by Conn, Claudy
“They used to be. Dad had to renew his card every year. It’s expired now.”
That wasn’t the answer she was hoping for. These plants smelled like trouble. “I thought marijuana plants were annuals. How did you get it to come back?”
“Heck if I know. The last time I looked back here, they were brown and dead. Like Mom’s garden, Dad’s plant was another one of those things I couldn’t let go of.” Grady scowled as he tried to figure out the puzzle. “Somehow, it must have re-seeded itself.”
Brittany didn’t buy it. “Or someone planted new ones. By the size of this pot, I wouldn’t think your dad had more than one plant in it. There are three young plantings in here, and each one is strategically placed to form a triangle.” She looked up into Grady’s perplexed face. “Nature doesn’t do math. It’s much more random.” Her arm waved across the patio. “And where are the dried leaves? A dead plant doesn’t get up and walk away.”
“No one comes back here but me.”
“Correction,” she stated firmly. “No one used to come back here. Now someone does.”
“They must have taken my dad’s marijuana plant.”
“And had a high time,” she smirked. Suspicious by nature, Brittany began inspecting the rest of the garden. If the culprit was anything like her stoner friends back in San Diego, three measly plants weren’t nearly enough.
“What are you doing?”
“Saving you from a felony drug possession charge.”
“You think there’s more?”
She moved aside a tender palm frond and exposed six more plantings. “I think there is a lot more. When was the last time you worked out here?”
Grady plopped down in a metal garden rocker. Red with rust, the chair moaned under his weight. “Everything is watered automatically. I don’t think I’ve been back here to do any real work since you arrived.”
Brittany discovered two more plants and announced, “We’re calling the police.”
“Why don’t we just dig them up?”
“What then? Toss them in the trash or burn them?” she shot back. “I’m sure none of the neighbors will notice. Grady, someone is using your secret garden as a pot grow. They’re rank amateurs. These plants get big and pungent. As the buds ripen, the smell can be overwhelming. There is no way they would ever get away with it. I take that back. The placement of the plants are deplorable. I doubt very many of them would grow to reach maturity.”
Grady leaned back and the rocker creaked louder. “I was having a really bad day, but it was nothing compared to this.” He rocked forward and locked his eyes on her. “You seem to know an awful lot about weed. Just how much experience do you have with Pakalolo?”
Brittany dragged an orange metal rocker up next to Grady’s and sat down. “Enough to know what Pakalolo and Maui Wowie are. Don’t worry. Most of my knowledge was gained through osmosis. I used to hang out with a few tokers of the delectable Mary Jane.”
Grady cracked a smile. “Most?”
“I’ve been clam baked a few times,” she freely admitted, “but it was nothing compared to this. You have a real problem here, Grady. I’m unfamiliar with Hawaiian law, but back home, you could only grow five plants with a card. Even if you didn’t have a card, five was only a misdemeanor. I’ve counted eleven so far. No matter how you look at it, this is a felony. You’ll be facing real time if you don’t get ahead of this. Call the cops. You didn’t plant it. You found it growing in your backyard. Let the DEA take it from here.”
“They won’t believe I didn’t have anything to do with this.”
“Why the hell would you call the cops on yourself, Grady? They might look at you funny. They might even try to get you to fess up.” They needed advice, but the last thing she wanted to do was ask Miss Fancy Pants, big time lawyer, Marissa, for it. “Larry Wright picked a fine time to up and die. We could sure use his help right about now.”
“What about that old guy staying at Lena’s?” Grady suggested.
The only old guy at the B&B was the man who came in with the dolphins. “Mr. Caprice is a lawyer?”
“I think that’s what he told me.” His face scrunched in confusion. “I don’t think that’s his name, though.”
Brittany hadn’t told Grady about Lena’s fairy tale. Teasing Warden was one thing, but letting on how much she truly believed in the myth was another. “Come on. We need to get back to Lena’s.”
