“Don’t cry, Jessa.” Lance held her face in his hands and swiped away the tears with his thumbs. “Like I said, he’s okay. I know it. We’ll find him.”
She nodded, attempting to sniffle back a year of sadness. “I believe you.” And yet she couldn’t get a grip, not up here so close to her dad’s final moments. “It’s just…my father.” She swallowed so hard her throat ached. “Sometimes it’s hard to be up here.” God those tears burned her eyes. “I wish I would’ve been with him. I wish I could’ve been holding his hand when he…” She couldn’t bring herself to say it. It was so horrible. So, so horrible to think of him out here in pain and terrified as the world dimmed and life faded from his body. Instinctively, her hand reached up to finger the necklace he’d given her. It had been his last gift. A rose gold heart with a small diamond embedded inside.
“It’s real pretty,” Lance said, looking down at the charm. “He give it to you?”
She nodded, tensing her throat so her voice wouldn’t wobble. “I miss him. I should’ve been around more.”
She half expected Lance to lecture her on living in the past, on not letting the regrets take over, like so many other people had done. Instead, he pulled her against him, wrapping her up in the comfort and peace of a long, sturdy hug. And despite the potential dangers, she let her head rest against him. She breathed in the calming scent of leather and coffee.
“I wish I knew what those minutes were like.” The minutes before he closed his eyes and gave in. Maybe that would bring her peace. Maybe it would give her the permission to let her regrets go.
Lance moved back slightly and took her chin in his hand. She felt the roughness of his skin, the calluses, the coarseness of scabs from healing scrapes. Gently, he tilted her head up until she was staring straight at the sky. So blue, the color itself seemed alive, bottomless in its perfection. Fluffy clouds billowed and moved and floated, a fluid dance. And the sun, so bright and clear it seemed to make everything sparkle.
“That’s what he would’ve been looking at,” he murmured, the deep vibration of his voice close to her temple. “The sky, the mountains.”
Jessa let her eyes soak it all in until she felt so full with the beauty and wonder of the world, she had to close them. “It’s beautiful.” Didn’t matter how many times she saw it. This view, these mountains, that endless royal sky always struck her. And her dad had loved it, too. He would’ve wanted this to be the last thing he ever saw.
“It’s peaceful up here,” Lance said, looking up, too. “Maybe a little what Heaven’s like.”
The words held a gift, a surprise ray of hope that penetrated her doubts. “You believe in Heaven?”
Those lips quirked in a small smile, and even though he was so dark, with that mussed hair and tanned sun-drenched skin, his eyes were lit with energy. “I like to believe there’s something more.”
More. The word spread over her like a healing salve, alleviating the lingering throb from the wounds of loss. All these years, she’d been wrong about Lance. She’d thought him to be closed off and grouchy, a man of few words who got annoyed easily, but now she realized she’d misjudged him. He might not do small talk, but a seven-word sentence from Lance meant more than paragraphs from most people.
Her eyes opened and color flooded in. The first thing she saw were his lips, right there, inches from hers. The tendons that threaded her joints together loosened and sparks crackled in her heart. She inhaled his musky scent, let her gaze rest in his. Such beautiful clear eyes. Deep and wise. And yes, she seemed to be moving in closer now but she couldn’t fight that pull, couldn’t stop the hard cry of need and desire that pushed her into him. Her palms came to rest on his chest as her lips grazed his. But that one light touch wasn’t enough. Wasn’t nearly enough…so she went for it—a full-on kiss, lips fused to his, sighing, searching…
Except his chest tensed and he seemed to step back. An icy realization splashed her face, dousing the passion that had ignited. Lance didn’t want to be kissing her. He’d offered her a kind word because she was upset. That was all.
That was all.
Throat thick and pulsing, she slowly eased back, the warmth that had bathed her lips turning cold.
Lance stood stock-still, his own lips parted, arms out as though he’d lost his balance, chest suspended like he wasn’t sure if he should breathe in or out.
