When Tomorrow
Never Comes
By: Raven K. Asher
Other Books By: Raven K. Asher
“Barely Alive” (The Story of Alexis Rose) Book 1
“Running Scared” (The Story of Alexis Rose) Book 2
“Dead End” (The Story of Alexis Rose) Book 3
”The Complete Story of Alexis Rose” (Books 1-3)
“Losing Levi”
“Stolen” (When Worlds Collide and Stars Align)
“The Hidden Angel” (The Angels Evermore) Book 1
“Damage Me”
“Colton Clark” (A “Damage Me” Novella)
“Eden One, Season One” (Episodes 1-12)
“Alone” (Among the Dead Trilogy) Book 1
“Escape” (Among the Dead Trilogy) Book 2
“Bound” (The Onyx Wolves) Book 1
“Broken” (The Onyx Wolves) Book 2
Text copyright © 2014 Raven K. Asher
This publication is protected under the US Copyright Act of 1976 and all other applicable international, federal, state and local laws, and all rights are reserved, including resale rights: you are not allowed to give, copy, scan, distribute or sell this book to anyone else.
Any trademarks, service marks, product names or named features are assumed to be the property of their respective owners, and are used only for reference. There is no implied endorsement if we use one of these terms.
Any people or places are strictly fictional and not based on anything else, fictional or non-fictional.
Table of Contents
Other Books By: Raven K. Asher
Table of Contents
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Losing Levi
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Prologue
Snow cascades down around me as I stand still, silent, as a soft hickory casket is slowly lowered into the cold hard ground.
A single white flake falls onto my eye lash.
It doesn’t distract me from watching as my heart disappears from sight.
He was gone forever.
I would never hear the soft sound of his infectious laughter and I would no longer feel the warmth of his breath fan over my cheek.
I felt so alone.
When the casket gently hits the bottom of the hole with a soft thud members of his family begin to step forward to grab a small handful of soil to toss into the hole.
I watch as they all file past with tears rolling down their reddened cheeks.
His mother stops next to me for a moment with her head bowed as her frail hand reaches out to gently touch my arm.
A moment later she continues on her way.
I hadn’t expected that much from her considering she had accused me for his death.
A dark shadow falls over me a few moments later.
I almost wish it was death coming for me, but it was someone much worse.
It was his brother.
He doesn’t make a sound as he moves to stand closer to me.
Bowing my head I force myself to stay strong in his presence. I had to stay strong no matter how much just having him next to me hurt.
It felt as if Cole was standing next to me and not Liam.
They had looked so much alike being that they had been identical twins. There were subtle differences though, ones that only someone that was close to them would see.
When he moves forward to take his turn tossing dirt into the hole I let out the breath I had been holding back in his presence.
Once he turns back around I bow my head again but not before I catch a glimpse of the hatred he held for me within his dark eyes.
Along with his mother he had blamed me.
This tragedy hadn’t been my fault though, it had been Cole’s. He had been the one falling into a pit of darkness.
It was something that I had thought I could save him from.
But in the end I couldn’t.
In the end he had left us.
He had left me with a deep hole in my heart.
Cole had abandoned us all.
Chapter 1
Dear diary,
I try not to miss you, but in the end I still do. I can still feel you with me some days. I swear I see you everywhere I turn. God, I don’t know if I can continue on…I love you.
“Come on, Evette, you’re going to be late.” Sally, my foster mother, calls out from downstairs as she had done every day for the past three years that I had been living under their roof.
Today that was all going to come to an end.
I knew it.
I had seen the looks she had given me at the dinner table the night before.
It was a look that I had gotten many times over the years, being passed around from one foster home to the next.
Right now she was trying to get me off to school but I wouldn’t be coming back.
It was all an act.
She would box up my few belongings and then she would hand them over to my social worker before they picked me up from school at the end of the day.
Who could really blame this family though? I had put them through hell over the past two months since Cole’s death.
They had tried.
I could give them credit for that.
Unlike most of the homes I had been in the Moores had truly loved me, at least that’s what I had believed.
Now, I wasn’t so certain.
Sighing softly I stand in front of my mirror while brushing my soft brown hair behind my ears.
My blue eyes were bloodshot from lack of sleep.
And my clothes were wrinkled but I refused to wash my shirt, it still smelled like him. I could not bring myself to erase the only things I had left to remind me of him, I wouldn’t.
After a moment I gather my book bag before shoving my diary into it along with my photos of Cole and me together.
