by Adele Abbott
“I hope I didn’t build your hopes too high.”
“Not at all. I’ve hardly given it a thought.” Only every second of every minute of every hour since he’d told me.
“Come through to the other room, and I’ll show you.” I didn’t need telling twice. “There you are.” He pointed to the table.
‘There you are’? I was trying to figure out what I was meant to be looking at.
“There, on the table—look.”
All I could see was a pile of booklets.
“It’s my new brochure. The one you helped me to produce.”
“Your brochure?”
“Yes. Here—take a look.” He handed one to me. “Don’t you think the printers have done an excellent job?”
“Excellent.” This was the surprise? This is what I’d been building myself up for?
“I think what they’ve done with the cover is absolutely fantastic. Don’t you agree?”
“The cover? Yeah—fantastic.”
“Take a look inside. Your photo is in there.”
I could barely summon up the enthusiasm to flick through the pages. When Kathy found out about this, my life wouldn’t be worth living. How had I managed to do this to myself again? Would I ever learn? What exactly had I thought the surprise would be? Had I expected him to sweep me off my feet, and carry me into the bedroom? I had to face it—I really was delusional.
“What do you think?” he said.
“It’s very nice.”
“Look, there’s the photo of you.”
“Oh yes.” I hated photos of myself.
“And look at the little speech bubble at the side where you say how much you’ve got from my services.”
“Chance would be a fine thing!”
“Sorry?”
Had I actually said that out loud? “I was just saying, the brochure is first class. I’m really pleased you decided to show it to me.”
“That’s not the only surprise, Jill.”
“It isn’t?” There was still hope!
“Of course not. I really want to show my gratitude for your help with this.”
Now we’re talking! Yes, Luther! Please show me your gratitude. I need to see your hot, sexy gratitude right now.
“I’d like to take you out for dinner. It’s the least I can do. I hope you don’t mind, but I’ve taken the liberty of booking a table.”
“When for?”
“Tomorrow, if that suits you?”
Yes! Result! “That would be very nice.”
See? What did I tell you? He did have feelings for me, but he wanted to wine and dine me before acting on them. I’d been right all along! The brochure had just been a ploy to get me into his flat. Now we were going out on our first real date, and I couldn’t wait.
Chapter 4
Nobody made breakfast like Aunt Lucy. Porridge followed by yummy bacon, eggs, sausage and the rest. Clearly I wasn’t the only one who thought so, because the twins were already seated at the kitchen table when I arrived.
They were giggling. I always worried when they giggled.
“What’s going on with you two?”
“Nothing.” Amber shrugged. “What makes you think there’s something going on?”
“I know you two. Something’s happened. What is it, Pearl?”
“Well—” she said. “It’s Grandma.”
That wasn’t good news.
“What about her?”
“You’ll never guess,” Amber said.
“No, I won’t. So tell me.”
“It’s the last thing in the world you would expect.” Pearl giggled.
“If you don’t tell me right now, I’m going to pour this porridge over your heads.”
“No need to be so ratty.” Amber pouted. “We’re only having a laugh.”
“So are you going to tell me or what?”
“Grandma’s entering a competition.”
“What kind of competition?”
“You’ll never guess,” Pearl said.
“We’ve done this already! Just tell me what kind of competition she’s entering.”
“A ‘Glamorous Grandmother’ competition.”
“Oh yeah. Very funny. Seriously, what’s the competition?”
“It’s true!” Amber insisted. “She is, honestly.”
“You two are winding me up. Just how stupid do you think I am?”
“They’re not,” Aunt Lucy said. “They’re telling the truth.”
“A glamorous grandmother competition?” I laughed. “Doesn’t she own a mirror?”
“That’s rather cruel.” Aunt Lucy gave me a disapproving look. “True, but still cruel.”
“She can’t possibly think she stands a chance?”
“She’s taking it very seriously.” Aunt Lucy picked up the empty porridge bowl. “And if she is, we’d better do the same.”
“How am I supposed to keep a straight face when she tells me about it?”
“You’d better try or you’ll be in big trouble.”
I heard the front door open.
“She’s here now,” Aunt Lucy said. “She said she was coming around this morning.”
“Oh no. I’d better be going.” I made to stand up.
“You stay right where you are.” Aunt Lucy put a hand on my shoulder. “If we have to deal with this, so do you.”
Betrayed by my own stomach. If I hadn’t been tempted by Aunt Lucy’s breakfast, I would have missed this travesty.
“Good morning, ladies,” Grandma said. “And Jill.”
She did it every time. She knew just how to wind me up.
“Morning, Grandma,” everybody said.
“Have you told Jill my news?”
“No,” the twins chorused.
Aunt Lucy shook her head.
They were doing this deliberately.
“Good. I wanted to tell her myself.” She turned her evil eye on me. “You’ll be pleased to hear that I’ve decided to enter Candlefield’s Glamorous Grandmother competition.”
I mustn’t laugh. If I laughed, I was dead. If I laughed, she’d turn me into a frog or something even worse.
