by M. W. Muse
"Season?" Don asked frantically. "She just squeezed my hand," he said, talking away from me.
"Don," I barely breathed, not sure if he could hear me.
He was right back at my ear. "Yes, Season, I'm here. We're all here." "Don't go . . ."
"I'm not going anywhere," he cried, but I could hear a hint of relief in his voice. "I'm hurting."
I heard several people gasp. Now that I was able to speak and move a little, I realized I was in excruciating pain.
"Where are you hurting, sweetheart?" Don was panicked. "Everywhere."
I lost the grip I had on his hand. I could no longer speak or move. "Season? Season!"
"Everybody out," someone ordered. "I'm not leaving!" Don bellowed.
"He can stay," Melissa said. Since I asked him not to go, she wasn't going to make him leave.
"C'mon Chrys," I heard Chloe say.
Chrys's breathing spiked, and I knew he wanted to stay, too. But he left quietly. I felt hands all over me. Don let go of my hand, but he was right by my head,
talking to me, letting me know he was right there with me. "Why is she in pain?" Don asked angrily.
"It's actually good she's hurting. It means she can feel." The voice turned away from me, I guessed talking to Melissa. "Now that she's woken up, we can treat her pain, but the medication that she'll be on will cause her to be out of it for a few days. She'll wake up here and there, but only briefly while her body heals itself." He lowered his voice and said, "Because of who she is, it's the best way."
"Okay," Melissa murmured, and I realized the doctor was in on the family secret.
When he spoke again, he used a regular tone. "After a few days, we'll start to taper her off the medication to see where she's at in the healing process. If she's in a great deal of pain, we'll start all over again."
The morphine must have kicked in because the next thing I heard were monitors beeping, then some voices, and I could feel both my hands being held. I tried to open my eyes, but I couldn't.
"Ouch," I mumbled.
"Season?" I heard Don ask. "Get the doctor."
The other person dropped my other hand and left. I moaned again trying to move my body.
"He's on his way," Chrys said and held my hand again. "Melissa's on her way back up, too."
The pain was building slowly, getting more intense. "I'm really hurting."
"The doctor will be in here in a minute," Don whispered. "Your pain medication is wearing off, and they need to check on your healing progress."
I started crying. "It's getting worse." "I'm sorry, sweetheart."
I felt Don's hands on my face and Chrys's hand stroking my arm. I was on fire! I started screaming. The pain was unbelievable.
"Season? I need you to calm down," I heard an older man's voice say.
I tried, but I was hysterical. "Why am I hurting? It hurts all over. Don!" I turned toward the hand he was holding again.
He put his free arm around my neck, hugging me. I cried uncontrollably. "Shhhh." Don tried to sooth me. "What are you waiting for? Please just give her
the medicine."
"We just did. I was afraid of this. We'll give it another try in a few days." I whined as the pain lessened.
"Try to relax, sweetheart." Don had his hand on my face, stroking it as the pain disappeared, and I fell asleep.
Sometime later, I heard the monitors clearly but didn't hear any voices; not even a breath disturbed the air. I felt something in my hand, the same hand Don had held, and it was hard, cold. I grasped it, trying to figure out what it was.
Then I heard the door open.
"Season, I'm your nurse. Can you hear me?" I mumbled.
"Good. There's nothing to be scared about. I'm going to call Melissa. She just stepped out for a minute. The beds aren't very comfortable, so she was having trouble sleeping."
"What time is it?"
"It's two in the morning." "Don?"
"He left when visiting hours were over. He's been here every day and so has your other friend. You have quite the little fan club." She chuckled. "I wish my boyfriend looked like either one of them, and girl, they both think you hung the moon."
I wanted Don here.
"She's awake," the nurse said away from me. She must be talking to Melissa. "Season, Melissa is on her way up."
"'Kaaay."
I felt like I was falling asleep, but I heard the door open again. "Season?" "Hmm?"
"It's Melissa. How are you feeling?" "Tired. I want Don."
