by Conn, Claudy
“You know, Dylan, there was a time when I would have been thrilled to have you by her side. Now, not so much. She doesn’t need you. She’s done fine on her own, without you. Besides, you have a habit of leaving when she needs you the most. Why should I expect now to be any different?”
“Tammy, for what it’s worth, I—”
“Save your apologies, Dylan. I’m not the one you need to focus them on. God knows, you’ll need them.”
Dylan nodded at her statement, knowing damn well he’d need roughly two bafrillion of the bitches before Abbie would begin to forgive him.
Tammy’s voice was calmer when she asked, “How long has she been back with the doctors?”
Dylan glanced at his watch, “About ten minutes or so, not long. The nurse said she’d let me know as soon as they had an update.”
“Thanks.” Tammy walked over to the coffee machine, dropping her quarters in the slot, then quickly making her selection. “It’s going to be a long night. You should take off and be with your mom.”
“My mom is on her way. I tried to tell her she didn’t have to come, but you know how she is. She’s worried about Abbs.” Dylan dropped into the closest seat he could find. This felt like the longest, shittiest day of his life.
Jason was the next to arrive at the hospital. Tammy ran to him, wrapping him in the tightest hug she could. Tears streamed from her eyes. “Oh, Jason. I’m so glad you’re here, sweetie.”
Dylan felt a pang in his chest as the scene before him played out. Her greeting for Jason was what he had hoped for, expected. That’s the type of greeting he had always gotten from Tammy, not the one she’d given him.
“She’ll be okay, hon,” Jason reassured her.
The doors to the restricted area opened. A nurse slowly approached the group with a clipboard in her hand. “Are you Miss Johnson’s family?”
“I’m her mom.” Tammy stood. Jason and Dylan flanked her sides.
“Abagail’s been throwing up since she got here. Can anyone tell me what she had to eat or drink today?”
“She had a leftover turkey sandwich for dinner,” Jason offered.
Tammy gasped, “Please tell me she’s not still eating the turkey she made for Thanksgiving?”
“Probably.” Jason shrugged.
The nurse jotted a few notes down on her clipboard. “Is there anything else that you know of?”
“I picked her up around two thirty. She had the sandwich, an orange, and a bottle of green tea.”
“That gives us something to work with. I’ll let you know when I have any other updates.”
Dylan took a seat while Tammy and Jason carried on a conversation next to the coffee machine. The icy reception left him at a loss and a little out of his game. It’s not like he was a complete stranger, he’d just been gone for a while. Off serving his country and stuff.
Thoughts of his reason for being home filled Dylan’s mind. The guilt of not being there for his mom and dad weighed heavily on his shoulders.
Dylan’s mom, Linda, entered the waiting room, offering a quiet hug to Tammy and Jason before seating herself next to her son. She nodded and held his hand, not saying a word.
Dylan offered a tiny smile in return. It felt good to be surrounded again by people he knew, but at the same time, not so good. He thought about the list of family and friends he hadn’t seen in years. Would they be as frigid to him as Tammy had been?
There was nothing he could do if that was the path they chose. It took Dylan a few years to grasp the idea that it was his life to live. The opinions of others were simply that and held no bearing on his life.
Abbie’s face flashed in his mind again. Her creamy alabaster skin, soft upturned lips, and tiny pert nose were nearly lost to the depth of her sparkling eyes. He wondered what she’d been up to as the years passed. The perfect people to answer those questions stood not far from him, engrossed in a heated debate. The more he thought about it, the more he knew he’d get no answers from either one of them.
Dylan wanted to know if life had been good to Abbie. Was she happy? Was she involved in a serious relationship now?
A swift kick in the crotch would have been more pleasant than thinking of her as married or being involved with someone. Dylan knew he had no rights to expect anything from her. After all, he was the one who left and seemingly never looked back.
Leaving Abbie broke his heart. To the point of distraction. Her image constantly filled his mind. Her voice haunted his ears. He broke down several times and dialed her number, only to quickly hang up when someone answered. He was surprised his testicles didn’t shrivel up and disappear when it came to owning up to his mistakes with her.