“Really?” I cleared my throat to stifle the laugh. “Sorry, I’ve got a bit of a cough. That’s nice. When is it?”
“Don’t worry. I’ll let you have all the details. I expect all of you to be there to support me.”
“Yes, Grandma, we’ll be there,” Amber said.
She was such a creep.
“Yes, we’ll be there in the front row rooting for you,” Pearl said.
Creeps, the pair of them.
“I’ll be there, Mother,” Aunt Lucy said.
They all made me sick.
“What about you, Jill?”
“I’ll be there too, Grandma. I can’t wait to cheer you on.”
What do you mean? Who are you calling a hypocrite?
As soon as Aunt Lucy and I were alone, she said, “Have you thought any more about what I told you? About your father wanting to see you?”
I’d thought about little else since.
When I’d first learned about my family in Washbridge, I’d wrongly assumed that my father was dead. It was only later that I found out he was still alive. He’d walked out on my mother before I was born, and that had been the last anyone had seen or heard of him. I knew he’d been a very powerful wizard, but that he’d been tempted by black magic, and had fallen in with a bad crowd. Why had he come back now? And, why did he want to see me?
“Jill? What do you think?”
I’d zoned out.
“I don’t want to see him.”
Aunt Lucy looked surprised, but perhaps also relieved. “Are you sure?”
“Absolutely sure. I have all the family I need. I have my adoptive family in Washbridge, and I have you guys here in Candlefield. I can understand why my mother gave me up; she had good reason. But my father? Why should I see him? He never cared about me.”
“Would you like more time to think about it?”
>
“No. Tell him I don’t want to see him, and not to get in touch with me ever again.”
***
Barry came bounding over as soon as I went upstairs in Cuppy C. He was back to his bubbly self.
“Can we go for a walk? Can we go now? Can we go to the park? Please, please? Can we?”
“Whoa! Steady on there. You’re looking much happier than the last time I saw you.”
“Oh yes. I feel great.”
“How are you getting along with Hamlet?”
“We’re good friends now.”
“I’m really pleased to hear that.”
“He reads me stories.”
“He does?”
“Yes, a bedtime story, every night. At the moment he’s reading me one about a giant lobster.”
“That sounds—great.”
“It is. It’s very exciting. His name’s Duke.”
“Who?”
“The lobster. He’s like a super hero lobster.”
“Oh right. I’ve never heard of that book.”
“You should ask Hamlet to lend it to you after he’s finished reading it to me.”
“I might do that.”
“I have some other really exciting news.” Barry was so manic that he could hardly stand still.
“What’s that?”
“I have a girlfriend.”
“You do?” This was news to me. “Who is she?”
“Her name’s Beth.”
“And where does Beth live?”
“Next door to Aunt Lucy.”
“What is she?”
“She’s a dog, like me.”
“Yeah, I know that. I meant—never mind.”
“She’s beautiful. I’m in love with her.”
“That’s nice. And does Beth love you?”
“I don’t know. I haven’t spoken to her yet, but I’ve seen her through Aunt Lucy’s bedroom window. I know she’ll love me too.”
“I see.” This was beginning to sound a lot like my relationships.
It was nice to see Barry happy again, and really kind of Hamlet to read to him. More surprisingly, Barry apparently now had a love interest, which was more than could be said of me. But then, I did have my dinner date with Luther to look forward to, so maybe soon Barry wouldn’t be the only one with a love life.
I lived in hope.
***
I was in serious shopping mode when my phone rang.
“Oh, so you are still alive?” Kathy said. “I was beginning to wonder.”
“I’ve been busy.”
“I thought you might have called to let me know how you got on with Luther, and to tell me what his little surprise was.”
“Like I said, I’ve been up to my neck in it.”
“So I take it that you and he are not an item?”
“If you must know, Luther is taking me to dinner tonight.”
“Well, colour me shocked.”
“Oh ye of little faith.”
“What was his surprise?”
“Err—the dinner date.” I thought it best not to mention the brochures. “He wanted to surprise me by telling me about the dinner date.”
“Where are you now?”
“In town shopping.”
“You wouldn’t be looking for a new outfit by any chance, would you?”
“Maybe.”
“What about that little black number you bought for the last date?”
“I can’t wear that. Luther’s already seen it. Look, did you call for anything in particular? I am rather busy.”
“Excuse me for wanting to speak to my sister.”
“It’s just that I do have rather a lot of shopping to do, and I’ve got an appointment to have my hair done—and a manicure.”
“Wow! You really are pushing the boat out. Let’s hope you haven’t read more into it than there is, this time.”
“He asked me out for dinner. He’s booked a table. This time it’s a real date.”
“Let’s hope you’re right.”
***
In the end, I chose a rather unsubtle red number. It was an ‘if you’ve got it, flaunt it’ type of dress. Or, in my case, ‘if you’ve got a little bit of it, make the most of it’.
We’d arranged to meet at the restaurant at eight o’clock. By the time I arrived, I was as nervous as a kitten. I’d had the hots for Luther ever since he’d replaced my previous accountant, Robert Roberts. It was obvious now that Luther felt the same way about me. Why else would he have asked me out to dinner? I was sure—this was going to be the start of something big.
