”
We stand and wait as the judge leaves the courtroom.
Heidi giggles as she steps down from the stand in her orange jumpsuit and skips toward her seat.
Maybe she really is crazy after all. I look out of the corner of my eye and see Liza’s pale face. She looks like she’s going to be sick.
Heidi is escorted toward a side door by the court officer. “See you in the morning, sissy,” she sings out.
Liza stares absentmindedly in front of her and I don’t think she realizes today is over. I brush a strand of her dark hair out of her face and press my lips against her temple. “Hey,” I whisper, “let’s get out of here.”
I squeeze Liza tightly around her shoulder and kiss the top of her head. It’s been a long day; testimony after testimony from doctors. All of whom say Heidi was well aware of her actions. She didn’t dispute any of the facts. Planning out every single detail from the anonymous threatening emails, breaking into Liza’s apartment—twice—and holding us captive. Liza shudders every time that night is spoken about and remembering it makes me sick to my stomach. I just want to take her home and hold her in bed. But she’s made me promise that no matter what, we would witness every part of the trial. When the judge finally calls for recess, I want to shout from the top of the tallest building in Longport. We are so close to putting this nightmare behind us. For Liza’s sake, above all else, I can’t wait for this to be over.
We are the last to leave the courtroom, with Eli following closely behind us. We approach the front doors and I can see the media frenzy beginning to swarm. I wrap my arm around her waist and pull her close to me. “I’ve got you,” I whisper, and press a kiss against her temple. Eli takes position on the other side of Liza, and in this moment I couldn’t be more grateful to have him here with us.
The doors open and the shouting commences. Every which way reporters are spouting off a million different questions. Cameras are shoved in our faces and the flash blinds us. With Eli’s help, we force our way through the crowd. At the bottom of the concrete stairs I turn in the direction of our car. The mob follows us. I unlock the passenger side door and help Liza into the car. I shut the door behind her and turn to look at Eli.
“Thanks, man.” I clap his shoulder with my hand. He nods once before taking off.
I shove my way through the reporters and around the front of my car. I’m about to open the door to the driver’s side when something catches my eye across the street. There, among the crowd, is a ghost from my past.
“It can’t be…” I whisper. I shake my head and look again. I can’t believe my eyes. It can’t be possible. But I can see her as clear as day.
A light breeze picks up and her wavy blonde hair dances around her head. Even at a distance I can see her sky blue eyes. The ones I fell in love with all those years ago. She looks just as she did nearly eight years ago. My mind has to be playing with me. She can’t be here. She’s supposed to be dead.
But it’s her. It’s Lily. A reporter jumps in my line of sight. I shove him out of the way, and when I look again she’s gone.
I open the door and climb in.
Liza looks at me funny and reaches out for my hand. “Are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“Something like that,” I mumble. I shake my head, start the car, and head toward our house.
CHAPTER TWO
THE NEXT MORNING COMES quicker than expected. The media frenzy is in full force when we arrive at the courthouse. Eli is there to help me get Liza inside. We sit quietly, one of us on each side of Liza, her gripping both our hands.
The defense attorney is first up to give his closing argument. For once he comes through and delivers a powerful closing argument. Being there to experience everything, I might actually consider Heidi to be crazy. Thankfully, the evidence speaks for itself. On top of that, the prosecutor knows what she is doing and goes out with a bang.
It’s an open-and-shut case. All the evidence is there, including the first-hand admission of Heidi during the trial, but we still have to wait for the jury to decide. We are dismissed for the jury to go over all the evidence and testimony. As soon as the verdict is in, we’ll get a call and make our last trip to the courthouse. I cannot wait for this to be over. We are so close. Then we can be on our merry way to the next step of our life. The wedding.
I sense a bit of relief in Liza as we leave the courthouse, as if the load on her shoulders has lifted a bit. All I want to do is get her home and spend the rest of the day with her. My favorite part of the day. As soon as this is all over, I’ll be back in the office and missing these moments.
As I help Liza into the car, I remember what I saw yesterday. I close the door, scan the sidewalk across the street from over the top of my car, and hope to catch a glimpse of the person from the day before. A part of me is disappointed when I don’t see her again. I can’t help but feel like I imagined the entire thing. With a deep sigh, I round the car to the driver’s side, climb in, and make my way home.
***
I haven’t been able to sleep the last couple of days so I am already awake when the nightmare begins to consume Liza. My mind is busy with the trial and with the woman I saw the other day. As the nightmare begins its assault, I am not surprised. Liza thrashes around on the bed, kicking and flailing. I dodge her arm just in time to avoid getting hit in the face. The moonlight filters in through our bedroom window, and the tears on her face glisten. I lean over and gently pin her arms down before I whisper, “Wake up, my love. It’s only a dream.”
