“Sure, I’ll die from the cold before I pass out from these wounds. What’s the plan?”
He looked at her, waiting for her answer but she had no idea. They were out in the middle of nowhere, with the snow and ice on the roads they’d be lucky to find someone to help them, and now all their supplies and clothes were blown up with the car.
“Back into the forest, I guess,” Lincoln started to drag himself over to her. His hind leg was badly injured, he was just dragging it limply behind him leaving a grizzly red trail in the snow. “Shift, baby, and I’ll help you walk.”
With her shoulder under his arm and Caden still unconscious slung over Caleb’s back, they started to walk into the trees. Lexia walked past Derrick not even noticing him. His hand reached out and wrapped around her ankle. Startled Lexia snatched her foot away, looking down at him. “Please... Take me with you,” he croaked, and for a split second Lexia was certain the gold of his eyes dulled.
“I’m sorry, Derrick, I can’t carry you as well,” she whispered, moving away quickly as he dragged himself after her.
“What was that all about?” Lincoln asked.
But Lexia never had the chance to explain Derrick because as she slipped into the trees, Lincoln’s heavy frame weighing her down, she heard the screech of tires and the slam of a door and the next thing she felt was a sharp stab in her back and the immediate numbness that seemed to spread from that spot.
Chapter 33
Caden had been left in the snow, Caleb was nowhere in sight, and as the numbness took over, Lexia knew this was it, her time was up. Slowly it spread, drugging her muscles until they were heavy and even standing became too much for them.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered to Lincoln as she dropped to her knees, the snow immediately freezing her.
He turned to her his eyes full of worry and love, brushed his lips to hers and breathed into her mouth, “Never give up.” He shifted and turned, running on three legs, his back leg just daggling as if it wasn’t connected to his body anymore.
Lexia felt another sharp stab in her right arm, she pulled the dart out quickly but already the drug had started to spread through her veins. Her knife dropped from her hand as her fingers became so numb she couldn’t hold the ruby-glittered hilt anymore.
Lincoln’s words whispered through her sluggish mind, never give up, and as she felt two dark energies approaching her from behind she picked up her knife with her left hand and with a yell forced her arm to swing, strong and straight, slicing through the first Hunter’s middle and then the second. As she stumbled forward another SUV pulled up and her mother got out. Lexia felt as if she was in her own little bubble, a veil surrounded her, numbing her body and muffling the sounds around her. She swung her drugged useless arm, slicing her knife into anyone in her way. Lincoln dripped blood, each drop soaking into the snow beneath him creating a gruesome polka dot blanket at his feet. By sheer will he was still fighting, desperately trying to save her. Lexia kept walking forward, each small step feeling like a mile. More Hunters seemed to descend on them in slow motion. Lexia’s head turned from side to side but she couldn’t see Caleb anywhere. A few dead hunters lay discarded at the edge of the trees. He’s hiding in the trees, she thought as her legs gave out.
Hunters held her down but still she wouldn’t give up, wouldn’t let the grip on her knife lessen. She swiped madly, screaming at them, dragging her knees through the deep snow to try and reach her panther who had collapsed now, blood seeping around him.
“ENOUGH!” Lucy bellowed.
Lexia’s eyes sought out her mother, finding her leaning against the SUV. She stepped forward, a look of mild amusement on her face. She smiled at Lexia, walking over as she still struggled against the Hunters trying to take her.
Lucy’s steps were slow but deliberate. A gun was pulled from its holster and aimed at Lincoln.
“NO!” Lexia screeched.
Lucy looked at her with a smile, her eyes sparkling with delight. “What was that, dear? I didn’t quite hear you.”
“Please, please don’t kill him.”
“Why not? He’ll be dead soon enough anyway. Look at all the injuries he’s sustained trying to protect you. Really, Maura, I’m doing you a favor; if I shoot him now, he will die by my hand. If I let him go, well, then it’s your fault, isn’t it?”
“No,” Lexia whispered, shaking her head, trying to keep her tears at bay.
