Owen approached beside me, astride his copper horse. “Off we go.”
I smiled, trying hard not to let it reveal my anxiety. Taking in a deep breath, I loosened my hold on the reins slightly and set off at a nice slow pace.
After a few minutes of this, I grew more comfortable, and let the reins a little looser. Eve sped up to a trot, the brisk midday air picking up speed as it flew past my ears. It sounded like old memories of time spent with my father.
Owen turned his head and flashed me a smile. “Are you enjoying yourself?”
“Very much,” I said.
One side of his lips curved upward in a daring smile and he looked at me out of narrowed eyes. “Would you dare go faster?”
My heart fluttered with a mix of emotions. Excitement, fear, anxiety, bravery, and boldness all waged for supremacy within me. Together, they reached a stalemate. The resulting action was me dropping the reins and letting Eve have her head. She sprang into a furious gallop and we streaked past Owen in a blur of green on black. And I was fairly certain that I shot him a mischievous grin before I did.
I heard his laugh and the brisk hoofbeats of his horse as they picked up speed. Exhilaration took over my senses and I threw my head back, letting the wind fly past my face, through my hair. This time, it sounded like freedom.
The sound of hoofbeats grew nearer behind me, and so did Owen’s laugh. Something flared inside of me. With him approaching close behind me, this suddenly felt like a race. And if it was, then I had to win. We were heading straight for the woods at the edge of the property, which I assumed was the decided finish line. Eve was giving it her all, her head borne down in acceleration, her black hooves barely skimming the grass as she ran. I couldn’t remember a time that I had ridden so quickly, or been so daring.
The woods were within our grasp now, and although Owen was close behind, I could tell that Eve would win. She showed no signs of exertion and flew onward with the same determination that I felt within myself. With a final, unexpected surge of speed, we slipped past the grass and into the trees.
I pulled back on the reins, slowing to a gradual stop. My breath came quickly and my heart was racing, as if I had been the one running. I couldn’t stop the laughter that I felt rising in my chest from bursting out of my mouth.
Owen and his horse bolted through the trees and came to a stop beside me. He wore an expression that was half bewilderment and half admiration. “I have never seen a lady ride so fearlessly.”
I patted Eve’s neck. “She is amazing.”
“She is.” He nodded in agreement. “Horsey isn’t as quick as he was in his younger years. I knew he would be unable to compete with her.”
“I would be inclined to blame the rider,” I said in a light voice.
Owen raised both eyebrows at me with a laugh. I threw him a smirk and turned Eve toward the lawn. I could hear him laughing behind me as he caught up to me on the grass. He was probably as surprised as I was by my choice of words.
Peter and Charles came into view, and despite our distance, I could hear their giggles clearly.
“It seems they are enjoying themselves,” Owen said with a chuckle.
“Indeed.” I laughed. “Anything that will keep them out of trouble.”
His smile grew. “No young boy is truly a young boy if he doesn’t get into some trouble.” His words rang with familiarity.
“You sound like your grandmother,” I said, rolling my eyes.
“My grandmother is a very wise woman.”
I fixed my gaze forward, watching the delighted expressions on the faces of my darling brothers. Grandmother and Owen were completely right. No matter what could be done to improve my brothers’ behavior, Aunt Ruth’s wicked intentions wouldn’t be satisfied. It was impossible to alter the natural inclinations of a young boy to the extent that Aunt Ruth desired. Their behavior could be adjusted, yes, but they couldn’t lose their mischievous spirits entirely. And quite frankly, I didn’t want them to.
Owen’s voice broke into my thoughts. “I don’t wish to neglect my responsibility any longer. I will start by teaching them the basic rules of being a gentleman.”
I was puzzled for a brief moment, but then remembered that Mrs. Kellaway had charged him with the responsibility of training my brothers—something that I had not been very happy with. But now that Owen had proved himself to be a bit less horrid, I felt guilty that this responsibility had been thrust upon him.
“You really don’t have to. I can handle it,” I said in a brisk voice.
He flashed his warm, easy smile. “I have no doubts as to whether you can handle it. I am sure that you can. But I want to help.”
I maintained the direction of my gaze at my brothers straight ahead. I didn’t like receiving favors from people without being able to repay them somehow. It made me feel like some kind of thief. And with accepting help came feelings of inferiority and helplessness. “You must be very busy with your profession. I don’t want to intrude on your time.”
I caught a glimpse of him out of the corner of my eye. It looked like he was shaking his head. “No, Annette, you are completely missing my incentive. I don’t think my spare time could be spent in greater pleasure than if I could spend it with you. Helping your brothers will only give me greater reason to claim your time more often.”
My face grew warm and I dared a small glance at him. He was looking at me through friendly, persuasive eyes. I had to admit to myself that I enjoyed his company too. Although he could be very teasing and somewhat flirtatious (as I was beginning to discover), I had seen that he could still be kind, thoughtful, and friendly.
I sighed, aiming for nonchalance in my voice. “Very well. But please, tell me how I can repay you.”
He cast me a look of exasperation. “I don’t desire payment.”
“Please.” I waited, considering the thoughtful expression emerging onto his face. After a few moments of silence, Owen turned his head to me with a triumphant grin. His expression surprised me. What had I just committed to?
