My husband.
I’ve betrayed him. And if he finds out, Frankie Cabbetto won’t be the only man who wants me dead.
Vanni
“Anyone seen Logan?”
People aren’t staying where they should be staying, I’m having to look for them and that’s wasting my time.
“Think he’s out back.” Dragon jerks his head toward the corridor that leads out into the back yard and I head off down there, flinging the door open, and Dragon’s right. Logan’s leaning back against the wall, smoking a joint, looking way too relaxed for someone with so much shit hanging over his head.
“Everything OK here?”
His head shoots around to face me. “Yeah. Everything’s fine.”
“The women all right?”
“Seem to be.”
“You?”
“I’m fine. What the fuck does it matter how I feel anyway?”
“It doesn’t matter. I was just trying to be friendly, y’know, seeing as you’re having to deal with the reappearance of the woman who broke your heart.”
He narrows his eyes as he stares me down, he don’t like the way I’m making this sound. But it’s the truth. Piper told me as much.
“Piper been talking to you, huh?”
“She’s my wife, Logan. She tells me everything.”
He turns his head away from me and takes another drag on his joint. “She didn’t tell you who she really was, not at first.”
“I already knew who she was. There are no more secrets, not now.”
There’s something about the way his body reacts to that last sentence, I don’t know. It’s hard to put my finger on it, but something happened there. A drop of the shoulders, a slight twist of a smile, I don’t know. Maybe I should be keeping a closer eye on Logan Sandero.
“She been talking to you?”
As soon as I ask that question he looks at me, but his expression is impassive. Blank. This guy can do emotionless better than me. Sometimes.
“Not really. Only the stuff you wanted her to tell me. About her family. Nothing personal, don’t worry.”
“I’m not worried, Logan.”
But maybe he should be.
Maybe…
Logan
It’s like I’ve got some kind of death wish, the way I’m reacting to Vanni, the way I’m acting. I guess I’m just tired, of all the shit and the lies; the deceit. Shit that could get me killed, Piper too. And yet, there’s a part of me that actually wishes he’d find out, then it’s out there, in the open, and neither me nor Piper could turn back from that. We may not get a chance to.
“Vierra’s getting closer, Logan. I’m calling church in a little while, make sure everyone’s here.”
He turns and heads back inside and I breathe a heavy sigh of relief. My head’s so fucked up right now, the only thing I’m sure of is that what I said to Piper before, I meant it. All of it. I meant every fucking word, I want her. Am I falling in love with her? I don’t know. It’s been that long since I left myself open to that emotion I’m not even sure what it feels like anymore. Do I feel all messed-up crazy whenever I see her? Do I wish I could wake up with her there beside me, fall asleep with her in my arms; does having her around, just knowing she’s there, does that make me feel different? Yeah. All of that shit so, maybe, y’know? Maybe I really am learning what it’s like to love someone again. I just didn’t think that someone would be the wife of the man whose club saved me. And there’s a part of me that wished Reba’s reappearance – part of me wishes I’d felt differently, when I saw her. Part of me wishes I could’ve felt the same way I felt all those years ago, when I’d wanted nothing more than her, a family, a stable fucking life, but she drove me to this. To where I am now. And there’s no room in this life for her, for the people we once were. It’s too fucking late. I’m in love with another woman now, there, I’ve said it.
I’m in love with another woman.
A woman I can’t have.
I can’t have her.
And I still fucking want her…
Fifteen
Piper
It’s getting dark out, and Vanni wants the yard kept that way, although he’s keeping an eye on everything via the CCTV camera that overlooks the compound, front, back and sides. There are premises here that constantly need watching – a small bar they open up to the public on weekends, Dragon’s tattoo studio, a garage and workshop for bike repairs. They’ve got a whole little industry going on here, but until Vanni’s dealt with Vierra, they’re all closed off to anyone but club members and their family; those of us who are being kept here, on lockdown, ‘cause Vanni doesn’t know just what kind of shit my father’s really going to deal out, who that shit will be aimed at, it may not just be me he’s gunning for now.
