by Julie Cannon
She slid unnoticed out the double doors onto the balcony. The lights of the capital city were twinkling in the night sky, like the stars overhead. She looked up and found the moon, the place that was the center of her greatest achievement. It was full and blindingly bright, and she remembered how she’d felt when Commander Hight had stepped onto its surface. Her heart had swelled with national pride and the fact that she was a part of history.
But lately she’d been in a funk, and she couldn’t shake it. Beth said it was a natural letdown from the stress and excitement of the mission over the previous months. Beth had called it a “Okay, now what?” syndrome, which was the perfect way to describe how she felt. She was at loose ends. The mission she’d spent her life working toward was over. Now what was she supposed to do? How did you top that?
“Will you dance with me?”
Kenner’s voice behind her startled Andrea, and she almost spilled her drink. She turned at the same time Kenner stepped into her line of view. “Excuse me?” She’d heard Kenner ask her to dance but needed a few more seconds to pull herself together.
“I asked if you will dance with me.”
Kenner’s direct, unwavering look took Andrea’s breath away.
“I don’t think so,” Andrea replied carefully, shaking her head.
“Then don’t—think about it,” Kenner said at the obvious confusion on her face. She reached out and laid her hand on Andrea’s arm. “I mean it, Andrea. Stop thinking about everything and just go with it.”
Andrea’s arm burned where Kenner touched her. Kenner made it sound so easy. Stop thinking, turn her brain off, and just go with what felt right. And she was certain dancing with Kenner would simply feel right. But it wasn’t the right thing to do. Not here and not now. Actually nowhere and never was more like it. She could get mixed up and lost in Kenner Hutchings.
“Look around, Kenner. In case you’ve forgotten, we’re at the White House at a party with the president of the United States, a dozen dignitaries, and four major television networks. Two women don’t ‘just go with it’ and dance together.”
“Why not? It’s as good a place as any. As a matter of fact it’s probably the best place. You know, ‘land of the free, home of the brave’ kind of place.”
Kenner’s quirky smile tripped her pulse. “Well, then you’re a lot braver than I am, because outing myself in front of this crowd is not what I would consider a good time and an even worse career move.”
“I’m not asking you to out yourself. Just dance with me.” Kenner’s voice was soft.
Andrea looked at Kenner like she’d just lost her mind. “I know you’re smarter than that, Kenner. Two women don’t dance together because they like the song.”
“Why are we doing this, Andrea?”
“What?” Andrea asked, confused over the shift of the conversation. “Why are we doing what?”
“Pretending we don’t want to rip each other’s clothes off and fuck each other until we drop.”
Heat tore through Andrea at Kenner’s words and the image they evoked. Wasn’t that what they’d done in her office? And didn’t she want to do it again? Even if her brain said no, her subconscious said yes as it relived it every night.
“I have to go,” she said hastily, desperately needing to get away from Kenner before she succumbed to her desire for her.
“Going to run away again?”
Andrea’s back stiffened. She’d never run away from anything in her life. “What do you want from me, Kenner? Another fast and furious fuck on a desk?” Andrea looked around. “How about the table over there?” She pointed across the patio for emphasis. “Or over there in the corner? That looks dark enough that no one would see us.”
“Andrea—”
“If that’s what you want, then you’ll have to find it someplace else. One of the servers can’t keep her eyes off you. I’m sure she’d have a go with you. Now if you’ll excuse me,” Andrea said and started to leave. She didn’t get far before Kenner grabbed her arm.
“Do you hate me that much?” Kenner’s expression hardened.
“What?” That was the last thing she’d expected Kenner to say.
Kenner didn’t answer her question. “That you can’t do or say anything nice or decent to me? The competition for smartest woman in the room is over, Andrea. I won because I solved your problem. You won for bringing me in to solve it. It’s a tie, a draw, a stalemate, or whatever you want to call it. But it’s over.” Kenner stepped back a bit and looked at Andrea, comprehension dawning on her face. “Or maybe you just don’t like me.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Andrea said. “I don’t hate you. I never did.”
