by Lila Kane
“Lunch?”
She smiles, closing the book. “Yes, lunch.”
“I never sleep this late.”
“You needed it.”
“We have a lot to do,” I say, turning for the door.
“And it’ll get done. Willow, wait.”
I turn back, surprised to see her looking uneasy. Her eyes swarm with emotions and questions and worries, but all she says is, “We need a solution.”
“Isn’t that what you’re working on?” I ask, trying for a smile.
It comes off tight, and is returned with a grimace from Cheyenne. “Yes. But it’s…” She walks around the table and shakes her head. “I’m thinking something that keeps us as far away from Kane as possible.”
Staying away from Kane sounds wonderful to me. And also useless. How are we going to stop him if we can’t get near him? Call him on the phone and politely ask if he’ll stop terrorizing the town? If he’ll be a good vampire and go on his way?
“I know.” She sighs. “How, right? But after last night…”
“He doesn’t have Morgan anymore.” My gaze slides to the door and I lower my voice. “He doesn’t, does he? She didn’t escape in the middle of the night or anything?”
“No.” When she sees how uneasy I am, she steps forward and reassures me again. “No, Willow, whatever Logan did worked. And he talked to her again this morning.”
“What did he say?” My stomach won’t stop churning now. I don’t want Logan talking to Morgan. I want him as far away from her as possible. I know how dangerous she can be.
“He just made sure she knows whose side she should be on. That Kane’s a psychopath. That we’re her friends.”
I laugh at that. “Friends. Sure.”
“Believing that has stopped her from hurting any of us so far, right? So, we’d better keep up the ruse until we can figure out a plan.”
Rubbing my hand over my chest, I nod. “A necessary evil. I get it.”
She sighs. “You don’t have to like it. I don’t. Her tendencies for betrayal are already rooted in her. That’s why we need to keep her away from Kane.”
“And when she doesn’t contact him?” I ask. “Then what? He might already be suspicious. Especially after last night. He probably wants to know what kind of damage her spell did. And he knows you guys rescued the vampire from his hotel room. He’s going to retaliate.”
Cheyenne rubs a hand over her eyes and leans against the edge of the table. “I know. Which is why we need to figure out something fast. And I don’t think confronting him is the solution.”
“Then what’s the solution?”
She bites the corner of her lip, debating.
“Tell me,” I say.
“A spell.”
“I thought that’s what we were doing. We got Morgan here for a spell. To put everything back to how it was before.”
“Which carries risks. Myra, for one. Also, we won’t know if it’ll work–”
“Then we’ll do a spell to take away everyone’s powers. Then Myra will be fine and Kane can’t hurt anyone anymore.”
“Again, will that work? Not only that…how do you think Kane’s going to take it? He might not be as fast or as evil if he’s not a vampire anymore, but that won’t stop him from being angry. Maybe trying to hurt you or Myra or any of us. Then what? None of us will have powers to defend ourselves, but we could still be in danger.”
I lift my hands in a surrendering gesture. “Then what? What are we supposed to do?”
She lifts her eyebrows and a dozen thoughts hit me at once. I blurt out the first one that comes to mind. “Kill Kane.”
“That’s one option,” she whispers.
“You mean, I’d kill Kane, right? Because I have the blue fire. I might be the only one who can stop him.”
“I said that’s one option. There might be another one–and this one means we won’t have to confront Kane at all. At least not right away.”
The look on her face says she doesn’t want to tell me, but she has no other choice. “It’s…an idea. You have to keep an open mind.”
“Tell me,” I say again, even more nervous the longer she doesn’t answer. “Cheyenne.”
“Go back.”
“What?”
“You go back to before all this happened. Kind of like erasing everything that happened before you came here.”
My mouth opens but nothing comes out.
“I know,” Cheyenne says. “It’s…a stretch.”
“You mean like…a do-over?”
She straightens and begins pacing. “Yes. Like a do-over. You’ll go back to before this all started. And…fix it.”
“What do you mean I’ll go back?”
“I mean, you’re the witch with enough power to pull off the spell. You can get help from the others, but it’s you. You’re the one who has to do it.”
I shake my head, not understanding what she means. “That doesn’t…go back how far? And then what? Just come here and talk to you guys about helping me–”
“Not that simple,” she says. “We won’t remember–”
“Wait, what?” A sick feeling settles over me. “You won’t remember? None of you?”
“It’ll be like we never met before, because we won’t have.”
“You won’t remember me?” I repeat stupidly.
“No.”
The word has such finality to it, I can’t speak for a long moment.
“Like I said,” she murmurs, “it’s an option. But I haven’t thought of a better one yet.”
Like her, I start pacing. Toward the window and back. They won’t remember. That means Logan won’t remember me. That means…I reach up to squeeze the ring he gave me. We won’t be engaged. We won’t be in love. Or I will be, but he’ll have no idea who I am.
“It’s a huge step, I know,” Cheyenne says, “and one you can’t take lightly. But we’re running out of time.”
She starts to say something but we hear voices in the hallway. “Let’s not tell anyone else yet.”