Liza doesn’t wake up, but she starts to relax. Every few seconds, her body tenses under my hands. Dr. Uria, her therapist, has told me it’s not wise to wake her up during a nightmare. Just to make sure she’s safe and let it run its course. But the doctor doesn’t realize it kills me to see the one I love suffer like this. I lightly shake her arm, press a kiss to her temple, and let my lips linger for a moment.
“Wake up,” I say louder than before.
Finally, after what feels like an eternity, Liza’s eyelids flutter open. I cup her face with my hands and lightly kiss her lips.
She wraps her arms around me and begins to cry.
“It was so horrible.” Her voice is hoarse.
I nod and continue to hold her. When you love someone, you will do anything for them. Even when you know you can’t do anything other than hold them while they cry, you do it, because there’s nothing else you’d rather be doing.
I push aside all the thoughts plaguing my mind, especially the ones of Lily. She is the past, no longer here, and I need to realize she is never coming back. Even if by some miracle she did, Liza is my here and now. She holds my heart. She is my forever.
“I didn’t mean to wake you,” Liza mutters again
st my chest.
I laugh softly and smile. “Don’t ever be sorry for waking me.”
I can’t bring myself to tell her I was already awake, or why. It will only lead to questions. Questions I’m not ready to answer, that I think I will never be ready to answer. Because if I do, I’ll have to tell her what a monster of a man I once was. I’ll have to tell her about the horrible things I have done in my past. She won’t want me after that, and I can’t lose her. I won’t lose her.
To lose her is to lose my heart. I already lost it once, I won’t lose it again. Liza is my life. My reason for breathing. Nothing can ever take that away from me. Not even my past. I won’t allow it.
I kiss the top of her head and pull her closer to me. She has stopped crying, and I listen to her steady breathing until I know she has fallen back to sleep. I hold her, treasure her, and there is no greater feeling. After a few minutes, I am finally able to drift off.
It feels like I just fell asleep when I wake up to the sound of my cell phone ringing. I rub my eyes with the back of my hands and roll over to look at the clock on the nightstand next to me. It’s just after eight; we haven’t slept this late in ages. Our days typically start around six in the morning, so it’s nice.
My phone stops ringing, and I contemplate waking up Liza. We aren’t due back in court until the jury comes up with a verdict, which I hope is sooner rather than later. I resolve to let Liza sleep longer and curl up against her backside in anticipation for more sleep as well.
My phone starts to ring with its annoying little chirp again.
“All right, all right, I’ll get up,” I grumble as I reach for the phone. “Hello…” I say, yawning.
“We’ve got a problem.”
My first thought is why the hell is Eli calling me instead of Liza, and my second is why is he calling me so early.
“Well…actually two.”
“Okay,” I say hesitantly. I climb out of the bed carefully so I don’t disturb Liza. I walk into the expansive closet and shut the door before I continue talking. “What’s up, man? I mean, why are you calling my phone?”
“The verdict is in,” he says in a casual tone. “We have to be there by ten.”
“That’s great news!” My voice is louder than I expect it to be. I take a deep breath to calm down. “What the hell kind of problem could there be?” There is no way Heidi can get off scot free.
“Yeah, I’m sure it’s in our favor. I just worry about Liza.” His voice is soft and almost dreamlike. Like a man in love. I want to beat him over the head with a chair.
I know he’s her best friend, and that he’s concerned about her, but he could at least make it sound like he isn’t in love with her. It makes me want to throttle him, and if I had the chance, I would. “And…the bad news?”
“They let Robert out on early release.” Robert is Liza’s father.
Oh shit.
All the air is sucked out of my lungs. I sit down on the ottoman in the middle of the closet. I rub my hand over my face and let out a shaky breath. The thought that Liza’s biological father is out of prison makes me cringe. Of all the things that could happen…why this?
I pause for a moment, unsure of what to say. The bastard is supposed to rot in jail for the next five years, not get out after less than one. He’d better not show his face anywhere near Liza. “What the fuck? How am I supposed to tell Liza about this?”
“Tell me what?” My head snaps up, and I see Liza. She’s wearing nothing but one of my shirts, and her unruly dark hair is a rumpled mess. She couldn’t look any more beautiful.
“I’ll talk to you later,” I say, and hang up before Eli has a chance to respond.
“Tell me what?” Liza persists.
“Hey, beautiful.” I flash her a smile and stand up, dropping the phone out of sight behind the ottoman. Reaching out, I pull her into my arms. I slide my hands down her back and cup her ass. I squeeze and kiss the top of her head at the same time. Smiling, I think how she fits perfectly in my arms despite our height difference. “Have I told you how painstakingly gorgeous you are?”
“You remind me every day.” She laughs lightly and snuggles in closer, but it’s only for a brief moment. She pulls out of my embrace and looks up at me. “Who was on the phone?”
I guess my plan to distract her isn’t going to work. “Eli.”
“Elias called you?” Surprise is etched into every surface of her face. “Why the hell would he call you?” Her voice has an accusatory tone.
