by Jules Wake
‘But?’
She pursed her lips.
‘What happened to the girl who kept telling me I had to go out and make things happen. Keep knocking on doors and not give up. That’s what kept me going that first year in Hollywood. I was so …’ he paused, a bleak look crossing his face, ‘lonely.’
‘Lonely? You didn’t look lonely.’ She wished she hadn’t said that, it sounded bitter and jealous. ‘I mean, you seemed very happy.’
‘I had to. Trying to impress agents, producers, directors, casting agents.’ Richard grabbed her hand. ‘I missed you every single day. I didn’t give up on you. You know how the game’s played. Those pictures were publicity.’
She steeled herself to say it, her head dropping to study his hand still caressing hers with that rhythmic stoke. ‘Even the one of Natalie Howe.’
His voiced gentled and he pulled her hand towards him, forcing her to lift her head. ‘We were working together. It suited the publicity machine to team us up. It developed later.’
His mouth drooped, sadness etched in his downturned curve. ‘After you said that we should go our separate ways.’
‘It was for the best.’ Was she trying to convince herself or him?
‘For whom?’
Had she imagined that slight break in his voice?
‘For both of us.’ Why did this still hurt so much? ‘You wouldn’t be where you are now, would you?’ She’d done it for him.
‘True, but at what cost?’ He turned away and slipped his sunglasses down over his face.
He was the one who had been more successful, he was the one who had made it. Why did she feel so full of guilt?
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
‘Another drink?’ asked Richard.
Carrie cast a look at the skyline and the lowering sun. Early evening beckoned and she’d been out all day. ‘Don’t you have to drive?’
‘I’ve already texted Phil and put him on standby.’
Carrie laughed. ‘How lovely to have people on standby. I ought to get back. Angela and Jade.’
‘They’re big girls now. Besides, Phil tells me that Angela says I’m invited for dinner.’
‘He does, does he?’ Carrie rolled her eyes but she was having such a wonderful time, she didn’t want to cut it short. Sitting on the balcony in her new dress, with a big fancy rope-handled shopping bag at her feet, with great company, champagne and in one of the best seats in St Tropez. What was not to like? Or enjoy.
‘And you’re not working tonight?’
‘No, they don’t need me. I’ve got an early start tomorrow and I’ve got to be on set all day. Tomorrow’s going to be hectic but you should come over sometime and watch. You could bring Jade and Angela.’
‘God, Jade would love that. She’s very miffed that she’s not allowed to say she’s met you.’
‘Why can’t she?’
‘I guess she can now. When you first came over …’
‘All you need to say is that we’re old friends from drama school.’
‘True.’
‘But if you did want to tell anyone I’m your husband, I’d be cool with it.’ He leaned back, his arms folded, a smile playing at his lips as if he’d manoeuvred the queen on a chessboard into an unassailable position.
‘I’m sure you would. But “old friends” will do.’
‘Coward,’ he grinned, motioning the waiter over. ‘Can we have another two Bellinis, please?’
Carrie felt too replete and relaxed to respond to his teasing.
When Phil pulled up outside, with her third Bellini swirling deliciously inside her, Carrie had persuaded herself that ‘old friends’ described them well. She’d enjoyed spending the day with Richard. Perhaps he’d been right, spending this time together, re-establishing their friendship before they got divorced, was a good thing to do. They could part with good memories instead of bad ones.
‘Oh my God, you’ve got a new dress. That’s not fair.’ Jade pounced as soon as they walked through the front door and then, all smiles, turned to Richard. ‘Thank you for the invitation. Who’s going to be there? I hear F.J. Franklin is in town.’
Behind Jade’s back, Carrie mouthed, ‘Who?’
‘Is he?’ asked Richard. ‘I’ll have to ask my people to see if he’s free that night.’
‘You have people?’ Jade’s eyes widened. ‘That is sooo cool. And I’m so screwed. I don’t have anything decent to wear.’ She poked at Carrie’s large boutique bag with its gold rope handles. ‘What’s in the bag?’
‘I,’ Carrie emphasised the ‘I’, ‘bought a dress today. Two new dresses.’ She did a quick twirl and opened up the bag for Jade to take a peek.