I nod, distracted, and follow her out to the hall. Of course, we can’t tell the others yet because this can’t be our best option. To change everything that’s happened. To rewrite the past. How is that even possible? And how in the world will everyone agree to it? I don’t even agree with it. Depending on how far back we go, I might not even meet Logan. Then what?
Then he’ll go on like normal, not knowing what we had between us.
The realization hits me hard as we see James pass by with concern in his eyes. “How are you?” he asks.
“Better,” I say quietly.
Ryan and Myra appear when we walk in the kitchen, and my heart twists. I’ve grown closer to them than I thought possible. They’re in love. If I go back, what will happen to their relationship? They might never know what they have…
And Logan…
He’s at the window, staring out to the gardens where he proposed to me. He turns and his smile kills me. It’s so painful, tears come to my eyes.
No, I can’t do it.
And he said so himself last night. He wouldn’t change how things have gone. He wouldn’t take it back.
So, how can I?
I walk straight to him and wrap my arms around his waist. His eyes meet mine for a brief moment, but I don’t hold the gaze, only bury my face in his shoulder to hide the tears threatening to spill.
“Willow,” he murmurs, lips close to my ear. “What’s wrong?”
I squeeze tight, as though it’ll keep him with me forever no matter what happens. If I could take him with me to the beginning, it might be okay. If he could be there when I face it down again, I might be able to handle it. But the idea of him never even knowing me is too much to handle.
“Willow,” Logan says again, easing me back so he can see my face. “What happened?”
“Nothing.” My throat clogs on the word and I have to try again. “Nothing. I just…”
I glance at Cheyenne. Her smile is sympathetic.
Her eyes don’t hold the same expression, though. It’s like they’re telling me, You’re going to have to make the choice. It’s going to be hard, but it’s for the greater good.
Morgan walks into the kitchen, mid-sentence. “…looks like she’ll be okay.”
Then she realizes everyone is staring at her and freezes. “What?”
I tense automatically, ready to defend myself and the others. Logan’s hand comes down on my shoulder, holding me close to him.
“What was that?” Logan asks her, offering a smile to distract her.
Morgan plops into a chair at the counter and swivels to face us. Her face is open, with none of the guile I saw there before. What did Logan say to her?
“I think she’s going to be okay—the vampire girl. Lucy. You must have gotten to her just before the change. Or maybe Kane didn’t have her feed on him enough. Either way…I’d say she’s out of the woods.” Morgan smiles at me with a nod. Like she’s reassuring me. “She’s lucid and she actually seems nice. I think by the end of the day, if things still look good, we can let her out of that room. Seems kind of mean to keep her in there anyway.”
I glance up at Logan as the words hit me. Morgan has no idea what we’re doing to her. Seems like she’d think it was mean to lie to her as well, but what choice do we have?
“That’s good,” Cheyenne says, breaking the silence. “We can use all the help we can get. Did she say anything about Kane or his plans? Anything that’ll help us know what he’s up to?”
Morgan frowns. For a moment, I think she’s mad at Cheyenne for asking the question. That she sees through all of this. But then she says, “I can’t believe he’s trying to turn people in town. I mean…your mom says he’s caused a lot of problems for you guys.” She looks at me with another smile, one that feels like she’s trying to fool me. “She’s still down there. She’s a really powerful witch–a great healer. You’re lucky to have her.”
With every word she says, the more the room seems to shrink around me. If Logan was able to change her mind, even her personality this much, what’s Kane capable of?
“I need a minute,” I mumble, turning to the door.
I fumble with the handle, growing more and more frustrated when it won’t budge. I jump when a hand closes over mine. Logan pries my fingers loose, undoes the lock, and opens the door for me.
I barely say a hushed thanks before slipping outside. I can tell he’s behind me. I hear his footsteps, soft and sure as we cross the grass, hear the quiet beat of his heart that reminds me that even though he’s a vampire, he’s still human. But mostly, I feel him. Like a string or cord, something binding us together. Linking us.
And, according to Cheyenne, one spell could snap that bond. It could tear us away from each other. But it could also save the whole town. It could fix this entire mess, or give me a chance to make it all right and avoid the problems that have been caused.
Logan catches my arm. “Willow, wait. Hold on.”
I spin to face him. “What did you do to her?”
His face goes blank, like he has no idea what I’m talking about. “I influenced her. I had to, Willow. I didn’t want to, but what choice did we have?”
I press my hands over my eyes, hating that he’s right. “I’m sorry,” I breathe, hearing the hitch in my voice and feeling the burn in my lungs. Even talking hurts. The emotion hurts. All of this hurts. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”
He pulls my hands away. “Willow, tell me what’s wrong. Are you still in pain? Should I get Faye?”
“No.”
“Then what? Cheyenne, or–”
“No, Logan. I just need…” I lift my eyes. “I just need you.”
He crushes me against him. “I’m here.” Then his hold loosens. “Am I hurting you?”
“No, don’t stop.”
But his touch is still gentle as he gathers me close. He smells like the first time we met. Of pine and secrets. Of danger. And he is dangerous. He stole my heart. Went after it with his charming smile and his words and determination, and finally with compassion.
