The Story of Us

by AuthorStephanieHenry

  I turn to look at Craig. “I cannot believe I just met Lady A!”

  He laughs, “Yeah, if only you could talk to them.”

  “Hey, I talked!”

  “Barely! I… I…” he makes fun of me, so I hit his shoulder.

  “Seriously, Craig. I can’t believe you did all of this for me. Why did you?”

  “Why not? I knew you’d be psyched to see them.” He shrugs.

  “You’re kind of amazing when you want to be. You’re kind of annoying when you want to be, too,” I tease, “but today amazing wins,” I give him.

  “Amazing enough to deserve a kiss?” he asks, coming closer to me.

  “Ew,” I push him away, “not after you’ve had what’s-her-name’s tongue in your mouth all night.”

  “Do I sense a hint of jealousy?”

  “I have a boyfriend,” I respond seriously.

  “Oh yeah. The one who makes you feel… ordinary.”

  I roll my eyes at him, but then instead of getting upset, I pull him in for a hug. “Thank you,” I whisper into his ear.

  “For you, anything,” he whispers back, holding me tighter.

  “Why are you only good to me? Why do you let everyone else think you’re this badass, carefree guy, when you’re really a thoughtful sweetheart?”

  He chuckles a little and then responds seriously, “When people see good, they expect good. No expectations, no disappointments.”

  That night, Hailey and I stay up late talking. I tell her all about getting a tattoo and how it felt and I even tell her about me and Craig’s conversation in the tattoo shop. Not about his sister, but about the rest of it.

  “Val, I know you don’t want me to say it, but I have to. You like him. Just admit it. And he likes you. I don’t see the problem here.”

  “I can’t be with him, Hail. He’s a player. You saw him with that girl tonight. He’s already bored with Tiffany and onto the next one. Why would I be any different?”

  She shrugs her shoulders and gives me a sympathetic look, but it doesn’t help at all.

  “The thing is… I don’t think I can be with Tyler anymore either,” I add sadly.

  She doesn’t look surprised and she doesn’t even ask why. She just understands.

  “What is wrong with me?” I growl in frustration. “Tyler is perfect. He’s absolutely perfect. He’s sweet and loyal and he’s such a good guy, but…”

  “But no sparks?” Hailey asks.

  “No sparks. None. My heart doesn’t race when he touches me, my skin doesn’t get goosebumps. I thought I could convince myself to… to…”

  “Fall in love with him?” Hailey finishes for me. “Val, when it’s not there, it’s not there. Nothing you can do.”

  “But I want it to be there,” I whine.

  She laughs lightly. Then after a moment, she says, “Val, you know what you have to do. Whether you let yourself fall for Craig or not, you can’t go on being with Tyler. You’re just leading him on and it’s not fair to either of you.”

  “I know,” I sigh.

  It’s quiet for a few minutes, so I roll over, ready to go to sleep. Just when I start to drift off, my phone buzzes from a text, so I roll back over and grab it off the nightstand. It’s Craig.

  “Did you take the bandage off and put more A&D on your tat?”

  I text back. “Yes, father.”

  “Good girl.”

  “I’m not a dog…”

  “Night, princess.”

  I smile as I roll back over, but then I hear my phone buzz again, so I turn back around.

  “Happy birthday.”

  I start to text back that it’s not my birthday, but then I realize its past midnight, so technically it is.

  “Thanks for everything you did for me today and tonight. It means a lot. You really made my birthday special. My first tattoo and meeting Lady A all in the same 24 hrs… It’s definitely one I’ll never forget.”