• • •
GRADY WAS STILL looking at Britt funny when they found Mr. Caprice in the toolshed, caring for the baby tern. It was almost as if her newfound love didn’t believe the story about the dolphins. They settled on a compromise on the car ride over. They were going to ask for Kap’s real live help and not bring up anything mystical. Brittany agreed to Grady’s demands, but he couldn’t stop her from thinking it.
Kap sat on a stool, cooing and gently blowing the bird’s snow white feathers, as they recounted the marijuana mystery.
“I’m not sure what you expect me to do,” Kap warned. “I’ve been retired for many years and I never had a license to practice in Hawaii.”
Brittany reached across the worktable and tugged his sleeve. “We just want you there to help protect Grady’s interests. He hasn’t done anything wrong. He’s been victimized. We simply want a little backup when we call the cops.”
Kap nudged his beaked friend onto the table and stood. “There’s your first mistake. You don’t want to call the police out to your house. You’re frantic. You’re upset. We’re going to them.” Kap rubbed his forehead and paced a circular track as he considered their problem. “Give me a couple of hours to brush up on the local ordinances. Go home and find the closest DEA office. It’s probably a good idea to photograph all the new additions to your mom’s garden and print them out from your computer. It would help if you had some older photos of how the garden looked about a month ago.”
Grady frowned. “My mom used to take pictures all the time. I have a ton of those. I’ve maintained her paradise, but I haven’t documented it the way she did.” His face suddenly went slack and his eyes went wide. “Wait a minute,” Grady snapped his fingers. “I took a few pics a couple of months ago. I took them out to the cemetery and placed them on her empty grave.” He scrolled through the photos on his cell. A satisfied grin formed on his lips and he held the device up for Kap to see. “You can see the dead pot plant in the background.”
Kap studied the screen. The time stamp was approximately six weeks ago. “That will do it.” He handed Grady back his phone. “You might make a list of anyone who had access inside your home since that date.”
Brittany cut Grady an amused look and smirked. “That will probably be a long list.”
Grady opened the contact list on his phone and showed her a group.
Anger flared in her eyes. “Tapped That! I sure as hell better not be on that list!” Brittany stormed.
Grady grinned. “Not yet.” He touched the phone. “I wanted you to see that the list isn’t as long as you might think.”
Brittany scrolled through the numbers and counted seven. “Why do the Javiers think you are a hound dog? From the way they talked, I was expecting a much bigger number.”
“They’re old. Two girlfriends in less than two years are probably too many.”
She didn’t buy it. “I got the same information from Erika.”
Grady yanked his phone back. “And Erika was jealous of each and every one of them.”
Kap escorted the young couple outside. “As thrilling as this conversation is, I need to do a little research. Meet me back here when you’re done, and we’ll head down to the DEA office.” Kap clutched the door to close it, but paused. “Oh, and you might want to add Erika to that list.”
The door slammed shut and Grady and Britt stared at each other.
“No,” Brittany gasped.
“Impossible,” he agreed.
Her shoulders slumped. “Crap.”
Grady blew out a reluctant sigh. “Shit.”
<
br /> • • •
“YOU UNDERSTAND WHY I can’t go, don’t you?” Annie implored.
Marissa shoved the last of her belongings into the hard-shelled suitcase and snapped it shut. “If my kid was in trouble, I’d leave you hanging in a heartbeat.” She dragged the case off the bed and placed it next to the door. “Think back to when we were in high school. Eleanor would have never left either of us to attend a memorial service in a time of need.”
“No, but I feel guilty. Larry was like a father to me. I should be there.”
“And how would you feel if one of those kids faced arrest, and you weren’t here to help?”
Annie flashed an enticing smile and showed off two rows of pretty white teeth. “We could postpone the service in San Diego. Then you could stay and help with any legal issues which might arise from this fiasco.”
Marissa’s face filled with sympathy. “Good try, my friend, but I’m in the same boat as Mr. Kaplinger. If this occurred in California, I could help, but as it stands, my words hold no weight in Hawaii.”
Annie sat cross-legged on the bed. Her worried eyes were wide and anxious. “I’m scared.”