“I’m not going anywhere,” Logan assures me in his soft, confident voice. And the more he says it, the more I’m convinced it can’t work.
“Something has to change. We have to fix this.”
Logan shifts, squinting against the light of the sun. “I thought that’s what we were doing.”
“I don’t think he’s going to wait.”
“Can we just…?” Logan steps closer to the hedges.
“Oh, sorry.”
I walk with him to the shade, my hand in his. He squints over at me. “Sorry. It gives me a headache.”
“You want me to do something?” I lift my hands. I could easily transfer some of my energy to him, to make the ache fade.
He shakes his head. “No. And I’d appreciate if you take it easy with the magic.”
We stop under a tree and turn to face each other. “That might not be an option,” I warn him.
“Taking it easy with the magic? Not an option? It’s sort of a necessity. Faye said you’re not going to have much energy.”
“And what about Kane?”
His jaw flexes. “What about him?”
“Like I said before. I don’t think he’s going to wait. We stole his vampire. Morgan hasn’t been in contact with him since last night–who knows when he expects to hear from her.”
“What are you saying?”
“Instead of waiting for him to come to us, maybe we should–”
“No.” Logan folds his arms, taking away the warmth of his hand. “We’re not going on the offensive. Not right now.”
I sigh, expecting this. “I don’t want to fight, Logan.”
“I’m not fighting with you. I’m telling you, this can’t happen. We’re not where we need to be as a team. We don’t have a plan, and sorry but you’re not ready.”
“I wasn’t ready last night either.”
He closes his eyes like it pains him to think about it. “Exactly my point.”
“Do you think he’s just going to sit around and do nothing? He’s making an army. He’s turning people in town. What happens when we’re surrounded by vampires? Then what?”
“Then we do the spell to stop them. Then we end this.”
“And then what?” I ask, remembering Cheyenne’s question from earlier. “Kane’s just going to shrug and walk away? He’ll be fine with us taking away his powers and his plan?”
“We’ll deal with it when the time comes.”
That comment makes my lips curve. I try to hold it back, but the smile comes out full force.
“What?” Logan asks, frowning.
“You. It’s…a month ago, you would have charged in and done what needed to be done. You wouldn’t have waited for the problem to come to you, you would have gone to it.”
His frown deepens. “Making fun of me right now is probably going to start that fight you didn’t want.”
“I’m not–no, that’s not what I mean.” I reach out and touch his cheek. He looks like he wants to pull away, but holds his ground, his arms still crossed. “I’m just saying, you’re different. In a good way.”
“I’m trying to take care of you, Willow. That’s what people do when they love someone. I can’t be the same person I was. Not with you. Being reckless and–and like the old Logan–means I’m being reckless with you, and that’s not an option.”
The words take my breath. “Logan,” I whisper.
“I love you. God, it’s crazy and it doesn’t even seem to make sense from the people were. After what’s happened. But it is. It’s real and it’s there, and nothing can change it.”
Even if I went back and took it all away? Maybe we’d still find each other. Maybe I’d find him and we could still have something.
“We’re running out of options, Logan. More people are going to get hurt. Kane’s going to get stronger. We don’t have the luxury of waiting until we feel like it.”
Even in his struggle for
patience, his hand is gentle when he brushes his thumb on my cheek. “Not until we feel like it. Until we’re strong enough to do something about it.”
“And then?” I ask quietly. “And then you’re okay with facing him and ending this if that’s what it takes?”
He shifts on his feet, and I can tell he’s not okay with that at all. “We never said anything about facing him. We talked about a spell. Now that we’re sure Morgan is on our side, we can do that spell. When you’re strong enough.”
I don’t have the heart to argue with him anymore, or to tell him that the spell might not work. Or we might not make it to doing the spell if Kane shows up. He’s doing what he feels like he has to, just as we’ve both done in the past, right or wrong. Good or bad.
“Later tonight,” I start.
He shakes his head. “Tomorrow night.”
I frown. “You don’t even know what I was going to say.”
This time he smiles. “Yes, I do. I want you to talk to your mom, and have her make sure you’re okay. And then tomorrow, if she thinks it’s safe for you, we’ll do what we need to do–whatever that is.”
I consider this. Tomorrow feels like a world away. Probably long enough for Kane to cause more problems and influence more people from town. To bite and create and make this even harder.
“Tomorrow,” I say. “At the latest.”
“If your mom thinks it’s safe,” he qualifies, and then kisses my temple. “Then tomorrow.”
I sigh. “Okay.”
He clasps his hands around my waist. “Thank you.”
I want to tell him he shouldn’t be thanking me, because most likely things aren’t going to go according to plan. They never do. I want to tell him we have a back-up plan, but that means taking away everything we’ve established, and I don’t have the heart for that either. So, I hug him in return and keep it all to myself.
“In the meantime,” I whisper.
“In the meantime, you stay close. You stay safe.”
“And we try to figure out the spell.”
He leans back. “Which means you’re going to have to work with Morgan.”
I grimace. “I know.”
“Can you do it?”
“I have to.”
“I love you.”
