‘Just as well I’m not.’ His voice was strained. Partly with anger but also from struggling through this rain and mud with me in his arms. ‘What the hell did you think you were doing?’
‘Harvesting grapes before Storm Sandra hit? It got a bit messy that’s all.’
‘That’s all? Huh!’ His jaw was set like stone. ‘I arrive to tell you— Well, anyway, that can wait, and I find you in a tug-of-war contest with a tree while your dad’s waving a chainsaw literally millimetres from your unborn child.’
I swallowed. When he put it like that, it did seem a bit rash.
‘I thought you liked it when I did crazy stuff?’ I murmured, attempting to make him smile. What had he come to tell me?
He shook his head. ‘I am so mad with you right now.’
I looped my arms around his neck and clung on. I didn’t care; I was still glad to see him.
He carried me across the yard, where a man in a neon yellow waterproof coat was lifting medical kit out of the back of an ambulance car.
‘Is she for us too?’ he shouted. ‘Because we’ve only got the car. The emergency call rate goes through the roof in bad weather like this. All the rigs are out.’
‘No,’ Jensen yelled back, ‘I can deal with this one myself.’
‘I’m fine,’ I said crossly, feeling stronger already. ‘You fuss more than your gran. And you still haven’t said what you’re doing here.’
He pushed open the door of my cottage and put me down on the sofa. He took off his shoes and coat, peeled my wet coat and shoes off me and handed me a towel from the bathroom. The letter that Marjorie had given me earlier was still on the table and I saw him look at it. I wrapped the towel around my hair.
‘What does that bit at the end mean?’ I asked. ‘The bit in the strange language?’
‘It can wait,’ he said gruffly. ‘I’ll make you a hot drink, you’re shivering.’
I started to take off my clothes; the situation between us was anything but clear and it did seem a bit weird stripping off in front of him, but it wasn’t as if there was anything he hadn’t seen before. I pulled my jogging bottoms off and dumped them in a soggy pile on the floor.
He put the kettle on and caught my eye.
I smiled weakly. ‘You’re supposed to say, “Let’s get you out of those wet things.”’
‘And you’re supposed to …’ His voice tailed off and the colour drained from his face. ‘Lottie, darling.’
My heart bloomed in my chest: he called me darling. Then I followed his gaze. The tops of my inner thighs were streaked with blood. ‘Oh no, that’s not good.’
I looked at Jensen in horror and felt my stomach. Still no movement.
‘I haven’t felt the baby move for ages.’ I whispered hoarsely.
‘Right.’ He jumped to his feet and held his palms up. ‘Let’s not panic.’
‘Get help.’
‘I’ll get help.’ Jensen seized my face, planted a kiss on my lips and darted out of the door.
I stood there, frozen to the spot, staring at the mess on my legs.
‘Hang on in there, tiddler,’ I whispered, stroking my tummy. ‘It’s okay.’
The pain down my side was still there. More of a dull ache now than a stabbing pain and I stumbled back on to the sofa, wishing more than anything that Mum was here to hold my hand and tell me everything was going to be all right. It would be all right, wouldn’t it?
Chapter 34
I was probably only alone for a minute but to me it felt like time had stood still. I reached a hand between my legs. It felt warm and sticky and I didn’t need to look to know what was happening. The towel I’d used to dry my face and hair was on the floor by my feet. I reached down and hitched myself up, sliding it underneath me to protect the sofa. Thinking about the sofa was much easier than thinking about anything else.
I heard voices and several pairs of feet running towards the cottage. Evie came through the door first, bringing a gust of wind and rain with her followed by one of the paramedics. Lastly Jensen appeared and shut the door.
‘How’s Godfrey?’ I managed to say.
The paramedic stuck his thumb up. ‘No bones broken; my colleague’s treating him for shock.’
Evie skittered across the room towards me and grabbed my hand. ‘I’m not letting this happen to you. I’m not.’
She was soaked to the skin, her blonde hair plastered across her tear-stained cheeks. We stared at each other, and I knew she was thinking of her miscarriage and how her chance of motherhood had ebbed away. But this wasn’t the same; she’d done nothing wrong, whereas I’d behaved irresponsibly, without thought to my baby.