Her BFF climbed up next to her. “If you think it will do any good, I’ll confer with Mr. Kap and make sure he’s covered all the bases before my cab arrives. I’m sorry, girlfriend, but that’s the best I can do.”
Annie covered her face with her hands and tried to push back her growing fear. “My mind keeps envisioning the worst case scenario with Grady, Brittany, and Erika all being thrown in the slammer for growing pot. Then we’ll need a real lawyer.”
Marissa patted her knee. “If it comes to that, I’ll make a few phone calls and find you someone exceptionally good, but I seriously doubt it will.” She exited the bed and slid her toiletries inside a bag. “Brittany’s right about getting ahead of this. The kids aren’t guilty. They’ve done nothing wrong. I was talking to David earlier and he brought something to my attention you might want to consider. Whoever planted all that marijuana didn’t do it just for fun. They are going to want their crop.”
Marissa’s private detective husband was always on the lookout for anything suspicious, and this time Annie loved him for it. “Brittany said she doubted if many of the plants would have survived. They tried to be sneaky by hiding them behind other plants. In the shade. Even I know pot needs direct sunlight to grow, and I doubt the wannabe felons realize how big the plants actually get. By sheer size alone, they would have been found out.”
Marissa’s eyes bugged slightly. “I didn’t say they were smart, I just said their grove appears to be a serious attempt at making a semi-fast buck. How long does it take for a marijuana plant to mature anyway?”
Annie giggled. “Sista, you were standing right next to me the last time I smoked a joint. That is the extent of my knowledge, but if you still have Stoner Sam’s number, I’m sure he has all the answers.”
Marissa eased her body back on the bed and reminisced, “Stoner Sam. That’s a blast from the past. I wonder if that dude is still alive.”
“I wonder if he graduated high school,” Annie added.
“Or how many years are left on his sentence.”
Annie was surprised how fast their exchange degenerated from serious to practically joyful. “Watch, we’ll Google him and find out he’s more successful than both of us put together.”
“I have to admit it,” Marissa’s eyes sparkled with amusement, “that boy could turn a buck.”
“And roll a doobie.”
Marissa dabbed the corner of her eye. “This conversation is highly inappropriate. I’m grieving. I shouldn’t be laughing.” She waved a warning finger under Annie’s nose. “And my kids are never to hear about our brush with illicit drugs.”
“I’m right there with you,” Annie agreed. “I have two kids right down the hall who I want to remain blissfully unaware.”
A light tap at the door interrupted their walk down memory lane. Erika stuck her head inside. “Sorry, Mom, it’s too late for that.” Her smiling face slipped back through the frame and the door snapped shut.
“Did you hear that?” Annie gasped with excitement.
“Yeah, I guess we weren’t exactly quiet. The cat’s out of the bag.” Marissa cautioned Annie again. “For you, not me. There is still a chance I can hide my lawless past from my babies.”
Annie waved her hand frantically in the air. “Not about the weed. Erika just called me Mom!”
12
BRITTANY GRIPPED GRADY’S hand as they waited in the hall of the Honolulu DEA office. The hard metal bench was bolted to the floor, and the scars of handcuffs being scraped against the arms had her wondering if they were about to sign their own arrest warrant.
Grady’s sweaty palm indicated he was equally nervous.
Mr. Caprice hovered over them. He held a manila folder under his arm. Brittany didn’t have any idea what the folder contained, but the image he presented was of an astute professional. Knowing their savior was with them brought her immense comfort.
A door opened a few feet away and a middle-aged Asian woman motioned for them to join her. When they drew close, she extended her hand. “Hello. I’m Agent Tam. Thank you for coming in today.”
Once they were seated in her office, Agent Tam said, “I understand you wish to report a marijuana grow.”
Brittany, Grady, and Mr. Kaplinger all raced to explain. They talked over each other and not a single word could be understood.
Agent Tam raised her hand. “One at a time, please.” She reached out and patted her battered wooden desk. “Let’s start with the owner of the property. Simply tell me what you know, Mr. Barlow.”