"I know, honey. He'll be back in the morning." "No . . . call him, please."
"I am. He asked me to call if you woke up."
I started to fall asleep, but I heard Melissa mumble on the phone. "Season, he's coming up here right now. You can go back to sleep." I did and woke up with Don's hand in my hand.
"Don?"
"Yes, sweetheart. I'm here." "What time is it?"
"It's about ten in the morning." "When did you get here?"
"I've been here since Melissa called me last night."
I tried to lift the hand he wasn't holding, so I could touch his face, but someone else had it.
"Who's over there?"
"Chrys. He's been here every day, too. So have Chloe and Melissa. Laurel has visited you, too, and so did my mom. Everyone's been so worried about you."
"Every day? How long?" I wanted to ask how long I'd been here, but I didn't have the strength to finish.
"You've been here six days. They did two rounds of heavy medication. This is the second time they've tried weaning you off. Do you remember the first time?"
"I remember hurting, screaming."
"You did," Don whispered. "You were in a lot of pain. It was very hard seeing you like that. Are you in any pain now?"
"Yeah."
I felt Don move and fidget with something on my bed. The intercom buzzed. "She's awake and hurting. Can you send in the doctor?" Don asked.
"Yes, sir."
"You need to rest," Don said to me. "Your body is healing, but you seem to be doing much better this time. They'll give you some more medicine after the doctor examines you, but it won't be as much as before."
"Okay."
"How do you feel?" Don asked while Chrys stroked my arm. "Like I got hit by a train."
I heard the door open.
"Season, I'm Dr. Johnston. How are you feeling?" "Not good. It hurts to move."
"We're going to put you on a morphine pump now, so you can disburse the medicine when you need it. I want you to sleep as much as you want today, but when you're awake, try to stretch out in the bed. Tomorrow, we're going to get you up and around. Depending on how well you do then, you may be able to go home that afternoon. Can you open your eyes for me?"
I opened and shut them quickly. The light was too bright. The doctor turned off the overhead light, and I opened them a little. Then he took his light and examined each of my eyes. They felt puffy and sore.
He continued examining me, so I turned my head and stared at Don for the first time. His eyes were red and swollen, too, like he had been crying for days. He looked so tired and weak.
"You look sad," I whispered to Don as I faintly rubbed my thumb on the side of his hand.
He sighed, and fresh tears formed. "It's been a long week."
"I'm sorry you had to go through this." I didn't want him hurting, no matter how much pain I was in.
"I'm sorry I couldn't take your place." His tears spilled over. "Do you know what happened?" the doctor asked.
"Um, I remember being at work. The roof was leaking, and I was mopping." I turned my head to look at Chrys. He seemed just as bad as Don did. I sighed and glanced at the doctor. "Then I remember being here and screaming."
I remembered more than that, but I didn't want Chrys to hurt any more than he should. I could tell he had beaten himself up enough already for our fight and for his mother's involvement. And Don was apparently trying to be understanding and let Chrys stay. If Don knew about the fight Chrys and I had
when the lightning struck, his leniency would vanish. Even though he looked as if he could barely stand, he'd
probably find enough strength to throw Chrys right out of the room with his bare hands.
"You were struck by lightning. You're very lucky," the doctor continued. I nodded slowly.
"Hit the call button if you need anything." The doctor and the nurse vacated. I yawned.
"You should try to go back to sleep," Don whispered.
I slept peacefully with both my hands being held. I was happy to have Don and Chrys here with me. I didn't like the fact that I wanted Chrys here, but I didn't argue with myself. I was just glad Don swallowed his pride and allowed Chrys to comfort me, too. I woke up sometime later and heard Don and Chrys whispering.
"I'm not saying I don't believe you," Don said. "What I am saying is you're done." "I won't allow that."
"You don't have a choice." "Neither does she."
It was obvious they were talking about me.
"Stop fighting," I breathed as I turned my head to Don and opened my eyes. He straightened in his chair, stroked my head, and gazed at me apologetically.
