by Dena Christy
She fled to her room, and closed the door behind her, hoping that would put an end to their painful conversation.
Chapter 7
Lee’s jaw tightened as Simone left the room. He stared at the spot she’d so recently vacated. He couldn’t believe what she was doing to herself to hold her transition into a werewolf at bay. Robert Granger needed his ass kicked for giving her that script, but Lee didn’t think it would do any good. He was a glorified drug pusher, always had been. Lee stood and put their dishes in the sink. He glanced in the direction Simone had gone. They needed to finish this discussion, otherwise it would fester like a wound between them.
He took a deep breath as he walked down the hall toward her room. He hadn’t handled knowing she’d been sedating herself well at all. When he went to talk to her this time, he had to remind himself to be more understanding. He had no idea what she’d gone through since he’d had his entire life to get used to being a werewolf. And he’d known he would go through the transition, and what to expect from it years before it’d happened.
The David O'Connell he remembered, while he’d considered him a friend, hadn’t been the most patient person, and Lee was sure that he hadn’t provided Simone with the tools she needed to go through the transition herself.
Her door was shut, and he lifted his hand and held it in front of the door for a moment. Did he really want to get into this with her? He tapped the knuckle of his index finger on the door, and silence answered his knock.
“Simone?” he said.
“What do you want,” came her muffled reply.
“Can I come in?” he asked, his hand poised above the knob. He hoped she said yes, because he didn’t have the heart to force this conversation, despite knowing that it needed to happen.
“Fine,” she said, and he turned the knob and eased the door open. She sat on the end of her bed, with her face turned away from him. “What is it?”
“I think we need to finish this. We have to live here together for the foreseeable future, and it will be a lot more comfortable if we aren’t walking on egg shells with each other.”
“Are we going to fight more?” she asked, her voice tight as her face remained turned from him.
He stepped further into the room, and her hand came up to swipe at her cheek. He closed his eyes for a second as regret pushed heavily against his chest. The last thing he’d wanted to do was make her cry. He came around to sit beside her on the bed.
She kept her face averted. He reached out, put his fingers under her chin and gently turned her face toward his. As he suspected, wet streaks covered her face and her eyes were slightly red.
“I don’t want to fight with you,” he said softly.
“It didn’t seem that way earlier. As soon as I got to the kitchen, it seemed like you were itching for a fight.”
“I know, and I’m sorry. I spent too much time last night stewing over everything, and unfortunately you bore the brunt of it.” She nodded, but remained silent as the remnants of her tears caused her breath to shudder. “Please talk to me.”
“What do you want me to say? You know what I do during the full moon and have made your feelings on that clear.”
“What happened during your first full moon?” he asked, realizing that if she was ever going to get past her fear of the transition she needed to talk about what happened her first time. “Please help me understand why you’re afraid.”
She tensed beside him, and he reached out and took her hand in his. She glanced over at him and her shoulders relaxed as she took a deep breath.
“I got stuck,” she said.
Lee’s heart stopped for a moment, and he wanted to make sure she was saying what he thought she was.
“What do you mean by stuck?” he asked as his thumb ran lazy circles over her hand.
“David dumped me on Granger’s doorstep after he attacked me. Honestly, I don’t know why he bothered. I suppose it could have been worse, he could have left me in a ditch somewhere. Have you ever seen someone go through the change from human to werewolf?”
Lee’s jaw tightened for a moment. “Yes, and it’s a horrible thing to watch.”
“Well, you can imagine what it’s like to go through it. I think I would have died if David had abandoned me completely. Robert helped me make it through what turned out to be the most hellish and painful experience of my life. I think he was just as surprised as David was that I survived.”
“You are rare, in that you survived the change at all,” he said. “What happened when the full moon came?”
“I was like a child in the middle of a custody battle, a child that neither parent wanted. Robert thought he’d done enough, and David wouldn’t answer any of Robert’s calls. I tried to find him, but he kept on the move.”
“You mean to tell me that he attacked you, turned you into a werewolf and yet didn’t have the decency to help you through your first full moon?” Lee ground his back teeth, but tried to keep his voice as neutral as possible. She had finally opened up to him about what it had been like for her, and he didn’t want to discourage that. He couldn’t believe how irresponsible David had been. It showed Lee how little he’d really known the man.
“That’s exactly it. Robert didn’t really want to have much to do with it either since he said he hadn’t turned me so why should he have to clean up more of David’s mess. He dropped me off at a motel so he could confront David, and his timing was bad,” she said as her hand tightened in his.
“How bad,” Lee asked as his heart rate picked up speed.
She took in a deep shuddering breath, and for a moment he feared she wouldn’t go on. She looked up at him and her eyes had filled with tears again. “Oh Simone,” he said as he drew her against him, and her cheek rested on his bare shoulder.
“I thought I was dying. I was in so much pain and I didn’t know what to do, and he left me there. My body changed, but I couldn’t complete it and I couldn’t get back. By the time Robert showed up, I was so panicked and scared that I couldn’t do anything but lie there, screaming as half my body was human and the other half was wolf. He had to knock me out, and eventually my body went back to its human form.”