“Oh my God.” Invisible flames of humiliation licked at her cheeks. “I’m so sorry.” She’d freaking kissed him! Less than a day after swearing off men, she’d let that swirl of emotion and desire and hope sweep her up into its kingdom of seduction. Her skin tingled. The sunlight seemed too bright. “I didn’t mean to…I shouldn’t have…” Kissed him. On the lips. Like they’d been transported into some sappy chick flick. They were supposed to be searching for Luis! Holy baldheaded cats, what the hell was the matter with her? She couldn’t even go one day without swooning. She needed help. Romantics Anonymous. Hello, my name is Jessa and I’m addicted to love…
Might as well face it.
Lance simply stood there, saying nothing, an unreadable expression frozen on his face.
Not surprising. He was clearly in a state of shock. Or disbelief? Repulsion? It was impossible to tell. That fight or flight survival instinct kicked her hard under the ribs. “We should find your dad,” she said quickly, turning so he wouldn’t see the fierce blush that had brought her about two inches from passing out. “Let’s go this way.”
With desperation in her steps, she tromped toward the boulder field before she could screw up anything else.
Chapter Five
Two seconds ago, he could’ve sworn Jessa’s lips were pressed to his, warm and wet and the slightest bit naughty. If it hadn’t been for the smear of some honey-flavored lip gloss on his bottom lip, he would’ve thought he’d imagined the whole thing because she was gone. As in out of sight. And he was still standing in the same position he’d assumed when she knocked his world off its axis and kissed him.
Shit. He’d screwed that up. Royally. Who could blame him, though? He’d never expected Jessa to press herself against him and kiss him. Never expected the rush it brought in him, either. She’d caught him off guard, knocked him off balance. And yes, he could see how stiffening and stepping back may have sent her a certain message, but it was a reflex. Either regain balance or land on his ass. His body had reacted and made the choice for him.
He squinted in the direction that Jessa had stormed off. The boulder field was sloped and she’d already disappeared on the other side of the rise. “Jessa!” he yelled, not exactly sure how to find her. But he had to. Had to find her, somehow undo the awkwardness he must’ve made her feel. And they still had to find his dad, too. So he stepped off the way she’d gone, trying to follow her path. He skirted around a hunk of granite as tall as him. Went over a smaller boulder, then hoisted himself up and gazed around. There. She was weaving her way through the rocks about thirty yards up.
“Hey!” he called again. “Wait up.” He climbed down, trying to formulate an explanation in his head. Except he didn’t have one. Usually when women started crying in front of him, his forehead would crank itself tight and he’d slowly back away, scanning for a fast escape. But he kind of hadn’t minded comforting Jessa. He certainly hadn’t minded the feel of her soft breasts against his chest and her silky lips locked on his…
In fact, he didn’t mind this whole excursion as much as he’d thought he would.
Though Jessa slowed her pace, she didn’t stop to wait for him. Her chin had lifted with determination, her eyes focused ahead and her arms swooshing at her sides.
The sight drew out a smile. Sure, he felt bad that she seemed embarrassed, but God she was captivating with that fortitude. Continuing on like the whole thing hadn’t bothered her at all. He’d met women before who would’ve whined about his reaction, who would’ve gone for the guilt trip. Not Jessa. She’d simply hauled off and left him standing there like she didn’t need him anyway.
&nb
sp; By the time he’d closed in on her, he was out of breath. “Are you okay?” He tried to hide the wheeze in his lungs through a hearty throat clearing.
“Spectacular,” she muttered, stomping on.
His hand snagged her shoulder and forced her to stop. “Come on. It’s not a big deal.” At least it shouldn’t have been. Hell, he’d been kissed by his fair share of women. A couple had even caught him off guard before. None had rendered him unable to walk, however. Or to think straight. His eyes searched hers.
They were dark, but the sunlight made the flecks of bronze in them glisten. There was a force in her gaze. She didn’t shy away or narrow her eyes angrily at him. She simply stared back, open and unfazed.
“I was surprised,” he admitted, leaving out the whole truth. Surprised and thrown off balance by his body’s fast response to her. “And I—”
“Can we forget it?” she interrupted. “Please? I’m just emotional. Maybe even a little hormonal this week. You know how it goes.”
