Darcy paid for the funeral expenses out of her own pocket since she had no access to their ample funds, but she felt it was the least she could do. Money had never been of monumental importance to Darcy, as long as she had food, clothes, and shelter. She did not know any of Andrew and Mary Alice’s friends and acquaintances, so she posted a notice in the newspaper that since there was no remaining adult family, they would not be receiving guests at 32 Monticello Street, but respects could be paid graveside at Our Lady of Holiness cemetery on Friday at ten o’clock in the morning.
The children were beside themselves with grief, and having had no experience with children, Darcy was at a loss as to how to comfort them, especially since she was practically a total stranger to them. All she could do was grieve with them and let them know she had loved their parents, too.
Loved? Strange, that is a word I have not used or even thought of for years. But I truly did love Mary Alice. She was like a ray of sunshine in my cave of loneliness.
Two days after the burial, they contacted the family’s attorney, Mr. Jacob Jackson, for an appointment. When Cole and Darcy met with Mr. Jackson, he eyed Cole suspiciously, looking purposefully at Darcy’s widow’s weeds.
“Hello, Mrs. Higgins. And you, sir, are…?”
“Mr. Cole Evans. He is a good friend of mine who is helping me through this very difficult time,” Darcy piped up.
The monocled barrister cocked one eyebrow and continued frowning. Then he cleared his throat and told them, “The couple’s Will did specify their express wishes regarding all the matters you are facing. Ample funds exist to care for the children until adulthood and beyond if appropriately managed. I am the executor of the estate, so I will be making any and all distributions on the Higgins’ behalf. As for where the children will live and who will raise them, there are relatives in South Carolina. I have already wired them requesting they come at once to collect the children. In the meantime, I suppose they are fine staying at the house with the servants. Although it is damaged, the house is livable, am I correct?”
“Yes, yes it is, but I would feel better if they would come and stay with me. My house suffered much less damage than theirs, and I have more than enough room. Although I am not a blood relative, they are welcome to anything I have, although I know nothing can lessen their loss.”
“Well, that will be a matter for you to take up with the children. The two eldest will return to boarding school soon, so it should only be the two younger ones, Matilda and Timothy. It is very kind and generous of you to open your doors to these children. Do not be surprised or offended, however, if they choose not to come. They have been through a terrible shock and may possibly feel the need to remain in familiar surroundings. Perhaps you could stay with them until the custodial relatives arrive?”
“Why, yes, I could do that! It would only be for a short while. Yes, that is a fine idea. That way I can offer them adult supervision without uprooting them from their home. Thank you for suggesting that, Mr. Jackson.” Darcy was brightening more and more by the end of the conversation.
“Uh, before we go, Mr. Jackson, there is the matter of funeral expenses which the Widow Higgins forfeited from the meager inheritance from her late husband. She is entitled to reimbursement from the estate for her costs.”
“Oh, Cole, that is really not neces…”
Her words were cut off by the attorney. “Yes I wholeheartedly agree with Mr. Evans. You are definitely due compensation for your expenditures. Leave the amount due you with my secretary and a check will be forthcoming, Mrs. Higgins. Again, thank you for your assistance in these matters. Good day.” Mr. Jackson saw them out and firmly closed the door behind them.
“Oh, Cole, why did you have to mention the funeral expenses? I really didn’t mind. It was not that much money out of my ‘meager inheritance’.” She couldn’t help snickering behind a gloved hand.
“Well, your financial status is no one’s business, including mine, but there is no reason for you to pay for something that is not your obligation. I daresay their parents left those children considerably more than Edgar left you. Besides, I told you again and again, I am here to watch over you whether you think you need it or not.” Though he was gently scolding her, Darcy returned a warm smile.
“Thank you, Cole. Now I need to get home and pack!” It is nice to have someone to watch over me, but I should not get used to it. He could disappear tomorrow.