“Then what is the problem?”
Andrea had no idea where this conversation was going. She didn’t know how it even got started. The pattern of confusion and uncertainty that always centered around Kenner hadn’t stopped just because she’d left NASA grounds. Andrea still had a hard time focusing, her dreams continued to have Kenner as the main character, and a haze of anxiousness seemed to follow her around.
“What do you want from me?” Andrea asked, not certain if she really wanted to know the answer.
“I’ve changed my mind,” Kenner said. “I don’t want to dance with you right now.”
Andrea instinctively knew that whatever Kenner did want was more powerful than a simple dance.
“I want to kiss the most beautiful woman in the most famous house in the world,” Kenner answered softly.
*
Kenner’s eyes burned with heat, and it coursed through Andrea’s body down to her toes. No one had ever called her beautiful. No one had ever looked at her the way Kenner was gazing at her now. No one scared her like Kenner did.
Kenner’s eyes never left hers when she spoke. “I am going to count down from three, Flight Director Finley, and when I get to one, I intend to kiss you. So you have a choice here, Andrea, and you have three seconds to decide.”
Andrea’s heart leaped, her pulse skyrocketed, and nothing existed in the world except her and Kenner right here, right now. She wanted to kiss her, feel her soft lips on hers, taste her again.
Kenner continued to look directly into her eyes. “Three.” Kenner started to lower her head. “Two.” Andrea’s heart beat faster, her mind whirling with indecision. “One.”
The kiss was electric. Kenner’s lips were soft and warm as they glided over hers. Kenner deepened the kiss, and when Andrea opened her mouth, the kiss turned blinding. Andrea struggled to not lose her mind as Kenner’s tongue explored her. She tasted like whiskey and a hint of garlic. She smelled like sunshine and summertime. And when Kenner pressed her body to hers, Andrea felt like she’d just come home.
Andrea wrenched away, covering her mouth with her hand. She gasped to catch her breath, her head spinning. Kenner was looking at her, her expression one of confusion and disbelief. “I have to go,” Andrea said shakily and almost ran off the balcony and back into the main room.
Kenner watched Andrea hurry away. She wasn’t sure what had just happened. Shit, from the moment Andrea had glided into the room tonight she hasn’t been sure what had happened. When Kenner saw Andrea she couldn’t look anywhere else but at her.
Kissing Andrea had been like magic. She’d offered Andrea the opportunity to step away, and when she didn’t, Kenner knew her luck had changed. Her lips were warm and sweet and, after a second’s hesitation, eager. When she’d deepened the kiss, Andrea’s mouth had opened and Kenner could swear she heard her moan. Andrea’s tongue had battled hers for control, or was she feasting on Kenner like Kenner was devouring her? It didn’t matter. What did matter was that when Andrea put her hands in her hair that was the only invitation Kenner needed to press her body against her.
Andrea had molded herself to her, slightly shifting so that Kenner’s leg was pressed against her crotch. The tight dress had prevented any closer contact, but when Andrea had thrust her hips forward in an attempt to get closer, Kenner had responded in ki
nd. Her kisses had become more aggressive, and her hands had started to wander. She’d dragged her lips from Andrea’s to explore her smooth neck, then trailed back up again to claim her luscious mouth.
Kenner was on fire. Her heart raced, her pulse hammered in her head, and she was overcome by desire for Andrea. Their attraction was like spontaneous combustion, and they had been seconds away from doing just that. Her hands drifted lower, and when they met the cool flesh of Andrea’s thighs, she’d almost lost it. She’d forced herself to hold it together but almost lost it again when she started to inch Andrea’s dress up and Andrea had surged into her again.
“Andrea,” Kenner had whispered against her neck as she slid her trembling hand under the dress to caress her hip. When she’d shifted to gain better access, Andrea had wrenched herself away, one hand covering her mouth, the other pulling her dress down. It took Kenner several seconds to realize what had just happened. Andrea was breathing fast, her face flushed with arousal and something else Kenner couldn’t identify.
