by Nash, Jean
They were seated on wicker chairs in the fragrant garden, having aperitifs before dinner. The sun was setting in an amber-colored sky, turning marigolds and buttercups into blossoms of bronze. Susanna watched the two men in quiet contentment. How alike they were in many ways, and yet how dynamically different was the one to whom she’d given her heart.
Teddy sloughed off Jay’s compliment with a wave of his hand. “That’s what you pay me for, Jay. Any one of your people would have achieved the same results.”
“You’re too modest,” Jay said and tasted his sherry. “The Sea Star was on its last legs—“ He glanced at his betrothed. “Forgive me, Susanna, but it’s true. And you, Teddy, helped Susanna to bring it back from the very edge of the grave. Your efforts won’t go unrewarded.”
“A job well done is reward in itself,” Teddy said with just the right amount of deferential self-effacement.
“That may be true of missionary work,” Jay said dryly, “but it rarely suffices in this business. No, Teddy, you’re going to get more than a pat on the back for what you’ve done. I’ve decided to install you as manager of one of my major hotels.”
Susanna was gratified. Now Jay would transfer him to Baltimore, which was what Teddy wanted and deserved.
But to her astonishment, Jay said, “I’m sending you to Boston to manage the Fenway.”
“Boston?” Teddy’s shock couldn’t have been plainer.
“What’s wrong?” Jay said. “I thought you’d be pleased.”
“I.... Of course I’m pleased. The Fenway’s a beauty. I just thought....”
“Yes?” Jay prompted.
“Well, for one thing, what about Tony Adams? Won’t he object to your replacing him as manager?”
“I’m sending Tony to Baltimore to manage the Majestic. You may have heard there’s a vacancy there.”
Teddy nervously looked at Susanna, who hastened to say, “It’s all right, Teddy. Jay knows I told you about Alan Devlin.”
Teddy relaxed visibly. But then he set down his sherry glass with a thump and rose to his feet. “I’m glad it’s out in the open.” His voice rang with resentment. “You might have told me, Jay. I’m not exactly an outsider, you know.”
Jay looked at him, unperturbed, and crossed his legs. “My apologies, Teddy. At first, I had so much on my mind that it simply didn’t occur to me to tell you. Then, when I thought about telling you, I remembered that you and Alan were such good friends. It seemed senseless to upset you by telling you he had betrayed me.”
If Susanna were not so concerned with Teddy’s feelings, she might have noticed the tension in Jay’s cat-quiet voice. As it was, she said in an effort to be helpful, “Jay, Teddy wanted to manage the Majestic. Don’t you remember my telling you that?”
“Yes, I do, Susanna.” His eyes remained on Teddy. “But I think he’ll be more useful to me at the Fenway.”
“Useful?” Teddy echoed, anger and disappointment overruling discretion. “The Fenway practically runs itself. I’d be bored to tears there. Jay, why are you doing this?”
“I thought I was doing you a service, Teddy. You’ve worked hard here at the Sea Star. You deserve a rest. The Fenway is the perfect place for you to take life easy for a while.”
Teddy, unlike Susanna, became aware of the undercurrent in Jay’s tone. Seeking to lighten a situation he didn’t fully understand, he bantered, “If I wanted to take life easy, Jay, I’d have taken a job with anyone but you.”
His jest drew no smile from his watchful employer. Instead, Jay said soberly, “Are you suggesting that if I send you to Boston, you’ll look elsewhere for employment?”
“God, no!” Teddy said at once. “What do you take me for? I owe you a lot, Jay. Don’t think I’ll ever forget that. There’s no question in my mind where my loyalty lies.”
“Nor in mine,” Jay said. “Then you’ll manage the Fenway?”
For a moment, Teddy said nothing, then he nodded, resigned. Susanna could feel his disappointment as keenly as if it were her own. She regarded him compassionately, her thoughts an open book, unaware that Jay was watching her with a look that was frightening in its intensity.