"I'm sorry. We didn't mean to wake you."
"You didn't." I turned toward Chrys. "Be nice." "Sorry," he mumbled.
I looked at the ceiling and slipped both my hands from theirs. "What are you doing?" Don asked.
I didn't say anything. I just stretched my arms over my head, arched my back, pointed my toes, and winced with the effort.
"Okay, that's good," Don said.
"No." I shook my head. "How do I get the bed up?"
"Here are the controls. This one's up, and this one's down. Just be careful."
Don and Chrys both stood up and watched my face as I set the bed in a more upright position, leaving it slightly reclined. I winced a few times, and they both put hands on my shoulders, comforting me.
"Don, I can barely lift my legs."
"That's because you're still sedated. You're not supposed to get up right now." "I'm not trying to get up. Can you just move my legs around for me?"
"Of course," he whispered.
Don stuck his hands under my blanket and lightly grabbed my ankle with one hand and put his other hand under my knee. He moved my leg back and forth and around in circles. Then he did the other leg. "Is that good?"
"Yes, thank you." I yawned and blinked but didn't open my eyes. "Season?" Chrys asked.
I heard him but didn't have the strength to answer. "Just let her sleep."
"Do you think we should put the bed back down?"
I didn't want to move. This new position was too wonderful. "No. Just leave her be."
Good. Don knew what I wanted. Then I fell completely under.
The next day came quickly. As I opened my eyes, Don and Chrys were there with Melissa and Chloe. I was asleep every time Melissa and Chloe had been there the day before, so I was happy to see them.
Melissa stood beside Don with a determined look in her eyes. Right. I had to get out of bed today.
"Season, how do you feel?" Melissa asked. "Better."
"Good. Let's get you up and move you around."
Thankfully, I had to move just a little to sit up completely. Don and Chrys had their hands behind my shoulders in case I slipped back, and Don put the arm rail down.
"Chloe, make sure I'm not flashing everyone, Okay?"
"Sure thing." She made sure my gown was securely fastened while the guys averted their eyes.
After she was done, Don stood right in front of me. He put one arm around my back and the other on my waist, and he gently pulled me out of the bed while I struggled to push. Once my feet were on the floor, I held onto his arms, feeling woozy. I tried to take a step but stumbled slightly, and Don grasped me tighter. I heard someone rushing around the bed.
"I've got her," Don said curtly.
I glanced over, and Chrys looked panicked. "I'm fine," I assured him. "Just dizzy."
Chrys nodded and stepped away but didn't go back to his spot. He stayed far enough away to give me some privacy but close enough that he could probably reach me if Don's grip slipped.
Chloe followed us with the IV stand, and after several steps, I was doing better. When I looked up, Don was watching my feet but glanced up to see if I was in any pain as we started to make oure way back to the bed. When his eyes met mine, I smiled.
"Does this count as dancing?" I joked.
Don almost laughed, but with the condition I was in, he wasn't going to. "I'd be holding you much closer if we were dancing."
As we circled the room, I noticed there were a lot of flowers in here. One table had many different arrangements, and another table had several different vases filled with a dozen roses in each. Each of the rose arrangements contained a dozen roses dedicated to a just one color. I grinned and sighed.
Don stiffened, his eyes flashing to my face. When he saw that I didn't sigh in pain, he relaxed. "What are you smiling about?"
"All the flowers."
"Oh." He smiled back, and we started walking again.
"Who are they from?" Though, I had a pretty good idea who brought the roses.
"Everybody in here. My mom, Melissa's co-workers, and Kim and Emma sent you some, too."
I glanced over at Chloe, and she shrugged. I should have known that Kim would use my near-death experience as an opportunity to kiss-up.
"How many roses are over there?" I whispered.
"Seven dozen," he murmured. "One for each day. I didn't want to throw out the old ones. I remembered the last time I tried to do that."
I chuckled, and he smiled.
"Do you know what each of these colors represents?" I asked, glancing at the table full of roses.