“You OK?”
“You shouldn’t be out here. There are cameras everywhere now, you know that.”
He doesn’t move, he leans back against the wall beside me and follows my gaze.
“Looking at the stars, huh?”
“You should go inside, Logan.”
“I need some fresh air.”
“I thought Vanni had called church.”
“It’s finished.”
“How close is he? Vierra?”
“Close. Two nights ago he was seen in Vegas, checking out Vanni’s compound. But he’s heading here now, Piper. We have to assume that he’s already in L.A., so we’re on standby. We’re just waiting now.”
“Jesus…”
My stomach pulls itself into a knot so tight I can’t breathe.
“You should be the one to go inside, Piper. You’ll be safer in there.”
“I don’t feel safe anywhere, Logan.”
I look up at him, and I’m feeling everything from fear to confusion, I feel sick with nerves and a realization that maybe I was right. Maybe I stopped running too soon, stopped at someone like Vanni because he was there and I was in a panic, and I just needed that safety. I needed it. Did I really need him?
“Once this is over, Logan… what happens then, huh?”
“What do you want to happen?”
I can’t answer that question. I think it’s safer to stay quiet. “I’d better get back inside, huh?”
“Piper, hang on!”
He follows me inside, follows me into mine and Vanni’s room, kicking the door shut behind him.
“Jesus, Logan, what are you doing? Vanni is just outside…”
“I don’t give a fuck anymore, Piper.”
He shrugs, and that fear I felt before, it’s a hundred times worse now, so strong I have to swallow hard to keep the nausea down.
“I don’t. I mean, Jesus, I’ve had worse shit thrown at me, faced more terrifying crap than the prospect of Vanni Colletti taking me down…”
“Which he will do, Logan, if he catches you in here.”
“What do you want to happen, Piper? ‘Cause you haven’t answered that question yet.”
“It doesn’t matter what I want…”
“What do you want to happen, Piper?”
His eyes are boring into mine, I can’t break the stare, he’s got me, and I’m floored. I’m scared and confused and I thought I was safe, with Vanni, but now I know that the second I laid eyes on Logan Sandero that safety disappeared. And now – now I’m in way more danger than I was before, the walls of this clubhouse can’t keep me safe, not when the one thing that’s put me in that new line of fire is right here inside it.
“I want this all to go away,” I whisper, even though I know that’s no answer, it means nothing. It tells him, nothing.
“And then what? Then what, Piper? What do you want, when all this is over?”
I step back from him, noises outside in the corridor are making me jumpy, setting me on edge, this is suicide.
“When all this is over, Piper, what the fuck do you want?” he hisses through gritted teeth, and I look at him. His eyes are blazing now, his frustration pushing him close to breaking point, I’ve seen this in so man
y men both here and back home.
“You need to go, Logan. Please.”
He shakes his head and comes toward me, but I back even further away, I can’t do this, I can’t. I love Vanni, I need to keep telling myself that. I love Vanni, I love him, the man who promised to protect me. I love him. I owe him.
“Please, Logan…”
He reaches out to take my hand, and I try to pull it back but he’s too quick, his fingers just grasping mine before I can move them away.
“You force me to face up to something then deny me the chance to express how I feel? That’s goddamn cruel, sweetheart.”
I shake my head as he pushes me back against the wall, his fingers tightening around mine, he’s so close I can feel his breath on my shoulder.
“So here’s how it is, OK? I thought I couldn’t have you, but I can have anything. Vanni doesn’t own you, nobody owns anyone, not really. And you want me, too, I can see it, right there in your eyes. Yeah, you’re not the only one who can read people, Piper. You think you can hide how you really feel forever, huh?”