Lee closed his eyes and cursed under his breath. Going through a first transition was painful and frightening enough when things went smoothly. He could understand why she wanted to avoid going through it again.
“You haven’t tried it since? What if you had someone there for you, to guide you through it?” he asked. She needed to get over this fear she had of turning into her wolf form because drugging herself every full moon would only hurt her in the long run.
She pushed away from him and stood in one agitated movement. Her hands shook as she dragged them through her hair. “I can’t Lee. Can’t you see that? I didn’t want this, I never asked for it.”
“I know, but drugging yourself isn’t the answer. Surely you can see that,” Lee said.
“Then I’ll find another way to cope,” she said, and Lee stood to turn her to face him.
“What does that mean?”
“I don’t know,” she said as she sighed. “I can’t deal with this right now. I have to find your father, and I haven’t even tried to contact him.”
Lee was silent for a moment as he looked at her. Talking of her going through the transition only agitated her and talking about his father would only agitate him. It would appear they were at an impasse, but something had nagged at him since she’d come back into his life. It would bother him until he asked her.
“Why did you really leave me?” he said as he took a step closer to her. He must be a glutton for punishment because her breath fanned against his bare skin but he could not make himself put any distance between them.
“What?” she asked as a puzzled frown drew her brows together. “Lee, I told you why. Do we really need to rehash this?”
“Was it because I’m a werewolf?” he asked, refusing to let the subject drop. From the moment she’d come back into his life she�
�d thrown around words like monster when referring to herself, and he couldn’t help but wonder if she’d seem him in that light too.
“Lee,” she sighed as she reached up to caress the side of his face. “I told you that I didn’t want to cause a rift in your family. I meant it. We both know that your father would never have accepted me, and at the time I thought I was doing the right thing by stepping aside. It had nothing to do with who you are. What would make you think that?”
“Because from what I can see, you hate that you’re a werewolf now and I can’t help thinking that maybe there was more to your leaving than the lack of my father’s blessing.”
“There is a difference between you and me. You were born a werewolf, and you can’t help that any more than you can help having blue eyes and dark hair. You were a werewolf when we met, and although I didn’t know it, my feelings didn’t change for you when I knew.”
“Then why can’t you show yourself the same acceptance?” he asked, and she turned and spun away from him.
“Because I wasn’t meant to be this,” she said. “This was forced on me. Don’t you get it? What David, and by extension your father did, was kill the woman I was before. They turned me into this, and I was given no choice.”
“I know all that, but you will have to move forward with your life,” Lee said, and he could tell by the closed look on her face that she wasn’t listening to what he was saying.
“I will when he’s dead,” she said, and her voice sounded nothing like the Simone he once knew.
“What your doing, it will destroy you,” he said, knowing that what he was saying wouldn’t make an impression on her. “It’s starting already. You are drugging yourself to avoid the change.”
“You know why that is,” she said as she stepped up to him and pointed her finger in his chest. “You have no idea what I feel, or what I think.”
“Well, I’m glad to hear that you feel something, because I was wondering,” he said as he trapped her hand against his chest. She tugged her hand, but he only tightened his grip. She looked up at him and he saw that her pupils had dilated. He tugged her forward so that her body was flush against his. “Tell me what you feel now,” he said as he lowered his head and his lips hovered above hers.
“Lee,” she whispered and the sound of it had the blood rushing through his veins. He lowered his head the fraction of an inch it needed to go, and he kissed her for the first time in a year.
She tasted the same as she always had, but holding her again aroused him more than it ever had before. It could be the year apart, or that she was one of his own kind now, but he’d never wanted her as much as he did now. He deepened the kiss as his arms went around her and he pulled her tighter against him.
She fit against him so perfectly, and he now knew how much his body had missed hers. The separation from her hadn’t diminished his feelings for her, and the thought caused caution to creep into his brain. He slowly eased her away from him, his lips still clinging to hers as if they had a mind of their own.
“What…” she mumbled as her eyes drifted open.
He turned his head away, he couldn’t look at her when she looked like that, otherwise he’d be tempted to pick her up, put her on the bed and make love to her as he long to. But for both their sakes, they needed to take this slow. Her life was already so complicated, and he didn’t want to complicate it further if it wasn’t something she wanted.
“I’m going to go, get dressed and go into work,” he said as he took a step back from her.
“Work? Am I missing something,” she asked, confusion apparent on her face.
“I don’t think this is a good thing to get into right now. Both of our emotions are running high, and we shouldn't start something we will regret,” he said as he turned away from her and went toward the door.
“Lee,” she said behind him as his hand touch the knob on the door.
He didn’t turn to look at her because if he did his resolve would fly right out the window and he would have her naked underneath him in under five minutes. It wasn’t what she needed, and although his body would argue otherwise, he didn’t really need it either. Her leaving him a year ago had left a wound, and he wasn’t ready to open it up again.