Grady’s gaze shifted to Kap, who nodded for him to tell all. Grady drew in a deep breath and replied, “It’s not much. I was attending a funeral service for a good friend. It brought up memories about my parents’ death. I couldn’t handle it, so I left.” He gave Brittany’s hand a squeeze. “Brittany saw me leave and followed. When I got home, I went out back to the garden my mom created and tried to calm down. That’s when I noticed my dad’s dead pot plant was alive and had sprouted a couple of suckers.”
Mr. Kaplinger jumped in and interjected, “Grady’s father had a medicinal marijuana card. Since the state of Hawaii doesn’t have any pot shops, growing for personal use is allowed.”
Agent Tam cocked her head. “I’m aware of Hawaiian law, but thank you for refreshing my memory, Mr. Kaplinger.” She gestured for Grady to continue.
“Just about that time, Brittany showed up. When I didn’t answer the front door, she walked around back to find me. She’s the landscaper at Lena’s B&B in Waianae. When I showed her the plant, she didn’t think it sprouted on its own and began looking around the garden. Within minutes, she found eleven plants. Since then, we have found around twenty more. I did not plant them. I don’t have any idea where they came from. I didn’t even smoke any of my dad’s, one and only, plant.”
Agent Tam shifted her focus to Brittany. “Is there anything you’d like to add to Mr. Barlow’s story?”
Story? Agent Tam didn’t believe them. Erika wasn’t going to have to share her room tonight. She and Grady were going to jail. Britt rolled her shoulders to release the building tension and to help quell her growing anxiety. “Not about the actual events which led to our discovery, but I do have some opinions I’d like to share.”
The DEA agent gave Brittany the floor.
Brittany let go of Grady’s hand and propped her arms on Agent Tam’s desk. “I’ve never grown pot myself, but I have a good working knowledge of what they would need. Whoever planted the stuff in Grady’s yard didn’t have a clue what they were doing. The only plants that have a chance of surviving are the ones in his dad’s pot. Even it’s too small to support all three. One would probably thrive and drink up the majority of the soil’s nutrients. The others would shrivel up and die.”
Agent Tam cocked her head. “And what did you plan on doing with the surviving plant, Miss Su
therland?”
Brittany narrowed her eyes and studied Agent Tam’s face. “Stop messing with me.”
Mr. Caprice placed a calming hand on Brittany’s shoulder.
Britt took a breath and attempted to regain whatever composure she had left. “I plan on you and a bushel of cops raining down on Grady’s property and confiscating every last one of the offending plants. There won’t be any survivors, so your question has no relevance.”
Agent Tam picked up a pencil. Tapping its eraser on her desk, she looked at them for a hard five minutes before she spoke. “You’re wrong, Miss Sutherland. We aren’t going to pull up a single plant... just yet. If there are thirty plants in Mr. Barlow’s yard, then we need to find out who put them there.”
Mr. Kaplinger raised his hand. “We thought you might want the names of the people who had access to Grady’s home.” He pulled a sheet of paper out of the folder. “This should get you started.”
Agent Tam scratched her chin. “How do you fit in all this, Mr. Kaplinger?”
Mr. Caprice stood and walked behind the young couple he’d been called upon to protect. Placing a hand upon each of their shoulders, he said, “I was an attorney in a former life, but I’m only here for moral support and to retain appropriate counsel if this meeting happens to turn south.”
Agent Tam leaned forward. Her manner was both aggressive and defensive. “You must realize there are questions I need to ask.”
Mr. Caprice held his hands up in surrender. “Ask away. The moment they realized something was afoot, they came to me for advice. They have come to you freely and without reserve, but I give you forewarning, if I get so much as an inkling that you plan on arresting them for a crime they did not commit, I will do my utmost to protect them.”
Agent Tam eased back in her seat. “Duly noted, Mr. Kaplinger. Now, can we get on with it?”
Brittany loved how Mr. Caprice stood up to the DEA agent. It looked like she was about to simmer down and take them seriously. Brittany touched the paper. “I just want to point out, that even though we believe her to be completely innocent of any wrongdoing, we added my niece, Erika Turner, to the list. She had access to Grady’s backyard, but she’s not responsible.”
