by Ted Dekker
“It’s always been possible. Like I said, they are clever.”
His words did nothing to calm her fear.
“How will we know?”
“Evil cannot remain hidden for long. It will be plain to me if not to you.”
Sylous slowly lowered his hand from her face and she felt his power withdraw. She longed for him to touch her longer, be with her longer, stay with her always.
“And now Haven Valley needs to become more vigilant than ever,” he said.
Nothing was clearer to her now than this. They could not waver.
She looked into his eyes. “Jamie speaks of something imminent. Something coming.”
“He lived to tell a tale, so let him tell it,” Sylous said.
He bent forward and gently placed a kiss on her forehead. She closed her eyes, feeling the warmth of his lips wash over her head and shoulders.
“You are so beautiful to me,” he said.
Rose knew he was gone without needing to open her eyes. The familiar song of the sacred communication they shared whispered through her as she stood alone.
Fear me alone, and I will always protect you from evil.
I will never stop fearing you.
Need my truth alone, and I will always watch over you.
I will never stop needing you.
Listen to me, and I will always guide you.
I will listen.
Rose opened her eyes and stared at the empty basement, filled with new resolve. The end was near. So very near.
Chapter
Thirteen
MY STOMACH WAS IN KNOTS AS I KNOCKED ON THE front door of the Pierce home the next day. I watched over the three young Pierce children four days each week, a privilege for which I had always been deeply grateful. Rose had relieved me of my duties yesterday but said nothing more than that. So I’d come, hoping I wasn’t overstepping. But what if I was wrong?
The door opened and little Stephen’s small, sweet face stared up at me. Their youngest son was just five years of age, with lighter skin tones and reddish hair. The tiny boy embodied joy itself.
I smiled as he gave me a little wave. “Hi, Stephen.”
“Hi, Grace!”
Rose entered the hallway behind him. “Stephen, what are you doing?”
“Grace is here.”
Rose pulled her son back and stepped in front of him. She eyed me for a moment and opened the door wider for me to enter. Then she turned back to Stephen, dropped to his level, and spoke firmly. “You know the rules about opening the front door. Only an adult can answer when someone knocks. Are you an adult?”
“No, I’m a boy,” Stephen answered proudly, as if he’d solved a riddle.
“It’s dangerous,” Rose continued. “You never know who will be on the other side. Okay? Do you understand?”
Having heard Rose issue similar warnings to her children in the past, I’d always wondered how anyone in Haven Valley could be dangerous. Now I knew.
Anyone, Bobbie had said.
Little Stephen nodded and waited patiently to be released. Rose sighed and nodded for him to go, and he rushed back down the hallway.
“No running!” Rose shouted after him. “You’ll trip and fall.”
I stepped into the house and shut the door slowly behind me. Rose stood and, without looking at me, headed to the kitchen. Her coldness was unpleasant, but I followed quickly.
The Pierce twins, Evelyn and Levi, sat at the dining table. The ten-year-olds both had light brown hair and light brown eyes, unlike their mother. Both had finished breakfast and were working through their required daily reading, a curriculum designed for the young children growing up in Haven Valley.
Evelyn sat on the right, her shoulders pulled back, eyes on the book. She paid me no mind. Even she was shunning me.
Levi sat on the left, book propped on the table, chin resting in his hand, legs swinging back and forth gently. The moment he saw me, his face brightened. “Hi, Grace. Can I show you how my airplane model is coming?”
“You haven’t finished your reading,” his sister snapped without removing her eyes from her book.
“How do you know if you can’t read my mind?” Levi said.
“Have you finished your reading?” Rose asked from where she stood at the sink.
Levi hesitated. “Almost.”
A small, satisfied grin pulled at the corner of Evelyn’s mouth.
A knock sounded at the front door and Rose glanced at me for the first time. “Can you get that?”
I nodded and returned to the door. It was Megan Rifle, a quirky girl with hair nearly orange as a carrot.
“Hi, Megan. Is everything alright?”
“I was called for.”
I eyed her curiously and opened the door so she could step inside.
She offered me a forced smile. “Thank you.”
Rose looked up at us as we entered the kitchen. “Ah, Megan, so happy to see you.”
“You too, Mrs. Pierce,” Megan said.
“You’re in my home, Megan. You can call me Rose.” She turned to me. “Megan will be joining you today as you watch the children.”
Megan might not have known it herself, but I understood immediately she was actually there to watch me. I reminded myself that this was an outcome of my own making. How could I blame Rose for not trusting me with her children now? Or ever again, for that matter.
“We are diligent in our home, so please pay attention,” Rose said to Megan, reaching for a leather-bound book in the cabinet. I could see uncertainty spark in the girl’s eyes. The book contained a long list of rules that Rose would expect her to memorize immediately. I only half listened as Rose read through each rule and gave detailed examples.
Rules about what they could eat, what they could drink: Particular snacks would be prepared for the children. The water must be boiled for purity and then cooled in the fridge. They weren’t allowed anything outside the home that wasn’t approved.
Rules about the weather: There were approved times of day, depending on the strength of the sun, when the children could be outside as long as specified amounts of sunscreen were used. If it looked like it might rain, the children were to stay inside until any chance of a storm passed. In the event of rain, the children could not be taken outside until the ground dried.