When Dylan found himself jonesing for information all things Abbie, he did what any immature eighteen-year-old would do. He bugged the daylights out of his mom with each and every call. How was she doing? Did she miss him? He had to know how she was doing. God bless her for indulging his stalker ways for the first few months. But as time went on, his mom was less informative when it came to his Abbie fixes. Finally telling him to call Abbie for himself if he wanted anymore news on her. If he remembered correctly, she may have thrown around the phrase—glutton for punishment.
A volley of hisses from Tammy caught his attention. He looked up just in time to catch Jason’s very next statement.
“No, he has no idea.” WTF? Dylan’s eyes widened at the statement. He took a deep calming breath when he heard Jason say, “Yeah, I’m positive. I didn’t tell him, and I know Abbie didn’t.”
What exactly weren’t they telling him?
Dylan looked to his mom for an answer.
Linda kept right on reading her book, acting as if she hadn’t heard a word.
Chapter Five
A slow rhythmic beep filled Abbie’s ears. Is that my alarm? Abbie wondered.
Her eyelids were heavy, refusing to open. She felt a warm hand wrapped around hers, squeezing gently.
“Abbie, sweetie, can you wake up?”
How odd, is that my mom? Why is she at my house? Abbie fought to open her eyes once again, but couldn’t. She tried to sit up, but decided her mom would have to wait. She was just too tired to wake up.
“Shhh. It’s okay, sweetie. Let the medicine do its job. I’ll be right here—”
The darkness pulled her under, again.
When Abbie finally came to, her eyes opened slowly. A warm, calloused hand wrapped tightly around hers. Good God, her tongue felt like sandpaper. She tried to speak, but no words were forthcoming. Had she been eating dirt?
Turning her head to the side, an unfamiliar room filled her view. The room started to spin as she tried to sit up to get a better view of her surroundings. A breathy grunt escaped her lips as she lowered herself slowly back onto the bed.
“Abbs, you finally waking up?”
OMG. Dylan? What strange land am I in? Am I hallucinating? Lifting her arm a tiny bit, she saw the wires of the IV taped to her hand. That’s when she remembered what went down; pulling up to Parker’s, seeing Dylan for the first time in years, puking all over Jason. Even with all of those uncomfortable memories, the one memory that left her the most confused was the bumpy ride in Dylan’s car to the hospital, him holding her hand the whole way.
“Are you thirsty? Do you need a drink?”
Ahhh. His voice was music to her ears. As much as she wanted to tell him to take a hike, she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Some small part of her longed for him. Seeing him again only reminded her of the love she once had for him, that she’d never really let go of.
She shook her head gently, indicating a sip of water would be pure heaven.
Dylan slowly lifted the Styrofoam cup up, aligning the straw perfectly with her lips. “There you go, hon. Easy at first until you can see if your stomach can hold it down.”
Abbie took a tiny sip, followed by another. “Ohh, that’s nice.”
“Do you want a little more?”
“Yes, please.” Abbie took a bigger dr
ink, relishing the feeling of the ice cold water cooling her mouth, her throat not remembering the last time water tasted so damn good.
“Better?” Dylan placed the cup on the tray and pulled his chair closer to the bed. “How are you feeling?”
“Like I was flattened by a herd of cattle.”
“That good?” Sarcasm was always one of Dylan’s strengths.
“Pretty much. I’m sore, my head is foggy, and I feel like I have fuzzy slippers on my teeth. Quite possibly my tongue as well.”
“Sounds about right for a girl who’s been as sick as you have.” Dylan claimed her hand, squeezing gently.
“Where’s my mom? Jason?” Of all the people they left her alone with, it had to be Dylan? They couldn’t have had someone else come sit with her? Had they gone mad?
“Jason left a little bit ago, said he didn’t have the luxury of lounging around all day, unlike his partner who was relaxing in bed. Your mom left late last night. She said something about needing to pick up Emmie, and left in a hurry, with very specific instructions for me to text her when you woke up. My mom was here, too, but she headed home to catch a few hours of sleep.”