“I won’t be here forever. Vanni and me, we’ll be heading back to Nevada once all this is finished…”
“This’ll never be finished, not really. You and me, we’ll never be finished. You might very well go home, leave California behind, but me? No, you won’t leave me behind, you won’t be able to do that…”
“So arrogant…”
His mouth crashes down onto mine, and even though every fiber of my being is screaming at me to push him away, to kick him back from me, I can’t. I don’t. And when he pulls back just a little, rests his forehead against mine, his thumb lightly stroking my cheek I feel a twisted kind of calm take over, flooding through my veins like someone’s just given me a shot of something.
“I tried, Piper. I tried to leave you behind but I couldn’t do it. And when you turned up here, I started fighting those feelings again, because having you around all the time, it was fucking torture, it hurt like hell. But I kept trying. And fucking you, yeah, that was good, but it wasn’t helping me forget, it was only making things worse, because I wanted you. From the very first second I saw you, I wanted you. Everything else I said or did to try and make myself believe that wasn’t true, that was just an act. A preventative measure, something to try and block out what I was really feeling. But what you said to me, this morning, it hit home, baby. It fucking hit home. I want you. And I need to know if you want me, too.”
“Logan, we can’t…”
“Do you want me, too, Piper?”
“Yes.”
And I mean it this time. I’ve said it before, but I was never really sure, but I mean it now. I want him.
“Then we need to work something out. But not now, OK? When this is done, when it’s over…”
“Then what, huh?”
He lets go of me like I’m on fire, and we both look over at the door because Vanni’s standing there, his face a dark mask of anger, and I’ve never felt so terrified.
“You gonna answer my question? Either of you?”
He looks from one of us to the other, but it’s like I’m shutting down, like my body’s just giving up, closing itself off to this nightmare scenario. And then he walks over to me, grabs me by the arm and flings me back against the wall, his face so close to mine I can feel that anger spilling out of him.
“Is this how you repay the man who promised to keep you safe?”
I can’t speak, I can’t even tell him I’m sorry, my throat’s just closed up. Am I sorry? Yes, I am, but it’s happened. Logan Sandero came into my life and fucked it up even more than it already was, and I was too weak to stop it; to stop him. I was too weak. And now we both have to pay that price.
“Let her go, Vanni.”
Vanni drops his head and laughs, but it’s not that deep, low laugh of his, this laugh is laced with a dark foreboding that fills the room with an air of something terrifying. “You want me to let her go…” He keeps hold of my wrist but turns his head to look at Logan. “So, what, Logan? So you can whisk her to safety? Her Death Knight in shining fucking armor?”
“Just let her go. You’re hurting her.”
“I’m not hurting her, am I, darlin’?”
He turns his face toward mine, but I don’t recognize the man I married. He’s gone, what I’m seeing here is the man Vanni really is.
“Am I hurting you, Piper? This man wants to know the answer to that question.”
“No.”
And that’s a lie, Logan knows that, but he doesn’t push it, even though I can see he wants to.
“See? I’m not hurting her. She’s fine. For now.”
His words send a trickle of fear coursing through me, tearing through my body so fast I feel my head start to spin.
“I said, let her go, you crazy asshole.”
I can’t stop the gasp of horror that escapes as Logan pulls his gun on Vanni, but still Vanni keeps hold of my wrist, swinging me around until I’m in front of him, his arm now keeping me pinned back against him. “You a good enough shot to miss her? Think you can do that, son?”
“What’s all the fucking noise…?” Bullet stops dead in the doorway as he tries to process the scene in front of him. “Jesus, Logan, put the gun down, man.”
“Your brother here’s right, Logan. You might want to put down that gun, and let’s talk about this like adults, huh?”
“Let her go. Or I’ll fucking shoot you, Vanni, so help me god…”
“Logan, please…”
But even my pleas aren’t getting through to him, he’s not listening anymore, he’s someplace else, he’s too focused. And it’s only when we all hear a gunshot ringing out from within the clubhouse that he loses that focus; that Vanni lets go of me, his hand automatically reaching for his own gun as more shots are heard, and I don’t know what to do. I’m frozen in fear, my feet won’t move, even when everyone else rushes toward the door. But then Logan looks back at me, and in an instant we both know what we have to do, it’s our only chance.