On their way home, they stopped to inform the Higgins children that she would be staying with them as a courtesy to their parents, until their guardians arrived. The announcement was met with frowns from the two boys, a scowl from seventeen-year-old Hillary, and sobs from little Mattie. Darcy could hear the older girl mutter as she turned and tromped up the stairs. “What do I care, I’m not going to be here after tomorrow.”
Later that day Darcy returned to the children’s home with two valises brought in by Alfred, her butler.
“I am not trying to move in on you or be a surrogate parent, I am just here as an adult who cares about you and cared very deeply about your parents, especially your mother. I promise I am not here to barge in where I am not wanted.”
“Then you should go home now, because you are not wanted,” Kurt told her stonily.
His words stung, but Darcy had been forewarned. “I couldn’t bear to think of all of you here alone.”
“We are not alone! We have each other. Kurt and I are perfectly capable of taking care of our sister and brother. We can handle whatever comes up, and we have the servants. We don’t even know you!”
“I know, and I wish it were different. I would like to have known you better, but unfortunately my late husband did not let me get acquainted with your family.” She hung her head, tears stinging her eyes as the words rekindled her pain.
Without raising her head to look at the children, she continued in a low voice. “Believe me, I know what it means to be alone and lonely, and have no one to turn to.” Raising her gaze to face them, she continued, “Just consider me a piece of furniture, if you want, but I felt I should be here because I think your mother would have wanted it. She would not want her ‘angels’ as she called you, to be alone. When do you plan to go back to school, Kurt?” Hillary had refused to even look at Darcy.
“I am leaving at the end of the week.” Kurt spoke up. “We are not in classes right now. Most of the other students have gone home for summer holiday. If Mother and Father hadn’t been planning to sail for Europe next week, we would have been here with them. Things might have been different if we were here.” He hung his head, and Darcy could see how at eighteen Kurt was struggling with being both a boy and a man. The child that was still in him wanted to sob and be comforted at this injustice, and the man in him battled to remain strong and stoic for the sake of his siblings.
“You can’t blame yourself. There is nothing you could have done to change a thing. What has happened has happened, and we can’t change it. We just have to go on in spite of it. Your parents would be so proud of you right now, Kurt. You are really being strong for the other children.”
Six-year-old Mattie hung behind as the other three scattered to other areas of the house. She looked at Darcy for a long time, and Darcy tenderly returned her prolonged gaze. Then, to Darcy’s amazement, Mattie tentatively walked up to Darcy and after a brief hesitation, she unexpectedly flung her arms around Darcy’s waist, giving her a big hug. Tears were running down both their faces when they drew back to look at each other.
“I am glad you are here. I miss Mommy’s hugs, and she would always read me a bedtime story. Can you do that? What should I call you? Aunt Darcy or something else?”
“Aunt Darcy would be just fine. Thank you Mattie for making me feel so welcome. Your mother did the exact same thing for me recently. You remind me so much of her.” Then they hugged again, as both of them wept. “I will read you as many stories as you want.”
Playing mother, or custodial aunt, or whatever the label was for her role, kept
Darcy very busy for the next two weeks. She saw Kurt and Hillary off to school, contacted carpenters and repairmen to replace the windows and shingles and repair what other damage there was to both houses. She was temporarily mistress of two households, although Eva stepped up to take charge of Darcy’s home as though it was her own.
Darcy found herself growing quite fond of little Mattie, who was in essence a miniature Mary Alice, and even Timmy warmed up to her a little as the days passed. He remained stoic during the daytime, but she could hear him weeping in his bed at night. Almost every night Mattie would awake from nightmares and come crawl in bed with Darcy, then they would cuddle and fall back to sleep.
“Mattie, Mattie!” The two females awakened to Timmy’s screams one night.
“Tim, what is it. We are in here,” Darcy called as she scrambled out of bed, grabbing her robe and slipping her feet into her slippers. As she got to the doorway of her room, she ran smack into Timmy who came barreling across the threshold. “What is it? What’s wrong?” Darcy grabbed his shoulders, making him look at her. “Tim, please tell me what has you so upset.”
