by H K Christie
“So there’s no way he did this to himself?”
“Not a chance. Once he had that ketamine in his system, he wasn’t going anywhere or doing anything on his own.”
“Did he suffer long?”
“No. I’d say it was peaceful and relatively quick due to the ketamine.”
“Well, that’s at least something. When will we have the final report?”
“Probably not until next week, but it’s definitely homicide.”
“Thanks, Doc.”
“Good luck, Detective.”
I waved as I hurried out of the autopsy suite. It was as we suspected, but it wasn’t exactly a sophisticated hit. Ketamine and insulin were commonly-used drugs and easy to get. Something rare would have been easier to trace, or at least would stand out - less of a needle in a haystack.
Maybe our perpetrator was a diabetic and had used his own stash for the kill. Or maybe the insulin came from a loved one or friend. The ketamine could’ve been obtained on the street or at a vet’s office. It was something to check out. I could call around and find out if there had been any break-ins in the last week or so where ketamine had gone missing. Now that we had the official ruling of homicide, I’d be able to question friends and family and request financial records. That was the good news. The bad news was I was also going to have to tell Kennedy that her father was murdered. Although it sounded like she’d already suspected as such, it wasn’t going to be pleasant.
In my car, I decided to share the news. I pulled out my phone. “Hi, this is Martina.”
“Hi, Martina, this is Hirsch. I just got out of the autopsy suite. Definitely homicide.” I explained the findings from Dr. Scribner.
She said, “As we suspected. Thank you for calling, Detective.”
“No problem.” It was nice to have someone to discuss the case with. Most people don’t realize that a detective’s job can be lonely. It’s not like on TV where everyone has a partner to investigate alongside you. In some ways, it was nice to be able to bounce ideas off of Martina and, if I’m being honest, it was simply nice to have someone to talk to about the case. She was definitely growing on me. She was sharp and had good instincts. She would’ve made a great cop.
“Oh, before you go, I wanted to tell you I received approval from my boss, and I’ll be flying to Pennsylvania on Sunday.”
“Great.” My phone vibrated. I removed it from my ear to see who was calling. Damn it. “Martina, I have to go; I have another call I have to take, but I’ll call you back.”
I clicked over to the other caller. “Hey, Dan. What’s up?”
“I have the final papers for you to review. Can you stop by the office today and pick them up? If not, I can send them overnight for you.”
“Ship them. I just caught a case.” And I wasn’t exactly in a rush to read through my divorce papers. I supposed I should be glad to be rid of my lying, cheating wife, but like most things in life, it wasn’t that simple. Love truly was blind, deaf, and dumb. I blamed myself for not seeing the signs. I had spent too much time hunting murderers and fighting office politics to put together the not-so-elaborate string of lies my soon-to-be ex-wife had concocted. All the ‘girls’ trips’ and ‘girls’ nights’ and yet I’d never met any of the girls, and none of the girls had spouses for us to go out with for a couples’ dinner.
“Okay, I’ll have my paralegal send them over.”
“Thanks.” I hung up the phone and contemplated my failures. My inability to tow the company line and do as I was told. The inability to be there for my wife when she had been lonely and wanting a partner, instead of a pissed-off detective who only wanted to hide away or work a case. I wasn’t a great husband. It was probably a blessing that we never had a child. We could both start over without having to develop co-parenting skills or have a lifetime of awkward events with our new partners and our shared child. I’d wanted children, but it never seemed to be the right time for me or for her. I was nearing forty, and it was looking like the idea of fatherhood was slipping away along with my youth.
I started up the car and headed back to the station. I had work to do.
I headed over to my sergeant’s office and knocked on his door.
“Hirsch, how’s it going? What did we find out about the Gilmore death?”
“Just back from talking with the ME. Definitely homicide.”
He nodded as if it’s what he’d also suspected. He cocked his head. “Do you think it’s strange that there was a murder next door to the cold case you just opened?”
I nodded. “I do.”
“Okay. What do you need?”
“Financials and work history, quick if we can. I’ll re-interview the daughter and get a line on family and friends to determine who had a motive to kill this guy. So far, it’s not very obvious. Just a lot of strange coincidences.”
“All right, I’ll make a few calls and try to get the records fast so you can get this case closed. Maybe it’ll help our stats. Can you get the forms completed today, before six?”
“Can do. I’ll work on them now.”
“Great.”
“Thanks, Sarge.”
I strolled back to my desk. Yes, it would be nice to have a solid closure rate at my new job, but there were definitely more important things than statistics. Like bringing closure to the family, to Kennedy. The one thing I didn’t like about this job, well, one of the main things I didn’t like about the job was that sometimes people lose sight of the human aspect of it all.
We’re supposed to be protecting and serving, not just closing cases for the sake of numbers and reports. I wanted to close the case because I wanted a family member to have closure. I wanted to find Donna Bernard to figure out what happened to her all those years ago and to bring her home to her family. I wasn’t in this job for the accolades or awards. I wanted to make a difference. I couldn’t help everyone, but to the ones I could, I knew it would mean the world.
