Past Forward- A Serial Novel: Volume 6

by Chautona Havig

  “Mom!”

  “Marianne!”

  The Tesdall men stared at Marianne in disbelief. Chad’s eyes slid toward Willow, nervousness etched in every uncomfortable twitch of his hands. She snickered. He stared. Christopher chuckled. Chad glared. Willow laughed. Marianne cried—between her own gales of laughter. Chad crossed his hands over his chest and shook his head. “What’s so funny?”

  “I don’t know!” Willow laughed again. “But I’m glad to see we can all add. I keep waiting for someone to tell me my numbers are off.”

  Marianne nuzzled Kari’s head, her eyes closed. “I am so glad you didn’t listen to me about her. I’ve been grateful since long before she was born, but now…”

  Tears flowed. The women clung to each other. Kari joined them with her own wails of protest at being squished. In the midst of the emote-fest, Chad and Christopher glanced at one another and said in unison. “Hormones.”

  Somehow, they lived.

  Willow groaned as she descended the stairs the next morning. The room looked festive enough for a Christmas party. The tree stood ready to decorate. The mantel dripped with lights and greenery. Everything came together as a lovely tableau—just as it had when they’d gone to bed the previous night. Everything except the coffee table. There, a crystal candle centerpiece screamed “nightmare” to her. Marianne must have set it up after they left the room or perhaps she’d just finished. Either way, Willow expected a miserable morning once the boys awoke.

  As if their cue, the odd harmony of Liam and Lucas’ united, “Maaaammmmaaaa… up! Maaaaammaaaa… up!” drifted down to her.

  Chad stepped from their room. “I’ll get ‘em.”

  “Do they have to wake up now? Is it really so bad to drug ‘em?”

  He took a detour and jogged down the stairs. “Wha—oh no. Ugh.”

  “It’s not just me? This is going to be the nightmare it seems like?”

  “It’ll be worse than we can imagine. I’ll talk to her.” Chad started for the basement. “I bet she’s down there putting away the boxes.”

  “Don’t, Chad. It’s her house. We’ll just have to stay with them at all times.”

  “But—”

  “Would you like someone to come into our house and tell us to remove the candles or the animals or whatever is important to us?”

  “But we did remove them—the candles.” Chad glanced up as the boys’ cries grew louder. “We took all that out when Aggie brought the children.”

  “And we chose to do that. You would have resented it if Aggie had insisted.” Willow shook her head. “We can’t do that to her. She’s probably waited for your whole lives for the chance to decorate without worrying about a ball flying through the room. I just hate to take that away from her.”

  Chad took a couple steps toward the stairs. “The first time she sees one of us dive to protect it, she’ll lose it anyway...”

  Guests filled the chairs at the mission. From Becca’s grandmother’s friends and regular attendees of the mission church to a few random homeless regulars, the room became packed within minutes of time to start. A few stood at the back of the building. Others stood along the aisles once the chairs filled.

  A man and woman sat beside Ida Jacobs and beside them, two other elderly women, both of whom Ida introduced as her sisters. “And this is Becca’s mother, Denise, and her father—my son—Robert.”

  Chad tried to shake hands, but juggling Kari in one arm and using the others to keep the boys corralled made it difficult. “Becca is amazing. We’re happy to have her on the farm.”

  “I’m amazed that she’s doing something like that and that Joshua is—” Robert Jacobs cleared his throat and choked out, “—someone she is interested in.”

  “She loves him and the way Josh cherishes her…”

  Robert nodded. “I’ve seen it. I’m surprised, of course.”

  Ida picked up Liam and squeezed him. “I’m looking forward to retirement myself. With Becca working on the farm and Josh busy with his interior decorating, I’ll have lots of time to do the things I never get to do now.” Under her breath, Chad heard her hiss, “Robby, do not ruin this day for her.”

  “Mom…”

  “I mean it, Robert Jacobs.” Ida’s voice rose just a smidge. “She’s endured enough censure for the fiasco with Phil.”

  “If she hadn’t rushed—”

  “Well, no one can call this a rush,” Chad interjected. “She’s known him for years now.” Josh and his groomsmen appeared. “Looks like it’s about to start.”

