Even though I told him this wasn’t his present, I walk towards him slowly and deliberately. When our bodies are only centimeters apart, I reach for the hem of his shirt and slowly pull it up. I hear his breath catch and it encourages me to go on. I bend down until my lips are just above the buckle of his belt and I let my lips linger there for a moment before I lick them and then kiss his stomach, just below his belly button.
“What are you doing?” he manages to croak out.
I don’t answer. I travel up higher, kissing his abs as I go. I travel up his chest. I struggle with his shirt until he rips it off up over his head with little effort. I continue on with my path up his chest and then reach his neck. I press my body hard against his as I kiss his neck. I hear him groan quietly and I know I have his full attention. I skim his jaw line with small, lingering kisses until I reach his mouth. I hesitate, wanting him to open his eyes and look at me. He does. “I want you,” I whisper to him. “All of you.”
I see the expression on his face change. I see the desire smoldering in his eyes. Still, he asks, “Are you sure?”
I nod once, and that’s all the reassurance he needs.
He kisses me so hungrily, I lose my breath. And just when I think I might pass out rather than pull away, he breaks the kiss and travels down my neck. He brushes the strap of my tank top down and kisses my bare shoulder. Then he travels across my collar bone and over to my other shoulder, letting that strap fall down too. Then he travels straight down the middle, kissing my chest. I let my head fall back and I arch my back, giving him full access to my breasts. He holds the small of my back while taking my right nipple in his mouth. He sucks, then licks, then sucks again. Then he moves onto the left side with the same delightful torture. He pulls my tank top over my head and kneads my breasts as he kisses my stomach. Then he cups the bottom of my backside and lifts my thighs up onto him. I straddle him easily as he supports my weight. I run my hands through his hair before he gently lays me down on my bed, placing himself on top of me.
I have a moment of clarity where I think I can’t do this. I wonder about how many girls he’s been with and how much experience he has. I’ll pale in comparison.
“You okay?” he asks in a husky voice, bringing his face up to mine.
I pause for a moment.
“We don’t have to…” he starts.
But my moment of clarity is over and I pull him down on me.
When I wake up in the morning, I’m tangled up in Craig, my legs and his intertwined. My head is against his chest and I lay there, listening to his steady heartbeat. I turn my head and start to kiss his chest. I feel his arms tighten around me.
“Good morning, princess,” he says in a sleepy voice. I know he’s smiling without looking up at him. I can hear it in his voice.
I just keep kissing him. I kiss his chest, his neck.
“God damn woman, I’m not a machine,” he jokes, making me laugh out loud.
In a swift, sudden motion, he’s on top of me. He pins my hands up above my head, but to my surprise, he keeps his distance.
“You’re gonna be sore today. I don’t want to hurt you any more than I already have.”
It’s not until he says it that I start to feel the dull pain between my legs; the soreness that can only come from losing my virginity. I get a fleeting moment of bravery and I ask, albeit shyly, “Is it really that or do you just not want to because I was bad at it? Because, you can tell me if I was bad at it. I’d want to know so I can, you know, fix it.”
Confusion crosses his face for a moment. “Princess, trust me when I say that you were perfect last night. And if you think I don’t want to, that’s the furthest thing from the truth. I was trying to be a nice guy. I guess it doesn’t suit me,” he states, his lips turning up in a mischievous smirk. “Bad guy it is,” he says before lifting me up on top of him.
That’s when we hear the front door open and shut. We both freeze for a moment, as if trying to make sure we heard right. When we hear more commotion downstairs, I panic. Who the hell would be here? The only answer I can come up with is my parents, even though they’re supposed to be away. I jump off of Craig and scramble around trying to find pieces of clothing. I throw his at him when I come across it and I hurriedly put mine on. I have my panties and pajama pants on when I look over at Craig, who is fully dressed – boxers, jeans, shirt, socks and shoes. “How much practice have you had at this?” I whisper to him. He just smirks. I find a sweatshirt and throw it on while I listen to my parents climbing up the stairs.