I reached my desk and sat down. I supposed it was as good a time as any to give Kennedy a call and let her know we had some news on her father’s case and that I needed to do another interview. I slid the folder over and flipped it open. I picked up the desk phone receiver and dialed Ms. Gilmore’s number. The phone rang while my belly did flip-flops. I shouldn’t be nervous, but these types of calls were never easy. “Hello.”
“Hi, Ms. Gilmore, this is Detective Hirsch.”
“Hi, Detective Hirsch. Is there any news in my dad’s case?”
“There is. The medical examiner performed the autopsy today and we’ve deemed your father’s death a homicide. I’ll need to meet with you to go through some questions I have. Do you have time tomorrow or sometime over the weekend? I could meet you if that’s helpful.”
Kennedy didn’t speak, but I could hear the faint sound of a sniffle. Suspecting her father was murdered was one thing, but I think hearing the truth would be harder. To think that somebody would intentionally take away your loved one. Your one remaining parent. It was devastating. Hopefully, we would get answers for Kennedy, and soon.
18
Martina
I stared at the pink, frilly, heart-shaped box of chocolates that sat across from me on the dining table. For the Valentine’s Day party in her classroom, Zoey and each of the kids decorated heart-shaped boxes and filled them with the best chocolates in the Bay Area. She’d been talking about the party for weeks and I’d done everything in my power to attend, and I did. I mingled with the other parents while the third graders worked on their crafts. After Zoey finished the project, she skipped over to me with the box firmly in both hands. She lifted it up and said, “Mommy, I made this for you because I want you to be my Valentine today and always. So, will you? Will you be my Valentine?”
It took just about all I had in me to not tear up. I responded, “Yes, I accept the role of your Valentine,” and bent over and gave her the biggest hug she had ever received in her young life. I swear, when God took Jared, I suppose she knew what she was doing by lea
ving me with the brightest light that anyone could ever imagine.
I kept the cherished memory in mind now that she was driving me bonkers by running around the house, singing her favorite song at the top of her lungs. I let out a breath and called out to her, “Zoey, can you please keep it down? I’m trying to do some work.”
She skittered into the kitchen, where I sat at the table with the case file on Donna Bernard. “What are you working on? Is it something super important?”
“It is important. Did I ever tell you about my friend, Donna?”
Zoey stood stiff as a board, and her eyes widened. “No, please tell me about Donna.”
Zoey was a multi-faceted child. One of those facets screamed, ‘dramatic’. “Why don’t you have a seat and I’ll tell you about her.”
She pulled out a chair and perched herself on the edge. “I’m listening.”
I smiled at her. “Donna was my very best friend when I was growing up. We were inseparable.”
“Oh, like me and Kaylie?”
“We were just like you and Kaylie.”
“Is she coming over?”
I shook my head. “Nope. When we were teenagers, she disappeared. I never saw or heard from her ever again.”
She rested her chin on her tiny fists. “Where did she go?”
“Nobody knows. The police said they think she was a runaway. But that’s not what I think.”
“Oh my gosh, Mommy! Are you investigating what happened to Donna?”
“I am. I’m working with a detective at the Sheriff’s department. They reopened her case and we’re going to work together to find out what happened to my best friend. What do you think about that?”
Zoey sat back and put her hands up in the air. “Mommy, I think that is amazing. I hope you find her. I really want to meet her.”
“Me too, honey.”
“What have you found so far?”
“Well, I just received the file last night from Detective Hirsch. He’s the detective I’m working with. This morning, I’m going to read through her case file and start my investigation.”
“Oh, that’s why you need me to quiet down. Can I help in any way?”
“Well, maybe it would help if I had colored stickies or colored markers that I could use to color-code the case file. Do you think that is something you could help with?”
“Oh boy, do I. I’ll go look through my supplies. I’ll be right back, okay?”
“Okay.”
I smiled as she ran off to find supplies.
Statistically, Donna was likely dead and had been for some time. But wouldn’t it be something if she wasn’t, and I found her living her best life and she could meet my daughter? We could reconnect and eat nachos and drink Shirley Temples - not spiked. This was the kind of hope that fueled families and friends of missing people. I didn’t have the optimism of Zoey, but I wish I did.
Zoey padded back into the kitchen with colorful papers and markers clutched in her hands. She set them down on the dining table. “I brought you some highlighters. There is pink, blue, green, and yellow, and I also brought you some sticky notes. Some are heart-shaped and some are sparkly. Do you think you’ll need anything else?”
“Nope, that’s perfect. Thank you so much, Zoey.”
“No problem. So, since you’re leaving on your trip tomorrow and Claire is going to stay with me, can Claire and I order pizza for dinner tomorrow night?”
This girl’s love for pizza was limitless. “I’ll talk to Claire and see what she has planned. But it’s okay with me.”
“Speaking of Claire and nannies … Have you decided who you want to hire to replace her after she goes off to become a nurse?”
Don’t remind me. “Not yet. How do you feel about Claire becoming a nurse and not being your nanny anymore?”