Later, after dinner, Susanna and Jay strolled, as they often did, to Absecon Inlet, that untamed primitive landscape where she first suspected she loved him. To Susanna, no place on Earth was lovelier or more romantic. An argent moon spilled silvery light on sea and sand. Gentle waves lapped rhythmically on shore. While gulls and sandpipers slept, a great horned owl serenaded the couple with a melancholy hoot. Susanna caught sight of the bird roosting on a rock, his enormous yellow eyes scanning the area for his dinner.
“How lonely he looks,” she said to Jay.
They were seated in their favorite resting spot, a curved mass of driftwood that was as secluded as a cove. Jay’s arm was around her shoulder, her head was on his chest. “You think he looks lonely, Susanna? I think he looks dangerous.”
“Dangerous?” she said with a laugh. “That old faker? I’ll bet he’s as tame as a canary.”
Jay’s gaze was on the bird, but his thoughts seemed to be elsewhere. Since leaving the Sea Star’s restaurant he had been tense and preoccupied. Susanna suspected he was thinking about Teddy.
“How curious,” he said quietly.
“What is?”
“The different ways that people perceive the world around them.”
“How do you mean, Jay?”
“You think he’s lonely. I think he’s dangerous.”
“The owl?” she said, sensing he meant another.
He gave her a puzzled look. “Yes, the owl. Isn’t that what we’re both talking about?”
“Yes,” she said. “It’s just that you seemed to be talking about more than the owl.”
“That proves my point, Susanna,” he said with a smile. “I was talking solely about the owl. You read something else into my words.”
Susanna straightened up and faced him directly. “That’s not true, Jay, and you know it. Let’s stop fencing with each other, shall we? You were talking about Teddy. And while I don’t want to interfere in matters that don’t concern me—”
“Teddy?” he said in genuine surprise. “I wasn’t talking about him. Why do you—?”
“Jay, for heaven’s sake!” she burst out. “What’s happened between you and Teddy? On Easter Sunday, you acted so strangely about him. You’ve treated him well for the past few weeks, but tonight— Well, I just wish you’d tell me what’s wrong instead of filling my head with all sorts of preposterous notions.”
“Susanna, what the devil are you talking about? I tell you, I wasn’t talking about Teddy. And what preposterous notions do you mean?”
She paused, then said reluctantly, “It occurred to me that you might be jealous of him.”
“Jealous of Teddy?” His voice went suddenly quiet, that same cat-quiet voice, which earlier had escaped her notice but which now raised the hairs on her arms. “Do I have reason to be?”
“Certainly not!” she said, indignant. “But by the way you’re behaving—”
“If my behavior distresses you, I apologize. But it suddenly occurs to me, Susanna, that you’re inordinately protective of Teddy.”
“Protective of him? Because I want to know why you act so oddly whenever I mention him? No, Jay. That’s curiosity, not protectiveness. What’s Teddy done to turn you against him?”
Jay stood up, slipped his hands into his trouser pockets and looked out to sea. His posture was relaxed, but there was an ominous rigidity to the strong line of his jaw.
Susanna rose, too. “Jay, please tell me what’s wrong.” She was concerned for him now. “I know Teddy has displeased you in some way. And if it’s not jealousy—”
He turned to her so suddenly that she stepped backward in alarm. “Maybe it is jealousy,” he said roughly. “Maybe I don’t like the way you always take his side, or the way you look at him sometimes.”
“Don’t be silly,” she said sensibly. “It’s you I love, Ja
y. Teddy is a special friend, that’s all. He’s been so good for the Sea Star. I can’t tell you how grateful I am to him.”
“You’ve told me that ad nauseam, Susanna. Your letters were filled with praise of him. It’s difficult for me to believe that his professional expertise is what’s made him such a god in your eyes.”
“That’s absurd,” she said, but a dart of unease tightened her nerves. “If you’re suggesting that I consider Teddy other than a business associate, you couldn’t be more mistaken. He’s simply a sympathetic and—”
“You needn’t reiterate his virtues,” Jay stopped her. “It begins to grow tiresome.”
She stared at him, bewildered. This was totally unlike him. She knew he had much on his mind, and that the Excelsior was consuming all his energies. But Jay was such a sensible man. Surely he must know that she loved no one but him.