Rules about activities: Approved playtime activities were listed, but they could only play after all required reading and chores had been completed. Running, roughhousing, teasing, tickling, screaming, and too much pretend play were not encouraged, either inside or outside the house.
Rules about how they should appear, rules about how they should speak, rules about how they should interact with others, rules about their daily schedules. On and on, the leather book revealed the rules I knew too well. Rules I’d made sure to enforce, rules I myself considered instilling in my own children in order to provide the safest care possible. Rose loved her children fiercely and showed that love by making sure they were always protected from anything that might harm them.
That potential for harm now included me.
Nausea rolled inside my gut, not the kind spawned by nerves but by illness. I hoped I wasn’t catching whatever afflicted Andrew.
“I understand it’s a lot of information,” Rose said, “so if you have any questions, ask Grace.” She offered Megan a perfunctory smile. “Are we clear?”
Megan clearly had many questions, but she nodded. “Ask Grace.”
“If you must.” Rose faced her three children, all now seated around their kitchen table. “Walk your mother to the door, will you?”
Megan and I remained in the kitchen, avoiding eye contact as the children obliged their mother. Their tones were hushed, but it wasn’t a very big house and I could hear every word clear as day.
“Are you sure you have to leave us?” Evelyn asked.
“Yes, sweetheart, you’ll be fine.”
“But she broke the law. I don’t feel safe with her.”
“Then
stay close to Megan, sweetie. That’s why she’s here.”
“Can Grace give me her sin?” little Stephen asked.
“No. Sin is a choice you make. Just follow the rules and you’ll be safe.”
A moment later I heard the front door close. All three children returned to complete their studies at the kitchen table.
Evelyn refused to look at me.
THE AFTERNOON SKY WAS BRIGHT BLUE WITH LARGE puffy white clouds, the breeze warm and welcoming—the perfect afternoon for a short walk. So I gathered up the Pierce children with Megan’s help, packed approved water and food, and set out to walk along the approved paths that led toward the farmland east of town.
Though at first annoyed and hurt to have Megan watching over me, I was now thankful she was near. She really was good with the children, laughing and singing with them, showing interest in their interests, being cautious and following the rules.
I loved the Pierce children as if they were my own. I’d cared for them when they were sick, put them to sleep, made them laugh. I couldn’t pretend I wasn’t deeply wounded by Evelyn’s total disdain for me, but I knew it was my own fault. More than the other children, she was sensitive to anything remotely close to breaking the law. When her siblings broke rules she suffered just as much as they did.
Nausea rolled through my stomach again, and for a passing moment I was sure I’d throw up my lunch. I tried to keep my focus ahead, breathing deeply, letting the fresh air fill my lungs.
The path we traveled behind the main stretch of town was marked clearly. Mowed grass grew along the left side of the path; to the right was a wild field that stretched out to the forest a hundred feet away. Forbidden ground.
Another wave of nausea washed over me, and I knew I wasn’t going to be able to hold it back. I placed my hand on Megan’s shoulder. “I’m not feeling very well. Let’s stop here for a moment. I’m going to run up to the bathroom inside the market, okay?”
“Sure.” Megan nodded and announced they would sit along the path for a little while and look for shapes in the clouds. That seemed to appease the kids.
I hurried toward the street and made it around the corner of the brick market building before the nausea overtook me.
Bending at the waist, I threw up on the ground along the building’s wall. It burned coming up, making my eyes water and my head pound. Again I heaved, then once more, vomiting up all I’d consumed in the last couple hours. Still bent, both palms on the brick in front of me, I placed my forehead against the wall between my hands and took shallow breaths.
I couldn’t remember the last time I’d thrown up or felt so sick. It made me wonder if the Fury had infected Jamie with something and he’d passed it on to me. Or maybe I had caught something sleeping in that cave.
A small cry of alarm reached my ear—one of the children—and I hurried to the corner of the market where I could see Megan and the children. Evelyn was standing in the middle of the path, pointing at Stephen, who had wandered out into the tall uncut grass.
Oh no!
I threw a glance up the street, hoping no one was watching. No one I could see. Megan was rushing out into the tall grass to collect Stephen.
She had scooped up little Stephen and was coming back, face white with fear, by the time I reached them. Evelyn was staring out across the grass, tears gathered in her eyes, small hands trembling.
I knelt beside her. “Evelyn?”
“We aren’t allowed off the path,” she said. “The grass isn’t safe! It’s tall and full of dangers.”
“He’s okay, Evelyn.”
“No, no! He isn’t allowed.”
And if Rose found out there would be consequences. Especially now, after all the trouble Jamie and I had caused.
“It’s going to be okay. No one is hurt. We can pretend nothing even happened.”
I reached up to touch her shoulder, but she pulled back from me. “That’s lying.”
And just like that, I’d boxed myself into a corner. But I was desperate to get out.
“I would never lie,” I said. “I just meant we can pretend for now. Until we tell your mother.”
