by L A Cotton
I watched them like that until Gardner dismissed the class. This time I didn't stick around for the crush to clear, I shoved my notebook into my book and joined the line, avoiding looking in their direction.
"Ana, wait up," a voice called out from behind me, as I hurried along the path to the student center.
My heart sank. It wasn't the voice I had hoped for.
"Man, you walk fast." Paul fell into step next to me, and I offered him a tight smile and kept walking. "So, Elena mentioned that you're up for all of us going out? All of us, together, totally not a date."
Awkward.
"Umm, yeah, I guess." I scooted around the huge puddle blocking the path, but Paul didn't see it. "Fuck. I'm soaked," he said, shaking off his legs.
Reluctantly, I stopped walking and turned back to him, shaking my head with laughter. Paul was drenched up to his knees, rain splatter marking his light jacket and book bag.
He finished wiping himself down and closed the gap between us. "So, the party down at Dead Man's Cove tomorrow? You'll come with m- us?"
I nodded and his whole face lit up. This is not good. Sure, Paul seemed like a nice enough guy, but my head was nearly imploding just thinking about Jackson. I didn't need to add anyone else to the mix.
Chapter 5
As I stared out of our first-floor dorm room window, I groaned. Not one hour ago, I had felt sure the party would be abandoned. The rain was hitting the glass so hard that I jumped back a couple of times in fear of it cracking. Now there were just clouds. Gray, angry clouds…and not one damn speck of rain.
“Chica, you need to be ready in five. We’re meeting the guys out front.”
Perfect... Not.
“I’m ready.”
Elena scowled as she perused my outfit. “You're not wearing that.”
I looked down at my skinny jeans and oversized sweater and shrugged. “Yeah?”
“Nah-ah. Not happening. Vamanos, over here. Ahora.” She snapped her fingers and eyed me with such vehemence that I trudged in her direction.
“No, ugh, no way, hmm maybe, ahhh...” Elena fingered through her wardrobe pulling out various shirts and pants.
Her enthusiasm should have been infectious, but I found it exhausting. Slumping onto her bed, I glanced at the window again, saying a silent prayer for rain. Where was the wettest climate known to man when you needed it?
“Sῖ, muy bueno.”
A peach-colored shirt landed in my hands, followed by black pants that looked like I would need to be sewn into them. “Go. Change. Now.” Elena grinned, and I dragged myself off her bed and headed for the bathroom, figuring it would be easier—and less painful—to just go with her flow than to argue.
As I pulled the shirt down over my head, my eyes landed on the pink jagged line on the inside of my wrist. My eyes slammed shut and I swallowed down the acid rising in my throat. The urge to wretch my heart up was overwhelming. Calm. Down, Ana. Lock it away. Tight.
“Ana, let’s go already.”
Elena smiled with approval as I exited the bathroom, but my lips strained into a tight line. Everything’s fine. You have this.
As we left the room, the little voice in my head creeped back in.
Are you sure?
~
Five minutes. That was all it took for me to understand why they called it Dead Man’s Cove. A path down to the cove didn’t exist. It was all overgrown and wild. There were the signs of a previously trodden path, but the rain had done an excellent job of disguising its tracks.
“Shit, I’d forgot how deadly this is.” Paul’s voice cut through the darkness, a rustle and another grunt chasing his words.
I stifled a laugh; the guy was clumsier than a bear in the dark.
“Dude, they don’t call it Dead Man’s Cove for nothing. If the walk down doesn’t kill you, the walk back definitely will.”
Tyson had a point. How in the hell were we supposed to get back up? I didn’t have time to consider the options as someone knocked into my back.
“Oops, sorry, Ana.”
“No worries, Tyson. Doesn’t one of you have a pocket torch or something? My phone light isn’t strong enough.” I waved my cell in front of me again, trying to identify a safer route.
“Yeah, along with my Swiss Army tool,” Paul added.
