Cracking it open, I stick my head out and look both ways, pulling the door the rest of the way open when I see the hall is completely empty.
“You’re good.” I signal, reaching out to grab her forearm just as she passes me.
She stops abruptly and hits me with a soft gaze.
“I don’t regret it. Even with all this.” I smile, laying a kiss to her lips before releasing her arm.
She gives me a heart stopping smile and then quickly takes off down the hallway, slipping inside her hotel room just a few doors down in the matter of seconds.
Letting the door go, I press my back to it seconds after it latches closed. Running my hands through my hair, I let out a long slow exhale, not able to fight the smile that pulls at my mouth.
No matter how bad I feel about lying to Gavin, nothing, and I mean nothing, could possibly taint the happiness fucking sprinting through my veins right now.
Fuck me.
This girl has me good.
I am so fucked...
Chapter Eight
Charlie
Slipping inside my room, I make quick work of changing into a tank top and yoga pants before heading into the bathroom to brush my teeth. My heart is pounding a thousand beats a minute as I splash my face with water, trying to wash away any evidence of where I spent last night.
Wiping my face dry with a hand towel, I catch sight of my wide eyes and flushed cheeks in the mirror and immediately start laughing. I don’t know if it’s because I’m so incredibly happy-giddy this morning, or if everything is just now catching up with me and all I can do is laugh about it.
Exiting the bathroom, I crawl up my bed and collapse down onto the pile of pillows that line the top. I close my eyes and let out a deep sigh, only able to give myself seconds to bathe in the afterglow of my night with Paxton before the door flies open.
“Where the hell have you been?”
I roll onto my back to see my clearly too protective brother hovering just at the end of the bed.
“What do you mean?” I play stupid because I’m not supposed to have any idea he’s been looking for me.
“This morning Charlie. Last night.” His irritation is evident in his tone.
“Um, not that it’s any of your business but I went down and played the slots for a couple hours last night.”
“So where were you this morning then?” His eyes narrow on my face, daring me to lie. I know that look all too well.
“Getting something to eat.” I give him the most annoyed look I can muster. “I woke up with a small hangover and needed something on my stomach.”
“Fuck, you had me worried sick.” He instantly relaxes, his shoulders sagging forward slightly.
“You need to get a grip.” I shake my head.
“Well fuck Char; I didn’t know where the hell you were. What would you like me to do?”
“I don’t know; trust that I’m old enough to take care of myself.” I roll my eyes, pushing into a sitting position.
“I do trust you.” His words cause the lingering guilt to resurface full force. “It’s other people I don’t trust. We’re in Vegas Char. I just need to know where you are so I know someone hasn’t snatched you up and dropped your dead body somewhere in the desert.”
“Seriously?” I roll my eyes again, not able to stop myself.
Leave it to my big brother to assume that I’ve been killed and dumped because I wasn’t in my room when he thought I should be.
“Don’t fucking look at me like that. It’s my job to make sure you’re safe.” He crosses his arms in front of his chest.
“No.” I shake my head, mirroring the arm crossing stance. “It’s your job to realize that I’m old enough to take care of myself and live your own damn life. I survived just fine on my own in New York. I think I can manage.”
“But now you’re here and if you think for even one second that I’m gonna drag you all the way to Vegas with us and then not make sure you’re safe, then you don’t know me very well at all. Look.” He pauses, dropping his arms and letting out a slow exhale. “I’m not trying to be some crazy over-protective big brother. I get that you’re all grown up now Char, I do. But you’re still my sister and the need to protect you will never go away completely. Just make sure next time you decide to disappear that you shoot me a text or something first, just so I know you’re good.”
“Okay.” I groan, flopping back down onto my back. “Now will you leave me alone and let me try to get a little more sleep.”
“Fine. But don’t forget you’ve gotta be up and ready to go in about four hours.”
“Yeah, yeah.” I roll into the pillows, throwing my hand in the air to wave him off.
