Love Unfortunate
Page 3
"Stop. I don’t want your kindness or your pity."
Messy circles rouged her cheeks. "I thought we were better." She inhaled quickly. "I thought we were more like lovers."
"We’re not."
Her hand fell by her side. "Then what just happened?"
His eyes narrowed. "It was for you. Not for me. You know what I want. Until I get it, none of this means anything to me."
Anger overtook his aura. He carried Liana the short distance between tub and bed. Promptly occupying the room’s lone stool, Laurent set about finishing her absolutions in stony silence.
Eyes watchful, senses alert, Liana mimicked the undead with her stillness. She took great pains to appear remote, but beneath the meticulous surface she reveled in his attention, even if still hurt by his rejection. Weakness her downfall, Liana adored how Laurent courted her with gentleness, much like he did so long ago.
Primordial memories stalked by, ripping adoration apart.
Oh, Laurent. You made me feel like I was an angel. Pure, untouchable…safe.
Liana knew exactly where this was headed. However, knowing brought a different brand of desolation.
You should’ve left me on that riverbank. Better yet, you should’ve pushed me back in.
Laurent’s mood shifted from unforgiving spite to frantic normalcy. His graceful hands parted her soaked locks. He toweled each section patiently, all the while humming a melancholy tune. "Do you remember this song, little bird?"
"I do. It’s what you were singing that day." Emotion flushed her cheeks. "The day you found me half-dead by the river."
"I was so scared to touch you." His hands stilled in remembrance. "You were the most beautiful creature I ever saw."
That’s what I made you think.
"And I thought you were an angel come to take me to heaven."
"An angel? As ugly as I was?"
"You weren’t ugly! I never thought you were ugly!"
"Hmm…but I’m much prettier now, aren’t I, little bird?"
Laurent’s seductive purr pricked her skin. "You are." Their gazes caught, leaving Liana to tremble in perfect dread.
* * * *
She could hardly remember his face anymore.
His real one.
Gone were the silvery lines crossing his skin, remnants of a woodcutter’s life. Gone were the few pockmarks, proof of adolescence. Gone were the tiny wrinkles bracketing his mouth and eyes.
Laurent’s perfection sickened her. There was no flaw in his face or form.
Liana shifted, bringing the coverlet over her naked shoulder. His sleeping face haunted her, a false reminder of another.
* * * *
He leaned forward, abandoning the damp linen in favor of placing his hands on the bed. Laurent brushed his lips against her neck. "Don’t you like me this way better?"
"I liked you the way you were. You never had to change for me."
"Oh, but you know that’s not true." He kissed her scabbed wounds. "So that’s the dirtiest lie you’ve ever uttered."
Liana’s conscience recoiled. No matter her resolve, no matter her strength of will, Liana always unraveled. Her need to justify only equaled his need to torment. Anger warred with guilt, ensuring Liana’s personal demon Blame would find its insatiable appetite whetted.
"You’ll never forgive me, will you?"
Mirth lightened his eyes to frightening proportions. "You don’t want me to forgive you. If I did, I’d have to let you out." His low laughter elicited shivers. "And you don’t want that, do you?"
Liana bit her lip, gaze heavy with honest lust. "No. I don’t want you to ever let me go."
"Good girl." Laurent allowed his words to trail off as his tongue flicked across the small punctures. "Does this feel nice?"
She turned into his body. Shivers racked them both. "Very nice." Her strained voice elicited a throaty chuckle. Liana wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered, "Please do it again."
"Again?" Laurent nipped the underside of her chin. When Liana shuddered in pained delight, he blew softly in her ear. "Do you love it, little bird?"
"Oh, yes."
"Very good." He rested his smooth chin on her shoulder. "But if you want to play, we need to talk first."
"Talk? What about, my lord?"
Not again. Every single time it’s the same. It doesn’t change no matter what I do.
"I want to talk about lies." Laurent turned his head and smiled into her hair. "Let’s talk about how your last lie is filthier than the first one you told me."
"What lie, Laurent?"
