by Ava Grace
When he leaned down and kissed her on the cheek, I balled my hands into fists and walked faster, using every ounce of willpower to refrain from going over there to take my frustration out on him in place of his waste-of-space brother. Instead, I beat feet as quickly as possible to get back to my hog so that I could get the hell out of there.
Despite needing to vent, I couldn’t take my anger out on Jackson. He didn’t deserve it. He looked at Faith with so much adoration that I just had to cut him some slack. She deserved someone who looked at her like that. She deserved the world. I just wished I could have been the one to give it to her.
Chapter Seven
Faith
Every couple of weeks the girls and I alternated where we ate dinner. Creede was such a small town that we didn’t have a lot of places to eat, so dinner was either at The Shack or at Bucks’ Steakhouse. I would have preferred to stay far away from Coop after our uncomfortable exchange at the barbecue, but that night, unfortunately, it was our night to eat at The Shack.
If the girls knew what had happened between Coop and me, I was sure they would have boycotted his restaurant in a show of support, but I hadn’t said anything to them—either about what had happened between us three years ago or about my fears of Owen telling Jackson about my conversation with Coop at the barbecue.
I wasn’t sure exactly why I hadn’t confided in them about Coop. At the time, it had just felt too personal to discuss. It was something that I’d wanted to keep to myself—possibly because I felt stupid and ashamed for letting him seduce me in the first place but also for hoping that I’d meant more to him than all the others. Telling them about Owen at the barbecue would have involved them knowing the whole story so I’d kept that to myself, too.
We were in full-on celebration mode at The Shack because Libby had just launched a new website which advertised and sold the soft furnishing design projects that she’d painstakingly made by hand. Her throw pillows and quilts were to die for and Violet, Andrea and I were so incredibly proud of what she’d accomplished since she moved to Creede a few months earlier.
Libby had had a difficult start in life and she’d been through hell and back since, but now everything had fallen into place for her. She had a great boyfriend and a job she loved and every time I saw her she had a huge smile on her face. It was endearing. The fact that her life had done a complete one-eighty in such a short space of time, gave me hope that my life could change for the better too.
Coop was sat at his usual table when we arrived and though I tried not to look his way at all, my gaze inevitably strayed in his direction and each time it did, I caught him staring back at me, his expression intense.
“So, tell us all about it!” Andrea prompted after our drinks had arrived.
I took a sip from my beer bottle and pretended to scan the contents on the menu, but Andrea snatched it out of my hands and slammed it shut.
“Hey!” I protested feebly.
“Spill,” she demanded. “We want to know everything. How is it going with Jackson?”
“Have you kissed him yet?” Libby asked.
Violet waved off the question with a swish of her hand. “What we really want to know is if you’ve done the deed yet.”
Andrea giggled. “Yeah, have you banged him?”
I rolled my eyes at that. I’d known the questions were coming of course, but I was no less prepared to answer them.
I let out a long sigh.
“Yes,” I said to Libby, answering her question first.
I turned to Violet. “No, I haven’t slept with him.” I glanced at Andrea. “We only just started dating. Jeez. Give me a chance.”
“Oh please, it’s been weeks,” Violet said. “What are you, a nun?”
“Yeah, what are you waiting for?” Andrea asked. “A gold-plated invitation. Screw him already.”
Libby chuckled then took a sip of water.
“How come you’re not drinking tonight?” I asked in an effort to change the subject.
Libby shrugged. “After what happened to Arlene, Coop was a waitress down so I agreed to help him out by covering a few of her shifts—at least until he can find someone to replace her on a permanent basis. I’m on the afternoon shift tomorrow so I have to be here at twelve, but I need to get up early so that I can finish a quilt I’ve been working on for my website. I don’t want to do all that with a hangover.”
“So, Coop’s not going to take Arlene back?” Andrea asked. “When she’s out of the hospital, I mean?”
Although my avoidance tactics had worked, I hadn’t counted on the fact that our topic of conversation would shift to Coop. Typical.
Libby shook her head. “I don’t think so. He already gave her another shot after he fired her the last time, but she couldn’t leave the drugs alone so I think he’s really done with her now. Mind you, it’s Coop we’re talking about so there’s every chance that he’ll change his mind again.”
“Why do you say that?” I asked.
Libby pursed her lips. “Because he might look like a big bad biker dude, but Coop’s really a big softie.”
I snorted. “Yeah right.”
The idea of Coop being a big softie as Libby had put it seemed ludicrous to me. He was big and tough and raw and sexy, what he most certainly wasn’t, was a big softie.
Libby scowled at me. “He is. He might not show that side of himself to everyone, but Coop has got a heart of gold. Trust me, it’s there.”
“Speaking of Coop,” Andrea said. “He’s been spending a lot of time with Ethan recently. Do you think there’s something’s going on?”
Everyone but me glanced over to Coop’s table where he and the sheriff were seated together. They’d been deep in conversation since we’d arrived.
“Don’t know,” Violet said. “But what I’m interested in is the fact that Coop hasn’t been able to take his eyes off Faith since we got here.”