‘For the party.’
‘I’ll wear it then, yes.’
‘Damn! I need a new dress. Mum!’ Jade yelled and raced off.
‘People?’ Carrie shot Richard her best class-teacher reproving glare.
‘Sorry,’ with a self-deprecating lift of his hands, he added, ‘I didn’t think Jade would be impressed with a virtual assistant called, Arla. “People” sounds a lot better. But who the hell is F.J. Franklin?’
‘I think he’s a rapper,’ interjected Phil from behind them.
‘Figures,’ said Carrie. ‘Jade likes that shouty type of music.’
‘Knowing Arla, she’ll have a hotline to someone who knows him.’
‘Phil, thank you for coming to get us.’
‘It was no trouble,’ his eyes twinkled, ‘particularly as I was here anyway and your sister had kindly invited me to dinner.’ He paused. ‘She’s struggling today. I helped out.’ Then he added, ‘Not a problem is it, Mr Maddox, if I eat with you?’
‘Enough of the Mr Maddox crap, Phil. You know damn well it’s not a problem at all. Especially not if you’ve been doing the cooking.’
‘Jolly good, I’ll go and help Angie in the kitchen, then. We’ve been experimenting with a nice onion soup. Just got the toast and cheese to finish off.’
Angie? And an admission of weakness. Carrie blinked and stared after Phil disappearing back to the kitchen.
During dinner, Richard received an eyeful of the full family dynamics, with the added entertainment of Angela and suitor. Carrie watched, open-mouthed, as her sister and Phil flirted. Angela, light-hearted and giggly in a way she’d not seen before. In contrast Jade was at her most annoying, continually asking Richard who’d be at the party, what she should wear and whether she’d be allowed to drink or not.
Although her questions irritated the hell out of Carrie, Richard engaged in a full-scale discussion on suitable attire for the party and agreed to make sure that the bar staff stocked Jade’s favourite tipple, Wicked.
In a swift sea change of conversation, Richard then talked to Angela about a restaurant he’d visited in Mexico, describing the flavours, the ingredients, bringing them to life for her. Throughout the evening, Carrie could tell he’d enjoyed himself, but found herself wondering whether when he went back to his normal life, this would be a tiny diversion in the road. She doubted that meeting up with her and her family would have quite the same impact as he’d had on their lives.
The next morning Carrie received a text from an unknown number.
Hi this is Arla. Richard has asked me to fix up a dress for your niece Jade for the party. I’ve arranged for someone to drop off a selection of dresses for Jade to try on this morning. Hope that’s OK?
Carrie nearly dropped the phone. It was only nine-thirty. Arla worked fast. What time was it in America?
She found Jade in the pool.
‘Did you know Richard has arranged for some dresses to be delivered here today for you to try on?’
‘What?’ Jade’s muffled voice came from the swimming pool as she attempted to blow up one of the panels of the airbed without getting off the thing. It looked a decidedly dangerous manoeuvre, one that Carrie itched to help with and tip her annoying niece into the water.
‘Sorry, I’m trying to blow this up, it’s leaking water, which is goi
ng right down my pants and it’s cold.’
‘Richard’s PA has arranged for some dresses.’
‘Fuck me!
‘Language, young lady!’
‘Sorry but, that’s amazing. You need to stick with him. He’s a keeper.’
Carrie turned her back on Jade, bending to brush a stone from her foot.
‘Don’t give me that look.’
‘I’ve got my back to you, how can you see my look?’ She sounded as bad as Jade.
‘I just know,’ crowed Jade.
‘He’s not a keeper,’ Carrie stood on the pool’s edge, one hip thrust out, ‘he’s a multi-million-dollar movie star, who has women all over the world adoring him. We’re old friends. Who got married when we were far too young and stupid.’
‘He looks as if he still likes you … a lot. When you’re not looking at him, he looks as if he could eat you whole in one delicious gulp. I don’t know why you don’t give him a chance.’
Carrie tried to hang on to her patience and remind herself that teenagers spoke before they thought.
‘It’d be so cool to be able to tell everyone he’s my uncle.’
‘Well, he isn’t,’ snapped Carrie.