“Fine,” he said. “I will tell you how you can repay me.” He grinned mischievously and his voice dropped to a whisper. “With knowledge.”
My brow contracted in confusion. “Knowledge about what?”
“You.”
My heart sunk. He already knew far too much about me. But I had asked him for his payment request, so I couldn’t turn back now. I would just have to lie about whatever knowledge he wanted. “What about me?”
Owen studied my face for a brief moment, his eyes squinting in thought. “For every improvement I help make on Peter and Charles, I get to ask you a question of my choosing. And you must answer honestly.”
I started sweating. This was not good. Why did I insist that I repay him? Why had I not seen this coming? He had already discovered some things about me in the orchard that I didn’t want anyone to know, and now he had this deceitful way of discovering even more. I tried to look the least bit unsettled. “We have a deal, then.” I was proud of how steady my voice sounded.
He grinned in his triumphant way. I really needed to stop letting him win at so many things. It wasn’t something I enjoyed.
We met my brothers near the rose garden where we all dismounted. Owen tried to show Peter and Charles the rose bushes, but their eyes strayed to the horses more than was discreet, so we decided to take our ride a little longer.
While my brothers were talking and giggling, Owen and I talked and laughed as well. It was strange to me how much I enjoyed seeing his smile, and how easily he could make me laugh. It was different and exciting and completely rejuvenating. Perhaps he isn’t as atrocious as I thought, I reasoned to myself. I knew for a fact that I hadn’t laughed so much in my entire life as I had in the last few hours, and I could hardly believe how much time had passed when we were called in to change for dinner.
Owen held the door open, and as I passed him, he said, “Meet me by the water gardens tomorrow afternoon. And bring the boys.”
T
he evening was spent much the same, in smiles and laughter and, thankfully, a lack of mischief. I spent hours talking with Grandmother and Grandfather, and found that both had traveled all over the world. I enjoyed listening as they told me of all their adventures.
I spoke more with Owen too, and when I retired to my room that night, I could hardly remember what we had even spoken about. I could recall a few stories about his patients and childhood memories, but it all seemed to pass so quickly. I remembered more about how easy it was to continue our conversation, and how it felt like he had been my friend for much longer than a single day.
When I saw the pink rose in a vase on my writing desk, it seemed different. It seemed almost … harmless. I walked beside it and dared myself to touch one of its velvet petals. It was soft and gentle, not dangerous and hurtful. I was amazed at how much it had changed in such a short time.
Exhaustion began to set in and I crawled into bed with a smile that felt as unwaveringly wide as Grandmother’s eyes. I had no desire to dismiss it, so I let it melt slowly into my face as I relaxed. And just as I was falling asleep, I remembered having another lazy thought about Owen’s rose, how lovely it was, and how I might just keep it.
A
Chapter 9
The next afternoon, when we met Owen by the water gardens, the sky looked very likely to rain, stirring black and grey clouds. Owen consented to show us the library instead, and I was more than happy with the agreement. Aunt Ruth didn’t have a library in her home, and she had scarcely any books, so exploring the library would be most exciting. Owen showed me the dozens of shelves that were home to the largest and most grand collection of books that I had ever seen. A table was set up next to the fireplace and I couldn’t help but sit down in one of the cushioned chairs beside it.
I asked Owen to show me some of his favorite books, so he found Peter and Charles a few entertaining books to occupy their time, and took a seat beside me.
I listened as he read some of his favorite passages and poems from his favorite volumes. He had the sort of voice that is impossible to become bored listening to. He spoke with such expression and passion for the things he read about that I could tell that he valued his education immensely. He moved on to show me some of his father’s sketches from the many places he had traveled, including Italy, France, and Germany. He also showed me sketches of many different prospects of Kellaway Manor.
One sketch of a gorgeous estate caught my eye. “What’s this?” I asked.
“That is Willowbourne.” A long pause followed before he said, “My uncle’s.”
I studied the picture more closely. It was absolutely stunning. “Is it far from here?”
He glanced up from the sketch. “Actually, it’s quite close. Only fifteen miles away. I used to visit there often as a boy.” Something flashed in his countenance. Something sad and troubling that threatened to melt my heart. It surprised me, for I hadn’t imagined Owen could ever look so … broken.
“Have you not visited in a long while?”
He shook his head. “Not since I was seventeen.”
There was clearly something personal and painful associated with the place and I needed to know what it was. He had delved into my personal affairs yesterday in the orchard, so now it was my turn. “What happened?”
He fixed his gaze on the sketch for several moments. The library was silent except for the crackle of the fireplace and the quiet patter of rain on the window. Owen was silent for so long that I was almost convinced that he hadn’t heard me. But then he drew a heavy breath and traced his finger along the outside of the picture of Willowbourne. “It was my favorite place in the world. I spent every summer there, and as a young boy, it seemed that there was never enough time to explore the entire place.” He lifted his gaze to me, and I thought I could see a sort of sad longing in his eyes.