“Yes, dear, it is. You insisted on running and now he’ll be left out here along with the other animal you’ve killed. No one will find them before they die.”
Lucy kicked the panther with a laugh. “See? He can’t even defend himself. Do you not see what you’ve done to him, Maura?”
“Get off him, get off him! I’m going to kill you, EVEN IF IT’S THE LAST THING I DO!” Lexia yelled, the rage clearing her mind a little, giving her the strength to throw off the two Hunters holding her.
Lucy pointed the gun again. “One more step and he dies and I’ll go kill the other filthy animal for good measure, too.” Lucy’s voice had changed in an instant from the sweet angelic voice she normally talked in, to a cold deadly one, each syllable full of menace.
Lexia stopped, all her strength leaving her; she dropped to the floor, defeated.
“Now dear,” Lucy said, her sweet voice back, “what have you done with Derrick? He’s my favorite, you know.”
Lexia said nothing, her eyes fixed on her panther, willing him to get up.
“Found him, ma’am,” someone said, dragging Derrick over with him half-slumped over their shoulder.
“Oh dear, whatever happened to you?” Lucy gasped as if she really cared.
“I’m fine,” Derrick muttered.
“Yes, yes, stick him in my car, were almost finished here.” She turned and looked around her again as if forgetting where she was. “Now where was I? Oh yes, killing the animals and taking what’s mine.”
“What NO! No, please... Please, Mother.”
Lucy smiled at Lexia as the word Mother left her lips.
“I’ll join you.”
“What was that, dear?” Lucy asked with a glint in her eye.
“I said I will join you but only if you leave Lincoln and Caden alone and never touch them again. They die and I will spend the rest of my life hunting you down.”
“You have to join me even if I kill the panther or not, Maura dear, there is no fighting your way out of this one.”
“You’re right. I can’t stop you from taking me with you but I won’t join you, I’ll never stop fighting, never!”
Lucy laughed. “So dramatic, darling. Let her go, Tanner, I have what I came for.”
“Lex, no.” The quietest of whispers left Lincoln’s throat as he shifted. Lexia dragged herself towards him but her path was blocked.
“At least let me say goodbye.” Lexia looked into Lucy’s eyes trying to read her cold calculating face. “Please, Mother,” she begged.
Lucy’s face softened for a split second. “Let her say goodbye to the animal.”
Lexia dropped to her knees, lifting Lincoln’s blood-streaked face onto her lap.
“Linc, this is the only way, do you not see? If I don’t join them you will forever be in danger. They will hunt you to get to me.”
“No, Lex, don’t damn yourself for me. Please, we will find a way,” Lincoln rasped, trying to keep his eyes open.
“Don’t you get it? I can’t live in a world without you in it. I can’t have you but at least I know you will be safe... Alive.”
“Lex.”
“I love you, Lincoln,” Lexia breathed into his mouth, crushing her lips to his. Unsure whether she’d ever kiss him again, Lexia etched the memory in her mind: the feel of his soft lips, the taste of him on her tongue, and the feeling of his hair running through her fingers. She pulled back and looked into his golden-brown eyes; they held warmth and love. Her tears splashed onto his skin, and Lexia looked one last time at the face that was her home.
She looke
d up, feeling utterly detached from the world; her eyes glanced at Caden still unconscious. Good bye, sweet leopard, she thought. Lincoln’s bloody hands clung onto her as she stood, the drugs in her system made her head spin. Her eyes caught movement in the tree tops and she found Caleb’s chocolate brown eyes watching her. She could read in his eyes that he planned to jump down and attack but Lexia knew it was over, she’d known when she’d woke this morning her time was up.
Shaking her head the slightest fraction, Lexia looked at him and hoped he understood; he needed to save Lincoln and Caden, not her.
“You promised me, Lex, you promised,” Lincoln gasped at her, his last ditch effort to stop her.
Lexia forced her tears to stop and answered in a calm level voice, “I promised you’d never have to live in a world that I wasn’t in. I’m still keeping my promise, I’ll be alive.” Her hand rubbed over her heart. “We’ll always be connected, always, they can never take that away from us, remember? Remember what we talked about? You own my heart Lincoln; it will always be yours... Goodbye, my pretty panther.”