“Uh.” No. He didn’t. He really didn’t.
“And let’s face it,” she went on. “You’re PDF, so it’s not my fault, exactly.”
“PDF?” he repeated. He sucked at acronyms. Had to use Google to decode most of Levi’s Facebook posts. He’d never been good with words. PDF…PDF… “Poor dumb fool?”
Those glistening baby browns rolled. “Pretty. Damn. Fine. Don’t you get out?”
“Not as much as you would think,” he admitted. Lately he hadn’t gotten out at all. He was supposed to be training his ass off.
“So you can see how something like that would’ve happened,” she said, lifting her chin again. “The emotions. The whole smoldering cowboy thing you’ve got going on. But I’d really appreciate it if we could forget it. Like, completely erase it from our memories. Because, Lance, I’ve sworn off men. Romance. All of it, really. Gotta shift my focus, you know? Don’t need it messing up my life anymore. So please. This never happened.”
He’d never enjoyed a woman babbling. Ever. Until today. “Okay. I guess. But—”
“Nope. See, ‘but’ is a segue back into the same topic we just agreed to forget. As in never mention it; never even remember it. We entered into a verbal agreement, which can be legally binding in the state of Colorado,” she finished, looking quite proud of herself.
“Can it now?” He didn’t even try to hide his amusement. He’d known Jessa for years. Or at least he’d known about her. To him, she’d always been Buzz Love’s daughter, the gangly girl with the glasses. He thought her to be nice though somewhat shy, maybe even awkward. But they’d never had a real conversation before this morning. She was actually fun to talk to.
“Yes,” she uttered with a definitive nod. “As a matter of fact it can.”
“What if I said go ahead and sue me?” He pressed his gaze into hers again. “Because I’m not sure I’ll be able to forget. I didn’t mind you kissing me.”
She laughed. “Right. You didn’t mind.” The words mocked him. “Your shoulders felt like concrete. And the way you stepped back…I actually thought you were gonna bolt.” But she waved a hand through the air as if it didn’t matter. “Listen, I get it. You’re Lance Cortez. Sort of famous. Rugged. Hot. I’m just Jessa. Normal girl who smells like animals half the time.”
Not right now she didn’t. Right now she smelled like the vanilla beans Naomi sometimes set around his father’s kitchen. And what was wrong with normal? Kind of refreshing to have a woman say things like they were instead of what she thought he wanted to hear for once.
“Besides all of that, I’ve sworn off kissing.” She turned away and started to hike again, giving him no choice but to follow.
“That seems a little extreme.” He kept his eyes focused on the ground so he wouldn’t trip over a rock and look like a dumb ass. “Isn’t there something else you could swear off? Sugar? Chocolate? Alcohol? Seems to me kissing is one of those things that’s actually good for you.” Especially when it led to sex. Weren’t there a bunch of health benefits associated with sex? Sure seemed like it. Not that kissing Jessa would lead to sex. Because how weird would that be? Having sex with this woman who hung out with his father? Who wanted marriage and kids and the whole bit so badly she’d been engaged multiple times? His body didn’t seem to think it would be weird, though. The quick flash of a conjured image was enough to activate the launch sequence. Steam seemed to radiate off his face and cloud the brisk mountain air.
“Actually, I happen to think alcohol and chocolate are much healthier than kissing. At least in my experience,” Jessa insisted, scrambling to climb over a tall boulder that blocked their path. She moved effortlessly. Her feet and hands knew exactly where to go. While she finessed it, he awkwardly scaled the thing with sheer strength.
When they’d gotten past the obstacle he slipped in front of her. Wouldn’t be as easy for her to get around him.
“So that’s it then,” he challenged.
“That’s it.” Her gaze didn’t waver and he didn’t doubt that she meant it.
“Oh, wait. Actually, one more thing. I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t say anything to anyone else. The girls would kill me if they knew I’d already slipped up and—”
A shrill whistle cut her off. For a second he thought he’d imagined it, but then it rang out again.
“Luis,” she whispered, gripping Lance’s coat. “That’s your dad.”