Abbie’s heart skipped a beat when he mentioned Emmie. Her mom didn’t say anything, did she? Did Jason? She’d kill them if they did.
“Who’s Emmie?”
Oh crap, oh crap! Now what? “Uhh, she’s my dog, why?” Way to go Einstein! You just called your daughter your dog. That alone is all kinds of messed up and will be sure to earn you parent of the mother freaking year award. What’s next? You going to have her bark and play fetch? Abbie fought with her conscience. One voice screamed, now was not the time. But she swore to her family, her friends…the first chance she had, she’d tell him about Emmie.
Abbie took a deep breath. She’d been waiting for the chance to talk to him for six long years. There was a lot she needed to tell him. The voice inside her head begged Abbie to tell him, just be done with it. Be honest with the man. You need to tell him.
She opened her mouth, then snapped it shut as dread settled in her belly. Maybe I’ll wait another day or two. At least until I’m out of the hospital.
“Your mom said she’s been sick? What’s wrong with her?”
“She’s been running a fever and coughing. The doctor thinks it might be the flu.”
“You mean vet, right?”
“Yeah, sorry. Must be the meds.” Nice going. I am such a spazz.
“Wow, I didn’t know dogs could get the flu.” Dylan shrugged.
Okay, time to change the subject before he asked more questions she wasn’t ready to deal with. “How’s your mom holding up? How are you holding up?” Abbie quickly steered the conversation to safer ground.
“She’s doing okay. From what she told me last night, she’s oddly relieved Dad’s no longer in pain. I think she’s trying to be strong for me.”
“The last time I saw your dad he wasn’t doing very well. He looked so much different. It was almost as if you could see the cancer eating away at him.” Abbie squeezed Dylan’s hand. “I really am sorry.”
“Thanks. I think I’m still in shock. I keep thinking I should have been here. Maybe I could have helped, somehow.”
“It’s not your fault. It really isn’t. I know your mom told you the same thing. Do us a favor and listen. Don’t torture yourself over something you had no control over.” Abbie remembered when her grandma died of cancer. She watched her battle the disease for years before the disease finally ended her pain and suffering.
“When is the funeral?” Abbie asked solemnly.
“Mom wanted to wait a few days for my aunts and uncles to make travel arrangements. So, it looks like early next week.”
“Knock knock, I hate to interrupt, but it’s time to check you out and see how you’re doing.” A young, blonde nurse filled the doorway. Abbie decided immediately, the girl was much too chipper for her own liking.
Dylan stood, stretching his legs. “I’ll go grab some coffee.”
“Thanks, sweetie, I’ll make it quick.”
When Dylan was out of earshot, Abbie found out just how chipper and chatty her nurse was.
“It’s so sweet of your husband to stay with you this whole time. You are such a lucky woman. I can’t even begin to tell you how many husbands just pop in to make a good impression.”
“Oh, he’s not my husband.” Abbie blushed at the thought. That’s right, Abbs. Almost, but no dice. You had him and couldn’t keep’m. You just weren’t good enough to keep him interested. The familiar nagging voice returned in a flash. Abbie always thought it was funny how quickly she could be reminded that when it came to Dylan, she seemed to be lacking in every way possible.
“Boyfriend?” Nurse Chatty inquired.
“Nope, not even that. Believe it or not, he’s my ex-boyfriend. We used to date. Back in high school.”
“And what about the other hottie who’s been hanging around? The cop?”
Abbie started to laugh, but quickly gave up when her side screamed in pain. “Jason? He’s my partner.”
“So you have no romantic claims to him, either?”
Abbie had to smirk at Nurse Chatty’s raised eyebrow.
“Well, we dated in sixth grade, but that’s about it.”
“Geez, honey. What’s up with you and your exes? They just can’t seem to stay away, can they? You must have done something right to keep them coming back for more.” She giggled as she checked over Abbie’s vitals.
“It’s not like that. Dylan’s home for his father’s funeral and just happened to be the lucky duck elected to drive my sick ass to the hospital. Jason and I were on a call. Before this incident, I hadn’t seen him in years.”
