by Kiki Leach
“What does it matter? I was never to him what I have always been to you. Part of your soul.”
“The entirety of it.”
“What we have can never compare to anyone else. I’ve never felt losing you to anyone because --”
“You own me, my favorite girl.”
He looked away, crinkling his brows a bit, and thinking.
I wet the compress again and continued wiping the dirt from his skin.
“What you shared with him, Cinder --”
“It doesn’t matter,” I said.
“It shouldn’t. But this man shall be living inside my palace, riding beside me in battle, and he has been intimate with my wife. What is to keep me from slaughtering him in place of shaking his hand the moment my father introduces us to one another tomorrow?”
For a split second, I wondered if it was the best option for us both.
Then I shook the very idea of it from my head.
“Because you’re better than that,” I told him. “And it is exactly what your father would expect, react on impulse and it gives him a reason to dethrone you. Norvack, my love for you is immeasurable. What I shared with another man will never compare to that. I need you to understand that.”
He nodded a little and attempted to smile, but from the tense expression on his face, I wasn’t quite sure if he was convinced of my words. Or, if he was in fact convinced and didn’t care because he wished to slaughter John upon sight as he claimed, regardless of what I said.
“What happened to you tonight in the village?” I asked in an attempt to refocus on him.
He sat back and looked up at me.
“A crazed villager came to the cottage spewing something of a child, a baby or something.”
I stiffened. “What?”
“He kept saying a child was near, a child was near and in danger of something or someone. I assumed he meant a child was there, perhaps hiding from someone and snuck inside at some point, and so I searched all over but found no one. He wouldn’t stop babbling and so to shut him up, I sent my men into the village to search as well. But they never found any child, let alone one in danger.”
“A child was near and in danger?” I scrunched my face and moved away from him. “Did he say what kind of child? A baby or… or something? What did he look like?” I asked.
“Why are you so curious of this man, Cinder? Do his actions sound familiar to you?”
“No. I’m…” I frowned. “I mean, it’s possible he was the same man I encountered as a child. He was Gypsy, a fortune teller who begged to read my palms no matter how often I refused him. He wasn’t crazed, but a bit unconventional.”
“This man appeared crazed. And, he didn’t look of the Roma people--”
“Then perhaps you saw another man.”
“Or perhaps it was too dark for me to know for sure. And his ‘unconventional’ ways became more crazed over time. I only encountered him this evening and the only light within the cottage was a lantern.”
“Why would he come to the cottage?”
“I don’t know, Cinderella,” he said, his tone questioning. “Could it have been a chance he was expecting someone else? You, possibly?”
I turned back to him and tilted my head, ignoring his question in favor of my own.
“Why did you get into a scuffle with this man in the first place?”
“How young were you when you first encountered someone like him?”
“I don’t remember. What difference does it make?” I asked.
“None.”
“Then why bother?”
He leaned back and grinned wide, almost condescendingly. “There is so much I never realized I didn’t know about you. So much I missed during my time away in London.”
“We learn more about one another the more time we spend together. Perhaps you should stop leaving me in favor of spending time with your horse or your army or your father.” I looked at him from the corner of my eye. “Why did you get into a scuffle with this man, Norvack?”
“Are you concerned for his safety?”
“I’m concerned for your sanity.”
He quietly chortled to himself and nodded.
“Once I informed him that no child had been found in danger, he struck me in the chest and kept screaming otherwise. I attempted to remove him from the cottage without any harm, but I assumed he came looking for a fight and it’s what he received.”
“Why didn’t your men stop him from attacking you?”
“I told them not to.”
“Why?”
He paused.
“The man was looking for a fight, Cinder.”
“The man was looking for a child in danger.”
“There was no child!” he hollered.
“You don’t know that!”
He widened his eyes and dropped his mouth open. “Are you mad, woman? As mad as the man in that village tonight?”
“No. I just don’t understand why you felt the need to attack him.”
“Because he struck me.”
“And by the looks of it, it seemed as if he continued doing so. I don’t believe he came looking for a fight as much as you were. What exactly were you trying to prove tonight, Norvack? That you can take on any man? Was this about the Gypsy or about John?”
He grit his teeth. “Would you like for it to have been about John?”
“Don’t,” I snapped.
“I only asked a question.”
“That wasn’t a question, it was an accusation presented as one.”
Silence grew between us, as did the distance. I squeezed the now dry compress in my hand and bit my lip.
Norvack tightened his jaw and rattled his head a bit, annoyed.
“My apologies,” he said, dropping his hand to the bench. “You were right, it was an accusation and unnecessary of me --”
I cleared my throat to distract us both. “No one else in the village saw you tonight?”
He eyed me for a long moment in a curious manner, then turned away.
“I kept a low profile, as did my men. At least until then.”
“Why do you still go there? Even now?
He shrugged. “It’s my safe haven. No one need know.”
“Not even me?”
We stared at one another and he smiled a little, but never answered. And then I knew.
“It’s yours now, isn’t it? You’ve been taking care of it since the moment I left and have kept it as yours.”
