by Lola StVil
“Well, I am incredibly handsome,” he replies.
“East, is that you?” I tease.
“Ha-ha. I’ll see you soon. Love you,” he says.
“Love you too. Hey, Randy?”
“Yeah?”
“You haven’t seen any butterflies, have you?”
“No. But I did do something that may upset you—a little.”
“What?”
“Okay, but first you have to promise not to kill me.”
“No such luck. Randy, spill it.”
“I went to see my mom.”
“What? I told you I would go with you.”
“I know, but I just had to see her.”
“Argh, I could strangle you.”
“Later, but right now do you want to hear how it went?”
“Yeah, tell me.”
“It was great! She was so nice. She looks just like I remembered her, except she’s a little older. She has a few wrinkles and stuff, but she’s still really pretty. She has short curly hair, and now she wears glasses.”
“What did she have to say for herself?” I ask.
“The first thing she said was that she loved me and that leaving me was the hardest thing she had to do. But she left because she thought she sucked as a mom. She had crippling anxiety about letting her family down. She was trying to be super mom, and she’d get depressed and stuff when things went wrong. She realized that she wasn’t meant to be a mom.”
“Not meant to be a mom—what does that mean?”
“Yeah, that upset me too. But then she explained that she realized way too late that kids were not part of her plans. She said she was just being what everyone wanted her to be. And when she realized motherhood wasn’t for her, it was too late.”
“And how do you feel about that? Did you tell her off?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“Pry, I was angry at first. I thought she didn’t want me. But now I know the problem wasn’t me. It was her. She left for her own reason. Not every woman is meant to be a mom. Look at how Raven treated RJ. Yes, Swoop loves her son, but her alter ego should not raise kids. My mom never should have been one. I can deal with that.”
“Wow, that’s so enlightened of you.”
“Well, I’ve been hanging around a lot of women lately,” he teases.
“Swear to me that you’re okay with the mom thing.”
“Pry, I am okay with the mom thing. In fact, she doesn’t know this, but I’m going to pay her a surprise visit. That way I can maybe spend the weekend at her place, and we can really get to know each other. I mean, I know she wasn’t great with kids, but hey, I’m a man now.”
“Um…okay. I hear you. But let’s wait until after I look into her more.”
“There’s nothing to look into, Pry. Like you, my mom is back!”
“I’m happy for you.”
“Pry, we tell each other everything, right?”
“Yeah, of course.”
“Okay, I’m going to tell you something I’ve been up to. And I need you not to get all ‘First Noru’ about it.”
Well, this can’t be good…
“What is it, Randy?”
“I’ve been meeting up with someone these past few days.”
“Wait, are you seeing someone? You have a girlfriend? What’s her name? Do I know her? Where’s she from? Does she have a butterfly tattoo anywhere?” I demand.
“No, it’s not like that. It’s not a girl, and it’s not romantic. I’ve been meeting up with…a friend.”
“Who?”
“Jason.”
Chapter Twenty:
All For nothing
The First Guardian is livid as he glares across the table. It’s been half an hour since I told him that Randy has been in contact with Malakaro. It’s taken that long for my father to calm down. We’re at the kitchen table of the newly formed Guardian home; my mom and I wait until he’s calm enough to blink.
“Marcus, she’s telling us this for a reason. Stay calm, and we can find out why she’s telling us about Randy and how she wants us to help,” Mom reasons.
“It’s simple. We place Randy in a Holder,” he says firmly.
“Dad, we can’t imprison my best friend.”
“Well, something has to be done. Pry, we can’t let Randy get pulled into Malakaro’s web of evil,” Dad says.
“I know that,” I reply.
“Do you? Do you really know what he’s capable of?”
“I know better than anyone. I have been here, front and center, as he rips my world apart. I know better than anyone what Malakaro can do.”
“Good, then you place Randy in a Holder until this mess is over,” he orders.
“I won’t do that.”
“Why not?”
“Because that’s not going to work with Randy. His mom walking out on him really messed with his head. He has a soft spot for kids who were abandoned,” I inform him.
“Jason wasn’t abandoned. I saw to his every need. I know it’s not enough and that you need to hang around and be there for your kid, but he left me no choice. He was evil the day he was born, and if there was anything I could have done to get him to be good…”
My mom gets up from my side of the table and goes over to the First Guardian. She places a hand on his shoulder, and he lowers his head in a mix of frustration and sadness.
“Marcus, I was there, I saw how hard it was for you not to bring Jason home. I know how much it hurt you, honey, I do. But what matters now isn’t what actually happened but what Malakaro is saying happened.”
“Exactly. Dad, Randy thinks that you’re the reason this is happening. He thinks that had you done your job as a father, we would never be in this position. He believes in his heart of hearts that Malakaro is a monster of your making,” I add.
“And what about you, what do you think?” he asks.
“I don’t know. I wasn’t there when you met up with him back when he was Jason. I don’t know what that felt like. But I know Malakaro now, and the fact that Randy is sympathetic to the being that killed the girl he loves scares me.”