The maître d’ greeted me with a false smile.
“Good evening. Does madam have a reservation?”
“I’m meeting Mr Luther Stone.”
He checked the book. “Ah yes. Mr Stone’s party is over in the far corner. Follow me, please.”
So Luther was already here? That was a good sign. He was obviously keen. And better still, we were in a section of the restaurant, which I could see had subdued lighting. Maybe tonight was the night, after all?
“Jill! I’m so pleased you could make it,” Luther said. “Do come and join us.”
Us? Do come and join us? He was sitting at a table with ten other people.
I forced a smile. What was going on? This was meant to be our dinner date.
“You probably recognise everyone?”
Sure enough, the faces were familiar. They were all people who’d posed for the photographs which had been included in Luther’s brochure. This must have been his way of thanking them. Of thanking all of us. It wasn’t a cosy little dinner date for two after all.
The only free chair was at the opposite end of the table from Luther. As I took my seat, I noticed that the young woman sitting next to him wasn’t someone from the brochure. The last time I’d seen her was when she and Luther had come to my flat. It was Loo—sin—da, and she looked awfully friendly with Luther.
“Waiter!” I called. “Get me a vodka. Make it a large one!”
Chapter 5
When I woke the next morning, I wondered for a moment if the dinner date that wasn’t had just been a bad dream. I quickly realised that it had been only too real. It had been bad enough having to make small talk with ten total strangers, but the worst part had been having to watch Lucinda flirting with Luther all night long.
Oh, well. He’d had his chance and he’d blown it. I was done with him.
The last time I’d seen my neighbour, Mr Ivers, he’d been depressed, but this morning, there’d been a total transformation. The man was smiling from ear to ear.
“Jill! Hello! Isn’t it a beautiful day?”
It was cold and raining, but I didn’t see any reason to dampen his spirits. “You’re looking very pleased with life.”
“I am, and it’s all down to you.”
“Really? What did I do?”
“Don’t be so modest. I have you to thank for referring me to Love Spell.”
I’d forgotten all about that. Mr Ivers had been so down because he didn’t have a girlfriend that I’d suggested he join the Love Spell dating agency. It was an agency which specialised in matching witches from Candlefield with human men from Washbridge. At the time, I’d thought maybe I’d made a mistake, and that the girls from Love Spell would be annoyed that I’d referred boring Mr Ivers to them. Far from it; they’d been quite happy to have him on their books. According to them, there was quite a demand for movie buffs among the female witch population. Who knew?
“How’s that going? Have you been on any dates?”
“Only one, but I’m pleased to report that it was a great success. I’ve actually met my special someone! We’ve been out together a couple of times.”
Unbelievable. How come I couldn’t get a date for love nor money, but Mr Ivers, the most boring man in the world, had hit it off first time. Not that I was bitter. Not in the least.
“Her name is Wendy; she loves the movies.”
No real surprises there.
&n
bsp; “She has a fantastic knowledge of the cinema for a woman.”
Oh dear—please don’t say that to her—ever!
“She really knows her stuff. Anyway, I’m pleased that I’ve bumped into you. I was thinking maybe Wendy and I could go on a double date with you and—err—what’s the name of the man you’re dating?”
Good question. “I’m afraid I’m rather busy at the moment, Mr Ivers. I’ve got a lot of cases on. I’m not sure I’ll be able to make it for the foreseeable future.”
“That’s a shame. Wendy would love to meet you.”
“And I’d love to meet her, but like I said. I’m jammed with work at the moment.”
“I’m sure you’ll like her, Jill. I call her my lucky charm.”
“Why’s that?”
“It’s really strange. Ever since we’ve been together, everything seems to be going my way. The other day, for example, we went out together to the local park. It was really hot and sticky, and I mentioned to Wendy that I was feeling quite uncomfortable in the heat. And then, the strangest thing happened: a single rain cloud appeared above my head, and it started to rain. The curious thing was that it didn’t seem to rain on anyone else. I mean, what were the chances of that happening?”
“That’s amazing.” And it sounded very much like magic to me. Didn’t Wendy realise that she wasn’t meant to let her human dates know she was a witch?
“And another strange thing happened. You know how I love liquorice allsorts?”
“I didn’t actually know that.”
“Oh, yes. I adore them. The other day we were watching a movie, and I could have sworn I’d eaten the last one. I was just about to say I wished we’d bought more of them when the bag was suddenly full again! Wendy said I must have been mistaken.”
“Yeah, that must have been it.” Or, more likely, Wendy had used the ‘take it back’ spell.
“Since I met Wendy, things seem to have clicked into place. So, I just wanted to thank you.”
“My pleasure, Mr Ivers. I’m pleased I could help.”
And off he went on his merry way, whistling as he went. Maybe I should have a quiet word with Wendy before she overstepped the mark, and got picked up by the Rogue Retrievers?
***
Mrs V appeared to be pulling at her desk as though she was trying to stand up.