I hear another deep exhale before the door to the hotel room opens and then latches closed just seconds later.
I didn’t actually intend to really go back to sleep but the moment my eyes close and the silence of the room engulfs me, I feel myself slipping away.
Visions of last night flood my mind as I teeter on the cusp of awake and asleep. Paxton. The way he touched me. The way he kissed me. The way he made love to me over and over again until neither of our bodies had the strength to go on.
I can see his face, his eyes, his smile. The way he held me close to his chest, whispering how beautiful I am, how good I felt in his arms, how he was never going to let me go again. I fell asleep to the sound of his voice and even now I’m not sure if I’ve actually awoken from the dream.
Certainly this can’t be real. There’s no way Paxton is finally mine. But even as I slip into unconsciousness I know it is. I can feel it. I can feel him. And I know that no matter what happens next I can handle it, as long as I have him by my side.
****
“You ready?” I smile at Kimber, fixing the sparkling tiara head piece that sits on top of her head—holding her veil in place.
“I think so.” She lets out a shaking breath and gives me a nervous smile.
“Relax.” I take her hands in mine, feeling more optimistic this afternoon than I have maybe ever. “You’re marrying an incredible man.” I reassure her. “He’s part of my family, and now so are you.”
Her eyes flood with unshed tears for the hundredth time in the last hour.
“Thank you.” She squeezes my hands before pulling me into a hug.
“Enough with all the mushy stuff.” Angel reappears through the door that leads out into the chapel. “You ruin your makeup and you’re on your own.” She playfully warns, wagging her finger at Kimber who releases me and steps back.
“They’re ready.” Angel stops directly in front of us, smiling widely at Kimber.
“Where’s Harlee?” Kimber looks around, shaking her head the moment Harlee stumbles through the door looking rather flustered.
Her royal blue halter dress, which matches mine and Angel’s, is cocked slightly to the side and her entire face is flushed crimson.
“Really?” Kimber laughs. “You couldn’t have waited until after I got married.” She teases, clearly knowing that Harlee was out doing god knows what with my brother.
“Gross. Can we not?” I tease, reminding them all that the last thing I want to think about is my brother’s sexcapades.
“Sorry girl.” Harlee winks at me. “Your brother...” She raises her eyebrows up and down suggestively.
“No!” I hold my fingers into my ears, shaking my head back and forth.
“Okay. Okay.” Harlee holds up her hands on a laugh.
“Stop harassing the poor girl.” Kimber scolds playfully. “Now someone get me out there before I puke.”
“You’re not going to puke.” Harlee steps around Kimber and straightens the back of her knee length, white lace dress, making sure everything is perfect.
She looks incredible of course. The dress is elegant enough to really highlight Kimber’s beauty, but casual enough to fit into the Vegas eloping wedding theme. She left her hair down, with soft curls falling over her shoulders and around her face. Her tiara veil and natural makeup pulls
the whole look together perfectly. She really is the definition of beautiful.
“Okay ladies. Let’s do this.” Harlee beams at Angel and then to me, ushering Kimber toward the door.
I’m so nervous-excited I can barely stand it. On one hand, I’m so happy for Decklan and Kimber. On the other, I’m extremely anxious to see Paxton for the first time since this morning. All afternoon the tension has been growing. The doubt has creeped in and lodged itself deep inside my core.
The moment the double doors open I spot Decklan standing directly at the end of the aisle. He looks amazing dressed in an all black suit, but in true Decklan style he’s left out the tie and his jacket is open. His normal unruly hair is combed back, and a wide smile is spread across his entire face. He looks like the happiest man on the planet. The thought alone is enough to cause my heart to swell in my chest.
Gavin is standing directly next to him. He’s also dressed in a black suit; only unlike Decklan he’s wearing a royal blue tie that matches our dresses. I spot Paxton next, standing just to the right of the two guys, wearing the same suit as Gavin, with a guitar slung over his shoulder. At that moment everything else seems to melt away.