“Well, I know she’s worked really hard, and she’s going to be an awesome nurse. I just know it. But I’m sad, too. I’ll miss her. But she told me I’ll get a new nanny who will be really nice, and she said that maybe the new nanny will spend the night when you have to work late on special cases.”
“How do you feel about having a nanny who lives with us?”
She cocked her head. “I think it would be okay. Do you think it would be okay?”
“I think so.”
“Good. Well, I have my art project to do, and you have your investigation to do, so I’m going to leave you to it.”
I shook my head in amazement as I watched Zoey skip down the hall and into her bedroom.
I flipped open the file and read through the initial report. It felt like a series of flashbacks. That night. The next day. Her parents reported her missing as soon as she missed her one AM curfew. By sunrise, police were at their house and I was calling everyone I knew to find out if they’d seen or heard from her. It wasn’t like Donna to disappear and not let anyone know where she was.
I flipped through the witness statements. The first ones were from her parents. I read through them and my heart broke a little more. The sight of my own statement made my body stiffen. It was surreal. I was so young, so angry, and so hell-bent on getting out of that town. Never in a million years would I have thought I’d be back here investigating Donna’s disappearance. I read through my statement and felt like I’d taken a gut punch. I had been so naïve and stupid to have left her at the Boathouse Bar and Grill to go off with some guy I had barely known.
I flipped to the next page and read Kennedy Gilmore’s statement. My mouth dropped open as I read Kennedy’s account of that night. What the heck? I read through Theodore and Charlotte’s, as well. I shook my head in disbelief. Both Kennedy and Theodore saw Donna that night, around ten thirty, with someone out on the levee. According to the statement, it was dark and they couldn’t give an accurate description.
Heart racing, I read through the pages but saw nothing about a follow-up to figure out who was with her out on the levee. I checked through the folder twice. Nothing. The detective didn’t follow up on the only potential suspect in her disappearance?
I shut the folder, opened up the box of chocolates and popped one in my mouth, chewing and enjoying the dark chocolate and crunchy almonds. I swallowed and then grabbed my phone and called Hirsch. It was Saturday, but I had a feeling he was working. He seemed like the workaholic type - it took one to know one. “Hello.”
“Hey, Hirsch, it’s Martina. I’m just going through the Donna Bernard file. Did you notice that the Gilmores saw Donna with somebody on the levee that night, but no follow-up by the detective to figure out who was with her?”
“Everything I have on the case is in that file. The original detective retired a few years ago - he didn’t have a great reputation. I’ve read through it and notified the family that we are reopening the case, but that’s about it. Do you have any idea who she could have been with?”
“I don’t know. Maybe a family member or a boy? She wasn’t dating anyone at the time, but maybe she met someone after I left? I’ll put together a list of all her old boyfriends I can remember and any guys who hung around her. The person on levee, that the Gilmores spotted, may have done something to Donna. If they did, and they knew the case was reopened, they may have decided to get rid of any witnesses. The two cases could be related.” I paused for a breath. “I can’t believe I didn’t know about this.”
“You didn’t know that she had been seen on the levee that night with another person?”
“No, all these years, I thought I was the last person to see her alive. We were standing outside the Boathouse Bar and Grill, and I waved goodbye and she waved back as I drove off with some guy. I can’t believe this. We also need to re-interview Kennedy.”
“I have another formal interview scheduled with her for Monday. I can ask her about it then, since you’ll be in Pennsylvania.”
“Well, I think we should talk to the Bernards as soon as possible to find out if it was a family member who was with her that night. I have a few other questions, too.”
“I�
��ll call them and see what we can do. What time is your flight on Sunday?”
“Seven PM out of SFO.”
“I’ll give the Bernards a call to let them know I’m working with you.”
“I’d appreciate it.” With my heart still racing, I hung up the phone and started making a list of potential suspects.
My stomach was a ball of nerves as I knocked on the Bernard’s front door. As Hirsch and I waited for them to answer, I contemplated all the things I should’ve done. I should’ve called when I had gotten in town. I should’ve called or visited over the years. I should’ve looked for her before. I shook it off. This was it. We were going to find out what happened to Donna. The door opened and Mr. Bernard gave a friendly hello and welcomed us inside the house. He’d gone completely gray since I had seen him last. Always fit, he was now much heavier and his skin had paled. I stepped inside. My mind fluttered as all the memories from my youth came rushing back into my mind. They hadn’t redecorated, except for a few new family photos on the walls. I remembered all the times I spent in the living room with Donna, planning our futures, eating popcorn and watching TV or teasing her brothers.
He motioned to the sofa. “Please have a seat.” He sat down in one of two loungers across from it.
Mrs. Bernard entered as we sat. My heart was practically thumping out of my chest as our eyes met. I got up and smiled as a tear escaped. “Sandy, it’s good to see you.”
Sandy broke down and stepped closer to embrace me in a hug. “Oh, Martina, it’s good to see you too.” She stepped back. She shook her head and looked me up and down. “My goodness, look at you all grown up and a private investigator. I’m so proud of you,” she said, her voice cracking.
I stared into her eyes. “We’re going to find her.”
Sandy wiped her tears. “Can I get either of you anything to drink?”