“Jay, listen to me,” she said reasonably. “You’re tired and overwrought. You’re making a mountain out of a molehill. Perhaps I do go on too much about Teddy. But you must understand—”
“Be still!” he commanded. “You’re not dealing with one of your feebleminded local yokels here. I understand more than you think I do.”
Jay’s face was hard, suffused with a fury Susanna had seen only once before, on the night he told her of the man who had betrayed him.
“Jay, stop it,” she said. “This is all a lot of nonsense. Teddy is only—”
“Goddamn you!” he said fiercely, and seized her by the arms. “Stop talking about him. I’m sick to death of hearing his name on your lips.”
She was frightened now. His hands were bruising her arms. His eyes, dark and dangerous, sent a tremor of fear through her.
He shook her once, hard, driven it seemed by some deep-seated demon. “Do you know what you’ve done to me, you little sea-witch?” he grated. “You’ve turned my world upside-down. Until you came along, my life was my own, no distractions, no intrusions. Then you lured me to your island, bewitching me with your sad song, playing the innocent virgin. And the minute my back is turned—”
“Jay, for the love of heaven, what are you saying?”
“The minute my back is turned,” he raged on, “you start practicing your sexual wiles on someone else. Do you think I’m blind? I know how you feel about him. Every word out of your mouth is in praise of him. You smile at him as if he’s the axis around which your entire world revolves.”
“That’s not true!” she cried, outrage and insult superseding her fear. “How dare you suggest such a thing? Get out of my sight. I never want to see you again!”
She twisted out of his grasp. When he reached out to seize her again, she drew back her hand and struck him hard across the face.
Neither of them moved. Susanna was instantly sorry she’d resorted to violence. She never once stopped to think that Jay was the one who had initiated the violence. Her throat ached. Her mouth began to tremble.
He stared at her in silence. She thought he was going to turn away, walk out of her life, and never return. But with a suddenness that immobilized her, he reached out for her roughly, pulled her hard into his arms, and his mouth came down on hers with a passion that swept the breath from her lungs.
Her arms went around his neck, and her mouth submitted to the onslaught of his. She forgot that he had frightened and insulted her. All logic deserted her. She knew only emotion. She knew only that she loved him—more than life, more than honor—and that without him, life and honor had no meaning at all.
He pressed her closer, his kisses grew fiercer. Susanna felt dizzy and faint, helplessly spinning in an inescapable eddy of longing and love. Jay sank to his knees, pulling her down alongside him. He eased her down on the blanket, then covered her body with his. “I want you,” he breathed. “I want you now, I want all of you. I’ll never let you go.”
A thrill of desire shot through her. She wanted him, too. She loved him so much. She could feel the heat of his passion, no less violent than hers. His hands caressed her face, her throat, her quivering breast. Breathless with wanting him, she drew his head down to hers and pressed feverish kisses to his sensuous mouth. He fumbled at her clothing. With a trembling hand, she aided him. After a moment, she felt his flesh on hers, burning her, scorching her, exciting her, thrilling her.
She caught her breath sharply as he entered her, hurting her, but pain became a memory when the ecstasy rushed in. For a time he didn’t move. She could feel him inside her, she could feel his racing heart keeping tempo with hers. As inexperienced as she was, she knew that he was fearful of hurting her further, but her desire was such that she no longer felt pain, only a swift headlong yearning such as she’d never felt before.
Her arms tightened around him. The muscles of his back were corded with tension. She entwined her legs with his and arched her body closer to receive the full measure of his love. His lips parted hers. She felt him shudder with pleasure, then with one long erotic movement, he slid himself deeply inside her.
A moan escaped her lips as he grasped her hips and drove into her with a passion that equaled hers. She couldn’t have enough of him. She kept kissing him, touching him, moaning his name, aching for more of him. His mouth and hands possessed her. She was completely in his thrall. As he pressed her even closer, her passion crested and broke, sending torrents of rapture through every vibrating fiber of her being.
An hour might have passed, or a day, or an aeon. Jay lay heavily atop her, his lips at her throat, his fingers entangled in the masses of her hair. Susanna’s mind hummed with pleasure. She stroked his quivering back. He belonged to her now, as fully as she belonged to him. No vow of marriage, no earthly sanction, could rival the blessed union that had joined them together on this night.