“I…I had a bad dream, and I went to Mattie’s room, but she wasn’t there. I thought…I thought I was all alone in this big house. It scared me…for just a minute.” He tried to cover up his fear with fake bravado while swiping away his tears.
“Well, since we are all awake, how about some milk and cookies? I don’t know of anything that delicious cookies and nice cold milk can’t fix. Last one down to the kitchen has to wash the dishes!” Like a young girl, Darcy took off running down the stairs. She looked back over her shoulder to see the two youngsters smiling and following her as fast as their little legs would carry them. After their midnight snack, Darcy had another suggestion. “You know what? I could really use another person in bed with me. I like having Mattie on one side, but then the other side feels so bare. Would you mind sleeping with us just this one night, Tim? I don’t think I could go back to sleep unless you do.”
“Well…” He looked at her suspiciously. “If it will help you get to sleep, I guess so, just this once.”
Smiling she headed back to bed with her two young charges, one under each arm. Soon they were all situated in the big comfortable bed, one on each side of her, and she told them a quick story before blowing out the lamp. Soon their steady, deep breathing indicated the children slept, but Darcy lay awake relishing the warmth of their small bodies against hers. Having slept alone for so long, the unfamiliar warmth of another human being was strangely comforting and desirable. How am I going to sleep alone again when they leave me? The thought stung her heart.
With her arranged marriage to Edgar, any possibility of someday having a family had vanished like a puff of smoke. He was not the fatherly type and had even told her if she were to become pregnant, she would have to terminate it. He would not allow her body to be ruined by the changes of pregnancy or share her with a yowling brat. She did all in her power to avoid facing that dilemma. Thinking back now, she revolted at how completely he had controlled her. Thank God, Edgar is dead! Someone did me a huge favor.
Looking at the children sleeping peacefully beside her, she could see why Mary Alice had dubbed them her ‘angels’. Perhaps it was not too late. Perhaps she could still be a mother one day and enjoy this experience firsthand.
Who am I kidding? Who could I trust to share my life and my bed, and to sire my children? There was Cole. No! Men could not be trusted and were always flitting from one woman to the next, never caring about anything except their own selfish whims. Men like Cole don’t become fathers.
The next day the South Carolina relatives, Mary Alice’s sister June, and her husband, Frank Thompson arrived to acquire their niece and nephew.
“Hello! I am delighted to meet you. I am Darcy Higgins, Andrew’s brother’s widow.”
“Hello, Mrs. Higgins,” June told her stiffly.
“I am all that is left of family here except for the children, so I came to stay with them while we waited for you. I live just down the street, but at this crucial time, I felt it best to keep them in familiar surroundings with their own things.”
“How kind of you, I am sure”—June sniffed, dabbing at her moist eyes with a crumpled handkerchief—“my sister and her husband would have appreciated it. Where are the children now?”
“Timmy, Mattie, your aunt and uncle are here.” Darcy called loudly toward the stairs. Turning back to face June, she continued, “I have to tell you I have become very attached to them, and the thought of never seeing them again is breaking my heart. Little Mattie is a smaller version of Mary Alice which has endeared her to me all the more. Timmy is trying so hard to be a man through it all, but he does cry himself to sleep most nights. I have no children, so I am at a disadvantage in such matters, but I did the best I could.”
“I am sure you did, Mrs. Higgins,” Frank Thompson told her somewhat gruffly. “We are going to stay over a few days to get a little bit better acquainted with the children and rest up before the long trip back home.” The household staff came and collected the Thompsons’ luggage and showed them to the guest room where the roof had been patched, and the bedding dried out.
The thought of only having the children for a few more days was like a machete to Darcy’s heart. Caring creates a curse all its own. Getting attached means suffering when that attachment is severed. But…then the tender memories from the attachment would be forfeited as well. Is this a price I am willing to pay? Could I give my heart to Cole and trust him with it for safekeeping?