I snapped my head in her direction. “What?”
“It’s true,” she said. “He’s been looking over here constantly, trying to get your attention.”
“He has not,” I denied.
She shot me the look. “Has too.”
“You know, I realize you’re dating Jackson,” Libby mused. “But I don’t know, you don’t seem to be all that into him. Why don’t you consider going out on a date with Coop? He’s a really great guy and he…”
“Absolutely not,” I said cutting her off mid-sentence. “I’d never go near Coop again.”
I snapped my mouth shut when I realized what I’d said, but it was too late.
The damage had been done.
Three sets of wide, unblinking eyes stared back at me.
“What the hell?” Violet asked.
“Say that again,” Andrea demanded.
“What do you mean, you’d never go near him again?” Libby asked.
Violet’s expression changed from one of surprise to one of hurt. “You and Coop?” she said. “Why didn’t you tell us, Faith? I thought we were your friends.”
“You are!” I said, wishing I’d kept my big mouth shut. “Of course you are. I don’t know why I didn’t say anything before. I guess because it was something that I’d rather forget.”
“When was it?”Andrea asked.
“Three years ago, give or take. Right after Caroline was killed.” I lowered my gaze then said. “He was my first.”
A chorus of gasps sounded.
“Did he hurt you?” Libby glanced over her shoulder with a scowl.
I shook my head. “No, he didn’t hurt me.”
Much.
Coop might not have physically hurt me, but he hadn’t called me after we’d slept together—after I’d given him my virginity. For three years, he’d all but pretended I didn’t exist. And as much as it pained me to admit it. That had hurt.
“Oh, Faith,” Violet said, looking at me with something resembling pity.
“You cared for him, didn’t you?”
I took another sip from my
bottle before straightening my shoulders and meeting her gaze.
“You know what? It doesn’t matter. It happened a long time ago. I just want to forget about it and move on with my life.”
“Yeah. Coop who?” Violet said, raising her glass in a toast.
Andrea nodded. “Exactly. You’re better off without him.” She raised her glass to me too. “And now you have sweet and thoughtful Jackson to take your mind off him. So, here’s to you and Jackson.”
I lifted my bottle and clinked it against theirs. “To us.”
“Couldn’t you and Coop give it another go?” Libby asked quietly. “I mean, he’s obviously into you and if you’re …”
Violet and Andrea glared at her.
“No,” Andrea said. “We’re not giving Coop another chance. He had one and he blew it.”
“You got that right,” Violet said, tossing her long red hair over her shoulder. “Screw him. Though, not literally,” she added sheepishly.
“Definitely not,” Andrea agreed. “Coop’s now on our shit list.”
“We have a shit list?” Libby asked.
I couldn’t help it.
I burst out laughing.
“You guys are crazy,” I said. “But I love you all. Thank you for making me smile about this.”
Violet put her arm around my shoulder then pulled me in for a hug. “You’re welcome and we love you too—even though you failed to tell us that you lost your virginity to Cooper Brown and fell for him hook, line and sinker.”
I started to deny that I’d fallen for Coop, but it would have been an out and out lie so I put my mouth to use instead by taking another sip from my bottle then forcing myself to swallow the icy cold beer around the sudden lump in my throat.
Our meals were delivered to our table shortly afterward so we all got busy eating. The food was always good in The Shack. I’d tried just about everything on the menu and I loved it all. After we’d finished, we all toasted Libby and her new business venture and wished her well.
Violet and Andrea decided to sit at the bar and have another drink before they called it a night and Mason was on his way down from the mountain to pick up Libby. I couldn’t stay for a nightcap myself because I’d promised my mom I’d go over there after dinner to help her get ready for bed.
My mom could do most things on her own, but she needed help with the little things like getting her socks on and off and squeezing toothpaste onto her toothbrush. The stroke had paralyzed her down one side, but through her ongoing physiotherapy, she was regaining a lot of the movement in her limbs.
It hadn’t helped that she was so overweight.
My mom had never been a petite woman, but after my father had passed away, she indulged in a lot of what some people might call comfort eating. For the first three months after the stroke, she’d been wheelchair-bound and of course, with no exercise, she put on even more weight. Thankfully, she was starting to lose it again now. Her road to recovery had been slow, but the doctors said she was making steady progress and, after everything she’d been through, I was proud of her for being so strong.
We split the check when it came then after I’d paid, I said goodbye to the girls and headed for the door. As usual, I tried to look straight ahead of myself and not let my gaze wander to Coop, but even without seeing him directly, I always seemed to know exactly where he was. I tracked him out of the corner of my eye as he got up out of his seat and headed my way.
Crap.
I sped up my pace.
I did not want another showdown with him, especially not there in the bar, in front of so many people, including my friends who I had no doubt would come to back me up and fight in my corner.
But Coop didn’t stop me on my way to the door.
Instead, he followed me out into the parking lot where I was dismayed to discover that we were alone.
Double crap.