I watch his eyes narrow in on my face and he gives me the sweetest smile before his focus shifts to the guitar. Pulling it around to his front, before I can even step fully into the room his fingers are working magically across the strings.
It’s hard to keep my eyes off of him as I make my way down the aisle, his incredible voice filling the space as he sings Marry Me by Train. I know it’s completely ridiculous and premature but in some weird way I feel like he’s singing it directly to me.
I’m enamored by his talent, by the way his words wash over me, by the way the sound of his voice causes my skin to prickle as I make my way closer toward him. Paxton is sexy enough all on his own. Strap a guitar on him and let him sing and he will melt the panties off even the most committed of women.
His talent is incredible. His sex appeal undeniable. He really is the epitome of a hot musician. Even knowing him as long as I have and hearing him play several times over the years, the sound of his voice still makes me weak in the knees.
Taking my place on the opposite side of the boys, by the time Angel steps up next to me I’m already fighting off the tears I feel welling in my eyes. Paxton singing this song only intensifies the emotions taking over me.
Harlee comes next, winking at Gavin as she slides in next to Angel and turns her attention to the back of the room. After a few long seconds, the doors open and Kimber finally appears.
Her eyes instantly lock on Decklan which pulls my gaze to him. I watch, for what has to be the first time ever, as a tear slides down his handsome face. In all the years I have known Decklan, I can’t ever remember a time where I’ve seen him openly display such emotion.
Looking back at Kimber, I see that she is also now crying, doing her best to keep her steps controlled when it’s clear all she want to do is run to him and throw herself into his arms.
She finally joins Decklan at the front of the room just as Paxton finishes his song. He slides the guitar off and sets it to the side before stepping up next to Gavin.
The remainder of the ceremony goes by in a blur. One second their exchanging vows, the next Decklan is kissing the bride. The whole ordeal takes all of five minutes and when it’s all said and done they are announced as Mr. and Mrs. Decklan Taylor.
We exit the chapel in a flurry of hugs and laughter, everyone so happy for the newlyweds that it’s hard to contain the excitement floating around the group.
Before I know it Decklan and Kimber are hugging us all goodbye and climbing into the backseat of a car that will take them to the airport. Kimber doesn’t know it yet but they will be on a flight to St. John is less than two hours’ time.
Taking one last look back at the small chapel that is now part of our history, I smile, for the first time in a very long time feeling like maybe, just maybe, everything will work out for me after all.
“Char, come on.” Gavin pulls my attention to where he’s standing next to the rental car, the door held open for me.
“Coming.” I quickly spin around and slide into the backseat next to Harlee and Angel.
My heart explodes in my chest when I meet Paxton’s eyes in the rearview mirror just as I settle in behind the driver’s seat. He holds my gaze for a fraction of a second before winking and then turning his attention forward.
I know it’s just a wink. Just a small stolen glance. But that one look is enough to reassure me. It’s Paxton’s subtle way of telling me that things have not changed since this morning. An entirely new onset of happiness floods through me and I turn to look out the window just as a smile takes over my face.
This has been an absolutely perfect day. Between the wedding, hearing Paxton play that beautiful song, seeing everyone so happy, and finally having hope of a future with the man I have loved since I was a child, I feel like nothing can damper my spirits.
For the first in my life I feel like the future I’ve always wanted is in my grasp...
All I have to do is reach out and take it.
Chapter Nine
Paxton
Charlie curls onto her side, nuzzling her face into my neck as she fights off sleep.
“I just want to stay here forever.” She kisses the base of my throat.
“Me too.” I admit, dreading the trip home later today more than I thought I would.
It’s been so incredible having Charlie in my arm’s these past two nights. I can’t imagine not being able to experience this any time I want. Unfortunately, Charlie is staying at her mom’s while she finishes school and I’m currently crashing in Gavin’s spare room since moving back from California.