All too soon, it was time to bid farewell to the Higgins children, and their aunt and uncle. She had informed them of Mr. Jackson, the attorney who was handling the financial affairs, and they had visited him prior to their departure. Darcy also gave them all the contact information for Hillary and Kurt. The past few days had been a bustle of activity: packing dolls and dresses, books and bonnets, shoes and slingshots. Now their trunks were all loaded into the wagon to take to the dock and be loaded onto the ship to take them upriver to Vicksburg. From there they would board a train for the remaining journey to Charleston.
Her eyes stinging with unspent tears, Darcy was able to manage the many hugs, kisses, ‘I love yous’ and ‘I’ll miss yous’ of their private goodbye. Darcy did even manage to force a smile through trembling lips as she waved her last goodbye to the precious children who had wheedled their way into her heart over the past ten days.
She declined to go to the dock with them, preferring the privacy of their home for the anguished farewells, besides it was raining and blustery out today. Once the door closed behind her, she slumped to the floor in a mound of black satin and lace and wept unabashedly. What has gotten into me? I am nothing but a big bawl baby these days!
That night, September 1, 1879, an even more vicious hurricane than the last one pounded the area with tremendous winds, too strong for a man to stand up without being knocked down. This time the brunt of the storm hit north and west of them, but they still felt the effects.
Darcy and Eva made pallets on the hallway floor where there were no windows to spew shattered glass on them. They huddled together, gripping the covers and listening to the howling wind and the rain pelting what remained of the windows. Many repairs had not been finished from the last storm. There had been too much work and too few skilled workers to complete it all. Now there would be an even longer wait to get work done. The city was sadly lacking in carpenters, bricklayers, and other construction workers, especially when the need was so great.
Over the next few days, according to people travelling in and out of New Orleans, the residents of the city heard this storm hit Abbeville, just a few miles west of New Orleans. Assessments of the damage found bridges washed away and a tree had fallen on another Catholic church, smashing the steeple and a good portion of the roof.
“Oh dear! Look at that.” Darcy pointed out to Eva that many of the trees whose foliage had been spared during the last storm now stood like freakish skel
etons made of bare branches. The Lake Charles Echo reported the gruesome news of the effects of the horrible storm.
The steamer Daniel Boone, buffeted about by winds and waves, sank and took six sailors to their watery graves. Many more cattle and some mules were drowned and unfortunately, a seven-year-old girl lost her life. From Lafayette to New Iberia, the sugar cane, fruit, cotton, and rice crop damage was appalling.
According to the newspaper, Cameron Parish suffered tremendous damage, and the church and school in Broussardville were both moved several feet off their foundations. Some old and burned-out buildings were flattened and many more roofs blown away. The newspaper stated that nothing in the storm’s path escaped damage. These past ten days in late summer 1879 became a memorable period of devastation, unlike anything its residents had ever seen.
All previous clean up and repair efforts were obliterated by this latest storm. Once it was over, the hardy citizens began clean-up and restoration anew. New Orleans had been spared the worst of the storm, only suffering from moderately high winds and of course, a barrage of rainfall which flooded streets and a surge of water overflowed the waterfront.
When Cole showed up the day after the hurricane, it was not just to check on her safety and well-being. The look on his face told Darcy he had something important and unpleasant on his mind. Here it comes! He’s coming to tell me he is leaving and won’t be back.
“Darcy, I hate to tell you this, but I have come to tell you I am leaving in the morning. You may or may not know”—he grinned sheepishly—“but I have not been able to concentrate on my gambling since I have been here. I have only had one big win, but I have been spending plenty, so it is time to replenish the coffer. I am not sure how long I will be gone, but I swear to you on all that is sacred, I will return to you.
“I want you to use the time while I am away to decide whether you can ever care for me enough to allow us a future together. Being so close in proximity, yet having to keep my distance is driving me insane. I want to be within arms’ length of you, not across town. I have an all-consuming want and need for you that is more intense than anything I have ever felt, but I have apparently not been very successful in convincing you to return my feelings.
A Gentleman's Game Page 11