  A look on Josh’s face sent Chad’s eyes roaming over the room in search of what could have alarmed the man. The back doors remained closed. No one seemed in distress. As far as he could see, nothing was wrong, but another glance at Josh troubled him.

  He coughed. Josh’s eyes flew across the room. After the slightest hesitation, Josh crossed the front and murmured, “He’s here.”

  “Who?”

  Josh cleared his throat, his discomfort visible. “Dave—my ex.”

  “Oh boy. He wouldn’t make a scene?” Chad’s eyes followed Josh’s to a tall man in the corner.

  “Not intentionally. I think this hurts him though. I don’t want to make Becca and her family uncomfortable, but I don’t want to—” The music changed, signaling the beginning of the ceremony.

  Chad nudged Josh. “I’ll go stand with him. Just enjoy this day. You made this choice, even if Dave doesn’t understand it. It’s your choice.”

  “Thanks.”

  Chad led Lucas to Cheri and whispered, “Keep him for me?”

  “Sure, but—”

  Without waiting to explain, Chad rushed down the aisle and to the corner where Dave stood, arms folded across his chest. “Hi. I’m Chad—friend of Josh’s.”

  Dave nodded. “He wants me to go.” The man started to turn away.

  “No… he just doesn’t want you hurt.”

  “Kind of late for that.” A sigh escaped. “I guess that’s not fair.”

  “No, but it’s understandable.”

  “You know, I remember when I knew all of Josh’s friends.” The man’s eyes swept the room. “I don’t recognize anyone but his parents.”

  Music swelled. The doors opened and bridesmaids began strolling down the aisle. Willow brought up the rear as matron of honor, and Chad couldn’t help but point her out. “That’s my wife, Willow.”

  “I’ve heard about her. Josh said once—” Red crept up Dave’s neck. “—said he thought a lot of her.”

  “Said he would have asked her out if she wasn’t there picking out bridal fabric you mean.”

  A few “shhhs” nearly made Chad laugh. Willow’s eyes met his from across the room, a question filling them as she glanced from him to Dave and back again. Dave murmured back, “You’re getting the evil eye, aren’t you?”

  “More like the, ‘What on earth are you doing back there when you have a front row seat?’ eye.”

  A little dark-haired girl stepped into the center aisle, her dress touching the floor each time she bent over to drop a petal or two in precise movements. Twice she stepped on the hem and stumbled forward. As she neared the front, her feet and skirt conspired against her and sent her sprawling in the aisle. Willow rushed to rescue her, but a tall, dark man nearly sprang from his seat, swept her up, and deposited her at Willow’s feet with a kiss to the cheek before he backed into his seat again.

  The little girl looked up at Willow and whispered something to her. Chad glanced at Dave. “Did you hear?”

  “No, but I think she said that was her daddy.”

  Becca appeared and the congregation stood. As her pale gold gown swept the aisle, Chad couldn’t help but watch Dave. The man never took his eyes off Josh. The moment Josh took Becca’s hands, he felt Dave tense. “We can step out if you’d rather,” he whispered.

  “I need to see it. I’ll convince myself there’s still hope if I don’t.” Dave sagged. “You’d think after almost six years…”

&nbs
p; “It’d take longer than that for me to remove Willow from my heart.” A few more shushes sounded around them, but Chad sent back dagger glances, daring people to do it again.

  The traditional vows began with the call for those with “just cause” to prevent the marriage to speak. Dave shoved his hands in his pockets. The sermon began. Dave squirmed. The couple had chosen to incorporate their pasts into the ceremony—Becca with her invalid marriage to an unscrupulous man and Josh’s return from a lifestyle he hadn’t truly chosen. Each word seemed to beat Dave down further. Chad tried several times to urge the man to step outside, but he refused. “I have to stick it out—for Josh now more than me. I can’t hurt him by leaving.”

  “He’ll understand.” As he whispered, his eyes darted around him, narrowing as they met those of irritated guests. Some things are more important than you hearing every nuance of this wedding without interference. Get a grip, people.

  “That’s why I have to stay.”