Lexia turned and ran away, stumbling as her heavy numbed legs tried to move. She climbed into the SUV as the first broken sob left her.
“Lexia!” Lincoln screamed, dragging himself through the snow.
Silent tears streamed down her face as she closed the door. She turned as the car started to pull away, she felt like a great weight was pressing down on her chest; the pain in her heart became more unbearable the further she got from Lincoln. What am I doing? I can’t leave him! I want to go back, oh please, let me go back.
As the car turned onto the road, her heart hammering in her chest so wildly Lexia thought surely at any moment it would just burst, she looked one last time at the man that she loved. Tears glistening on his face as it contorted in pain and misery; Caleb holding him back desperately trying to console him. Her heart stopped. Where once blood, warmth and love pumped through her veins, now only emptiness filled them, she didn’t feel alive anymore - Lincoln owned her heart and that’s where she’d left it, broken and bleeding on the floor beside him.
“Shush, Lexia, shush.”
Her eyes focused on the face that had spoken, Derrick’s face.
What do you mean shush?
That’s when Lexia registered screams filling the car, feral, soul-retching screams and they were coming from her. She closed her mouth but her tears wouldn’t stop flowing.
Derrick rubbed his hand gently up and down her arm, his eyes full of sadness, and Lexia hated that she just wanted to melt into him, to try and soothe the wild edge of her pain. She hated herself so much. You did this to yourself, you walked away from him! She screamed in her head. You deserve this pain, Lexia. You have just ripped out Lincoln’s heart, you left him, you gave up when you promised him you never would.
As the self-hatred filtered through her head, she welcomed the pain. The hatred and emptiness that filled her, it was what she deserved. Her mother was right, she was darkness and now she’d brought that darkness into Lincoln’s life forever.
“Knock her out, Derrick!” Lucy snapped.
Lexia never even put up a fight as Derrick stabbed the shot into her neck.
She’d given up fighting...
She’d given up fighting when she promised Lincoln she never would.
Chapter 34
Lexia had lost all track of time. She had no idea how long she’d been trapped in the Hunter compound, how long since she’d left Lincoln, how long her mother had been torturing her, or doing ‘experiments’ as she liked to call them.
It must have been weeks, she thought, weeks of torture, of her mother wanting to see how long it would take for her to recover from cuts, breaks, starvation. It was ‘natural,’ her mother had said, natural for her to want to find her weakness, to see how well she’d done when creating her. Lexia knew now all she was to Lucy Hunter was an experiment, she didn’t see her as a daughter, but as her property.
And Lucy Hunter treated her property as she wished.
Lexia shuddered at the remembered pain from her mother breaking her leg. Lexia remembered the delight in her eyes as she snapped her bone until it jutted from her shin, and listened to her scream and beg for her to stop. Lexia soon learned that begging only made it worse, screaming only made it worse. So she’d learnt to take the pain, learnt to control any emotion. Of course Lexia screamed and begged on the inside, but to Lucy Hunter she saw her creation finally being all she could be.
Lexia’s throat was so dry, each breath she dragged in burnt. Her stomach ached from not eating. When was the last time I had food, water? When was the last time I saw anybody?
Lexia hung chained to the wall, straps on her ankles and wrists, one around her waist. She’d been drifting in and out of consciousness for a while now. The cuts on her body had stopped healing; it seemed that if she was starved long enough then her body stopped fixing itself.
Lexia wanted to die; she’d given up hoping for a way out and just wanted it to be over. She wasn’t sure what she had been expecting when she left Lincoln but it wasn’t this, she’d thought her mother would have wanted to put her strength, her abilities to use.