"Umm, yeah." He looked at the table and described them from left to right. "Peach is for innocence and purity. Pink is for elegance and grace. The purple ones identify love at first sight. Yellow is for familiar love and everlasting joy. White is for everlasting love. Orange represents the fire of passion and desire. And red is for true love—those are my favorite to give to you."
"Wow. I'm not sure if I can remember all that."
"You don't have to. I explained each one in the cards attached to them." He glanced at me and smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes.
Once we made it back to the bed, I hesitated. "I think that's good," Don said.
He stepped closer to help me in the bed, and I slid my hands off his shoulders to the tops of his arms. But instead of taking my hands off him to grasp the mattress, I wrapped my arms around him, laid my head on his chest, and weakly hugged him. His breathing spiked, and he gently wrapped his arms around my back and barely squeezed. He held me gingerly for several seconds before kissing me on the top of my head.
"I love you," he murmured.
And I knew that his love was all I would ever need.
Chapter 20
Since Melissa's SUV was too tall for me to comfortably climb into, Don drove me home from the hospital. He held my hand and watched me more than he watched the road. He didn't speak, probably hoping I'd sleep since he walked me all over the hospital before I was released.
Melissa was in the kitchen on the phone giving someone an update on my condition when we walked in, so Don took me up to my bedroom. He tucked me in, pulled my desk chair up to my bed, and sat right by me, holding my hand. I felt like I was about to fall asleep, but Don seemed almost zombie-like.
"You don't look like you've slept at all over the last week," I mumbled. "I haven't really." He rubbed the back of his other hand on my cheek. "You can't watch me twenty-four hours a day, Don."
"I'm not leaving you. Please don't ask me to do that." "I'm not." I hesitated. "Why don't you lie down with me?"
Don's breath caught. "Um, I don't want to hurt you. I'll be fine."
"You won't hurt me. I want you to get some sleep, and I'll sleep better with you beside me. Please?" I breathed, shutting my eyes, feeling tears form.
Don tilted his head and rubbed the back of hi
s neck, deciding. Then he let go of my hand and walked around my bed. He climbed in and, staying on top of the covers, propped himself up on his side to face me. It felt like he was being very careful not to touch me.
"Now, go to sleep, please."
I took the arm that was pinned to his side and pulled it over to rest on my waist.
Don relaxed and scooted over until he was right up against me. I lifted my head, grabbed his other arm, and slid it under my head. Now his arms were around me, his head on the pillow, and his face right in front of mine.
"That's better," I whispered. "I've missed you."
His breath hitched, and he tried to control it. But he began to cry. "I . . . was . . . so
. . . scared." He said very slowly and gently hugged me closer.
"I know." I reached up and stroked his face while the tears that formed in my eyes started to spill over. He was hurting because I was hurting, and now I was hurting because he was.
He took a deep breath, but it was jagged. "Please try to go to sleep." His voice was still thick with sadness as he leaned his forehead against mine.
We needed to comfort each other before either of us would fall asleep, and I knew how I wanted to do that.
"Will you kiss me goodnight?"
Don's eyes opened wider as he searched mine. I guessed he was trying to see if that was what I really wanted. If so, he got his answer. He leaned his head over and gently touched his lips to mine.
He kissed me softly, but it was too much. I started to cry, and he tried to pull away. I assumed he thought he was hurting me. He wasn't. I turned toward him, threw my arm around his back, and clenched him to me as strongly as I could, which was still pretty weak.
He kissed me passionately, but we both cried. I knew he'd been so upset, so worried over the last week, but he tried to stay strong for me. Now that I was safely home, he could let himself grieve for what I went through, for what he went through with me because I did not go through it alone.
We fell asleep in each other's arms, and it was the best I'd ever slept. I didn't dream; I didn't toss or turn. I woke up in the same position that I was in when I fell asleep.
When I opened my eyes, Don had a blanket over him. I figured Melissa covered him up after we fell asleep, and I was glad she didn't make him get up.