  “Mission accomplished ;)”

  Chapter 11

  My actual birthday is pretty sucky. I have to break up with Tyler and I spend the majority of the day and evening with my parents, who made it a point to come out and take me to dinner for my birthday. I wasn’t convinced they’d actually show since they were supposed to come months ago when I first moved in and ended up cancelling. It’s great to see them and have that piece of home here, but at the same time it’s beyond frustrating to constantly defend my decision to attend this college. I honestly think my father still has high hopes of me transferring to a more prestigious university. He’s in denial that I’ll actually be here for the next three and a half years. I’m tempted to show him my new tattoo of the college mascot, just to watch his reaction. But I don’t. Because deep down, I’m still his little girl, desperately searching for approval. I know he loves me, I just can’t shake the feeling that he’s constantly disappointed in me. At dinner, they tell me they’ll be away on vacation for Christmas. As distant as my parents and I are, we’ve never spent a Christmas apart. Our holiday is different than most families’, I’m sure. Instead of the wrapped presents, they hand me money to go shopping for myself. But they’ve always been there nonetheless. When I start to make a big deal about them going away this year, they reprimand me for acting like a child.

  “You’re in college now. I’m sure you have better things to do than hang out with your parents. It’s just a vacation. It’s not like we’re moving away for good. You’re a grown adult, stop taking a tantrum.”

  I go to bed early and with a heavy heart, torn between missing my parents and feeling like I’m not enough for them. I awake to the buzz of my phone at 11:57 P.M. to see a text from Craig.

  “How was your day with the rents? Hope u had a great bday, princess.”

  “Honestly, not great. Not bad either, but just not great. I’m in bed… you woke me up. But thanks.”

  “In bed?! It’s your bday! Where is that bf of yours? I’m gonna kick his ass for letting u go to bed early on your bday. You should be livin it up!”

  “It’s not early! And we broke up.”

  “Oh.”

  A minute passes before his next text.

  “Sorry?”

  “Why the question mark?”

  “Cuz I’m not really sorry. But I feel like u might want me to be. Should I be? Did he break your heart? Cuz if he did, on your bday, then I really will kick his ass.”

  “No. I broke up with him. If anything, I broke his heart.”

  “Oh. Good.”

  “It’s not good. It still hurts.”

  “If it hurts then why’d you do it?”

  I can’t answer that question without telling him that he’s the reason. And I won’t do that. Because regardless of what my feelings may or may not be towards Craig, it doesn’t change anything between us. It can’t. So, I change the subject.

  “Why are u up so late anyways?”

  “Just walked Katy back.”

  “Your newest flavor of the week?”

  “Could be serious.”

  “Ha! Yeah, right.”

  “Ouch. Ye of little faith…”

  “Good night, Craig.”

  “Night, princess.”

  The next couple weeks are pretty miserable. I feel like shit after breaking up with Tyler. Not only do I feel like a horrible person for hurting him, but I also feel like I might have made a huge mistake. It weighs on me and I can’t seem to shake the irritated mood I’ve been in. The frigid weather doesn’t help to lift my spirits either. There’s no vibrant colors left outside. The trees are bare and lifeless. There’s not even snow to brighten it up. It’s just grey and biting cold.

  After moving the tables around in my public speaking class, I sit and watch everyone file in from their other classes. I’m grateful that my previous class was in this same room, as I watch everyone else trying to fight off the cold from walking outside. When Craig sits down next to me, I can literally feel the cold air coming off of him. He breathes into his hands, trying to warm them u
p, and then he turns and smiles at me. I have to admit, my heart beats unsteadily. I know how I feel about him now; there’s no point in trying to fool myself anymore. I also know that we could never be anything more than what we are. I’ve watched him go from one girl to another, all the while shamelessly flirting with me. Since my birthday a couple weeks ago, I’ve seen him with six different girls. Six! I can’t say for sure whether he’s slept with all of them or not, but knowing Craig, I wouldn’t put it past him. I can’t be with a guy like that. So I let him flirt, and sometimes I even flirt back. But that’s where it ends.

  Our professor spends the whole class discussing our final oral presentations that we’ll be doing next week. It doesn’t help my sour mood at all. I hate public speaking. I’ve been alright so far, but this last one is longer and more personal.

  “What are you going to talk about?” Craig asks me, referring to the presentation.