“Yes,” he said as he stared at the door. She sighed and for a moment he thought she wouldn’t speak.
“I guess I’ll see you later?” she asked.
“I’ll be home in time for dinner,” he said as he quickly opened the door and left the room before he said to hell with it and did what his body was screaming at him to do.
* * *
Dany sat down on the sofa and sighed with relief when no dirt or dust came pouring out of the thing. True to his word his new friend Smith sent a rather meaty, taciturn woman over the day after his visit. She identified herself as Mrs. Perkins, said a man named Smith sent her to clean for him. At first he didn’t want to let her in, but she refused to budge off the porch until he’d stepped aside. She’d only spoken in terse one or two word sentences, but she’d quickly set the place to rights. Now, while it didn’t offer all the comforts of his former home, she’d eliminated the dust and vermin.
He half expected agents from the Order to turn up after her visit, but Mrs. Perkins,—besides being a wonderful cleaner—was discreet . There was something strange about her though. For a second, Dany thought she smelled almost identical to Smith, but he dismissed the notion. Perhaps she’d gotten Smith’s scent on her when he’d hired her, and that was what Dany detected. He found in the past few months his condition caused his senses to get out of whack.
He stood and walked to the window, looking out at the woods with a longing he’d suppressed for a long time. The full moon last night had been torturous for him. He still felt the urge to change, to run, but he couldn’t due to his degenerating condition. He might as well be human, for really now that was all he was.
He’d once been a fearsome creature, someone who held power in the palm of his hand and wasn’t afraid to wield it. How far he’d fallen. His power was gone, he was hiding out like a rat in a sewer and he couldn’t even find comfort in the ability to become a wolf and run.
“Don’t tell me this is the maudlin phase of the plan,” a voice said behind him, and Dany jumped. He turned to see Smith nonchalantly lounging on the couch with his feet up on the coffee table.
“How did you get in here?” Dany asked.
“The usual way,” Smith said as he picked a magazine off the coffee table and thumbed through it. “Continue with what your doing. Gazing out the window, feeling sorry for yourself is so productive.”
“What do you want me to do? I’m stuck here, in hiding, without people and without resources.”
“You could start by answering your phone,” Smith said as he continued to flip through the magazine.
“What are you talking about, my phone isn’t—” Dany broke off as his cell phone vibrated on the counter. He looked at Smith, who sighed and closed the magazine, flipping it on to the coffee table. He motioned toward the phone, and Dany approached the counter as if his phone contained an explosive that would go off at any moment. The phone stopped vibrating, and he looked at the screen to see he had one missed call. The number looked familiar, and he racked his brain to figure out who’d called.
“Are you going to stare at it all day?”
“Who would call me? I know that number somehow, but I thought you said my people all died.”
“I said all but one died. You were just complaining your lack of people and resources and here is your opportunity to get both those things.”
Dany looked at his phone, his brows drawing together as he searched his memory for that familiar number. He scrolled through his call list, and the last call he’d received on his phone, by that number, was on the same day he’d taken Kate Townsend.
“Alicia,” he said, and he set the phone down. He’d never met her, and apart from a few phone calls to discuss the running of the warehouse, he had had little contact
with her. He hadn’t even hired her directly, he’d just let David O’Connell bring her in. Suspicion curled in his stomach. Why was she, his newest employee, one he hadn’t had a hand in hiring himself, the only one the Order had left alive.
“Are you going to contact her?” Smith asked as he stretched out on the couch.
“Why would the Order spare her, and no one else?” Dany asked.
“Who knows the answer to that. Perhaps she got out before they got there,” Smith said, yawning.
It was plausible that Alicia hadn’t gotten caught by the Order at all. She was the one who’d warned him that the Order was at the warehouse. Still his instincts were telling him that something wasn’t right about all this.
Smith stood and stretched. “As exciting as all this worrying is, I have better things to do with my time then watching you think. My suggestion is that you make contact, even if you just send her a text. You really have nothing to lose at this point. No one knows where you are, so you’re safe for now. Talk to her, get a read on her, and if there is something not right about this, then ditch the phone.”
“It seems a little too convenient that she’s the only one still alive. What is she going to do for me?”
“You won’t know until you make contact, but suit yourself,” Smith said as he walked to the front door, opened it and walked out.
Dany watch him go, disappointment sinking in his stomach. Smith was his only contact with the outside world, and although he loathed to admit it, Dany was tired of spending all his time cooped up in this cabin.
He walked over to his phone and stared at Alicia’s number. It tempted him, it truly did. Maybe she would be all he would need. With a female werewolf, he could rebuild his life and his bloodlines. His son Lee was a lost cause, and Dany intended to avenge his son’s betrayal. Lee had made it clear that he’d chosen the Order over his own flesh and blood. He had no son now. All the boy was now was one more enemy to eliminate. And with that thought in his head, Dany reached for his phone.