‘I’m sure I’m fine,’ I sniffed, giving her a thin smile as she brushed the tears away from my face. ‘Probably a storm in a teacup.’
‘Sure.’ She nodded and swallowed, her own eyes brimming with tears. ‘I’ll get you a tissue.’
‘Loo roll in the bathroom,’ I said.
The paramedic was a big, broad-shouldered redhead with a beard. He calmly knelt beside me and felt for my pulse. ‘I’m Hugh.’
Jensen hovered around, fidgeting. ‘What can I do? Boil a kettle, fetch towels?’
Hugh grinned at me. ‘Somebody’s been watching too much Call the Midwife.’
I tried to laugh but it came out as a shaky sob. ‘Just hold me please, Jensen.’
He sat down, wrapped one arm around my shoulders and held my hand tightly.
‘Let’s see what’s going on then, shall we?’ The paramedic opened a big bag and took out a stethoscope. ‘Do you mind lifting your top up?’
I did as I was asked and Hugh put the ends of the stethoscope in his ears. I looked at the pale curve of my tummy. I promise to put you first from now on, little one. Please give me a kick, hard as you can.
‘Ek is lief vir jou,’ Jensen whispered, pressing a kiss to the side of my face.
‘That’s what you said in the letter,’ I said weakly. ‘What does it mean?’
‘I love you.’
I thought my heart would explode. ‘I love you too.’
‘And I love you too,’ Evie cried, collapsing on to a chair.
I drew in a breath as Hugh moved the cold stethoscope across my skin, a slight frown on his face. He nodded, pulled the earpiece from his ears and grinned.
‘The heart’s beating like a drum. Baby sounds fine.’
‘Thank God.’ I squeezed my eyes tight and let out the breath I’d been holding. I’d been such a fool, taking my health for granted. From now on, I promised myself, I’d be a model mother-to-be.
Beside me I heard Jensen exhale steadily too as his grip on my hand tightened. Evie burst into tears and I reached out to rub her arm.
‘If anything had happened,’ she began, gulping noisily.
‘But it hasn’t,’ said Jensen in a shaky voice. ‘It hasn’t.’
‘And the bleeding?’ I asked, pulling my T-shirt back down. ‘Are you sure the baby is not in danger?’
Hugh sat back on his heels. ‘Could be due to a number of things. Best get to hospital and have it checked out. But in my opinion, there’s no immediate risk to the baby.’
Jensen and I exchanged looks, although I could barely see him through my veil of tears and his eyes looked moist too.
Just then the radio clipped to the edge of Hugh’s coat crackled into life.
‘Go ahead?’ said Hugh, pressing a button.
‘Mr Hallam is in the car, are you ready to go?’
‘Yep. On my way.’ He released the radio and got to his feet. ‘We can take you, Lottie, but there’d be no room for anyone else.’
‘I’m taking her,’ said Jensen.
Hugh patted my arm. ‘Then I’ll leave you in your boyfriend’s capable hands.’
Evie wiped her face. ‘I’ll go and let Dad know. He’ll be having kittens by now.’
Then it was just Jensen, me and the bump. Outside Storm Sandra continued to rage; wind whistled down the chimney, the roof creaked and the windows
were being buffeted with incessant rainfall. But inside my cottage, and to be more precise, here on my sofa, my world felt warm, safe and complete.
‘Thank you for coming back,’ I said, gazing at him. I knew my love for him was written all over my face but I couldn’t help it. I was tired of being coy about my feelings and not wanting to admit how much I cared for fear of it not being reciprocated. I thought back to what Evie had said about how she and Darren had stopped communicating; I wasn’t going to make that mistake.
He smiled.
‘I think I’m destined to be your second doctor, whether you like it or not.’ He kissed the top of my head and started to get up. ‘I’ll get you some dry clothes.’
I held on to his arm to stop him from moving.
‘Did you mean it?’ I swallowed. ‘What you said earlier?’
‘About being really mad with you?’ His lips twitched. ‘A bit. I thought I’d lost you.’
I smiled. ‘No. The other thing. Did you mean that?’