“Andrea?” Kenner asked softly, moving closer. She’d stopped when Andrea stepped back, a look of shock and fear on her beautiful face.
“Don’t do that again,” Andrea said, her voice shaking. “I have to go.” She’d turned and disappeared into the main room.
It took Kenner several minutes to pull herself together enough to reenter the festivities. The crotch of her briefs was wet and her face felt flush, a testament of how much she wanted Andrea. No way could she walk back into that room looking and feeling like this. But Andrea had, and Kenner wondered how she’d done it.
*
Somehow Andrea made her excuses and her exit without embarrassing herself. Barry was talking to Senator Marconi, who’d been sucking up to the president all night. Most of the crew was still in attendance, as was most of her staff. It looked like the event would go on for several more hours, but it would have to go on without her.
A car was waiting to take her back to the hotel, and when she slid into the backseat and fastened her seat belt, she realized just how exhausted she was. She’d been a nervous wreck ever since receiving the invitation, not only because of the venue and the host but because she might see Kenner again. But she’d never thought she’d kiss her again. Certainly not a kiss that rocked her world like that one just had.
She had practically thrown herself at Kenner without thought of where they were or that any number of very important people could have walked out on the balcony expecting a breath of fresh air and gotten something much more than that. Her career would have been ruined if that had happened. Everything she had sacrificed, had worked and dreamed for, would collapse right before her eyes, dissolve just like she had in Kenner’s arms.
What had come over her? She hadn’t been herself since the shuttle ignition problem began. But who could blame her? First her astronauts were stranded, and then Kenner had arrived and thrown her nice, calm, well-planned mission into total turmoil. And what Kenner did to her was something she still didn’t understand.
Kenner brought out the worst in her, and Andrea didn’t like it. Never before had she lost focus. Never before had she lost concentration. Never before had she lost her temper. Never before had she had sex in her office. Never before had she almost had sex in the White House. The White House, for God’s sake. Never before had she felt like this. Had she completely lost her mind?
She just needed to get back home and return to her life. She had reports to write, a magazine that wanted to do a feature on her, and the next mission to plan for. She would be leading that one as well, and even though it was two years away, she still had plenty to do.
The car door opened and Andrea stepped out into the warm Washington night. She took a moment to admire the lights from the Lincoln Memorial and the Washington Monument, then turned away from the hotel’s front door. She was keyed up and knew sleep was impossible. Maybe a walk would help settle her.
The streets were crowded with bustling tourists and workers in the nation’s capital heading home from another long day at the office. Fanny packs and cameras outnumbered briefcases and wingtips, and Andrea stayed to the inside of the sidewalk so as not to impede those who were moving faster than she was.
She meandered down the street, passing entrances to other hotels and restaurants, with no destination in mind. A professional-looking couple strolled along in front of her, their arms interlocked, their shoulders touching intimately. By observing the way their bodies moved together, so familiar and comfortable, Andrea knew they were lovers. The sound of their laughter drifted behind them to her, and a pang of envy jolted her.
How had this couple met? Who asked the other out first? Who made the first move for a kiss, their first touch, their first sigh of passion? How had they managed to have both a career and what appeared to be a very fulfilling personal life? Did either of them fear where their relationship might lead? Obviously they weren’t afraid to take the risk. How did people get to be that way? She couldn’t remember ever wanting to take a risk in her entire life. How had that happened? Was it her DNA? Had something happened as a child that she didn’t remember? Had she just not encountered a risky situation? Had her life always been boring and sedate?
The couple side stepped into a darkened doorway of a closed coffee shop, where they wrapped their arms around each other and kissed. It wasn’t a groping, tongue-sucking kiss, but it was definitely a prelude to what would come later. Was that what she and Kenner had looked like on the balcony earlier tonight? Did their bodies mold perfectly together like they were made for each other? Did they have the same sense of unspoken urgency for more?