“How do I get out of here?” Craig asks with wide eyes.
“We’re on the second floor, you don’t.” I finish just before the door to my room opens.
My parents stand there, mouths agape, eyes wide.
“Mom, dad. I thought you guys weren’t coming back until…”
“Clearly,” is all my mother says, her mouth still hanging open.
My father, on the other hand, hasn’t looked at me once. His glare is set on Craig. When he talks, it feels like the whole house booms. “What is going on here?!”
“It’s not what you think, dad. He didn’t want me to be alone on Christmas.”
He finally looks over at me and I wish he didn’t. His eye burn a hole through my chest. The anger mixed with disappointment is so clearly evident. I instantly start to cry. I know I’m a wimp. I know Craig is going to think I’m an emotional idiot. But I can’t help it. I feel the tears well up in my eyes and my face turns red with humiliation. I try to open my mouth and explain again, but the lump in my throat is too large to break through.
Craig tries instead. “Sir, I know I shouldn’t be here. But your daughter means a lot to me and I just wanted to wake her up on Christmas morning and let her know that she’s not alone. I got here just minutes before you did.”
But even as he’s telling the lie, I can see my father inspecting his bedhead.
“Get out,” my father barks at him.
Instead of obeying, Craig looks back at me. He searches my face trying to figure out if I’ll be alright. I nod to him, reassuring him that he can go, mostly because I’m afraid that if he doesn’t leave right this instant, my father will, physically and literally kill him.
Everything after that is a blur.
I listen while my father hollers about knowing that WSC would be no good for me. I hear him talk about the white trash who attend there. I hear him put Craig into that white trash category. I don’t even try to defend him. I know now’s not the time. I sit and I listen… and listen… and listen. My mother backs him up, of course, but doesn’t yell nearly as much. When they finish, my father takes one last deep breath and asks, “What do you have to say for yourself?”
“I’m sorry.” My voice sounds so small.
That Christmas was equally the best and worst of my life.
I spend the rest of my winter break sucking up to my parents. I feel like a zombie in my own skin, going through the motions, emotionless.
Craig shows up two days after the incident of their surprise arrival home and tries to apologize to my parents. He brings a bottle of whiskey and some chocolates. He tries to tell them that it was a misunderstanding, but they dismiss him quickly.
I spend New Year’s Eve texting Craig from my bedroom and silently cursing my parents for ruining this night for us. At midnight exactly, I have my cell in my hand texting that I wish I could be kissing him, when I hear a soft knock on my bedroom window. My heart jumps out of my chest until I notice that it’s Craig. Then my heart starts racing for a completely different reason. I lift open the window and stare at him in amazement.
“How on Earth did you get up here?” I whisper, looking out the window and noticing exactly how he managed it. Unlike every other girls’ bedroom in America, mine has nothing in front of or below it - no tree, no trellis, no shed, no smaller roof – nothing that could possibly be used to help a boy sneak in and out. So Craig, being Craig, brought a ladder. A full scale ladder.
I turn to
him with a wide smile, but before I can say anything, his lips are on mine. He kisses me urgently at first, but then gently, sweetly, sincerely. It’s a kiss that melts my heart.
When he pulls away, he finally addresses the ladder. “It was the only way. And I couldn’t not kiss you at midnight on New Year’s Eve.”
But the moment is bittersweet because in a matter of minutes from him climbing into my bedroom window, I hear footsteps coming down the hall. “You have to go,” I whisper.
He kisses me one more time, quickly, before turning to leave.
I hear my father outside my bedroom door. I can tell they’re his because they’re the sound of a heavy shoe, instead of my mother’s heels. His footsteps stop and I hold my breath, waiting for him to open the door and see Craig climbing back out the window. But then they resume walking and I’m able to breathe again. I watch Craig get to the bottom of the ladder and then quietly pull it back to him, tuck it under his arm sideways, and then walk down the dark street. I’m just glad my bedroom is on the opposite side of the house as the living room and kitchen, where my mom would have, without a doubt, seen him.