His eyes softened and he cupped a hand to my face. ‘Did you?’
‘I asked first.’
He covered my lips with his. ‘I love you, Lottie. With all my heart. Satisfied?’
I traced a line down his beautiful face with my fingertip. ‘Completely.’
The sonographer opened the door to the same ultrasound room I’d been in last time.
‘Miss Allbright?’ she said.
‘Call me Lottie,’ I said.
She smiled and ushered us in.
‘Hop on the bed and make yourself comfy,’ she said. If she knew this was an emergency appointment due to an unspecified bleed, her tone gave nothing away. She was calm and unhurried, which was very reassuring. ‘I’m Rachel. And you are?’
‘Jensen, apparently I’m called the birth-partner.’ His eyes sparkled as he tugged my trainers off for me. ‘I can’t wait to see him again.’
‘Or her.’ I smiled back, even though my heart was crashing against my ribs with nerves.
‘I don’t mind what it is, do you?’ he said, plumping up the pillow before I lay back.
My heart leapt with hope. That sounded like the sort of thing, well, that a father might say. I shook my head. ‘Just as long as it’s healthy.’
This scan was just a precaution and as I’d been booked in tomorrow for a slightly belated routine twenty-week scan, it was agreed they’d fit me in while I was at the hospital. So far this evening, I’d been examined and poked and prodded and roundly told off for overdoing it. But I didn’t mind. The amazing thing was that the baby’s heart was beating as it should be. And the second amazing thing was that Jensen was here, by my side, not as a friend as he’d been last time, but as someone I loved and who loved me.
His eyes locked on mine and we stared at each other, grinning inanely while Rachel eased the waistband of my leggings down, tucked a piece of tissue below the elastic and squirted the cold gel on to my tummy. Then I felt a pressure on my stomach and gasped with shock.
‘There’s baby.’ The sonographer leaned back so we had a good look at the screen. ‘He’s waving to you, look!’
Sure enough one arm was raised and waving.
‘Hello, darling thing!’ I said through a blur of tears. ‘I’m so happy to see you.’
‘Nothing wrong with this little fellow,’ Rachel laughed. She patted her head. ‘Oh, not again. I’ve put my glasses down somewhere. Excuse me a second.’
She got up and left the room, leaving us with an image of the baby on the screen.
Jensen walked around to the far side of the bed, leaned over and kissed me. ‘I thought I’d lost you.’ Then he touched his fingertip to the screen. ‘And you.’
I sat up and pulled him close. ‘I’m so glad you didn’t.’
We kissed again, slowly and tenderly, and I thought my heart would melt.
He smiled. ‘You asked me earlier why I came back.’
I stared at him, my breath catching in my throat, praying he wasn’t just here to say goodbye after all. ‘And?’
He dug his fingers into his pocket and pulled out a strip of paper. ‘We didn’t finish reading out the fortune cookies.’
I frowned. He was right. I’d read mine. Something about getting pleasure from seeing your loved ones prosper. It had confirmed my decision to set him free to take the promotion. Except he hadn’t, had he? He was still here. Thank heavens.
‘So I’m going to read mine out. Ready?’
I nodded.
‘If you have someone good in your life, don’t let them go.’ He cupped my face in his hands and kissed me again. ‘And as I figured you’re the best thing in my life, why would I let you go?’
His kisses tasted of sunshine and happiness and above all home, but there was still something I needed to be certain of. I ended the kiss and ran my fingertips over his lovely face.
‘And the baby?’ I asked quietly.
Jensen’s face split into the widest smile. ‘Is the second best thing.’
‘Sorry, sorry, sorry!’ Rachel arrived back in the room looking flustered. ‘My reading glasses have gone AWOL. I’ve had to borrow someone else’s or I won’t be able to type my notes.’
As I lay back down I caught hold of Jensen’s hand, marvelling at how magical my life had become and wondering what I’d done to deserve it and a thought struck me.
‘Rachel, you’ve referred to the baby as “he” and “little fellow”. Are you trying to tell us something?’
She shook her head. ‘No, don’t worry, we always use the masculine, I wouldn’t tell you the baby’s sex unless you asked. Do you want to know?’