“I kept it as ours.”
“It’s no longer mine.” I walked back over to him and almost hesitantly moved a strand of hair from his face. I slid the back of my fingers down his cheek and his smile deepened. “Well, while you were off pondering the meaning of life, I spent time with your mother preparing for tomorrow’s banquet.”
“Thrilling as always, I take it?”
“As always, Prince.”
“I understand your demeanor.”
“Hmm. Your mother is a treat and was in rare form today.”
“Was she?”
“Mm-hmm. She is so blindly devoted to your father it’s almost sickening.”
“Why almost?”
“Because on some level, I understand her reasoning’s.”
Norvack outstretched his hand. I wrapped an arm around his waist and helped him to the bed.
“I understand that her complete devotion to him is all she has. It’s all he expects from her and all he is willing to respect. It’s a shame she isn’t more like… well…”
“Like you?” he replied.
“No!” I squealed. He laughed as I placed him on the edge of the bed. “No, it’s a shame that she isn’t more willing to…” I stopped and took a deep breath and then swallowed hard. “Never mind.”
“No, go on.”
“It doesn’t matter. Your mother will never change when it comes to the king. If he were a more decent man, I wouldn’t feel as I do. Possibly.”
As Norvack lay back, he pulled me down toward his fa
ce a little, until our lips were just inches apart. His fingertips caressed my skin, his breath on my tongue made my head spin. My heart beat so fast, it felt as if tiny explosions were filling my chest. I became nervous all over again, flustered and confused; as if this man were not my husband, as if I had never seen him like this, or any other way before. It seemed only he could have this kind of affect on me. I both loved and loathed it.
“Thank you,” he said.
He leaned in to kiss the corner of my lips. I had the urge to turn my lips toward his, but didn’t.
“You should rest.” I held my breath and slightly leaned away from his affection.
He appeared disappointed, but attempted to smile through it.
It was the first of his being beside me in days.
And the first in which we didn’t face, or touch one another at all.
The Mystery
I closed my eyes tightly, but never slept. Instead, I thought of the Gypsy in the cottage and of his words to Norvack. I knew for certain that coming to my cottage was no mistake, it never had been, even when I was a child. And now he was telling my husband of a child in danger, and I couldn’t help but think of our own.
Norvack began rustling against the sheets. I opened my eyes wide and for the first time noticed that the sun had barely shined inside the room; it was hardly daybreak.
I turned on my back and began rubbing my eyes, feigning as if I had been sleeping soundlessly all night.
“Have you been awake this entire time?”
“No.” He answered quickly. Then shook his head. “Perhaps. I’m not sure.”
I rolled over to face him and tucked my hand beneath my cheek.
“John shall be arriving today,” he said, staring up at the ceiling as if he were preparing for it to drop on him at any moment.
“Yes.” I studied his face and demeanor as he grit his teeth and blinked rapidly. “How are you feeling this morning? Still in pain from last night?”
“I am prepared.”
I nodded. “Then you’re in no pain, and ready for whatever it is John plans to bring to your table?”
“I am prepared to fight for what is mine, as always.”
I visually examined his arm and ribs. They were still slightly bruised, but when I noticed him clinching his fists, I realized he was not in as much pain as he appeared to be.
“No one shall never have what belongs to you, Norvack; what always has and will. Certainly not John Devereux.”
He stared into my eyes for awhile, his jade green irises flickering with a sort of intensity, as if to repeat without words this time, that John shall never have me above all else.
As I reached for his face, the small cut behind his ear, he gently pulled away from me. I gradually dropped my hand to the bed, a small space between us, as if what he had just done hadn’t concerned me in any manner, and curled my fingers inside my hand, resting them between us on the bed.
We remained silent for a long while, so long it seemed as if the sun shifted past the clouds before either one of us said another word.
“What have we become?” he asked so curiously, his brows crinkled, jaw tightened.
I turned my head a little, confused. “I--”
“I wondered last night in the village and I spent most of the night wondering again. What have we become to one another?”
I shut my eyes momentarily and then knit my brows. “I don’t know.” I sighed. “We’re not the same people we were when we married just months ago, it seems. The outcome of the battle changed so much for us, for you. More than I realized at the time, I suppose.”
“Cinder--”
“I’m not blaming you for it, Norvack. The need to prove something to Belarus is…”
I stopped as I felt myself becoming over emotional in regard to this matter. I didn’t wish to bring it up again, I didn’t wish to repeat myself. And I certainly didn’t wish to distract him anymore, deter him from what mattered most today: maintaining his throne.
So I swallowed my words, and feelings, and grinned as hard as I could.
“No matter the distance between us, no matter what we have in fact become or may be in the future, you are still my husband.”
He looked over at me and lifted the corner of his mouth into a grin.
“And you, my favorite girl, my wife. Forever.”
I reached out for his face again and traced my fingers around his lips.
“I miss you,” I said. “More than you shall ever know.”
He took my hand and guided my index finger into his mouth. I shivered as he swirled his tongue around it.