He ignored her question with chilling precision. "You remember the first lie you ever told me."
* * * *
"Why are you running?"
Liana glanced at the awkward man-child sharply. Her melodic voice held the ferocity of a wolf. "Why do you ask?"
He ducked his head in apology. "I meant no disrespect, my lady. Forgive me."
She felt something hot slither about the bowels of her suspicion. It was guilt. Looking away from him, Liana murmured stiffly, "I’m your equal. There’s no need to give me an honorific."
"My equal?"
She heard the hope spring forth from his well of loneliness. "Yes."
"Then may I ask…"
His voice trailed off when she met his clouded gaze squarely.
Liana expected him to fall beneath his discomfort and cowardice. Instead he surprised her.
He cleared his throat and finished his query. "May I ask your name?"
"Liana." She raised her chin in perfect challenge. "My name is Liana and I mean nothing to no one and that’s why I ran away."
* * * *
Liana swayed towards him and whispered, "Laurent, I never foresaw it would come to this."
"Really? The thought never occurred in that selfish, careless mind of yours? No, don’t answer." Laurent brushed her hair back with poignant tenderness. "You’ll just lie to me again."
"Please don’t say that."
He yanked her head back. "I will say what I wish!"
"Forgive me."
Her submissiveness appeased Laurent’s volatile temper. He released his grip and began again. "You told me you were a runaway of no real consequence." Laurent paused for several moments, searching for the scent of drawn blood. "You remember telling me that lie, don’t you?"
Liana’s heart pounded with the sick rhythm of a condemned woman’s plea. "I lied because I had to."
"Hmm. Did you?"
"I didn’t know I was going to stay with you, Laurent. I never imagined I’d be here past one night. I didn’t tell you everything because I didn’t think you needed to know."
"Then once you stayed—why didn’t you say anything then?"
Liana felt her feet walk the same rutted path. Damnation loomed on their horizon but she couldn’t turn back. "Because I was afraid you’d reject me."
"So you were being selfish."
She wet lips gone dry. "Yes."
Laurent hauled her naked body onto his lap. Keeping one arm about her waist, he used his free hand to stroke her taut stomach. "You wanted to keep your human pet, is that it?"
"I didn’t see you as my pet."
"Liar." The word slid from his throat with serpentine grace. "You lie like a devil, little bird." Laurent flashed Liana a delightful smile. "You’ve already taken my heart and reason. Do you wish my soul as well?"
"I’m not lying. I just wanted to protect you."
"Protect me? Keeping quiet about that beast hot on your trail was protecting me?" Laurent’s claws pierced her flesh and five drops sprang up. "That wasn’t protection. It was a death sentence."
Tears salted the air, streaking her skin like the blood running down her thighs. "I know that now, Laurent."
"You should’ve known it then!" Before he could vent his rage, sanity lurked like a ghost behind Laurent’s inhuman stare. "Wait."
"What?"
"Ssh!" Laurent pushed her off his lap. "Did you hear that?"
Liana shook her head but he never saw it. Instead, his attention darted from one part of the shadowed room to the other. "I’ve asked this before, haven’t I?" Without waiting for an answer, Laurent leapt from the bed.
Liana’s lips were stiff, words pliant with deception. "I don’t understand. What do you mean?"
"I’ve said these words to you before. All of them." Laurent held out his thumb and forefinger in warning. "Ssh. Ssh! I hear things, things that shouldn’t be. The forest…it’s smaller."
"You’re mistaken, my lord. Nothing has changed. Come to bed. Perhaps you’re tired."
Laurent darted towards the tiny window and inhaled deeply. "The game…their packs aren’t as large. When did this happen?"
"It’s approaching winter, my lord. The herds have gone to ground."
"No, that’s not it." Concentration knit a deep furrow across his brow. "There’s less food, but more people. Why do I hear so many voices?"
"Voices?"
"Yes! People—thousands of them!" Laurent whirled about, intensity burning a hole through his crumbling awareness. "Why do I hear so many voices, Liana?"