* * *
“How do you know it’s him?” Lance jogged alongside her, seeming to be hardly out of breath while she hiccupped and gagged on the thin mountain air.
“He told me if I ever needed help out here, I should whistle exactly like that,” she sputtered, clutching at the pains needling her chest. And then Luis had said he’d find her. He’d told her if he ever heard that whistle, he’d rescue her. A second wind lifted her head and churned her legs faster. “We have to find him.” Her eyes drank in the endless blue-gray peaks spread all around them. He could be anywhere. Who knew where that whistle had echoed from…
The shrill sound pierced the air again. They were getting closer. Jessa skidded down a steep section of loose talus, losing her balance and flailing to catch herself.
Lance held on to her arm. “Take it easy. Don’t need to do two rescues.”
She ignored him, ripping out of his grip. “He’s in trouble,” she wheezed, her heartbeat throbbing in her temples. Luis was in trouble and he was alone.
Another whistle veered her to the left. She slowed to pick her way down a boulder-strewn slope. So close. It sounded so close…
“There!” Lance darted in front of her and pointed toward a huge rounded boulder.
She strained to see.
Luis stood near it, still and alert.
“Are you okay?” blared from her mouth with surprising force, given how she could hardly breathe.
The man spun and relief whooshed in, filling her lungs, calming that surge of adrenaline. He looked like the same Luis, nothing broken, nothing bleeding. His white hair was bedraggled, but other than that, he seemed fine.
Lance made it to his father before her. “What the hell, Dad?” Now he did seem to run out of breath. And he looked pale, too. Rattled. Like maybe he’d been as worried as her on their little sprint down here.
Jessa doubled over to catch her breath.
“What’s the problem, son?” the man asked, clearly clueless as to how worried they’d been.
“What’s the problem?” Lance’s tone inched toward a yell.
“We thought something terrible happened to you,” Jessa broke in, before Lance could jump all over him. “You were gone all night. And no one knew where you went.” She wasn’t yelling, but a bit of a whimper snuck through. If anything had happened to him—
“Course I was gone all night,” he said, as ornery and gruff as ever. “I have every right to go out and camp on my land whenever the hell I want.”
Jessa cut a glance at Lance. His face had gone red. Molten.
“The hell
you do,” he ground out. “It’s not safe for you to come out here alone.”
Now that she agreed with. What if her father had been out here alone when he’d had the heart attack? They never would’ve known what had happened to him. They may have never found his body. She pressed the back of her hand against her lips before a sob snuck out.
Luis seemed to assess her with those watery gray eyes. “I didn’t mean to worry anyone,” he said more gently. “I’m fine. Everything’s fine.”
“Then why were you whistling?” she whispered, still battling how the memories of her dad and her relief at seeing Luis swirled her in a fog of emotion.
“Can’t find the damn ATV,” Luis said, gazing around. “Woke up at sunrise and been lookin’ for it ever since. Left it parked right here. I know I did. Someone must’ve taken it.”
“No,” Lance snapped, his body rigid. “Actually you didn’t leave it right here.”
The worry that had just started to dissipate clouded Jessa’s heart again. “You parked it where we always park,” she said, studying him, searching his eyes for a sign that he remembered. “Over on the east side of the mountain.”
Luis simply blinked at her. He looked…confused. Disoriented. And she’d never seen him that way out here. He always knew where things were, which direction was which, how to get from one point to another. On all of their hikes, he’d been the one to lead her.
“This is the east side,” he insisted, with a stubborn lift to his stubbled jaw. “I ought to know. This is my land.”
She glanced at Lance, but he simply shrugged it off. His head tilted to the right. “Topaz Mountain is right there, which means that way is east. You must’ve gotten turned around.” Whirling, he pointed toward the ridge. “The ATVs are this way. Let’s go.”
Luis stepped off, too, hiking up the backpack that held all of his gear and passing his son as though he had something to prove. Jessa followed behind, watching him, and something was definitely off. His feet seemed to be stumbling more than usual. Was his balance unsteady?
Luckiest Cowboy of All--Two full books for the price of one Page 33