He quickly glances over at the retreating figures of Vanni and Bullet as they race toward the main part of the clubhouse, the sound of gunshots and screams and a sickening commotion filling the air, it’s a terrifying sound. And I want to be sick, I can feel my mouth go dry then fill up with bile but I haven’t got time for that, I need to swallow it down and run.
“Come on…”
Logan holds out his hand and I take it as he drags me down the hallway to the back door, kicking it open and looking outside. It seems strangely quiet out here, although the sound of what I’m assuming are my father’s men and the Death Knights facing off is still deafening, and I want that numbness to take over again. I don’t want this to be happening, it’s too much.
Logan pulls me around the back of the clubhouse until we reach the small path that takes us out front, and then he stops, pushing me flat against the garage wall before he carefully peers out into the compound.
“Shit!” he mutters, which causes my stomach to contract again, and I double over and vomit, but his hand grabs mine and pulls me away before I even have time to finish throwing up. “Come on. We need to get out of here.”
I close my eyes and breathe in deep as we run out into the yard, Logan dragging me behind him, and I try not to take notice of the two lifeless bodies lying by the clubhouse entrance, I don’t know whether they’re club members or Vierra’s men, I don’t look that closely, I’m trying to keep my eyes focused straight ahead.
“Get on the bike,” Logan instructs, and I don’t know whether it’s his bike or just the first available one he came to, it doesn’t really matter, it’s our escape. “Those bastards have already opened the gates for us…”
I look over toward the gates, they’re wide open now. I can only assume that the men lying dead outside the clubhouse were the men Vanni had guarding the gates; that they were forced to open them then shot dead in cold blood, I don’t know, I’m only assuming. Because I don’t know what the hell is
happening here, I only know I need to get away, we need to get away.
Logan kicks the bike into action and we speed off in the direction of Venice, and I don’t know whether we should be going there, going anywhere that Vierra might think I could be, when he finds out I’m not at the clubhouse. Because he will find out, soon, and he won’t give up looking for me. That isn’t going to happen. We just need to get away from here, as fast as we can, because police sirens are now mingling with the sound of gunshots, all kinds of shit is about to kick off.
I hold onto Logan as we speed through the streets of L.A., and yet, the further we ride away from the clubhouse – I still don’t feel safe. I don’t know if I’ll ever be safe again.
When we reach Vanni’s place in Marina del Rey Logan leaves the bike in the underground garage and we head up to the condo, my hand clinging onto his, I’m too frightened to let go of him. And as we close the door behind us I take a second to breathe, because it feels like I haven’t done that since we left the clubhouse. I take a second to catch my breath, to let the whole fucked up situation sink in, and then that fear takes hold again, sweeping over me so fast I have to sit down.
“Here. Drink this.”
I look up as Logan hands me a glass of what I’m assuming is whiskey. And I knock it back in one mouthful, waiting for the alcohol hit to take over, but it’s going to take a lot of whiskey before I feel any effect. I’m too numb, too detached from everything now.
“We aren’t safe here, Logan. Vierra won’t give up, and this condo… It’ll be one of the first places he’ll come looking for me. And Vanni…” I drop my head and stare into my empty glass. And I don’t finish that sentence, I don’t think I have to.
“We just need a few minutes, Piper. To calm down and think.”
“What’ve we done, Logan?”
He sweeps a hand through his hair and throws back his head, sighing heavily, but he can’t answer that question.
“They must’ve found out, what Vanni was gonna do. Vierra, he must’ve brought more men, come ready to do battle, it isn’t just my life they’ll want to take now. Everyone’s in danger… Jesus, Logan, what about Reba? If Marco finds her there…”
Protection (Death Knights MC Series Book 1) Page 16