  Up until this point, the topics we’ve presented have been assigned to us. This is the first time we get to pick anything we want. At the beginning of the class, it sounded like this assignment would be the easiest, but now I can see why it’s the final exam. It’s definitely harder when it’s more individualized for each of us, more personal.

  “Honestly, I don’t even want to think about it. It makes me sick to my stomach every time I think about the speaking days and this one is even worse.”

  “I never would have known. You always seem so confident.”

  “What? I’m anything but! I shake, literally shake, every time I have to stand up there.”

  “Chew gum before you speak next week.” I give him a skeptical look, so he explains, “No, really. It’s supposed to help. I can’t remember where I heard it, but evidently if you chew something, it tricks the brain into thinking that there’s no need to be nervous. Because if you were in any real danger, you wouldn’t be eating or chewing on anything. Chewing tells the brain you’re safe. Nerves gone.”

  I laugh, but it actually kind of makes sense. “Okay, I’ll give it a try.”

  Without cheerleading practices taking up the majority of my free time anymore, I’m actually kind of bored when I get done with my classes for the day. Sometimes I watch the upperclassmen cheerleaders practice. They’re season is officially over but they still have competition coming up, which means more practice than ever for them. But freshman don’t compete, so technically I’m done cheering until next year. More often than not, I find myself hanging out at the Grind, where Craig still works but Tiffany has been MIA lately. Maybe she quit when Craig found his next girl. Whatever happened, I haven’t asked. I sit, mainly by myself, with my laptop and books. I work on my assignments and try to warm up with the hot flowing liquid that I can’t seem to go more than a couple hours without.

  I’m knee-deep in my psychology assignment when I feel someone tap me on the shoulder and I nearly jump out of my skin.

  “You scared the shit out of me, Hailey!”

  “Sorry. Can we talk?”

  She has that look on her face that tells me something is wrong.

  “Yeah, what’s up?”

  “Something’s going on with Drew,” she confesses, taking a seat across from me.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe it’s nothing…”

  “Hail, I can’t help if you don’t tell me.”

  She hesitates and then takes a deep breath. “Honestly, I think he might be…” she trails off, not wanting to finish the sentence. I can see tears in her eyes, even though I can tell she’s trying to hide it by blinking them away.

  “Hailey, whatever’s going on, you can tell me.”

  She looks away, still blinking. “I think he’s cheating on me,” she whispers.

  “No,” I state automatically. Drew would never cheat on Hailey. If I know anything, it would be that. He’s head over heels in love with her. “Hailey, Drew would never. Why would you ever even think that?”

  “I know it sounds crazy, but it’s the only explanation. He’s been getting phone calls and he’s ambiguous about them, like he’s hiding them from me. He always says ‘can’t talk right now, call me later’ or something to that effect when he answers. And it’s not just the phone calls. It’s like he doesn’t want to spend as much time with me anymore. I feel him pushing me away. When I stop by his dorm, he tries to get me out as fast as he can. I can tell he’s hiding something.”

  She’s becoming increasingly upset, so I pack up my stuff and usher her out of the Grind before she makes a scene. I know she wouldn’t want Craig to see her crying and ask Drew about it. It’s freezing outside, so we walk back to our dorm. Fortunately, Julie and Ashley aren’t around to ask questions. We walk straight into our own room, just in case they do come back.

  “Okay, Hail. This is ridiculous. Drew is in love with you. He’s in love with you in the way girls wish guys would fall for them. He’s like the perfect guy. He’s sweet and caring and… loyal! He’s faithful. Besides, you’re gorgeous. He’d be crazy to look elsewhere. I know he isn’t cheating on you, so please stop worrying about that. It might be something else, but it’s not that. Drew is a good guy.”

  I can see her start to calm down a bit, as my words sink in. “What could it be then?”

  “I don’t know,” I admit, “But we’ll find out.”