“I’m not sure if I’m buying it, hon. Both of those guys were a nervous wreck waiting for you to wake up. They’ve been making themselves real pains in the asses for the nurses’ station. Honestly, we’re not used to all the testosterone flying around. And let me tell you, they don’t communicate. One asks a question, five minutes later, the other one asks the same damn question. They’re driving us nuts. If they weren’t so nice to look at, we’d have given them both the boot.” Nurse Chatty winked playfully at Abbie. “The armporn on those two is to die for.”
Abbie tried to explain, but what could she say when she didn’t have the foggiest idea why Dylan was still here? As for Jason? Well, he was her best friend and partner. She expected him to be here.
Chapter Six
Not wanting to be away from Abbie long, Dylan quickly grabbed a cup of coffee to go. His pace slowed as an item in the gift shop caught his attention. Abbie would love that. His body moved on autopilot to the gift shop. The item that caught his interest was a small brown teddy bear decked out in a Navy uniform. The bear held a tiny “get well soon” balloon.
If there was one thing he remembered about Abbie, it was her love for teddy bears. It was a sure fire way to bring a smile to her face. A teddy bear, really? She’s a grown damn woman. She’s not sixteen anymore. Doubts dominated Dylan’s thoughts immediately. What if she didn’t like the not so subtle reminder of him?
What did he expect? For Abbie to see him again and swoon over him? For her to forgive him instantly and fall madly in love with him again? Hold up there, buddy, logic screamed. You’re getting way ahead of yourself, aren’t you? You want her to fall in love with you, so you can, what? Leave her again in a few weeks?
Did Dylan still want Abbie? After all these years? Truth was, he didn’t know. Something happened when he saw Abbie again for the first time. An emotion, one he hadn’t sensed in what seemed like forever, once again coursed through his veins. His blood nearly reached the boiling point when he hugged her. He thought for sure Jason would have to pry them apart because he couldn’t let go.
Dylan found himself in unfamiliar territory. Feelings were considered, by him, to be nothing more than messy obstacles of life to be kept at bay. Avoided like the mother freaking plague they were.
He’d worked damn h
ard at maintaining the player persona. If any one of the women he dated dared to bring up the love you, like you, or let’s talk about our feelings conversations, he took it as his cue to hit the road.
Watching countless friends and colleagues fail miserably in the art of marriage while enlisted was enough to steer him clear of any sort of commitment. There wasn’t a one of them that worked out. How could it when the spouse’s job required damn near constant travel for up to eighteen months at a time, with little to no contact with the one you love? It was nothing more than a recipe for disaster.
One after the other, his friends found out about unfaithful girlfriends or spouses. Worse yet, the dreaded Dear John email. Seeing his friends’ lives ripped apart time and time again made Dylan thankful for his clean break with Abbie, and his refusal to be tied down to anyone.
Now was not the time to ignore his carefully constructed rules of engagement with an old girlfriend.
When his leave was up, so was his time in Cedar Lake, and his time with Abbie. He’d sign his reenlistment papers and gladly transfer to his new duty station, wherever in the world it might be. It would be time to start the next adventure.
Before he changed his mind again, Dylan placed the bear on the counter, grabbed a pack of mints, and one other item guaranteed to make her smile if the bear wasn’t appreciated.
Fumbling through the halls and elevators, Dylan made his way back to Abbie’s room without dropping, breaking, or destroying his haul. A true holiday miracle had just occurred.
Dylan paused in the doorway when he heard hushed voices engaged in a heated conversation.
“Why didn’t you tell him, Abbie? He’s going to find out. You can’t keep this hidden from him any longer. It’s not right!”
“Don’t you think I know that? I had no idea he was back in town until we were on our way to Parker’s last night. Everything happened so quickly. What did you want me to do? Blurt it out between bouts of vomiting?”
Dylan watched quietly in the shadows as the scene unfolded before him. Jason clearly expected Abbie to tell him something important. Though he couldn’t imagine what. He’d give Abbie the time she apparently needed before questioning her about it. It was pretty obvious he wasn’t supposed to hear the conversation about him, and he was fine playing dumb, for now.