Jensen and I looked at each other. He raised an eyebrow as if to say that it was up to me and my heart began to thump.
‘Yes please!’
Rachel picked up the probe again but Jensen quickly put a hand on her arm to stop her.
‘I just need to ask a question first.’ Out of his pocket he pulled the engagement ring that I’d left on the table at home and held it up. ‘Lottie, I love you very much. Will you marry me? For real this time?’
‘YES PLEASE!’
He slipped the ring on to my finger and I reached around his neck and kissed him with all my heart.
‘I’ve seen some things in this room,’ said Rachel with a sniff, ‘but that was the best ever.’
Jensen puffed his chest out. ‘I’m quite pleased with it myself.’
‘Now,’ said Rachel, dabbing a tissue to her eyes, ‘ready to find out the sex?’
‘Do you know?’ I said suddenly. ‘I think I’ve had enough surprises for one day.’
‘Don’t blame you.’ Rachel chuckled, wiping the gel from my tummy.
‘Then shall we go home?’ Jensen held out a hand to me. ‘You and me.’
I laced my fingers through his. ‘And baby makes three.’
For a moment we just looked at each other as if we couldn’t quite believe what had happened and my heart swelled with love for this man.
There was still so much to talk about: his job, my job, the future of the vineyard and what was going to happen when the baby came along.
But none of that mattered. What mattered was that he loved me and I loved him. And when you’ve got love anything is possible.
Epilogue
‘There. It’s finished.’ I pressed the earth firmly around the base of the rose bush and brushed the loose specks of dirt from the brass plaque.
‘Don’t dig it up again, Starsky,’ Jensen said fondly, as the little dog sniffed around the newest plant in the vineyard. Starsky scampered off and took a flying leap into Marjorie’s lap.
‘Muddy paw prints!’ she said drily. ‘Just what I’ve always wanted.’
I peeled off my gardening gloves and thought about standing up. The problem was that at seven and a half months’ pregnant I was so top heavy that I didn’t dare. The thought of toppling over in front of the assembled crowd didn’t appeal.
‘Here, allow me.’ Jensen, anticipating my dilemma as usual, offered m
e a hand and pulled me up.
‘Why thank you, kind sir.’ I snuggled into him and we wrapped an arm around each other.
‘Read it out to me again,’ said Betsy, squinting in the low winter sunlight.
It was only a few days until Christmas and although the grass still retained its coat of frost in the most shadowy corners, the sunlight felt warm on my face.
‘In memory of Ted Butterworth.’ Marjorie leaned forward in her wheelchair. ‘Forever loved, much missed and never forgotten. Nothing brings people together like good wine and nobody achieved that better than Ted.’
‘That’s lovely.’ Betsy pressed the corner of her hanky to her eye. ‘Perfect. Thank you, Lottie.’
‘You’ll be able to sit here and talk to him, or just enjoy being here,’ I said, releasing Jensen to give her a hug. ‘The wooden bench will go just there, behind us, in Ted’s favourite spot. You can come and breathe it all in anytime.’
She looked at me with her watery pale blue eyes and my heart ached for her. In the six months I’d known her, her sight had already deteriorated. But she was moving in with Marjorie in the New Year and it would be the start of a new adventure for both of them. As long as they had each other, they’d be happy.
‘He’d love it.’ Sidney twirled the end of his moustache and winked at me. ‘And such a practical solution too.’
The rose bush was a memorial to Ted and his ashes would be sprinkled here too when Betsy felt up to it. But the plan was to plant a rose at the end of every row of vines which would look beautiful in summer but would also serve another purpose. Sidney told me that this was what they did in his estate in Reims as a way of detecting possible diseases early and now I was adopting it here too.
Betsy cleared her throat. ‘And talking of practical solutions …’
She turned to Marjorie, who lifted up one buttock and removed two envelopes from under her.
‘With our warmest wishes, literally,’ she said, shooting Marjorie a look, before handing Jensen and me an envelope each.
We glanced at each other curiously and tore into them.
Mine was a letter from a solicitor, stating that I’d been given a ten per cent share in Butterworth Wines.
A Vintage Summer Page 38