Megan stepped back onto the path, set Stephen down, and began checking him over, brushing off stray blades of grass. She looked up at me, searching for redemption and guidance. “I thought he was sitting right beside me,” she said, voice strained.
“He wanders,” I said. “I should’ve told you.”
“We aren’t allowed off the path!” Evelyn cried. “There are chiggers in the grass! He’s going to get sick and then we’ll all get sick.”
Megan frantically looked Stephen over for bites.
“I got bit by bugs?” Stephen asked, fear mounting in his thin voice. “I don’t want to be sick.”
“You won’t get sick,” Megan assured him, but she didn’t sound convinced.
“He was bitten!” Evelyn insisted. “He’ll get sick and then get us all sick!”
Outbreaks of a rash had visited Haven Valley on a number of occasions, never with any clear explanation. Allergies, some said. Something in the air from the Fury, perhaps. No one seemed to know, but rashes had spread like wildfire and lasted for a few weeks before passing.
Evelyn was mixing up this incident with those outbreaks.
“No, honey, he wasn’t bitten,” I said, reaching out to touch her again.
“Don’t touch me!” she screamed. “This is all your fault!”
I yanked my hand back. Her words were like a slap across my face.
“We have to get him home and bathed now!” Evelyn yelled.
“He wasn’t bitten,” Megan echoed.
“He has to be stripped and bathed.” Evelyn itched her arm as if she’d been bitten herself. “They could be everywhere!”
I nodded at Megan and we quickly steered the three children back toward the Pierce house. We needed to get them home where they would at least feel safe.
Evelyn scratched at her skin the entire way.
Chapter
Fourteen
BEN SPLASHED COOL WATER OVER HIS FACE FROM THE faucet they’d found in a long-abandoned gas station, gripping the sink’s side for support. It was the kind of bathroom that required a key from the cashier inside, when it was in order. This one had no door.
He glanced up into the broken mirror. Seeing him, no one would be surprised to hear he was dying. He coughed into his hand and grimaced at the pain in his chest. His head was pounding. Blood speckled his hand when he pulled it away from his mouth. He placed it under the running water and watched the red wash down the sink.
Eli was in the truck waiting. If the boy saw the blood he might insist they stay the night somewhere close, or worse, go to a hospital. They were close now. One more long push and then he could rest.
The lyrics from “Carry On Wayward Son” hummed through his brain. He and Eli had heard the song half a dozen times over the last two days, as if it were playing just for them.
Yes, Ben thought, there will be peace when I’m done. But not yet.
He scooped water into the palm of his hand, swirled it around in his mouth, and spit it back into the sink. Turned the faucet off. It was a strange thing to know that once he completed this task there was nothing left for him.
His brain filled with images from the past. The time he’d first seen Julianna. Long blonde hair, golden-brown eyes, a world of excitement waiting to be explored in her smile. He’d been spellbound instantly.
Julianna had stolen his heart at a time when he was searching for worth and significance. Both young and uncertain about the world, they’d built their lives around one another. They’d become each other’s missing part, an idea the world dressed up in beautifully poetic language. In reality their dependence on each other had become a kind of slavery, bound by a knot.
But that knot failed to deliver the promised bliss. So they’d pressed on, desperate to be saved by each other. When that knot finally unraveled, they were left with threadbare souls.
He’
d spent so much time being angry with Julianna for taking the children. And yet now, even after so many years and such distance, his heart skipped a beat when she crossed his mind. He longed to tell her how precious she was.
Eli was reading a newspaper when Ben climbed back into the driver’s seat. The boy’s bare feet were perched on the dash, ankles crossed, newspaper opened like a book in front of him.
“Where’d you get that?” Ben asked, closing his door.
“At the free news box,” Eli said.
Ben glanced out the boy’s window to see a dispenser with “Free” and “Take One” plastered across the glass.
“Anything good?” Ben asked.
Eli looked up out the windshield. He scrunched his nose and laughed at something only he was thinking, then returned his eyes to the newspaper. “I think everything is good,” he said.
Ben nodded and turned over the engine. The truck roared to life. Before shifting into drive, he reached into the plastic bag of goods he’d found inside and pulled out a round package. He playfully tossed the package into Eli’s lap. “Look what I found.”
Eli squealed with delight, dropped the paper, and grabbed the gift with both hands. “Powdered donuts!”
“I thought you might like that.”
Chapter
Fifteen
I WALKED THROUGH THE BACK DOOR OF OUR HOME, hoping to escape to my bedroom. My body was exhausted. Rose’s sharp reprimand still echoed in my mind. Even after Evelyn was safely home, her panic continued to escalate. We sent for Rose, and by the time she arrived Evelyn’s forearm had broken out into a bright red rash.
Stephen, who’d gone into the grass, was fine. Not a mark on him.
The look of anger in Evelyn’s teary eyes as I left the Pierce home haunted me. I was scheduled to care for the children in two days, but I wasn’t sure Rose would allow it.
I could hear my mother’s soft voice in the kitchen. She was talking to someone? I stooped to remove my shoes, wiped them clean, and hurried down the hall.
Jamie was sitting at the kitchen table, listening to my mother as she cooked dinner. My surprise melted to joy, and I flew across the room to embrace my brother.