  At the end of the sermon, just before Josh and Becca took their vows, Barney asked the guests to join him in prayer. He prayed that they would glorify the Lord always, that they would always look to serve one another over self, and that the Lord would bless their work and commitment to one another. A hush settled over the room as he finished.

  “Josh and Becca each, long before they met each other, committed themselves to serving the less fortunate. Even when choosing a location for their wedding and ceremony, they chose this place.” Barney’s eyes swept the room. As they rested back on the couple, he smiled. “So it came as no surprise, when they said they didn’t want to do the traditional unity candle.”

  Baskets sat on each side of the front and at his nod, Becca and Josh each picked up one and carried it to the front row. From the basket, they took a roll, tore it in half, and handed the halves to guests. Those guests they couldn’t reach received their portion from someone closer to the aisles. As they passed out the “little loaves,” Barney explained the meaning behind their actions.

  “Josh and Becca chose to share bread with their guests—the worldwide symbol of provision. Their desire is that they share all the Lord provides for them with others, just as they do with you today.”

  As Josh reached Chad and Dave, Chad felt the man beside him freeze as if ready to bolt. Josh took a roll, tore it, and handed each of them one of the halves and whispered, “Thank you.”

  The couple met at the back and nearly ran, hand in hand, to the front where Barney waited to give them their vows. Despite his intentions, the moment Barney pronounced them husband and wife, and Josh lifted Becca’s veil for their kiss, Dave shuffled his way along the back wall and slipped out the door. Chad hesitated, taking one long look at his wife and the kissing couple, and followed. At the door, he grabbed someone’s coat from the rack and covered Kari in it. He found Dave just outside the door, fighting back emotion.

  “I hope you won’t leave.”

  “Why?”

  Chad jerked his head toward the door. “He’s your friend.”

  “Was.”

  “If he wasn’t still a friend, you wouldn’t have come.”

  Cars drove past, people ambled along the sidewalk, some watching curiously and others hurrying as if being too near a mission for too long might make homelessness contagious. Murmuring grew louder until the front doors opened. A few guests slipped outside—several lighting cigarettes immediately. Dave shook his head. “Looks weird to see people smoking at a church, doesn’t it? I’m surprised they allow it.”

  “I guess.”

  Dave glanced through the doors, and Chad knew the moment he caught sight of Josh and Becca. “She’s different than I would have expected. I pictured him with a tiny little thing—doll-like.”

  “Becca’s no Amazon woman, but she’s not doll-like, that’s for sure.”

  “What does she do—career-wise, I mean.”

  Chad had to stifle the temptation to laugh. Dave would never believe it. “She—well they now—live on our farm. She takes care of the gardens, orchards, and animals and helps with things like candling and soap making.”

  “Wait—your farm? Josh on a farm? You’re kidding me. Why does Christianity always turn people into agrarian—” Dave stopped short. “None of my business.”

  “Josh doesn’t care much about the farm stuff. He’d prefer to live in an apartment in the city with access to all the fabric and trims in the world at his fingertips.”

  “But he moved to a farm.”

  “For Becca, yeah. She loves it. He loves her.” Chad winced at the pain on Dave’s face as he spoke those words. “—so he learns to deal with it.”

  “I see.” Dave turned to leave. “He never loved me like that.”

  “Dave…”

  Two steps down, the man’s eyes rose to meet Chad’s. “No, really. I didn’t understand. I really thought he was in denial. I mean, he cared about me. He did. But Josh would never have given up his comfort for me like that. Never. He tried to tell me when he left.” Dave glanced into the building once more but guests blocked any hope of a view of the newlyweds. “He really tried to make me understand that he’d never been convinced. I just thought he—”

  “He doesn’t blame you.” Chad tried once more to get Dave to come inside. “Just come meet her. You’ll understand.”

  “I understand now.” Dave made it to the bottom of the steps before he turned around and jogged back up again. “Brad?”

  Chad turned. “Chad. Change your mind?”

  “No, but I have a question.”

  “Okay…” Chad shifted squirming Kari and prayed that her diaper held until he could get inside.

  “Are you a Christian too—like Josh?”

  “Yes.”