I didn’t trust myself to be alone with Cooper Brown, any more than I trusted him not to try something on with me. I straightened my spine, pulled my shoulders back and braced myself physically and mentally before spinning around to face him. I forced myself not to get lost in those rich brown eyes of his and hardened my jaw.
“What do you want, Coop?”
His expression was a mask of stone. “I want you to stay away from the Leigh Lodge.”
I glared at him. “Are you shitting me? You’re honestly asking me to stay away from Jackson?”
A muscle in his jaw ticked. “No, I’m asking you to stay away from his house. His brother Owen is bad news and I don’t want you around him. The fact that staying away from Owen might also keep you away from Jackson is just a stroke of unexpected luck.”
His face split into a wide grin that sent my pulse racing.
I ignored the effect he had on me and folded my arms. Drawing my brows together, I tried to remember that I was angry at him.
“For your information, I hate Owen. I wouldn’t spend any more time in his company than I absolutely had to, but I don’t see why that’s any business of yours.”
Coop cocked his head to one side, but the rest of his body became as still as a statue. “Why do you hate him? Has he done something to you?”
I sensed that the answers to the questions were important. Coop looked as if he was barely controlling a dangerous fury that simmered beneath the surface and I didn’t want to be the one to unleash it so I chose my words carefully.
“Other than be his usual asshole self, you mean? No, he hasn’t done anything. What’s all this about, Coop?”
He heaved a sigh and scrubbed a hand over his neatly trimmed beard. “He’s involved in something, something dangerous and illegal. There are other people involved too. Bad people—people you’d do best to stay the hell away from.”
“From his MC club?”
Coop inclined his head. “Possibly.”
“Possibly?”
He frowned. “It’s highly likely, yes.”
I couldn’t resist asking him a question that I’d been curious about for years.
“Is that why you left the club because of what the people in it were doing?”
“Yes.”
I nodded in understanding.
Coop took a step closer to me and my breath hitched. His eyes smoldered with fire and my heart began to thud.
“Will you stay away from the lodge?”
“I’m sorry, Coop. I can’t do that.”
He bit out a curse and I had this crazy notion of not wanting to disappoint him.
“I’ll stay away from Owen as much as I can, but the lodge is Jackson’s home too. And as we’re dating…”
I left the sentence hanging in the air.
I was sure I didn’t need to explain myself further. If I continued to see Jackson, at some point in time, we were going to sleep together which meant he’d be spending time at my place, and vice versa.
If I’d thought previously that there had been a dangerous fury inside Coop that was barely contained, now it was all but bursting at the seams. His whole demeanor grew in severity and he stood there staring at me, tall and angry.
He took another step forward which put him in my personal space. “Faith.”
I shook my head and took a step back, increasing the distance between us again so that I could think clearly.
“I’ve got to go and take care of my mom,” I said in an effort to make him back off. “I’m sorry, Coop. Staying away from Owen is the best I can do. I’ll see you around.”
I turned on my heel and headed towards my car at a jog. It was only when I was safely inside with the engine running that it occurred to me that lately, I always seemed to be running away from him.
Chapter Eight
Coop
I stood in the parking lot with my hands stuffed into the pockets of my jeans until long after the taillights of Faith’s car had disappeared out of sight. I tried to determine at what moment, exactly, I’d let her get under my skin, but I realized that she’d been there for so long, I couldn’
t remember a time when she hadn’t.
There was a reason why I’d picked Faith to sleep with that night nearly three years ago after I’d sworn to myself that I’d stay away from the women who lived in town. I’d been horny, sure, and maybe if there had been a pretty tourist around who’d captured my attention, I might not have gone after Faith that night. But the truth was, I’d seduced her because I’d been attracted to her for years and I’d finally decided to act on it.
Going after Faith seemed as inevitable as the change of seasons. If it hadn’t have been that night, it would have been some other night. Now that I came to think about it, she was likely the reason I’d made the no town women pledge to myself in the first place. I think deep down I always knew that I’d go after Faith and I wasn’t ready to start anything with her.
In the months leading up to the night I’d spent with Faith, I’d been so hung up on Caroline that it wouldn’t have crossed my mind to touch another woman, and if she hadn’t died when she did, I likely wouldn’t have.
However, there was something about Faith that had always fascinated me. Sleeping with her had only deepened that fascination and even now, three years later, that something was still there, chipping away at my resolve, despite the fact that she kept running away from me.
It only made me want her all the more.
Half of the time Faith seemed indifferent to my presence, and the rest of the time she was practically hostile. I wasn’t sure why, exactly, but that hostility got me hard enough to pound nails. I wasn’t even put off by the fact that she was currently dating someone else—though admittedly that last fact made me want to slam my fist into a wall. Repeatedly.
But did I want to get into another relationship?
The only other relationship I’d been in had nearly destroyed me.
But the simple fact of the matter was that Faith wasn’t Caroline. They were as different from each other as night was to day and not just in the way that they looked. Their personalities were poles apart, too. Caroline had liked to play games and she’d been an expert at it. She knew just what to say to get people to do what she wanted. She’d played on the fact that she’d had to go without a lot of the time when growing up and used it to get her own way.