  During the next few days, I prepare my speech for my public speaking class and study for my other finals in between trying to figure out what’s going on with Drew. I wish I could just come right out and ask him, but Hailey won’t allow it. If I were still with Tyler, I could ask him to snoop a little or eavesdrop on a phone conversation. But I don’t think he’d be happy to hear from me, and I could guess he would be even less happy with me asking favors. So, I do what any college girl would do. I stalk his Facebook. Religiously. I check through all of his friends and mark down the ones I don’t know. I follow his activity and check through his page often. I don’t tell Hailey what I find though, because honestly it doesn’t look good. This one girl, Charlie, is a red flag. I don’t think Hailey’s noticed because of the name. Her profile pic is of a girl and a guy together, and because of the name, I thought it was the guy. But evidently, Charlie is the girl in the pic. She doesn’t talk to Drew directly, which is weird. But she’s liked a few of his pictures. And there’s one picture that she commented on, but only to say, “This one.” Obviously, there’s more to that conversation that either took place in a private message or that Drew deleted. I can’t help but wonder if Hailey is right. I don’t want to believe it though. I can’t help but hold Drew and Hailey’s relationship on a pedestal. They’re just so perfect. If they can’t make it, what hope is there for anyone else?

  I have a mix of emotions as I sit and watch people walk into public speaking. On the one hand, I’m relieved that I’ve taken all of my final exams and this is the last class that I have. On the other hand, I’m beyond nervous about my speech. When Craig walks in, he hands me a piece of gum and I give him a knowing smile in return. When the professor comes in, she starts the class right away. I chew while I listen to four speeches before Craig’s name is called. He walks confidently up to the front of the classroom and begins.

  “We were told this speech could be about anything of our choosing. And while I’ve thoroughly enjoyed Mike’s speech on why the green M&Ms are better than the other colors,” everyone chuckles, “I thought I would use this speech as an opportunity to say some things that I’ve always wanted to say, but never have. So here goes,” he takes a deep breath and shakes out his hands before speaking again.

  “She’s different. She’s unique. She’s beautiful.”

  He pauses for a moment in emphasis and then continues.

  “Our differences are what make us beautiful. Or so I’ve been told. But obviously not everyone thinks this way. The differences that I see are different from the differences you see. I see someone more literal, more specific. You see someone stupid; someone childish. Her brain works differently so you dism
iss her without a thought. But if you took the time to get to know her, you’d understand. You’d understand that she’d always choose to take the time to get to know you. Maybe not in the conventional way, but she would nonetheless. And that makes her a better person than you. While you snub your nose at her and look down on her, she is actually the better one. Her brain may work differently, but her compassion outreaches any of ours. Her humanity and kindness are forces to be reckoned with. She is beautiful inside and out. Yes, she is awkward. And that makes you uncomfortable. Tough. Get over it. She doesn’t know how to accept change. She doesn’t understand sarcasm. She’s obsessed with Disney, boy bands, stuffed animals, and me. She doesn’t fit in. She panics in crowds. Her vocabulary is limited. She can’t make small-talk. She doesn’t conform to a mold that society has made. She is one of a kind. And she is beautiful. She is beautiful because she’s different. And if you can’t understand that, then maybe you should consider the fact that you are not a good person. Because good people focus on what others can do, not on what they can’t. She’s not broken. She doesn’t need to be fixed. Just because you can’t understand her, doesn’t mean she is not communicating. Some of the most wonderful people are the ones who don’t fit into boxes. She is different, yes. But she is not less. She is so much more.”

  He stands there, looking back at all of us. The room is so silent, you could hear a pin drop. The seriousness of that speech is enough to shock everyone, especially after Mike’s M&M speech and Cora’s attempt to get people to join the drama club. Even knowing about his sister, I’m still shocked about the speech myself. I’m shocked that he had the guts to say those things to his peers. He admittedly hid his sister’s disability from his friends growing up. And yet, he just poured his heart out about it in front of a whole classroom, most of whom are strangers to him. I watch as he walks over to the professor, talks to her quietly, and then leaves the room.

  I raise my hand until the professor notices me. “Can I go with him?” I ask, feeling stupid for asking, but wanting so desperately to go tell him how beautiful that was.