“Uh…I, uh, I’m not sure how to tell you this.” I reach for her hand but she steps back and folds her arms across her chest. Her shoulders press hard against her ears. “The good news is the verdict is in. We have to be there before ten.”
She glares at me. “Get to the bad news.”
Nothing gets past this woman. I take a deep breath and rub the back of my neck. “They let Robert out on early release.”
Liza’s face pales. I am able to catch her before she falls. I shift my weight and lower the both of us to the floor. I cradle her head in my lap and brush the hair out of her face. I gently kiss her on the forehead, both of her cheeks, the corner of her mouth. I stop only once my lips press against hers.
She stirs as soon as our lips make contact.
“Hey there,” I say softly. “Don’t ever do that again.”
I remember the last time she did this, back at the cabin. I nearly lost my mind. I had no idea what to do. I still am not quite sure, but at least I’m not freaking out this time.
Liza offers me a weak smile and tries to sit up, but I shake my head.
I stand and scoop her up into my arms, carry her back into the bedroom, and lay her on the bed. I walk into the bathroom, grab the cup next to the sink, and fill it with cold water. When I return, Liza is sitting up. She takes the cup and swallows the water in one gulp. She turns her head to set the cup down on the nightstand, but not before I spot the fear in her eyes.
Just another thing to add to her plate.
“Hey.” I take her face into my hands.
Tears form in her eyes and she lets out a soft sob.
I pull her against me and hold her tight. “It’s going to be okay.”
“I hate this.” Liza says. “I hate being so weak. I hate being vulnerable and afraid. I hate crying like a baby.” She sighs. “I’m surprised you’re not sick of babying me yet.”
“I’ll baby you every day for the rest of my life if I have to.” I rub her back and smile. “You are not weak. You are the strongest, bravest person I have ever met. No one should have to go through as much as you have in your life. But remember, you’re not alone. You have me. I will always be here to catch you when you fall. I will always be here to pick up the pieces. I love you and I would take a big sobbing mess over a day without you in it every single time.”
Liza tightens her arms around me and I inhale her scent. She still smells like the lavender bath salt she soaked in last night. It’s her favorite. She pulls out of my arms, looks up at me, and smiles. “I don’t know what I would do without you.” She pushes her lips against mine, but the kiss isn’t long enough.
“Or Elias,” she adds.
My body tenses and she looks at me funny. I let out a deep breath and pull her against my chest again.
“He’s my best friend, Reid,” she whispers. “Don’t forget, it’s you that I love. It’s you that I’m marrying.”
My body relaxes. She’s constantly reminding me of the fact that Eli is just her best friend. That’s all he’s ever been, and I have to get over it because he isn’t going anywhere. I never fight her about it, but it doesn’t mean I have to like it…or him. Call me a selfish bastard, but I just don’t want them being friends. It has nothing to do with the fact that he is a man. If Liza wants to be friends with men, that’s fine by me. Hell, she’s friends with Marco, the man I hired to follow my brother, and it doesn’t bother me.
It’s the fact that I’m afraid. I’m afraid that Eli’s going to steal her away f
rom me. That one day she’ll l wake up and realize the love she has for her best friend is something much more, and then she’ll leave me. I just can’t risk losing her. And if I do, I’ll be damned if it’s to Eli’s smug face.
As if she can read my thoughts, Liza squeezes her hold around me, lifts her head, and places a kiss on my jaw. I am content with the idea of spending the rest of the day holding her like this. Just her and me. Where the outside can’t touch us. If it wasn’t for the company, I’d pack our essentials, buy an island, and move the two of us there. Our own little haven. Liza would never go for something like that, though. She’s spent long enough in her own version of seclusion and it wouldn’t be fair to subject her to that again. I’ll just have to settle for the cabin a few hours outside of town. The place where we first came together.
When Liza discovered her mother’s mutilated body on the floor of her parents’ bedroom, she walked away from everything she had known. She changed her name, left behind her friends—with the exception of Eli—gave up all her luxuries…everything. When she was going to school then started at the literary agency that was all she did. She never made new friends, other than the one: her assistant-cum-sister turned psychopath.
It’s been a hard and bumpy road getting back into the world, but everyone in Longport knows who she is now. There is no hiding.
“We should get ready,” I say.
After another squeeze, Liza lets go of me and walks toward the closet, swaying her hips seductively, and my dick hardens with excitement. She slips my shirt over her head, drops it onto the floor, and walks into the bathroom.
It’s all the motivation I need to get my feet moving.
CHAPTER THREE
VICTORY, SWEET VICTORY. It’s only the first of what I hope to be many, but it’s a start.
The jury wasted no time coming back with a verdict. Guilty of kidnapping and attempted murder, beyond a reasonable doubt. How could they not? If they had come back with a not guilty verdict, my faith in humanity would have crumbled. Heidi had confessed to doing what she’d done. There was evidence and testimony, Liza’s being the hardest to hear.
If I Say No (Say Something #2) Page 2