I play the good girl until it’s time to go back to school. The morning I’m scheduled to go back, my dad sits me down for an hour long lecture, which pretty much consists of threatening to pull me from WSC. So I make promises and I tell him everything he wants to hear and nothing he doesn’t. I know he wants what’s best for me. It’s not entirely his fault. He’s been preprogrammed to think this way. He’s been taught that people who have money are superior. He looks down on public schools and boys from the wrong side of town. And for the first time, I can tell with certainty that he looks down on me too.
My parents drive me back to campus, which is beyond awkward. But luckily, they don’t even come in to my dorm when we arrive. They just drop me at the front entrance.
When I walk in, Hailey, Julie, and Ashley are all there. I feel the warmth of home that I didn’t feel walking back into my childhood home after being away for months. It’s only been a few months here and already, it’s more my home than my actual house is. I catch up with the girls for a few minutes, but then ask to talk to Hailey alone. In the confines of our little dorm, I spill about everything. About the kiss outside after the party, about meeting Craig’s family, about losing my virginity to him, and about my parents unexpected return home the morning after. I watch her expressions change while I talk, but she doesn’t say anything until I’m completely done.
“Wow,” she whispers. Then she sits in silence, stunned.
We sit there for a minute, neither of us talking. But it’s not awkward, it’s comforting, both of us sorting through it all, together but separately.
“I can’t believe you took Craig Morgan to the country club,” she says when she finally speaks again. She looks over at me and we both laugh so hard that it takes effort to stop.
“Out of everything I just told you, that’s what you can’t believe?” I ask, still smiling.
“Just be glad your parents didn’t catch a glimpse of your tattoo,” she reminds me. And for some reason, this causes us to burst into hysterics again. The idea of my parents finding out that I got a tattoo would result in a fate worse than death, especially my father catching sight of the WSC mascot, of all things, permanently affixed to me. But the looks on their faces would be pretty funny.
“So you and Craig,” Hailey says, quietly.
“Yepp. Me and Craig.”
We sit there for a minute and then, even though I know Hailey understands, I still feel the need to explain. “You know how there are people who bring out the worst in you? And then there are people who bring out the best in you? Well, Craig just brings out the most in me. The most of everything. He makes me feel alive.”
She nods in understanding. “I know he loves you, Val. I’ve known for a while. But instead of saying ‘I told you so,’ I’m just going to say I’m really happy for you both.”
Finally, I ask her about Michigan. She tells me about her family there and I can’t help but be a little resentful that she hasn’t asked me to go with her to meet them yet. She took Drew with her when she went for the first time, and every time after that, except for this last time when she went alone. I’ve heard about her brothers and sisters from the stories she tells me, but I haven’t actually had the chance to meet them yet. Maybe I’ll suggest a summer road trip… God knows it’ll be better than staying at my parent’s.
“How about Drew?” I ask hesitantly.
“I barely talked to him the whole break,” she says, in almost a whisper.
“Seriously?”
Silence.
“Hailey, call him.”
She shrugs her shoulders.
“Hailey. Call him. Right now. Or better yet, go to his dorm.”
“Val, if he wanted to talk to me, he would have. Did you see him at all during the break?”
“No. I didn’t see him at all other than that first night. But then again, my parents held me captive after Christmas, so I really didn’t see anyone.”
As if on cue, Ashley yells through our dorm room door that Drew is here.
Hailey’s eye bug out and she looks really nervous as she walks past me and opens the door.
I watch as Drew looks at her, not moving forward to embrace her, and I wonder what the hell is wrong with him. He’s damn lucky to have her and he knows it. Or at least he used to know it. I can’t hide the dirty look on my face towards him and I know he sees it. Good. He deserves it. He deserves so much worse.
“Can we talk?” he asks Hailey.