It’s not like we can easily stay at either place together without raising some serious red flags. And while I have no intention of giving Charlie up anytime soon, I’m definitely not ready to make anything between us public just yet.
Honestly the thought of telling Gavin terrifies the shit out of me. Not because I’m afraid of him or anything, I’m more just afraid of what it will do to our relationship. Gavin is not just Charlie’s brother, he’s mine. And while a part of me thinks maybe he will be okay with the fact that I’ve fallen for his sister, the other part of me knows that he won’t take my lying to him and keeping this secret very lightly.
He will see it as a betrayal and that’s exactly what it is. I’m betraying his trust. I’m lying straight to his face. And at the current moment, I have his sister secretly hidden in my hotel room.
I have to get my shit straight, get my own place, and then figure out how the hell I want to address this situation. In the meantime, whatever happens between me and Charlie has to stay firmly between the two of us.
Charlie’s breathing changes, evening out to a slow steady pattern of inhales and exhales as she finally drifts off to sleep in my arms. I kiss the side of her head, wishing that things could be different for us. I want nothing more than to show this girl how much she means to me. I want to scream it from the rooftops and make sure every single fucking person on this planet knows who she belongs to. Having her finally in my arms after all this time and not being able to publicly stake my claim on her is a fuck of a lot harder than I thought it would be.
Trailing my fingertips lightly up and down her bare arm, I stare down at her beautiful face as she sleeps. Fuck, the things I’m risking for this girl.
Gavin and Deck are the only solids in my life; the two constants that have never changed throughout all of my family drama and bullshit. The fact that I’m lying to them both goes against every instinct I have.
Those two took me into their little group and embraced me into their family without a second thought. I was thirteen at the time. A pissed off rebellious teenager who’s mom shipped him off to live with his dad because she couldn’t handle him. I was all sorts of fucked up. And I was alone. But then again, I guess in a way so were they.
After Decklan�
��s brother died the bond between us became unbreakable. We held each other up when we couldn’t find the strength to support ourselves. Then Gavin’s father passed. That was hard. Tim Porter was a great man. I’m just thankful that Charlie didn’t come home for the funeral. It was hard enough seeing Gavin and Rosie in such pain. Seeing Charlie mourn him would have been more than I could bear.
Next came my mother’s illness. Things never really got any easier between me and my mom as the years passed. It wasn’t until my father remarried and moved to Texas, just after my nineteenth birthday, that I finally decided it was time.
It was a slow process. The years of absence had driven a wedge between us that I was certain I would never be able to overcome. That is until she got sick. Moving back to California at the age of twenty-two to take care of a woman who I barely knew wasn’t easy, but I couldn’t just let her suffer alone.
For months I did what I could to rebuild our relationship as I watched her wither away. Each day the light in her eyes would grow dimmer until some days she would barely even open them at all.
It seemed so unfair. I lost my mom years ago, only to find her again when her days left on this earth were numbered. When she finally passed just over a year ago, something in me shifted. I haven’t been the same since.
I spent nearly six months in California after she passed waiting on the house to sell. It felt weird handing it over to someone else, someone who didn’t understand the history or the woman who had called it home for so many years, but it also felt good to finally let it all go.
When I returned to Oregon just a few months ago, I took the first real breath I had taken in years. Something was missing while I was in California. It was apparent almost instantly upon returning that what I was missing was my family. My brothers. My best friends.
I let out a deep exhale, resting my chin on the top of Charlie’s head as I tighten my hold on her.
For the first time since my mother passed, I feel like I have something to look forward to. I’ve spent so long punishing myself for the wall I put between us during my teen years that I’ve felt too guilty to build a future with the inheritance she left me. Being my mother’s only child, I got everything. Not that I ever cared about any of that. But now I think I’m finally ready to use some of it.
Crazy Stupid Perfection (Crazy Love, #3) Page 6
