Princess Princess snorted in the row in front of them. ‘It should have been me up there, Daddy,’ she muttered. ‘If I hadn’t left my electric blanket on I’d have defeated the Greedle all on my own. I just didn’t want the palace to burn down.’
‘Really? Good show. Well done,’ said the King vaguely. ‘Who’s that chap with the banana? I say, is there any chance of a nice cold sorbet and a few serfs waving fans?’
Dr Mussells had finished the lists of students who were going up a level, but he didn’t sit down. Instead, he looked around the hall.
‘And now,’ he said loudly. ‘The School Medal for Outstanding Heroism. This medal is only awarded once every ten years. But this year the staff have unanimously decided it is time to award it again — to Yesterday, Mug and Boojum Bark!’
Boo blinked. Surely he’d misheard. ‘What?!’
‘Told you all get medals,’ bellowed Graunt Doom happily.
Mug gave him a gentle pull. ‘Us supposed to go up now!’
‘But … but I didn’t —’ Boo’s paws were leaping off the chair even while his mind was saying no.
Boo padded up to the stage in a daze, with Mug and Yesterday beside him. Dr Mussells held out a tiny furry hand. His other hand held a large gold medal and a banana. ‘Congratulations, Boojum.’
‘But, sir, I can’t take this!’ cried Boojum, as he held his paw out automatically.
‘But I thought you liked bananas,’ said Dr Mussells.
‘I mean the medal!’
Dr Mussells stared. ‘I don’t think we’ve ever had a student refuse a medal before. Have we, Ms Snott?’
Ms Snott casually threw a dagger into the ceiling, where it pinged into the rock. ‘Not a single belly-bouncing, ear-wax-dribbling pile of lizard-doo one of them.’
‘Well, Boojum? Why can’t you accept the medal?’
‘Because I haven’t been a Hero!’ cried Boo. ‘I’ve never been a Hero! It was just luck the first time, and the second time the mouse did more than I did.’
‘Squeak,’ agreed Squeak, peering out of his pouch and twitching his whiskers.
‘And last time — that was luck too. Mug and Yesterday did the real Hero stuff. I was just there!’
‘Really?’ Dr Mussells turned to face the audience. ‘This is a School for Heroes. But can any student tell me what a Hero is?’
‘Told you he’d ask that question,’ roared Graunt Doom from the back row. She was sitting on her hat now, to stop it misbehaving.
No one put up their hands.
‘Boojum?’ asked Dr Mussells.
Boo’s forehead wrinkled. ‘Well, someone who fights evil.’
‘And did you do that?’
‘Yes, but …’
‘Someone who fights evil,’ said Dr Mussells. ‘Someone who doesn’t run away no matter how great the danger. Someone who stands by their friends, who does their duty. Someone who is there. And you, Boojum Bark, were truly there.’
Dr Mussells clipped the medal onto Boo’s collar.
‘I … thank you, sir,’ said Boo. He offered Dr Mussells his paw.
The cheers nearly lifted the roof.
‘At least he hasn’t widdled on the stage this time,’ said Ms Snott. But she was smiling too. Her wrinkles wiggled in strange ways when she smiled.
‘And I also have very great pleasure,’ said Dr Mussells, ‘in advancing you, too, to Hero, Level 4.’
Boo stared as the cheers rose again, then stumbled off the stage and padded down to his seat in a daze as the choir started singing the school song.
Oh, Heroes we
All try to be.
As you can see
It’s destiny!
He could lead a search party for Mum now. There had to be some way to find the Ghastly Otherwhen! He could —
‘Told Mug you’d get Level 4, boy,’ hollered Graunt Doom. ‘Told him not to tell you, too.’
‘Shhh,’ bellowed Mug’s mum, even louder than Graunt Doom. ‘Singing still going on!’
Yesterday pressed a quick kiss on the top of Boo’s furry head, then blushed. ‘I’m so proud of you!’
The choir had finished now and the teachers were marching out. The parents and students stood, then followed them.
One by one Boo’s classmates stopped to clap him on his furry shoulder.
‘Congratulations, Boo.’
‘Yeah, man, congratulations!’
‘Well done!’
‘Oh, Boo.’ It was Princess Princess. She smiled at him … Princess Princess actually smiled at him. ‘I’m so glad you’re taking me to the dance, Boo,’ said Princess Princess.
‘But … but —’ said Boo.
‘You were planning to ask me, weren’t you?’ cooed Princess Princess.
‘Yes, but …’
‘That’s settled, then. Human form, of course!’ added Princess Princess.
‘Fine heroic-looking girl, that,’ barked the Werewolf General, as Princess Princess sashayed back to join her father.
‘Yes, but …’ said Boo. He glanced at Yesterday. Had she heard?
She had! She was watching him, an expression in her big brown eyes that was hard to read.
‘Told you today be difficult,’ boomed Graunt Doom, putting the now well behaved hat back on her head.
‘Squeak,’ agreed Squeak.
Boo scratched his ear with his back foot. He had everything he’d wanted! He was a Level 4! He could lead a rescue mission to the Ghastly Otherwhen — just as soon as he worked out how to find it! And the most gorgeous girl in the school had asked him to the dance!
