Turning to face her fully, he wanted to know if this was trick. He didn’t know if he was hearing things or if Austin had actually asked him to stick around.
“I miss you,” she said and broke down. “And I’m scared.”
“There’s nothing to be scared of, Baby. You’re in safe hands here,” He told her as he watched her start to cry again and he felt stuck to the ground, not wanting to go over and invade her space entirely when she wasn’t ready.
“You haven’t seen what I’m left with,” Austin told him and looked at him almost pleadingly. Her lip quivered, “I’m scared of the pain, and I’m scared of what I’m left with as a result of that house.”
Tyler felt his heart twinge in that instance and he went to sit on her good side. “You’ve really got nothing to be scared of, Sunny.”
“I’m scared no one will love me when I’m better,” she looked at him fearfully and petrified. “Even you.”
As the nurse came back in, Tyler leaned in towards her, “I will make you see just how much I love you and regret how I made you feel years ago. I will make you see that I love you, Austin. I will make you see how beautiful you are.”
Austin couldn’t help but smile as Tyler took her hand and gave her the truth of their future. She couldn’t deny that Tyler simply being here was making her see past the wounds. They were older, wiser, more experienced. She had faith in Tyler, he wasn’t a stranger, this wasn’t a fling – this was true love.
Tyler could feel Austin shaking; he could see how prepared she was for the pain, how she steadied herself to look away from the wounds while the dressings were changed. He, however, had to look. He had to see what that fire had done to Austin, but even he didn’t expect to see quite such an angry looking wound inflicted to Austin’s once pure skin.
Snapping back to reality, he looked at her and leaned in. “Hey Baby, remember that one summer, just after I got my license, we took off for your birthday. Hit the road and spent the night on the beach. You remember that?”
Austin nodded and smiled, “You told me you were going to love me forever that night.”
“And I’m still very much in love with you,” Tyler vowed to her in response. It seemed to take her mind off of the tenderness to her arm for a moment, but when he saw her squeeze her eyes shut and he heard the nurse apologize he knew he had to try harder.
As a tear fell, placing its trademark track, he knew he had to up his game.
“What about our first kiss? My seventh birthday and there was a clown. I found you in the tree house and we found out it was your brothers who had called the clown there to scare you. You then told me they had helped you because at long last you got me on your own and finally could give me my actual present.” He watched in elation as Austin relaxed some more. “Even at seven you were still able to steal my heart, Baby Girl.”
The memory worked for a moment, but it didn’t work as a permanent relief and Austin’s body became a stimuli of sensory pain. He leaned in and wiped her tears away gently, then leaned in further to kiss her with purpose. It was just like her father was here looking after her. Except, this time, unlike her father, Tyler was the one that kissed away the pain with memories, he was the one that caught her tears. This time she had the man who owned her heart looking after her like he used to, and he was the one that got her through this moment until it was over.
It didn’t take them long to find that separation didn’t change what was meant to be. Especially as the nurse left them be, telling Austin to sleep. Tyler lie down with her and wrapped his arms around her as best he could, regardless of her burns, and held her safe and protected to his body. His body seemed to communicate with hers as it always had and he was careful with her still fragile body.
“We can’t keep doing this,” she whispered to him suddenly breaking the moment.
“Doing what?” Tyler asked her, a little scared of the response.
Austin sighed, “Coming back to one another, it can’t be fair.”
Tyler thought for a moment to see if he agreed, but he didn’t. “Why not?” he asked her casually, “It feels so right.”
“You don’t really still love me,” Austin told him honestly and nuzzled into his chest a little to keep the tears away. “Surely you can’t?”
“Oh I can,” Tyler admitted to her truthfully. He found that this moment wasn’t about her loving him – that was set in stone – it was about his love for her. He knew they had to work on that and prove it to her. “And I will spend every day of my life fighting to have back what was perfectly mine when I became reckless.”
Austin could feel herself falling asleep and as much as she wanted to push Tyler to go home, she wanted him to remain here with her forever. “Six years is a long time for you to still feel the same.”
Listening carefully, Tyler could tell Austin was finally comfortable enough to sleep as her body got heavier and move relaxed in his arms. “Six years is a long time to feel the same and not have the object of your desire to love.” Moving to look at his watch, Tyler spoke softly, “Want me to leave before your parents get here so you can sleep?”
Austin shook her head and reveled in the comfort of having the formidable force of Tyler around her. She caved and accepted it instead of deciding to push it away. “Just stay,” she whispered her desire sleepily, “Stay right where you are.”
“Count it done,” he whispered back and lingered in the silence of Austin’s hospital room. It didn’t take him long holding her close to close his eyes and fall into an easy sleep with his entire world in his arms.
That was how Jane and Nicolas found their daughter – wrapped up in the arms of Tyler – the place where she was always at her happiest.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
THE one thing Austin hated most about waking up this morning, was having to see Tyler leave her. He had taken a call and promised her he would be back. Now, hours later, she had slept and woken up to find out she was finally allowed to sit up properly and feel less like a hospitalized victim. It was pushing her pain thresholds but, to be a little more competent made her feel like her recovery was on its way.