There was no way I was going to risk having them left behind.
Zipping my bag up I slip on my shoes and then toss my bag over my shoulder while forcing a smile to form on my lips as I exit my room.
Downstairs I walk into the kitchen, stopping at the doorway.
Sally, Evan, and their two children Amber and Nathan, who were just a few years younger than me, look up at me with sad eyes before they all quickly look away.
“Sit down and eat something, Eve.” Evan grunts as his eyes linger on me.
I nod and then sit down in my normal seat before placing a few pieces of bacon down on my plate to eat.
Everyone sits quietly as we eat together for the last time.
I keep my eyes on my plate as I eat, refusing to see the sadness in their eyes for another moment.
I couldn’t handle it.
Not from the people I had gotten so close to.
They had been like a real family to me. I would even go as far as saying that I loved them. I truly loved them.
My heart ached knowing that I would never get to see them again.
God, did it hurt.
When Nat
han and Amber finish their breakfast they rush away to gather their bags so that they could wait for the bus to come pick them up.
I close my eyes and hold back the sob that wanted to escape my lips.
“Eve, are you…” Sally trails off as I hold my hand up to stop her.
Lifting my head up I look at her. “You don’t have to act as if this isn’t the last time I’ll see you.” I begin as tears fall down my cheeks. “I know this routine too well.”
Evan sighs roughly as he places his newspaper onto the table beside his empty plate. “We think it will be better for you if you’re far away from here. You need to be somewhere where you’re not constantly reminded of Cole.”
I nod but grind my teeth together. “You mean I need to be somewhere where I don’t remind Cole’s family of what they lost.”
“That’s not it, Eve, and you know it.” Sally argues.
“They hate me and I don’t blame them. I hate me.” I reply harshly as I stand up from my seat and grab my bag.
“Eve, you can’t continue to blame yourself for what happened.” Evan tries to comfort me.
It wasn’t going to work though.
“How can I not blame myself? If I would have been two minutes earlier I would have been able to stop him. I could have saved him.” I reply softly.
“He was sick.” Sally replies gently. “He would have done it one way or another.”
I nod and then turn my head away from them. “But he still did it knowing that I’d be the one to find him first.”
Sighing softly I walk away from them only to stop at the doorway.
“I did see myself living here forever.” I whisper just loud enough for them to hear. “I love you, all of you, tell Amber and Nathan that.”
With those hard words I walk away leaving the sounds of Sally crying in the background.
I walk out of the front door and down the steps to the last one before sitting down.
Burying my face into my hands I begin to cry.
Life was so unfair.
I only stop crying when a loud horn pierces the normally quiet neighborhood.
Looking up I wipe my face as a dark blue sports car pulls out of the driveway across from ours.
It was Liam.
He backs it up until he’s directly across from me before his tinted window rolls down just enough for me to see his dark brown eyes and equally dark brown shaggy hair.
I wait for him to say something harsh to me but he remains quiet.
His eyes stare at me for so long I can’t help but look away. I couldn’t take the pain that was filling my heart with his brother’s absence.
After a tense moment he revs the engine before taking off down the road.
He and his family were never going to forgive me, and honestly I wouldn’t blame them if they didn’t.
I was a constant reminder of what they had lost, so maybe it was better that I would be leaving this place behind.
Maybe it would be better for us all in the long run.
At least once I was gone I wouldn’t have to face those stares filled with pity or the stares of hatred that I sometime had gotten from other friends of Cole’s.
Things would get better, I had to believe that.
The school day soon comes to an end.
Placing my books into my locker I pull out any papers that I wanted to keep and toss the rest into a waste basket beside me.
I had been right when I had predicted that a social worker would be here when the day came to an end.
He had been standing right outside the classroom when my name had been called out on the loudspeaker to be excused from my last class of the day early.
“Take your time, Evette. I need to signs some paperwork in the office but I’ll be right back.” Matt states gently.
I nod and smile at him sadly before he rushes off down the hallway.
So far he seemed a lot nicer than my old social worker had been.
He was young and looked to be somewhere in his mid thirties so maybe it was because he could relate more.
It gave me hope that maybe I wasn’t doomed to skip from one foster home to the next. Maybe he could find a new family that would actually want to keep me.
Out of nowhere Liam steps up behind me. “You’re leaving?”
I turn and nod. “The Moores don’t want me anymore.”
He sighs roughly as he glances away from me. “Nobody wants you around, Eve.”