“If you don’t want to confine him, what do you want to do?” Mom asks.
“Randy says he met up with Malakaro three times. And that they just talked. This isn’t all bad. The fact is he came clean and told me about the meetings. That means there’s still hope. Now I could place him in the Holder, but if I do that, then I have his body, but his heart and mind belong to Malakaro. And I will not allow that.”
“What do you need from us?” he asks.
“I need Randy to hear your side of the story. I need him to know what really happened. That way he gets the whole picture,” I suggest. My dad doesn’t reply. He just grips his bottle of Coy tightly and glares off into space. I can feel the anger beaming off him. When it becomes clear that he’s not going to reply, I look over at my mom desperately.
“Carrot, I need to talk to your father—alone.”
I nod in agreement and walk out of the kitchen. There is no way I am missing out on what they’re saying. I just can’t. I need to know if Dad is willing to talk to Randy. I really feel like he is the only person that can get through to him. So I discreetly peek through the kitchen door.
My mom goes over to my dad, places her hand under his chin, and tilts his head up so that their eyes meet.
“Hey, you in there?” she asks.
“Yeah, I’m here,” he says distantly.
“You need to stop and explain your reasons for not taking Jason into our family,” she says gently.
“I don’t know how to explain it to Randy.”
“I’m not talking about Randy. The one you need to explain to is you.”
“What does that even mean, Emmy?”
“Sweetheart, no one is harder on you than you are. You need to remind yourself that you did all you could because, Marcus, you truly did. I want you to tell me why you walked away from your son.”
“You know why.”
“I need you to say it out loud. Right here and now. Why did you walk away from Jason, your firstborn son?”
“Because of the dogs.”
“Exactly, because of the dogs. You have to remember that. You did what was right for your family. You left Jason because of the dogs and because you wanted your family to be safe.”
“Yeah, I did, and all of that was for nothing!” he snaps.
“No, Marcus, you did it for your family.”
“I walked out on Jason because I wanted to keep my family safe. But that didn’t work. Sam is gone.”
“I know, but we still have our little girl.”
“No, we don’t! Emmy, Pryor grew up without us; we missed it. We missed it all! You should have been there to console her when she got her heart broken. You were supposed to be holding her hand when she wanted advice about what her first time was going to be like. I should have been there to help her through the first time she had to choose between her heart and her duty. Damn it, I was supposed to be there to help her through losing a team member. We’re her parents; we were supposed to be there, but we weren’t.
“The only way I could live with myself after walking out on my own flesh and blood was knowing that I did it to save my other children. But it was all for nothing. I didn’t save them, Em. I didn’t…” His voice is filled with pain and shakes when it hits the air. My mom places her hands on either side of his face and looks deeply into his eyes.
“Marcus, Pry is not done growing up. She still needs us. She still needs you. I still need you. I know it hurts, honey, I do. I had them rebuild this house, but I can’t get myself to walk into the room my baby died in. Every time I think about it…” Tears begin to flood into my mom’s eyes, causing lightning to start ripping the sky apart. My mom clears her throat and blinks back the tears, tears I didn’t know she could produce.
“Emmy, how can I get through to Randy when I can hardly get through to Pry? I think some part of her blames me,” Dad says.
“She doesn’t know about the dogs. You never told anyone. But you will tell her when you are ready. Marcus, she will understand.”
“I go back to that day in my head every night; was there something I could have said or done? How could I have fixed Jason? How could I make him…I know it makes me an awful angel and the worst father that ever lived, but I left Jason because I had to. Emmy, I had to.” He moans as she pulls him in and embraces him.
“How do we do this? How do we get through this?” he begs her.
“The same way we got through everything else, Guardian—together.”
I want to know what happened with the dogs and Malakaro, but I don’t dare burst into the kitchen and ask. In fact, I walk away and head back to my room, knowing the two of them really need to be alone. I’ve never seen my dad so torn up about anything in my life before. Watching the two of them struggle is hard. I want to make it better, but if the First Guardian and Death can’t fix this, there is very little I can do.
When I update the team by phone, they ask if I want them to come over, but I decline. Swoop and East need to stay with Aunt Miku and Uncle Jay. They may not get any more family time for a while. Swoop took RJ from the humans for the weekend so that he could meet his grandparents. East is finding out more about his dad, and judging from his voice, he loves every minute of it.
Aaden took Diana to a specialist so that they can make sure Boom is okay. He asked if I needed him to stop by and help deal with Randy. I said no because I don’t want Randy to feel outnumbered. When I’m done checking on them, I call Bex’s room. The Healers tell me he is healed all the way but that he’s Recharging and not to wake him. I thank them for taking such good care of him.
I then place a call to Bellamy, who is now in charge of making sure all the fires have really been put out as far as the New Order is concerned. Since the Guardians have returned, the Paras not only seem to back off, but most of them are friendly again. Aaden thinks it’s out of fear, but I think it’s also a matter of trust. The Paras trust that the Guardians won’t let us run wild and crazy.