"Harvest is upon us." Her calm reply belied the sickness ravaging her heart. Don’t do this. Not when I’ve worked so hard! "The fields are heavy with grain and the workers are many."
Laurent looked at her in bewilderment. "How do you know? You haven’t left this tower in over a fortnight."
Liana rubbed her palms across the sheets, sure her actions would communicate nervousness. "I can hear them when they leave the fields. They say this year’s bounty will surpass all others."
Suspicion hardened his ethereal beauty. "Did they see you?"
"No!"
Laurent nodded in arrogant satisfaction. "The men know you are forbidden. Seeing you would mean instant death—wait!" The haughty lord disappeared, leaving a frenetic creature in his place. Laurent ran over to Liana and whispered, "You heard it this time, didn’t you?"
"No. I didn’t hear anything, my lord." She bowed her head and waited for his madness to grow.
"You had to have." His dark brows formed a fierce scowl. "I just heard your voice. Mine too. But not us. Or maybe…how could you not have heard it?"
Liana watched the despair overshadow confusion. Her heart broke all over again. "Let us talk of something else, my lord. Please."
Laurent brushed aside her husky plea. "No. This doesn’t make any sense." He strode towards the door. "I’m going to see for myself."
"Come to me, Laurent. Now."
Her aristocratic demeanor made him obey instinctively. When Laurent realized his actions, resentment dripped from his false smile. "You like my loyalty, my faithfulness, don’t you?"
Liana nodded in affirmation, memorizing every word, every nuance of her beloved’s demeanor.
I can’t give up. I WON’T give up.
"You command and I obey. Just like a dog." Crawling over her, Laurent bent down and pressed his mouth against Liana’s newest wounds. His tongue lapped at the dried blood roughly.
She threw her head back and pushed her body against Laurent, wordlessly demanding his carnal consideration.
I won’t feel guilty for using his insecurity against him. I’ll do whatever I have to in order to break this cycle.
"I can still be your pet, little bird." Laurent sat up and removed the damp tunic. His smooth chest gleamed like a perfect pearl. "I can do, be, whatever you wish. Tell me what you want from me and I’ll obey."
He mocked her with servility. She knew it but fell anyway. "I just want you to love me like you did before."
"Impossible." He leaned forward to whisper against her ear, "Ask for something else."
Liana turned her head. Raw lips met his. "Then love me as you are now."
"Oh, you give up so easily!" Laurent shifted so he could nuzzle her cheek. "And that’s why I know you for a liar, little bird. You never really wanted the boy I was."
Hot tears slipped free. Liana didn’t know what hurt worse—his calculated accusations or rejection of her embrace. "That’s not true."
Laurent’s hand neatly pressed her mouth closed. Still keeping it in place, he drew back and stared Liana down.
"Don’t misunderstand me, little bird. You enjoyed dominating that pathetic boy, making him grateful for even tolerating his presence. You bullied him with your beauty, breaking his will while pretending to hold him in esteem."
Liana shook her head and moaned her denials.
"Well, he’s dead and I’m glad he’s dead."
"That’s not true!" His hand muffled her raw screams, but it couldn’t mute her anguish. "That boy is still you! He’s not dead!"
Laurent’s devastating temper broke free.
"Yes, he is! That ignorant, bastard woodsman died when you let him get slaughtered!"
"I swear to you—I didn’t know! I would’ve protected you if I knew!"
"Protected me? A pitiful little bird like you?" Maniacal grief possessed him. "Don’t insult me with your stupidity, Liana."
She winced at his contempt. "I would’ve done it, Laurent. I swear."
"Why did you make me think you loved me? Why do you pretend now?"
His tortured question shredded her heart into bloody pieces. "I’m not. I love you, Laurent."
"Did you pity me? Is that what it was? Is that why you agreed to be mine?" Laurent’s voice deepened to a menacing growl. "Don’t be timid, wife—tell me. I can take it."
Finally maddened with grief and persecution, Liana bit into his palm. Pink saliva dribbled down her chin a few seconds later. "I never pitied you!"
Laurent released her mouth only to dig his claws into either side of her. He seemed completely unaffected by her attack.