The guys laughed, and Elena jumped to my defense. “Hey, lay off, Ana, baby.” There was movement next to me. I heard the sound of lips smacking and then Elena giggled.
“Get a room you two,” I called out.
We eased our way down the treacherous path, and I gripped onto Paul’s jacket, trying to avoid skin-to-skin contact. I had already turned down his hand twice, and things were awkward enough without giving him any mixed signals.
“I hear something.” Tyson’s voice traveled on the damp air.
The ground started to level, and my eyes focused enough to make out the faint flicker of fire in the distance. “Over there.”
As we reached the bottom of the trail, the ground changed to sand and the grains seeped into the sneakers that I had refused to trade for the kitten-heeled pumps that Elena tried to talk me into wearing.
“I’m excited. Our first beach party.” My roommate grabbed my hand, and I rolled my eyes at Elena, even though she couldn’t see me. “You’re forgetting one thing, Elena. A beach party has sun.”
“Amen, chica. But college is about new experiences, right?”
She was right. I had to keep remembering that. To keep hold of that.
“Amen.” I sucked in a breath, squeezed her hand and yanking her with me, headed toward the chaos.
An hour later, I was starting to realize something; parties weren’t much fun if you were the only sober person. The second we had reached the bonfire, beers were handed out and a guy in a Fallen football jersey lined up four shots on an overturned tree trunk demanding that we drink. Paul, Tyson, and Elena obliged, and I played the designated driver card. It was a total lie—I didn't have a car and we had walked the whole way from campus, but shot guy didn't need to know that.
Now I was sitting on the sand, back resting against the very same trunk, watching everyone around me enjoying themselves—giving themselves over to the experience. Living. I envied them. Sure, some of them would be hiding secrets, but wasn’t everyone? However, they still went on living. I merely existed. Well, apart from my impromptu coffee with Jackson. I blamed his green eyes, all sincere and soulful. For just a second, they had made me want to live. But that hadn’t worked out so well. And even if I could find a way to go on living—I would never forget. Ever.
“Annna," Elena slurred. "Come dance with us?”
I shook my head at Elena, who was gliding up and down a very rigid Tyson. Paul stood next to him sipping a beer.
“Come on. It’s a party. On the beach. With music.”
My roommate was wasted, and before I could escape, she marched right up to me and planted her hands on her hips. “Savanah Parry, move tu culo now!”
I glanced around her to see Tyson and Paul watching with amused smirks on their faces. Jerks.
Releasing an exasperated breath, I jumped up off the sand and wiped myself down. “Fine. Let’s go.”
Her slack jaw showed her surprise. Hell, I had even surprised myself. But I had to do something. My efforts to go unnoticed were only making me stand out more. I needed to blend, so after maneuvering us to the alfresco dance floor, I let my body succumb to the beat. It wasn’t hard. There had been a time when I had loved dancing.
Macklemore's “Can’t Hold Us” started playing through the unidentified sound system and my body popped in rhythm to the bass. Tyson and Paul joined us and like two uptight giants, they stood guard, warning off anyone who tried to approach us. Tyson's hooded glare stayed rooted firmly on Elena as she rolled her hips to the beat of the song. Things seemed to be moving pretty fast between the two of them, but then again when you knew you knew. I didn't doubt love at first sight...I just didn't think I would ever find that again.
/>
Shoving the depressing thoughts out of my head, I continued swaying, grinding, and moving my body to the music. That was until a familiar silence descended over us and the music cut out. Whispers rippled in the air as Braiden and his friends sauntered over to the bonfire, each grabbing a beer from one of the scattered coolers. A couple of guys in matching football jerseys moved toward them and they all welcomed each other in that typical guy way. Shoulder checks, fist bumps, guy hugs—it was like watching some weird brotherhood ritual. The guy who had brought us shots when we first arrived made a beeline for Braiden. "The party just arrived." He extended his arm and balled a fist. "Dude, we thought you weren't going to make it."