  “But you came to talk to me.” Dave’s eyes bored into Chad’s. “Why?”

  “Because Josh was worried about you.”

  “So you’re okay with gays.”

  “With you as a person, sure.” Chad prayed he’d say the right thing if Dave pressed. The expression on Dave’s face changed and Chad prayed harder. He’d ask.

  “But not with my lifestyle.”

  “Sorry, but yeah. Not comfortable with your lifestyle and it goes against my faith.”

  “But you talked to me anyway.”

  Chad shrugged. “I don’t agree with Democrats either, but that doesn’t mean I don’t talk to them.”

  An awkward silence followed before Dave muttered, “So how do you feel about gay Democrats?”

  “Same as any Democrat. I think their politics make as much sense as I imagine they think mine does.”

  “Republican.” It came out as more of an accusation.

  “Don’t let my wife hear you say that.” Chad glanced around him in mock terror. “You’d get an earful. Willow says, ‘The difference between a Democrat and a Republican isn’t much more than two letters and a box on a ballot.’”

  Davie tried again. The antagonism hovering near his words telling more than the man probably intended. “Homophobe who talks to gays. Interesting.”

  “I’m not afraid of you. I’m not uncomfortable with you. I don’t dislike you or want you burned at the stake. I just have a faith that forbids it. That makes me uncomfortable with one of your choices in life. I’m a cop. Would you be comfortable being a cop?”

  “No way. Not my thing.”

  “So are you legal-phobic?” Chad saw Willow coming and prayed she’d either have the right thing to say or that Dave would leave before she said the wrong thing.

  Frustration filled Dave’s eyes. “You people always do that. It’s not the same thing.”

  “What’s not?” Willow reached for Kari. “She has to eat whether she wants to or not. I’m going to explode.”

  “She needs a diaper too.”

  “Got it.” Willow glanced at Dave and smiled. “Hello. I don’t recognize you. I’m Willow.”

  “This is Dave, lass. Josh’s ex.”

  “Ex what?”

  Chad chuckled at Dave�
�s bug eyes. “Ex-partner.”

  “Busi—oh.” Her eyes met Dave’s. “Are you okay?”

  “I was. Now I’m just confused. I’d better go.” He started to turn away, but paused. “Look, I don’t know if I even believe you, but if you’re real about this—everything—thanks. I don’t think it’s any of yours or anyone else’s business what I do with my private—”

  “You brought it up, man. Not me. If you hadn’t asked, would you have known?” Chad gave Willow a squeeze on her arm and prayed she’d take the baby and leave. She didn’t.

  “I don’t get it. What’s the problem?”

  “He knows I’m a Christian. He knows I disagree with his lifestyle.”

  “Why would you bring that up?”

  “I didn’t!” Chad lowered his voice. “He asked; I answered.”

  Dread filled Chad’s heart as he saw a familiar expression appear on her face. Willow turned to Dave and gave him a pointed look. “You knew when you asked what the answer would be. You knew he treated you with respect and yet you baited him.” She answered the question that formed on Dave’s lips before he could ask it. “Because I know my husband. What kind of fool do you think I am?”

  “I didn’t mean—”

  “Listen to me. Don’t condemn my husband for being honest. If you don’t want the truth, don’t ask for it.” She hesitated and her face softened a little at the chastened look on Dave’s face. Her directness evaporated it, and teasing settled in its place. “Now are you coming in with us or not? There’s some amazing food in there, and I’m starving.” Kari fussed. “As is my daughter.” The man’s face must not have given her the answer she sought, because Willow nodded and added, “If you don’t, well, it was nice to meet you. I’ll be praying for you today.”

  As she walked back into the building, Dave watched. “Is she for real?”

  “Yep.”

  “Wow.”

  Chapter 203

  Willow stepped into the enormous cafeteria and allowed herself a moment to enjoy the décor. Josh’s design, her planning, and Becca’s brilliant execution ensured that they managed to clean up after the lunch meal and decorate in just over two hours. A woman stepped into the room with the flower girl and pointed out the cake, the bridal table, and the crates. “Isn’t everything beautiful, Mayra?”