“I love you,” she whispered, her lips brushing his jaw. “I love you more intensely than I ever thought possible.”
He was still a part of her, he had not withdrawn. He raised his head and kissed her mouth, a deep, slow, penetrating kiss that reawakened the hunger he had so recently sated in her.
“You are a sea-witch,” he said in a low voice. “When we’re apart, I can think of nothing but you. When we’re together, when I touch you, my will is not my own. No one’s ever gotten under my skin the way you have. I don’t know what I’m going to do with you.”
“Just love me,” she said softly, “the way I love you.” She took his face in her hands and looked deep into his eyes. “You do love me, Jay? You haven’t said it in so long.”
His hands covered hers and he kissed first one palm, then the other. “I love you so intensely that sometimes I can’t breathe for the pain of it.”
He moved over on his side, adjusted her clothing, and brought her snugly into his arms. “Susanna....” His tone was sober. “I want you to forgive me for—”
He said no more, but she knew what he meant. “For making love to me, Jay? But I’ve been wanting you to do that for the longest time.”
“So have I,” he said, “but that doesn’t make it right. We shouldn’t have done it. I shouldn’t have forced you.”
She nestled against him. “You didn’t force me, you foolish man. Well, in a way you did.” She gave him a searching look. “Jay, you do know that I love only you, don’t you? That business about Teddy—”
“Forgive me for that, too,” he said sincerely. “I must have been out of my mind to suggest such a thing.”
“Then you were jealous?”
“Yes,” he said frankly. “If you want to know the truth, that’s why I came back to Atlantic City. Every time I read your letters, filled with praise for Teddy, I’d gnash my teeth and wish you were with me so that I could choke the life out of you. When I got to the Sea Star and saw you together, it was even worse. I wanted to murder both of you. I couldn’t think clearly, I couldn’t sleep at night. Every night I’d toss and turn in bed, seeing you smile at each other, knowing that he had shared so much with you that I hadn’t. I even went so far as to—“ He laughed self-consciously. “I b
egan devising ways to do away with the both of you. I asked myself which way would be best. Bullets? A blade? A garrote? I’d fall asleep planning grisly deaths. It was more effective than counting sheep, I promise you.”
His words gave Susanna pause. Such murderous rage was beyond her comprehension. And for a rational man like Jay to be so violently swayed by jealousy was even more difficult for her to assimilate.
“Jay,” she said warily, “I don’t want to start another quarrel, but I think something else is bothering you about Teddy. Can you tell me what it is?”
He raised himself on an elbow and looked moodily out to sea. His eyes, so candid a moment ago, became dark and obscure. Susanna thought he might reveal the truth at last, but he only said distantly, “There’s nothing else, Susanna.”
She knew he was lying. She knew he didn’t trust her, and she couldn’t, for the life of her, think why. She’d just shared her soul with him, she’d given him her all. Was it unreasonable to expect him to confide in her?
Fifteen
On October 1, 1900, the Excelsior Hotel opened its doors with a fanfare that drew well-wishers from virtually every major city in the country. At twelve noon, under a dazzling sun in a cloudless sky, Jay Grainger cut the satin ribbon that spanned the hotel’s threshold. Mayor Stoy shook his hand. Franklin Murphy, the governor of New Jersey, gave a laudatory speech. John Philip Sousa conducted a medley of his marches, which brought foot-stamping cheers from the jubilant crowd.
The Boardwalk seemed too narrow to contain the elegant assemblage. Biddles and Rittenhouses had come from Philadelphia and now waited impatiently to sign their names to the hotel register. In the Boston contingent were Lowells, Lodges and Cabots. Leland Stanford’s imposing widow had traveled from San Francisco in her private railroad car. Astors and Vanderbilts were there, along with the most famous New Yorker of all, Theodore Roosevelt, the Vice President of the United States.
After the ribbon-cutting ceremony, hotel guests filed into the lobby, which was decorated with fragrant autumn flowers. Smilax twined gracefully about the great marble pillars. Two bronze chandeliers cast a sunburst of light on Isfahan carpets. Marble veneering and colorful mosaics on gold backgrounds reflected the Byzantine mode of the architecture.