She couldn’t go on like this. Kenner was on her mind all the time. First she couldn’t wait to get rid of her, and now, weeks later, all she wanted to do was see her again. She wanted to listen to her rapid-fire questions, experience her quick mind and sharp comments. To hear her laugh, see her face light up when she smiled. But how could she do that when she’d made it clear to Kenner she didn’t want that? God, what a mess her life was. Andrea turned around and headed back to her hotel.
Chapter Twenty-eight
T-minus 00:00:09:02
Kenner was sure Andrea wouldn’t answer the door, and because of that she didn’t know why she was even here in the first place. Andrea had made it very clear that she wasn’t interested, whether it was for another quickie or anything else. So why was she continuing to stand here moments away from getting kicked in the gut…again?
In the endless seconds that ticked by, the events of the last two months came into focus. She had spent most of her adult life on the prowl. Sex cleared her mind, relaxed the tension that had built up, and just felt good. Damn good. So why not? It was a natural bodily function that God made as an important feature in life. Not having sex was like not going to the bathroom. Everything that came into her body, whether it was food or the stimulation of a beautiful woman, had to come out somehow. To keep it all bottled in was just not healthy. And she did her part to be as healthy as possible.
Until the job at Quantum came along she’d drifted from company to company, growing uninterested in a matter of months. Quantum offered her variety and something puzzling to challenge her every day. She bored easily and thrived on the unknown and where the next assignment or person she met would take her. After the disaster with Eva, she had intended to never get serious with anyone. If you cared, then you could be hurt, and Kenner had definitely no interest in that. She had been all about light and casual, never staying in one place too long. But Andrea had changed all that.
From the first moment Kenner saw her walk into the conference room she’d been fascinated with her. Sure, Andrea was a woman in a traditionally man’s world, but so was she. So what? She’d gotten over it and obviously so had Andrea. Andrea was uptight, and Kenner wanted to see her loosen up. Andrea was serious, and Kenner wanted to see her laugh. Andrea was cool, almost to the point of being cold, and Kenner wanted to watch her melt, wanted to make her melt.
; In the beginning it had been a challenge to prove to herself she could rattle Flight Director Finley’s chain. Then it became a contest of wills, the scaling of a vertical wall that Kenner was not about to lose. She didn’t always intentionally antagonize Andrea, but sometimes she just couldn’t help herself. Andrea was a challenge to be conquered, a mystery to be solved, a puzzle to put together. But their roles had reversed, and Andrea had scrambled her mind when she’d reached for Kenner in her office. That, she would never, ever forget.
“Andrea.” The thick door muffled Kenner’s voice. “I know you’re in there. Don’t try to hide from me.” She knocked again, this time louder. “Andrea, open the door.”
Andrea opened the door, not wanting to cause a scene in the hall. Kenner stood there looking dashing, elegant, and confident all poured perfectly into her impeccably cut suit. Andrea’s heart started banging against her ribs, and her legs felt weak. Kenner was powerfully attractive and Andrea was definitely affected by her appeal.
Neither of them spoke. Andrea felt the caress of Kenner’s look as her eyes moved up and down her body. Her nipples tightened and her stomach tingled. The heat between her legs matched the heat in Kenner’s eyes.
Andrea wanted to know how Kenner had found her, but a woman like Kenner could probably charm information out of anyone. It thrilled and rattled her that she would make the effort. It also scared the shit out of her so she instead she took the offensive. “Did you come here for a reason or to just stand there in the hall?”
Andrea’s sharp words seemed to snap Kenner out of her blinding stupor. “Yes, I’d love to come in. Thanks.”
Andrea tried to block the doorway but Kenner slipped by. “I didn’t invite you in,” Andrea said as she passed.
“Close the door. It’s Washington. Gossip flies around here like leaves in the fall.” Kenner walked farther into the room. “Nice place,” she said, glancing around the room. It was large, with a small couch, two sitting chairs nearby, and a king-sized bed at the far end. “Mine isn’t nearly this big,” she observed.