She had quickly found that Tyler had indeed been back, and the mere thought of him brought her paled lips to curve into a small smile. Now, as her hands ran over the old print of her yearbook, she found herself lost in the past – her burns even went forgotten. She was skimming through the pages, taking note of the ones that had colorful tabs to catch her attention.
When she had woken up, the yearbook was sitting on the table by her bed with her name and a little note on it. She had read it and smiled wistfully – “Remember how we got to being us – T”.
If she knew anything it was that he was trying to recapture her trust and heart. She knew it might take a while, but a part of her hoped one day soon it would all make sense. One day she hoped to wake up and she would know where she belonged. Six years of no real family had rendered her a trapped soul. She shielded herself from things that would potentially hurt her and she knew she had to release that insecurity.
She had to smirk at the pictures of her and Tyler that were in here. They really were the ‘it’ couple. She missed having that status, she missed having the solace of his arms when she was feeling under the weather and wasn’t being herself. She missed being needed by him when he was ill, or when his old shoulder injury played up and he needed her assistance. She just missed him.
That caused an entirely new swirl of questions to arise.
Did Natasha sleep with him when he had a fever? Did she give him a massage when his shoulder locked and he was in pain from the same old injury? Did she stay up with him when insomnia hit? Was she the one that would run out into the rain and kiss him in the middle of a storm if she wanted another goodbye? Was Natasha the girl that now made love to him in the rocks of Point Arena cove?
Austin selfishly hoped not.
Looking down at the photo of the three of them, she guessed she wasn’t. Natasha wasn’t really the type that in
vested time in other people. She was always the one that was self-absorbed and made herself a priority with anything in life. She couldn’t be the type of girl that made Tyler know how much of a priority he was in her life. She hadn’t really shown that in the months that Austin had been back so that meant she was still the selfish individual she had grown up as being. Why would that change?
Then again, that could just be wishful thinking on her behalf.
Pushing that thought back, Austin shifted so she was more under the artificial light of the overhead lamp and continued to relive her past. The time before it all went wrong. She looked at old pictures of when they were at football matches, moments from projects, classes, extracurricular activities. There were pictures from lunch breaks and revision classes. Club shots and the yearly group photos - everything that high school was built upon.
The pictures that Tyler had pointed out were ones of them in the bleachers at their old school, pictures that the student body had collected over time and made a collage of. There were ones of her on her own, ones of them together, some with her and their other classmates. In all of which he had mentioned how bright her smile was above everyone else’s. He spoke of how her eyes were brighter than any of the others, or how she was the most beautiful girl.
As she neared the end of the book, Austin felt surreal. She felt like she was back in school, there being loved and made to feel beautiful, giving into the realization that there was one man that was always going to love her.
Sighing, she turned the page over and found that she was the end and reality dawned back in. She got caught up in the remembrance of things past and forgot about the dreadful truth of the present. She forgot about the miscarriage, about running, about being unwanted, about the fire and she forgot about the pain. She only remembered those happier times.
As the presence of the time washed over her, she was almost swallowed whole by the predicament she was caught up in. Did she recapture a long lost love or did she let him go for good?
That question seemed to be answered for her.
On the back page was a new message, one that made her eyes water – “Maybe we need to make a new yearbook? One for our future. T.”
***
Finding herself growing concerned by the silence filling the room, Austin just stared at the door, waiting for something to fill the doorway with their welcome and give her a moment to take just forget her thoughts. Waking up and still being alone wasn’t doing much for her morale. She had no idea at how much time had passed especially with the nurses constant and consistent monitoring.
She yawned for the umpteenth time. She was wondering on a grand scale of things – how was the house? Was it just a carcass of its former glory? How was Tyler dealing with the stress of insurance claims and seeing the house? How was he dealing with his ex-fiancées both being let downs? How was she going to deal with things when Natasha was free on bail? Because knowing Diane, that bail money would be paid somehow. And one of the questions that she had on a loop – when the hell was she going to get free of this place?!
“Don’t think too hard or you might burst a vein,” Dean’s voice broke the silence in the room. “That might be just a bit too messy.”
Austin looked at her brother and smiled gratefully that company had arrived at long last. She knew it wouldn’t be long before the cavalry arrived and she wouldn’t be so bored and maybe, just maybe, they might wear her out enough to sleep away the exhaustion.
“Mom sent over breakfast,” he said holding up a box as he entered the room. “She’s just got some errands to run and she’ll be here. Everyone’s at work trying to get some more time off.”
“Sounds good to me,” Austin said and shook her head as Dean passed a plastic tub her way. “I’m not that hungry though.”
Frowning, he placed the box on the table and sat down on the bed, “What’s up?”
“Nothing,” she told him honestly, “Well nothing bad. I just haven’t slept a lot and food isn’t a top priority at the moment.”