She’d done this for Lincoln, she’d seen no other way out at the time. She supposed she always knew it would come to this, she’d known deep down that she couldn’t run from what she was. If I die now will Linc die, too? Caden had once told her that when a shifter lost a mate, they’d die shortly after. But he’d already lost her, she might as well be dead and yet he was still alive, inside her heart. Would losing that link kill him? Lexia knew that link brought Lincoln nothing but pain now. He might not be with her in person but he’d felt every cut, felt her fear as if it was his own, just as she felt the frantic unbearable need he had to find her. That force of light, of love, still clinging to what little hope there was left. She hated that Lincoln had to suffer with her, wished she could just cut the link so he’d never have to feel the pain Lucy put her through and yet Lexia thought that link was the only thing that kept her heart beating.
What she hated the most was just hanging there thinking over all the mistakes she’d made, people she’d killed. Why can’t I just die? Maybe I don’t deserve to die, that would be cheating, I deserve to hang here and rot.
Unconscious called her again and she went willingly, didn’t fight to stay awake. Maybe I’ll see Linc...
Only Lexia never saw Lincoln. Even in her subconscious Lexia was tortured, chased by monsters, haunted by the faces of those she’d killed. She found no rest, no peace. She ran and screamed in her mind, praying, begging for death and still her heart kept beating. Pumping her blood sluggishly through her veins, Lexia thought that the heart was the only organ that could be so irrevocably damaged and still work. How was it she felt so dead on the inside, so detached from the world and could still be alive?
The sound of footsteps outside, the turn of the lock on her cell door had Lexia snapping into consciousness, her heart picking up speed and a cold sweat breaking out over her skin.
Oh god, oh god...
Lexia hated the fear that flooded through her but she couldn’t control it. She feared her mother, feared the pain she could cause. But it wasn’t Lucy’s pale angelic face that walked through the door and turned to lock it behind them.
It was Derrick.
She tried to say his name but her throat was so dry; her lips cracked and bleeding, that the only sound she made was a small squeak.
“Lexia,” he murmured, rushing towards her.
She couldn’t control herself as she flinched away from his touch.
“Its okay, Lexia. I won’t hurt you.”
Lexia’s head slumped forward, her chin resting on her bloody chest. What had happened to her? She used to be strong, she used to look her enemy in eye. But now? Now she was broken and defeated, her mother had successfully tortured out her will and sprit until her psyche was so fractured it was no longer capable of holding itself together.
As Derrick unloc
ked her chains, she fell to the floor, unable to even hold up an arm. She had no energy left, no will to live. She’d given up wanting to live for Lincoln; surely he’d be better off without her pain and defeat coming through their bond? She hoped he couldn’t feel how she felt now, she was ashamed of how far she’s fallen, how much she’d let him down. She’d give anything to die or just to feel something other than the hollow emptiness within her.
“Don’t worry Lexia, I’m going to fix you right up,” Derrick whispered to her with a sad smile.
No, she wanted to say, No just let me die! But all he heard was a raspy croak.
“I’m going to give you something now, it will take away your pain and let you sleep so you can heal. Don’t worry, Lucy has left the state, she won’t be back for a while. I’ll look after you.”
She felt a sharp stab and then sighed as the drugs raced through her blood. She slipped into a deep sleep, holding onto an image of Lincoln in her mind, hoping he’d come visit her in her drug induced sleep.
“Lex, baby, wake up.” Lexia’s fuzzy brain struggled against the fog.
“Linc?” she whispered.
“Yes, baby, open your eyes.” But Lexia squeezed her eyes shut further, afraid if she opened them she’d be back in the room she was locked in.
“Linc,” Lexia sobbed.
“Oh, my wild cat, be strong.” Lexia couldn’t help it, she had to see if it was him. Maybe I’m finally dying and he’s come to say good bye, oh please let me die.
As she opened her eyes, her heart gave a jerk and she sobbed so hard she could barely breathe.
“Lincoln, it’s really you, but how? How are you here?”
“Shush baby, don’t worry about that, no more tears.”
“This is all in my head isn’t it, you don’t know where I am. I’m all alone.”
“Look at me, Lexia.” Dragging her eyes up, Lexia took a calming breath staring into his golden brown eyes. She thought that if she really was dying at least she could look into his eyes one last time.
Whispers of Darkness (The Deadwood Hunter Series) Page 22