I feel the pit in my stomach immediately. The talk. It’s never a good thing. My heart breaks for Hailey as I watch her go with Drew. I’m left wondering about them for the next two hours, until Craig comes in and takes my mind off of it.
Chapter 16
Seeing Craig after everything that’s happened feels a little awkward at first. But Craig, being Craig, breaks the tension immediately.
“So, how was the rest of your break?” I ask, twisting my hands in front of me, a nervous habit I’ve somehow managed to acquire in the last two seconds. Why am I so nervous all of a sudden?
“Princess, come here.”
“Why?” I ask skeptically.
“Because I haven’t kissed you in what feels like forever and I’m literally dying over here. Come here.”
I glance over at Ashley and Julie before walking over to Craig. They look pretty shocked and for a brief moment I’m a little embarrassed. Then I realize how ridiculous that is and then I’m embarrassed that I was just embarrassed about my boyfriend. And even though I know Craig didn’t realize my brief moment of discomfort, I make up for it anyway. I throw my arms around him and kiss him hard, showing him how much I’ve missed him. I only realize how deep the absence of him impacted me when I feel him wrap his arms tightly around me, embracing me with a warmth that comforts me beyond flesh and skin, but rather deep down into my soul. Then, not because I’m embarrassed anymore, but because I simply want to move away from the girls’ scrutinizing eyes, I grab his hand and lead him into my dorm room.
“God, I missed you.” I tell him.
He gives me his all-too-famous sideways smirk before he replies, “Likewise princess, likewise.”
I finally tell him all about Hailey and Drew and that I’m truly nervous for them. I feel like I’m betraying Hailey’s trust, but I’m hoping maybe Craig knows something about what’s going on with Drew. Or at the least, maybe he can talk some sense into him.
“They’ll be fine,” he assures me.
“How can you be sure?”
“Do you trust me?”
“Yes,” I respond without hesitation, which actually frightens me. When did I begin to put an unyielding amount of trust in him? In Craig Morgan. Haven’t I always thought he would break my heart? I never felt myself starting to slowly trust him. It’s like it just happened overnight. He was the person I had the least amount of trust in and then suddenly, just like that,
I trust him wholeheartedly. I trust him with my life.
“Then trust me when I say that Drew and Hailey will be just fine. I’m not saying this because I think they’ll be fine. I’m saying this because I know they’ll be fine.”
“How could you possibly know that? Unless you know what’s going on?” I ask, hoping that if he does know something, he’ll tell me.
“No. I have no idea what’s going on with Drew. But I know they’ll be fine the same way I know that we’ll be fine. Because when you love someone, you can’t just walk away. They love each other. It’s clear to anyone who has ever met them. They’ll have rough times, sure. But they’ll get through them.”
“Craig Morgan, my hopeless romantic,” I tease.
He grabs me, causing me to scream in surprise, and throws me onto my bed. As I lean up to kiss him, I hear his phone ring. He ignores it, so I take it out of his pocket myself. He doesn’t stop me.
“It says ‘home,’ shouldn’t you answer?”
“Ugh,” he groans in frustration before answering. But he shows no sign of frustration in his voice when he greets, “Hey Lex.”
How did he know it was Lexie and not his parents, I wonder? Regardless, I’m glad he’s talking to her openly in front of me now. Before he’d ignore the call altogether or he’d answer but keep it extremely short.
“I know, Lexie,” “I’ll be back soon, Lex,” “I miss you too.”
It melts my heart at how attached his sister is to him. He’ll make a great dad someday. I can’t believe the thought just crossed my mind, because I’m not even sure I want kids at all… but it’s true; he would. Craig Morgan. Who would have thought?
He hangs up and brings his attention back to me, he opens his mouth to say something but suddenly Hailey walks in. Her eyes widen in surprise when she sees me and Craig on my bed, but she recovers quickly.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt anything.”
“You weren’t,” I tell her honestly.
The Story of Us Page 15