‘Technically he is, at the moment.’
‘Technically, not for much longer.’
‘I think you’re mad. Mum thinks he’s lovely too.’
Carrie considered it a good day when she only fancied herself strangling Jade once in an hour. Today just turned into a very bad day.
‘Why is it that everyone has forgotten that I’m engaged to Alan?’ Carrie stomped off.
Jade’s squeals later that afternoon were all Carrie needed to tell her that a delivery had arrived. She stirred from her chair on her balcony. She ought to go and show some enthusiasm, but she’d rather enjoyed a few hours of peace on her own. She’d spent a few hours day-dreaming away, during which the germ of an idea for a new play popped into her head, making her remember that she ought to ring Andrew. Richard’s words about her not trying hard enough to get her play put on stung.
She worked full time, and these days had other commitments. Richard didn’t understand. It wasn’t as if he lived real life.
Her phone beeped. Had Richard got the day off, after all? She wriggled in her seat, stretching her arm out lazily to pick up her phone, already trying to anticipate his latest instructions. Where would they be going next? Yesterday would take some beating, although the beach had been wonderful and he had promised her a drive in the Ferrari. Had he meant it?
With a delicious sense of anticipation, she opened up her texts.
Another fantastic day’s cycling. Perhaps we could honeymoon in the Alps. The scenery is spectacular and it would be out of season for skiing, there’ll be plenty of cheap accommodation.
Carrie frowned. Not her idea of a holiday and certainly not a honeymoon. Poor Alan, she’d really not given him much thought. What was she playing at? She shouldn’t have let Richard kiss her again yesterday.
Or we could go somewhere hot and exotic and laze on a beach!!! She texted back guiltily.
That’s what one did on honeymoons, wasn’t it? Or you went to Blackpool for the night and ate chicken and chips on the beach at midnight after three consecutive rides on the big dipper.
Where do you fancy? I’m open to suggestions. And I can see the pros of seeing you on a beach in a bikini.
Blimey, he was obviously missing her. She should count her blessings. What a lovely man, especially when she knew he would far rather be cycling up some one-in-four incline than lazing on a beach. Definitely a keeper and she’d do well to remember that.
Carrie emerged from her room to investigate the source of the excitement and came face to face with a full-scale fashion show taking place in the lounge.
‘What do you think?’ Jade did a catwalk strut down the length of the room.
‘Very nice.’ And totally unsuitable, but Carrie caught Angela’s silent signal and knew better than to say what she really thought.
‘Nice! It’s the bomb.’
‘How many dresses came?’ asked Carrie, looking at the explosion of fabric and colour, tissue paper and expensive carrier bags piled on the sofas.
‘Ten! And shoes.’ Jade clapped her hands. ‘Two pairs.’
‘Let’s see them all, then.’ Carrie sank onto what felt like the only clear space in the room, on the corner of the coffee table.
‘Anyone want a drink?’ asked Angela, with a surreptitious wink at Carrie.
‘Yes, please.’ From the amused twist to her sister’s lips, she was going to need one.
‘I’ll make it a large one.’ Angela sailed out of the room with the speed of a motor launch at full throttle.
A full hour and fifteen minutes later, Carrie felt ready to tear every last hair out of every last follicle on her head. Jade hadn’t been able to narrow down her choice by a single dress.
Arla was obviously used to far more sophisticated teens. Only a couple of the dresses had more than a nodding acquaintance with subtlety, which of course made them twice as appealing to Jade. The styles ranged from figure-hugging bandage dresses, strappy bias-cut dresses that dipped and fell in all the right places, or if you were Jade’s mother, the wrong places and micro minis so short, one false move and an open invitation would be made to all and sundry.
‘Wasn’t that kind of Richard?’ said Angela, an hour later.
Carrie rolled her eyes. ‘Very but I’m exhausted. Although all he had to do was send a message to his PA. She’s the one that did all the hard work,’ Carrie smirked. ‘And you.’
Angela sighed. ‘I’ve had practice.’
‘You’re a master now.’ Carrie had to hand it to her sister, her handling of Jade’s dress choices had been a masterclass in damning with faint praise.