"Tell me something, little bird. Did it give you pleasure to mock me?"
"I wasn’t—"
"Did you laugh at the poor, dirty bastard for believing you actually saw past his birthright and position?"
"I never laughed at you—"
"Did you scorn my honesty, my ease at letting you into my heart?"
The accusations hammered in her aching conscience, relentless and brutal.
"I didn’t lie about that—"
"How long were you planning on staying until you were done using me? A month? A week? That night? How long, Liana?!"
"No! Believe what you will, but not that!" Emerald warred with silver. "I wanted to be with you forever!"
"Liar." Laurent hissed the word as if it was the most abominable curse he could summon.
How can I win against this hate?
Liana dropped her gaze, unable to bear seeing the putrid poison tainting his visage.
"Can’t deny it, can you?"
Behind the rage, Liana heard his plea for dissent. Unwilling to fail him, she swallowed once and let out a shuddering breath.
"Laurent, I may have lied to you about many things, but there’s one thing I never lied to you about." Braving the lash of his bile, she cupped her husband’s cheek with tender fingers. "I married you because I loved you. I’ve always loved you. Even now, I would give up everything to stay here with you, Laurent. Everything."
An inarticulate cry of rage exploded deep within Laurent’s throat.
"LIAR! BITCH! WHORE!"
"No!"
"YES!"
"Why won’t you believe me?" She beat her fists against the bed. "Why?"
Laurent lurched back. Bloody anguish stained his luminous gaze. "I don’t know why!" Carmine tears spilled onto his ashen cheeks. "Something inside my head screams when you say it. It disgusts me."
"Disgusts you?"
He saw her pain and dropped to the floor. Ugly sobs filled the dim room. "W-What’s wrong with m-me? Why d-do I care? W-Why does seeing your pain h-hurt?"
Liana watched her husband’s deterioration in horror. Knowing his torment was her sin made her want to die.
"You a l-liar, Liana. You lied to m-me and I… all I ever, EVER did was t-take care of you. Love you! My will, everything I w-was b
ecame yours."
She couldn’t stomach the wretched sight of seeing Laurent on his knees for her.
"And it still wasn’t enough!"
Liana turned away from him. Incoherent words spilled alongside her tears.
I brought this to him. Again!
"Don’t turn away from me!" Laurent scrambled onto the bed. He grabbed her naked shoulders and shook her once. "I ended up becoming this MONSTER because I love you so much!"
"I’m sorry! Please, please forgive me!"
"How can I forgive you when this is what you do to me? Tell me, Liana! How?"
"I don’t want to hurt you! That’s not what I want! I swear to all that is holy, Laurent, I’m trying to take away your pain! Every night I try and this is what we end up with!"
Her impassioned pleas only ignited his manic wrath. Laurent abandoned her bruised arms in favor of wrapping both hands around her neck.
"If I kill you now, will I finally find peace? Because I need it, little bird." A corpse smile ruined his beauty. "I need one night, just one, where I don’t feel this sickness inside."
Liana forced her body to ignore its instincts. She remained docile within his perilous hold. "Tell me what I can do, Laurent. Whatever it is, I’ll do willingly. Just tell me."
"Is your heart so dead that you can’t see it?"
"I want to understand. Please just tell me."
"You refuse me the truth!"
"What truth, Laurent? What is it you want me to say?"
Laurent’s mouth quivered. His hands loosened. "Who is he, little bird? Who is he to you?"
Black shock threatened to send her into oblivion. Liana’s heart faltered and panic dominated her gut. Their diseased routine had never encompassed those two questions.
Ever.
"He told me he knew you and he didn’t lie. I saw you with him. The night I became this." A tick took hold of his left cheek. "I saw you together. I heard your whispers of love. That’s when I came here and…took…power."
Liana wanted to sink through the stone floor. Of all the moments in her life she wished could disappear, the present horror vied for top honor.
"That’s why I keep you here. And that’s why each night it’s the same. Accept me, stay with me, love me." His shoulders hunched in despair. "But you never do."