“I had a cousin who lived there. Theodore was his name. He was five years older than me, my brother Edmond’s age. But Edmond preferred to stay home, rather than come to Willowbourne. He had plenty of friends here, but I had none. Theodore was my best and only friend, and I looked up to him as the example of everything I wanted to be. He was so many things: a role model, a confidant, and the most trustworthy, kind, generous, and humble person I ever knew.”
Owen turned his gaze to the fireplace. “That last year I visited was when he died. Only a week after I arrived he fell terribly ill. But the physician that was called treated it as nothing. He might as well have pronounced Theo dead before he even made his lazy attempt to heal him.”
I watched with alarm the signs of bitter anger rising in Owen. His jaw was clenched and his hands were curled into fists on the table. “I had to watch my best friend die under the inept care of this indolent man who called himself a physician.” His words were clipped and harsh. He took a heavy breath. “Perhaps he could not have helped him. But if he had only tried harder … ,”
My mind spun. I knew that being a younger son, Owen would not inherit Kellaway Manor, so I assumed that was why he pursued a medical profession. But his reasoning seemed to run deeper than that. “If this man was so awful, what then drove you to become a physician?” I asked.
He was silent for a moment. “I suppose I felt the need to be what that man wasn’t. I needed to be the one that would have saved Theo. The one that wouldn’t have given up so easily and treated his responsibility with such flippancy. I would be the doctor that people could count on to truly care about their loved ones. A doctor that they could trust to try his hardest to save them.” When he finally looked away from the fire and at me, I saw everything. Everything from the pain in his heart to the determination in his eyes. “If I can do anything of importance with my life, it would be to become the man that Theodore was, and the physician that man wasn’t.”
There was something about the nobility of his words that made my heart skitter with admiration. And something about the sad twist to his smile that made my heart break in two. He understood the sorrow of real loss. He had lost someone he loved too.
There was no need for me to say anything. It would have somehow ruined whatever understanding was passing between us. So I sat back, content with the silence, and flipped through all the remaining sketches.
Peter’s voice from across the room made me jump. “Annette, will you read this story to me?”
I turned in my chair with a soft smile. “Of course.”
He grinned and hurried over to sit on my lap.
Charles jumped to his feet and stopped, disappointed, right in front of Peter and me. “Peter!” he exclaimed. “I wanted to sit there.”
Owen laughed and patted his leg. “What a blessing it is that I also possess a very comfortable lap.”
Charles walked over to him with a shy smile, and Owen hoisted him up onto his knee. Charles giggled and looked at Peter with such a smug grin that I had to laugh. “This lap is much more comfortable.”
Peter frowned. “It is not!”
“It is,” Charles said cooly.
Owen and I were laughing so hard at this point that I could hardly get the words out. “That’s enough, boys.”
Peter cast Charles one last scowl before I began reading. But when Peter pointed out that he had a closer view of the book, Charles wouldn’t stand for it. So Owen took the book and read for a while. Something melted within me as I watched Charles’s head nestled against Owen, and watched his eyelids flutter closed. There was finally someone else in the world that he could trust. And if Charles could trust Owen, maybe I could too.
At dinner, I could tell that Peter’s and Charles’s table manners were improving, and I was relieved (and shocked) again to see that another day had passed without any mischief from them. Certainly they had something up their sleeves, but at the moment, that didn’t matter to me. What mattered was the warm, buzzing feeling inside my chest—happiness. Something that I realized that I hadn’t felt for far too long. It was a feeling that I hadn’t thought that I had missed much. But I was wrong, and even wi
lling to admit it to myself. I hadn’t realized that I had been unhappy, until I felt again what it was like to be truly happy. The feeling was foreign and renewing, and I never wanted it to leave me.
During the next days that passed, that happiness carried with me like feathers on a bird’s wings. Each day I met Owen by the stables, or by the gardens, or in the library where we talked and laughed for hours. The passage of time continued to shock me, and I hardly noticed my brothers who picked roses and rode horses alongside Owen, or sat in the library with books while we sat and talked and sketched by the fireplace. I had been at Kellaway Manor for a week now, and it felt as if I had known Owen my entire life.
One night in the drawing room after dinner, Owen apologized again for neglecting his responsibility to the boys. I had nearly forgotten about the entire thing, but he insisted on giving them their first official lesson. He gathered my brothers over to the settee where we sat, and told them, “Meet me by the water gardens tomorrow afternoon.” He threw me a smile. “I suppose you may bring your sister.”
I was suddenly very nervous. The portion where Owen would teach my brothers was harmless, but the thought of my payment—his having free reign over my secrets, I certainly did not like. I didn’t even know if I had secrets, but if I did, I was sure that Owen could uncover any truths he wanted. He was good at things like that.
So to ease my worries, I told myself that I would just have to be better at hiding things about myself and telling lies if necessary; I was very good at things like that.
A
I awoke before the sun the next morning, hoping to have a chance to spend a portion of time in the library before my brothers awoke. I hurriedly dressed and made my way quietly to my favorite chair in the library. The entire house was silent except for the sounds of birds singing outside the windows. I curled my legs under me and picked up the sketchbook I had looked at a few days before. I couldn’t help but turn to the page covered in the beautiful sketch of Willowbourne.
Mischief and Manors Page 10