How in all the universes was he going to get out of this one?
Author’s Note
There may be other universes and wormholes, though you may not find one under your bed. But if you hear a strange noise in the night, and a feeling of danger seeping up your toes … well, are you ready to be a Hero?
PS: See you in the next book!
Excerpt from School for Heroes Book 2
Dance of the Deadly Dinosaurs
Boojum Bark, student Hero and werewolf, along with Yesterday and her troupe of dancing dinosaurs, the reluctant but gorgeous Princess Princess Sunbeam Caresse of Pewké, Mug the zombie, and Squeak the warrior mouse, head into the Ghastly Otherwhen to rescue Boo’s mum.
But the Ghastly Otherwhen isn’t what Boo expects.
Why do the villagers scream in horror every time Boo lifts his leg?
What excuse will Princess Princess give this time for refusing to Wham! Bam! Pow! the bogeys?
When will Mug get his mutant zombie spaghetti under control?
And how exactly do you dance with a dinosaur?
1
‘You want to what?’ Princess Princess Sunbeam Caresse of Pewké stamped her royal foot. The silver sandal made a squelching sound in the whale’s digestive juices.
‘Shh!’ Boo looked round cautiously. All he could see was the dark red wall of whale’s tummy quivering around them, and Yesterday and Mug sloshing through the ooze in front. But his wolf nose told him lots more. He could smell blood, and fear. The flea bogeys on the whale were just ahead, carving out chunks of whale guts. ‘The bogeys will hear you!’
‘Ha! There aren’t even supposed to be any bogeys any more! Not since the Greedle vanished.’
Yesterday didn’t bother to turn round. ‘The Greedle controlled lots of bogeys to find its food. These are probably just left over. And of course we’re going to help Boo find his mum. That’s what friends do.’
‘Oh, right. So now we’re inside a whale’s yucky tummy hunting leftover bogeys instead of getting ready for the school dance. My new dress is pure gold thread, you know! My dad’s had every gnome in the kingdom spinning it for weeks! And now this crazy werewolf puppy wants us to try to find the Ghastly Otherwhen to rescue his mum …’
‘Ghastly Otherwhen okay now Greedle gone,’ boomed Mug. ‘Maybe,’ he added. His zombie fungus glowed in the darkness of the whale’s belly. Which is useful, thought Boo, as now we don’
t need to use torches to find the flea bogeys who are attacking the whale.
‘Huh! Well I just want to get out of here and get my hair done and … eeeeekk!’
‘There they are!’ yelled Boo. He splashed towards the team of tiny bogeys, busily trying to carve out a section of the whale’s liver. The giant animal quivered in pain again sending the ooze sloshing up aound Boo’s tummy.
‘Stop!’ barked Boo.
‘Here, let me.’ Yesterday could speak to any animal. Even bogeys, thought Boo gratefully.
‘Snnnoooommoooppfoo?’ groaned Yesterday, in what Boo supposed was fluent Flea. He scratched his ear automatically. That was the problem with fleas. You only needed to think the word ‘flea’ and your ear began to itch. And that awkward bit above his tail.
‘Voooommooooo?’ squeaked one of the fleas, in an unexpectedly deep voice. It sounded surprised. ‘Gooo?’
‘Noooocoooooodooooo!’ moaned Yesterday reassuringly.
‘Cooo! Dooo dooo foo!’ The little fleas gazed up at Yesterday, their antennae twitching in delight. Suddenly they began to dance around the whale’s belly, splashing as they went. ‘Dooo dooo foo! Dooo dooo foo!’
‘Let me guess,’ said Boo, as the fleas danced off into the darkness. ‘They’re yelling that the Greedle has gone and they’re free.’
Yesterday smiled. Yesterday didn’t smile often, but it was worth it when she did. ‘Yes. They’re happy. But they don’t know the way to the Ghastly Otherwhen,’ she added. ‘They say the Greedle always sent other bogeys to fetch the stuff they collected.’
Boo nodded sadly. He’d hoped that maybe these bogeys had come from the Ghastly Otherwhen, so he could follow them back there. But he wasn’t going to give up. ‘We may as well head back to school then.’
‘At last!’ Princess Princess pushed back her golden hair, leaving a trail of whale slime. ‘Let’s get out of here fast so I can get my hair done! Which way now?’
Mug pointed.
Princess Princess stared. ‘But that’s …’
‘Out whale bum,’ boomed Mug. ‘We can’t go out of mouth in case we tickle throat and whale sneeze. Whale sneeze crush us all. So out through bum.’
‘Out its bum? Its actual bum?! There’s no way I’m going to go out a whale’s bum. I’m …’
Suddenly the blubbery walls began to contract. It was like being squeezed out of a tube of toothpaste, thought Boo, as the walls closed about him. The giant whale’s sphincter muscles began to push, push, push …
The world grew dark. Boo took a breath, then wished he hadn’t. Hurry up, whale, he thought frantically, as he tried to snort out a noseful of whale-doo doo. How long did it take for a whale doo doo to pass through a whale bum? Hurry uuuuppppp …
And then they were free, whirling in a mass of brown and blood stained water. He tried to dog paddle, but the current was too strong. He swirled along, a tumble of fur, tail and paws.