“I’ve missed you, too,” he murmured; there was a small growling sound to his voice that made me ache between my thighs.
He kissed my palm then moved in and kissed my forehead, and for the first time in what felt like forever, I felt safe again. I felt as if I were home once more, as if he were my home once more. And I wished to tell him everything, why I had pulled away from him, why we hadn’t made love in so long. In that moment, I no longer felt distant from him; I no longer felt as if we were married strangers who once shared the greatest of all loves, and had no more left to give to one another.
I placed my hand on his chest and swirled my fingers around the tiny hairs. He bent down to kiss the tip of my nose, and then my lips, and I melted into him. As he moved atop me, lightly spreading my legs with his knee, I dug my fingers into the nape of his neck and moaned.
“Norvack,” I said softly.
He kissed my neck and squeezed either side of my pelvis with the tips of his fingers. His breath was warm against my skin, his lips as soft as rose petals. I draped my legs around him and he attempted to lift my gown.
“Norvack,” I said again. “Norvack, I -- I wish to inform you of something before we go further.”
He covered my mouth with his lips and swirled his tongue around my own. I fluttered against his and slid my hands down his back, tracing the tiny beads of sweat that began to form on his skin.
“There is no need to inform me of a thing, my favorite,” he replied between my lips. His cock expanded against my thigh and my leg twitched.
“I wish…” I turned from his mouth to catch my breath. “I wish that were true. Believe me when I say how much I wish that were true.”
“What do you wish to inform me of, Cinder?”
I hinted the frustration in his voice.
“I… We…” I stopped once more and grinded my teeth.
He furrowed his brows a little and slowly began to move away from me, dropping his hands from my pelvis and to the bed, shifting his cock away from me. I couldn’t bear the thought of leaving things as we had before. I wanted to belong to him again in the same manner I had when we first made love. And I so desperately needed for him to be mine, only mine as he had for so long. So I smiled and shook my head, pretending as if I were being silly about it all.
“It is nothing,” I told him. “Nothing more important than us now. All you should take in at this very moment, is me.”
His eyes beamed like the flames of a candle and he lifted the gown above my head, tossing it to the floor.
We made love twice that morning before the queen came searching for him, and Brigita came searching for me.
The Distraction
I stared at myself in the mirror and flinched at every tug of my gown. The queen remained across the room, waiting with me as Norvack prepared down the hall.
She observed me dressing, while visually and verbally scrutinizing every inch of what I had planned to wear for the banquet, from my gown, to my jewelry, to my hair and shoes. I wore my hair up to please her but in pleasing myself, I refused to wear an enormous headdress the size of the palace.
She leaned her head aside and made a face.
“You’re to dress in a different manner for the more private celebration tomorrow night,” she said.
“I’m aware, as you seem to disapprove of this entire ensemble. Perhaps a pair of Norvack’s trousers and th
e king’s crown will do, if it can manage to fit over such a monstrosity as this.”
I pat my hair down and she rolled her eyes upward, sucking in her cheeks, exasperated. Brigita snickered and unconsciously yanked at the laces of my gown.
“Oof!” I hollered. I looked aside and squint a little. “Not so tight.”
She widened her eyes and quickly nodded.
“Yes, mistress.”
The queen stepped up. “It shall be as tight as possible.”
“Tight enough.” I placed a hand on my stomach. “I wish to breathe tonight despite your wishes otherwise.”
“Nonsense!” She looked down at my hand and arched a brow. “You seem a bit unsettled.”
“I’m fine,” I told her.
“You don’t appear it.”
“Perhaps you’re in need of a new set of eyes.”
“Perhaps you shall be in need of a new set of lips once I rip the insufferable pair currently taking place on your face.” She looked into my eyes and smirked. “Mistress.”
I stood straight and cleared my throat. “That was quite clever,” I replied. “More so shocking that it came from you and not the king. Or from myself.”
“I’ve spent enough time with you to embrace your way with words, Cinderella.”
“Ah. When you can manage to use them against me?”
She grinned. “Yes.”
Brigita stepped away from me and I tightened the laces at the base of my back.
“The rubies?” she asked.
“The diamonds,” Eliza interjected.
“The rubies,” I told her. I looked over at Eliza, who frowned. “They’re Norvack’s favorite. And the diamonds are not appropriate for this occasion or this gown.”
“Diamonds are appropriate for any occasion and gown, and you shall wear them tonight. Norvack can see you in rubies during breakfast, for God’s sake!”
“For a woman so determined for her son to obliterate the honoree, you seem to be putting much more effort into this than I would’ve imagined.”
“This effort is for us, my dear. My son shall eliminate John as his men phenomenally eliminated the English army. It does not mean we shall appear downtrodden in the meantime, nor victorious as if we have already won the battle.”
Eliza went over to my bed and opened a large, rectangular shaped box containing a large necklace covered in tiny diamonds and matching oval shaped earrings. She picked up the necklace very carefully and walked back over to me, grinning as she slid it around my neck. I was reminded of a snake slithering up and down my spine and it made me shudder. Once clasped, she stepped back and clapped her hands together.