I plop down on my bed and close my eyes. It’s been an emotional day, even for a Noru. I think back to how I felt when Randy told me about his meeting with Malakaro. I have never wanted to throttle someone the way I wanted to throttle Randy. It took all of me not to fly to his house and shake the hell out of him.
The one thing that made me calm down was hearing the hope in his voice. He really believes that Malakaro may be worth redeeming. Randy believes that because he has a good heart and he hates to see others in pain.
That’s what I love about Randy—his compassion. Why else would he forgive his mom so quickly after years of being angry with her? That boy has a good heart. But still, I don’t want him dying for it. So I place a tracker on him so I can monitor his whereabouts from the screen on my watch.
My cell vibrates and jars me out of my thoughts. I look at the screen and see a message from Bex telling me he’s on his way.
Okay, Pry. You can do this (although I’m not really sure what it is I’m supposed to do).
I head outside and spot him coming towards me. The closer he gets to my doorstep, the more anxiety I feel. His stride is confident and certain. His eyes sparkle with anticipation as he sees me. His perfect smile is inviting and makes me feel even worse than I already do. He picks me up in a big bear hug, lifting me off the ground. When he puts me down, he kisses me fervently.
“I called the clinic and they said—”
“That I was recharging. I told them to say that. I wanted to surprise you,” he replies.
“Well, it worked,” I reply with a smile.
“What’s wrong?” he asks.
“For one thing, Randy and Malakaro are like BFFs now.”
“That’s a joke, right?” he asks.
I look at him and raise my eyebrow. He mouths the word wow and asks if he can help.
“I’m hoping my dad can help, but thanks,” I reply.
“I’m here to help in any way you need me. You know that, don’t you?”
“Yes, that’s what makes me a lucky girl,” I reply as he leans in and kisses me tenderly.
“I don’t know how I could stay away from them for so long,” he says as he pulls away and studies my face.
“Stay away from what?” I ask.
“Your lips. Pry, you have no idea how far I would go for those lips.”
“You can have them for a small fee,” I tease.
“Pry, I missed you so much.”
“I missed you too. I’m so glad you’re okay. We almost didn’t get to you in time,” I reply.
“I never lost faith in you. I knew you’d figure out a way to get to me. Thank you.”
“You would have come to find me. That’s what we do for each other.”
“I have an idea I want to run by you.”
“About the mission?” I ask.
“No, about us.”
Crap. “What is it?” I say out loud.
“I think we should go away—before you say no, think about it. Your parents are back, and while they can’t take over everything, at least they can keep a lookout while we’re away. I’m not talking about weeks, although that would work too,” he says with a sly smile.
“Bex—”
“I know, I know, it’s a bad time to go away, but we should do it anyway. Just for the weekend. Pry, we’ve been through so much, we deserve this. And it’s my chance to make it up to you.”
“Make what up to me?”
“Even though you had a million things going on, you took time out to make sure I was okay by taking me to the mountains. It made all the difference in the world. I want to do that for you. I know I haven’t been the best boyfriend.”
“Bex, you’ve been great.”
“I’ve been a workaholic. I’ve left you alone for long stretches of time. There are times you’ve called and I haven’t picked up.”
“You were running a kingdom.”
“Th
at’s beside the point. You matter to me. I love you. And what do I do? I hide a big secret from you. Yes, Diana needed to share this news with her team on her own terms, but I should have told you. So I want to say I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, Bex, really.”
“No, it’s not; that’s where our weekend getaway comes in. Let me take you away. We already went somewhere cold, how about a tropical island? We own one off the coast of New Zealand. The water is so blue it matches the sky. The weather is perfect. In fact, the only problem with the Island of Samoa is that the nights can get a little chilly. But I think you and I can find a way to stay warm,” he says suggestively as he pulls me close and nibbles on my ear.
“That sounds great, it really does. But first, can we take a walk?”
We walk down the New York City streets in silence. The air is crisp and the sun is about to set, leaving the sky with a fading orange glow. A few humans walk past us, but other than that, New York City empties the streets for us.
“Pry, you haven’t said anything in like ten minutes. Is everything okay?” he asks.
“No, it’s not. I just don’t know where to start. I don’t know how to…”
“Just say it. No matter what it is, we’ll get past it. Pry, what is it?”
I fold my arms across my chest and brace myself. He’s right; there is no other way to say it but to actually say it.
“Bex, I slept with Aaden.”
Bex stops walking and gasps as if I’ve just ripped his soul out from his body. He then quickly composes himself. But while he looks calm, there are small physical indications that tell me he’s incensed. His jaw is tight, his wings are flapping wildly against the wind, and he glares at me with such intensity it feels as if his eyes will sear a hole right through me.
“I’m so sorry. Diana implied that you two slept together on the roof. I was so hurt and so angry. Look, I know it’s not an excuse, but that’s what happened. And I never wanted to hurt you. Please believe me.”
“How long?” he asks.
“What?”
“How long did it take you to go from ‘I love Bex’ to revenge sex with your ex?” he demands.