‘The mistake is to say you don’t like something or it’s unsuitable. You’re dead in the water, then.’ Angela raised her glass and they chinked them together.
‘Telling her that the silver-and-black bandage dress made her bum look a tiny bit big was genius.’
‘Mm,’ Angela laughed, ‘Never worked with you. You didn’t care what anyone thought. I remember Mum trying that type of reverse psychology when you brought a ratty old fur coat back from the second-hand clothes shop in Berkhamsted.’
‘Oh my God, yes.’ Carrie imitated her mother’s tones, ‘Any self-respecting prostitute would love that coat.’
‘Funny, you used to dress quite flamboyantly.’
‘It doesn’t go down that well in school.’
‘Even so …’ Angela looked her up and down. ‘I used to envy you that vintage, boho style. It suited you.’ She tugged at her own dress. ‘If you’re not careful, you’re going to end up as boring as me.’
‘You’re not boring.’
‘Hmm, you’ve both got new dresses for the party. Maybe, I should have dropped some hints to Richard.’ Angela’s teasing smile made Carrie laugh. ‘Although I’m not sure I’d want him guessing what size I am.’
‘You’re tiny,’ protested Carrie. ‘You wouldn’t want him choosing for you.’ She knew her sister well. She preferred to melt into the background. With a taste towards well-cut tailored dresses that showed off her petite, trim figure and tiny waist, Angela preferred to look neat and smart. Carrie could almost guarantee her sister would wear her favourite navy blue and cream sleeveless shift dress.
‘True. Some of those …’ she shuddered. ‘I ought to get them packed up and shipped off in case Jade changes her mind and decides to go for the kingfisher blue, slashed-to-the-crotch one.’
‘What do you want to do tomorrow?’ asked Carrie after dinner that evening, conscious that she ought to offer to take Angela and Jade out for the day. There’d been no word from Richard. It would do him good to see that she’d already made plans. Show him he couldn’t expect her to drop everything for him.
Angela swallowed. ‘Er … Phil offered to take us to Port Grimaud. You’re very welcome to come too.’
/> ‘No,’ Carrie ignored the sudden pang of illogical emotion. She didn’t need to ask Carrie’s permission but she couldn’t quite shake off the sense of being usurped. ‘I’ll be fine. Have a day to myself.’ She could write. Swim. Take the car out. Explore. Lots to do. She’d enjoy being on her own. It would make a nice change.
‘Aren’t you seeing lover boy?’ asked Jade, looking up from her phone.
‘No,’ said Carrie, a touch more waspishly than she’d intended.
‘Oooh!’
Carrie gritted her teeth at Jade’s sing-song teasing.
‘Why not?’
Because Richard hadn’t texted. Carrie pushed her phone further out of reach. She’d turned into Jade, checking it every five minutes.
‘You haven’t had an argument have you?’ Worry lined Jade’s face.
‘No.’ It felt good to be childish back. ‘It’s okay Cinders, you will still get to the ball.’
‘Phew.’ Jade went back to her phone, tapping away. ‘I was worried for a minute, but then being an important movie star, he’s in big demand. I expect he has loads more important people to see than you. Do you think he’s got a girlfriend? I bet he goes out on dates all the time, don’t you think?’
‘I’ve no idea,’ said Carrie, her vocal chords taut as she bit out the words.
‘Yeah, he’s bound to have a couple of supermodels tucked away somewhere.’ Jade flashed her a cheeky grin.
‘And just this morning you were saying he liked me.’
‘Yeah, I think he does.’ Jade’s expression sobered and she shrugged. ‘But, be honest, you’re a school teacher in Hertfordshire and he’s a hot-shot actor who lives in LA. If he had to choose, he’s going to stick with supermodels. Stands to reason.’
‘Thanks, Jade.’ Carrie swallowed her wine in one hurried gulp.
Two seconds later her phone beeped and she snatched it up, trying to tell herself it was only Alan.
Can you be ready in ten? Rx
She jumped up from the table, catching her cutlery and sending it clattering across her plate.
‘I’m going out. Richard’s picking me up.’
Before Angel and Jade could ask her a single question, she darted away to her room, her heart singing with sudden happiness.