I nod while biting my lip, knowing that it was true.
Over the years I had been told so many promises, of how families wanted to keep me forever, and each time I had believed them only to realize later on that they never intended to keep their promises to me.
Grabbing my chin suddenly, Liam gazes deep into my eyes.
It was a surprising gesture from him.
Closing my eyes I hold back my emotions as words flow from my lips against my will. “Can you just be him for a minute, I need him to kiss me one last time?”
Without hesitating Liam’s hands grip my hips just like Cole would have done just before his lips crash into mine.
Pain slices through my heart as we kiss.
My eyes open to see tears filling his eyes. They held so much pain and darkness in them I almost felt as if I truly was looking at Cole.
Pulling away slightly, Liam breaths out roughly as his tears fall. “Goodbye, Evie.” He whispers softly.
“Goodbye, Cole.” I reply back with emotion clogging my voice.
After a long moment Liam releases his hold on me and then turns to walk away, but before he leaves he pauses with his back still turned to me for a moment. “Don’t come back.”
He walks away without another word.
I watch him until his back disappears around the corner.
His words had hit me like a hammer but I couldn’t let them affect me, it was what I deserved after all.
I didn’t deserve what he had just done for me though.
Turning back to my locker I absently sort through the rest of my things before shutting it with a final click.
Grabbing my bag I walk down the hallway towards the main office before leaning against the wall with my head bowed, waiting quietly for Matt to walk out.
Thankfully the time rushes by and before I know it Matt walks out with a bright smile. “Are you ready to go, Evette?”
I nod and he motions for me to follow.
Walking slowly I glance back once in the parking lot to burn the image of this school into my memories along with every moment I had shared there with Cole.
In one window I catch Liam watching me.
Turning back around I leave it all behind.
A new life was waiting for me ahead.
Chapter 2
Dear Diary,
My heart hurts. Why did you have to leave me? I can’t go on, I just can’t live another day without you…I love you.
I wake up in a dark room with a piercing scream falling from my lips.
Clutching my pillow to my chest I close my eyes against the sudden onslaught of bright light as my newest foster mom, Julie, rushes into my room.
My newest foster dad, Jake, rushes in next with a baseball bat raised high in his hands ready to swing at any intruders.
He lowers it once he realizes there’s no danger.
Julie sits on the edge of my bed. “What happened to you, Evette? Why do you scream out every night like this” She whispers gently.
I stay quiet as I hold the pillow tighter to my chest.
This would be the final day for me in this house. I had woken them up far too many times like this and I had never once answered their questions
What was the point when they truly didn’t care?
This had been the sixth home I had been to in the last month alone.
I had been with an older couple at first.
I had nearly given them both heart attacks when I had woken that first night with them screaming. I couldn’t really blame them for sending me back the
next day.
After that I had been in the other homes no longer than a week and a half before they gave up on me.
My screams terrorized them.
No one knew how to handle me, even I didn’t.
No one had wanted a depressed and broken teenager to take care of, especially not one that would wake them up at random times every night.
“We can’t help you if you don’t talk to us, Eve.” Jake states as he sits down on the edge of the bed next to his wife.
They were such a sweet couple.
She had soft brown hair like mine and he had dark hair like Cole and Liam had.
Watching them was almost like looking into the future that could have been me and Cole. It was hard sometimes to see them.
“You’re only going to make me leave.” I whisper sadly.
Jake and Julie both shake their heads.
“We won’t do that to you, Eve. Both of us know how hard being tossed around in the system can be. No matter what happens here this will be your home. We aren’t going to let you go.” Julie replies.
“But…” I begin but stop as Jake stands to his feet.
“You’re not going anywhere. We’ve already filed for the adoption papers.” Jake admits.
My eyes go wide for a moment with utter shock. “Seriously, you don’t even know me.”
“We want to get to know you. We want to know everything about you, Eve.” Julie replies wholeheartedly as she reaches for my hand.
A sob falls from my lips as I move forward abruptly to hug Julie.
She doesn’t hesitate to hold me tightly as I weep into her chest.
Her hands smooth my hair down as she rocks us back and forth in a soothing motion. “Shhhh, Sweetheart. Everything will be better, I promise.” She whispers softly.
I wanted so badly to believe her words.
It was still just so hard to believe that they actually wanted to keep me.
They wanted to help me.
No one had ever cared like that.
Once my crying slows I pull back out of Julie’s embrace and wipe my tears away from my cheeks with the backs of my long sleeves.
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