Suddenly he felt Yesterday grab his tail. She began to pull him, swimming strongly. He was vaguely aware of Mug and Princess Princess swimming beside them. His jaws longed to open and gulp in air. But there was only water. And at last he felt his back scrape under the big ledge of rock that Boo supposed was the closest the Universe of Glug came to a bed. Wormholes in every universe came out under a bed. It was traditional.
His paws felt rock as well. All at once they were sinking again. Down, down, down — but not into water.
For suddenly the water was gone, and the whale-doo too. They were back in the wormhole between the universes they’d just used to travel here, the smooth rock ceiling high above them, the cold air smelling just faintly of strawberry jam.
Boo breathed in a giant lungful. He’d never thought he’d be so glad to smell strawberry jam again. ‘At last!’ Princess Princess wiped whale gunk from her eyes. She began to march down the wormhole. ‘I’ll see you tonight!’ she yelled back at Boo. ‘And don’t forget to Change!’
Boo nodded as he tried to lick the worst of the whale-doo off his fur. Princess Princess would never go to a dance with a puppy dog — not even with a werewolf who’d just been given the School for Heroes medal for Outstanding Bravery and made a Level 4. He’d have to Change into human form. And wear pants, which he hated, and underpants, which were just plain dumb. And try to balance on two feet when he danced …
Actually he wasn’t sure that he wanted to go to the dance with Princess Princess Sunbeam Caresse Von Pewké at all. He’d been going to go with Yesterday, but it was impossible to say no when someone as heroically gorgeous — and royal — as Princess Princess Sunbeam Caresse Von Pewké expected you to do something.
He glanced over at Yesterday guiltily. ‘I … I got you something for the dance,’ he said shyly. He picked up the package. He’d left it in the wormhole before they’d travelled up to Glug.
‘What is it?’
‘A dress. I … I asked Ms Shaggy to make it. She’s the best sewer in the whole of Sleepy Whiskers. I thought you mightn’t have a party dress.’ Yesterday was a slave, sent to improve her skills at the School for Heroes by her masters, the Guardians. She didn’t own anything, he thought, except her tatty tunic snd her rock hut. He gazed up at Yesterday anxiously. Had he offended her? But Yesterday was smiling again.
‘Oh, Boo,’ she said. A tear rolled down her cheek.
Boo stared. He’d never seen Yesterday cry before. Even when she’d dragged the Greedle back to her own universe of rock and dinosaurs she’s never cried. ‘I’ve never had a proper dress.’
She fumbled with the packet, then held up the dress. It was silky green and silver spangled.
‘D—do you like it?’
‘I love it. I love green!’
‘My sister Glug wearing pink fungus,’ boomed Mug, making the wormhole echo. ‘Also pink spangles.’
‘She’ll look lovely.’ Yesterday still sounded tearful as she gazed at her dress. ‘She’ll be the most gorgeous zombie in the world.’
‘I’m sorry I’m not going with you instead,’ said Boo quietly.
Yesterday lifted her chin. Suddenly she was the old Yesterday, full of dignity and courage. ‘That’s okay.’ She shrugged. ‘I’m going with someone else.’
‘Who?’ Boo was surprised at the spark of jealousy he felt. He didn’t know Yesterday had any other friends except for him and Mug. And Squeak, of course, though the mouse hadn’t come with them today. Boo supposed it was washing its whiskers for the dance.
‘A friend,’ said Yesterday.
‘What friend?’ persisted Boo.
Yesterday smiled. ‘A dinosaur, of course. Who else would I go to a dance with?’
Copyright
Angus&Robertson
An imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers
First published in Australia in 2009
This edition published in 2014
by HarperCollinsPublishers Australia Pty Limited
ABN 36 009 913 517
www.harpercollins.com.au
Text copyright © Jackie French 2009
Illustrations copyright © Andrea Faith Potter 2009
The right of Jackie French to be indentified as the author and Andrea Potter as the illustrator of this work has been asserted by them in accordance with the Copyright Amendment (Moral Rights) Act 2000.
This work is copyright.
Apart from any use as permitted under the Copyright Act 1968, no part may be reproduced, copied, scanned, stored in a retrieval system, recorded, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, without the prior written permission of the publisher.
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National Library of Aust
ralia Cataloguing-in-Publication data:
French, Jackie
Lessons for a werewolf warrior/Jackie French; illustrator, Andrea F. Potter.
ISBN: 978 0 207 20076 2 (pbk.)
ISBN: 978 1 460 70387 8 (epub)
Series: French, Jackie. School for heroes ; Book 1
Target Audience: For primary school age. I. Heroes – Juvenile fiction
II. Werewolves – Juvenile fiction III. Supernatural – Juvenile fiction
Other Authors/Contributors: Potter, Andrea F.
A823.3
Cover design by Darren Holt
Cover design and layout by Agave Creative Group
Lessons for a Werewolf Warrior Page 21