“What is?” Dean carried on questioning.
Austin looked at her brother, “When am I going home?”
Sighing, Dean ran a hand over his forehead, “I know you wanna get home, Aussie, I do but until the doctors are satisfied with the progress of your recovery, you gotta stick this out.” He dropped his hand and looked at her and gave her a smile. “You know they wouldn’t imprison you unless it was for a good reason.”
“I know,” Austin responded nonchalantly. “I just get lonely and a little too into my head space.”
“So I can see, sis.” Dean returned the comment as he noticed the obvious, “How exactly did you survive six years without us to knock you out of this funk?”
“Became a workaholic,” she chortled at him lightly and put her arm up to her shoulder in a bid to calm the pain. She put her head back and when she brought it back down, her brother’s eyes, the same swirl of blue like hers, were staring directly her. Both orbs filled with so much twisted concern it made her feel guilty. “Pain meds are not touching it today.”
“Have you told a nurse?” Dean asked and as he saw the answer written on Austin’s face he let out an angry sigh. “I always hated you being the suffer in silence type of stubborn child.”
“I know,” Austin replied with a smirk. “But you love me all the same.”
Dean laughed at her, “Sure do, kiddo. Nothing’s gonna change that,” he said leaning in, “Unless you run away again.” He shot her a pointed look and saw her expression turn to pure shock. “Yeah, I said it. You disappear again and I will be after you faster than it takes for you to run. I will be watching you like a hawk baby sister.”
“Good thing I don’t really want to run away again eh?” Austin asked her brother casually and settled for a moment thoughtfully.
“What else is bugging you?” Dean asked her after a few minutes of silence as he decided to set all of the food out, hoping that seeing something as simple as fruit would coerce her to just eat a little.
Austin looked at Dean, “Tyler,” she murmured back and looked away for a moment of hesitation. “I just don’t know what to do about that area of my life.”
“You ever thought about just falling?” Dean asked as he picked through her bowl of fruit. He looked up at his sister, “You might just find that he’ll be there to catch you.”
“Is it just that simple?” she countered as she pondered on the same subject matter that was continually consuming her. “He held me last night and for once I felt like I was home at long last. I felt like I was nineteen, and I don’t know if that’s a good or bad thing, Dean. I’m scared to give him my heart so quickly and then be left sitting around like I did. I don’t want to be in that place again because it broke my heart; it was lonely and scary and look how it ended.” Austin told him in a hastened fiery rant, she hadn’t breathed and refused to acknowledge the straggling tears as they dropped from the corners of her eyes until the last question fell from her lips. “Do I trust him so easily with my heart again?”
Taking a deep breath, Dean smiled, “I’m guessing he left that here?” he asked pointing to the yearbook as it sat on the other side of Austin. He watched her nod, “And who’s the man that so easily arrested his fiancée when the truth came out?”
“Tyler,” Austin muttered back.
“And who’s the man that kissed you the first time you were together after six years?” he asked and saw her shocked look, “I saw it, and so did Tom and Sienna actually. Beside the point though. Who was it?”
“Tyler,” Austin replied ashamedly.
“Who was it that willingly flirted with you without even telling you he was engaged?” Again he got the same name retorted at him. “Who was it that bought a house with you to renovate? Said house being the one that you were going to buy six years ago?” he asked and Austin spoke Tyler’s name softly. “And who was it that, even after everything, willingly risked his life to run into a burning house?”
“That’s not a f
air question,” Austin said with a groan, “You and Tom did that too.”
“We’re family so, therefore, it doesn’t count.” He argued back and didn’t waver from his point in this chat, “Austin, you and I both know you want to give all in and have him. However hard you fight it, you know that when all is said and done, it will be him you want and it’s him that you think about. Even after everything.” Dean told her truthfully, he could see he was breaking her down and she was coming around to his way of thinking.
“Can you quit being the bad cop and just entertain me?” Austin questioned him quickly and pleadingly. She was trying her hardest to keep her emotions on lock down because right now she was about to burst into tears over the truth of the matter and she really didn’t want to cry anymore.
“I will if you eat breakfast with me,” Dean fought back at her comment and he smirked. “I’m your big brother; I’ll never stop being the bad cop.”
Austin groaned and accepted this deal.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
THE news came later that day that Natasha was very much free to roam Point Arena until her trial, much to the Pearson’s, and apparently the Armstrong’s, dismay. Both families had rallied around in the wake of the news and Austin’s room had been a buzz of activity ever since. After having the morning with just her brother, she was now overwhelmed with how everyone was trying to distract her. The only thing it did was have the opposite effect as Austin’s energy slowly dwindled away.
Apparently everyone noticed and most of them said their goodbyes. Now Austin was left with her brother, directly beside her, while her mother and Tyler’s sat together, waiting for the stronger dose of painkillers to finally numb Austin’s pain enough for her to relax and sleep.
A Fire That Burns Page 20