Braiden pressed his fist to the smaller guy’s curled hand, giving a slight nod over the other guy’s shoulder, just as the music cut back in. Everyone came back to life like reanimated puppets. Guys started drinking again, girls continued their previously frozen dance moves—Braiden gave the nod and it was business as usual.
My body didn't start moving again, though. "Elena, I need a break. I'll be over there." I pointed to a seat carved into one of the huge trunks. It was near enough to the guys to hear their conversation, but not so near that Braiden would notice me. I hoped.
Elena shrugged, wrapping herself around Tyson. I casually approached the trunk, dropping onto it unnoticed.
"So, what took you so long?” Shot guy said to Braiden.
Braiden took a long pull on his beer and then replied, “Shit to take care of.”
“And Pierce?”
“He’s on his way.”
“Cool, man. Hey, have you seen Tammy and her friends? Hot doesn’t even cover it. Man, I had to pay to tap that.”
The guys laughed and continued chatting about the party while I discreetly watched them out of the corner of my eye, my gut telling me that something was definitely amiss.
I sat up a little straighter as I noticed Braiden clear his throat and jump up onto the trunk nearest him. "CFA, are you ready to party?"
The crowd cheered as I sat wide-eyed, watching a blond-haired god act as if he owned the town and everyone in it.
"This year is going to rock. Me and my fellow Fallen teammates..." he tilted his head in the direction of the other jersey-wearing guys "...intend on smashing our way through every team we play to make sure that we bring the championship home. Where it belongs. CFA, do you hear me?"
"HELL YEAH," the crowd erupted, startling me enough that I jumped.
"I said, CFA, do you HEAR ME?" His voice roared, echoing around the cove, reverberating off the rocks.
The rest of the team stepped forward, chanting, “Fallen, fallen, fallen,” which only incensed the crowd more, as they shouted, “Hell yeah.” Guys cheered and girls screamed. The whole thing was bordering on lunacy.
"Quiet down, quiet down." Braiden jumped down off the trunk and circled the bonfire. "Now, as we all know, freshman year is about new experiences. It's about getting wasted and getting laid..."
I almost choked as I heard a girl cry out, "Braiden fuck me."
"...CFA, class of seventeen, shit just got real. Let's paaaaaarty!"
The whole cove shook as people around me started chanting Braiden's name. Braiden seemed immune, or used to it, as he casually strolled up to a petite blonde standing to one side of the fire. He grabbed her by the butt, lifting her up, and slammed his lips to hers. The look of surprise melted off her face as she wrapped her legs around his waist and he kissed her into submission.
I couldn't look away. Even though I knew that I should, it was impossible. The guy was all kinds of creepy and so full of himself that I wondered how he fit through doorways. But he was enigmatic. A charmer. Girls watched him, a look of longing in their eyes. Guys watched him, a look of awe in theirs. It was at that precise moment that I realized Talia hadn't been wrong when she said Braiden was going to rule the academy. He already was.
Eventually, I had seen enough. Elena wasn't getting any more sober, and Paul's advances were getting harder to shrug off.
"Ana, come dance with me. Come on." Paul's hand found mine, and he tugged gently.
I shook my head, planting my feet firmly in the soft sand. "I don't think so. I’m beat. In fact, I might head back.”
Paul sighed. “You’re a hard girl to get to know, Ana Parry, but that’s okay. Cormack men don’t give up easily.” A faint smile played on his lips.
I punched his shoulder lightly. “Sure thing, big guy. Now, you guys good?” I looked from Paul to Elena and Tyson.
“Sure, we can find our way, girl scout," Tyson said.
"Ahhh, chica, stay. Dance some more. Don't leave us. Besides, I don't think you should walk back alone. Paul could-" She glanced at Paul and back at me, but I cut her off. "I'm fine. You guys stay. I'll be okay." As long as I don't fall and break my leg trying to climb back up that trail. "I want to head into town early tomorrow and explore. Really, I'll be fine. I'll text as soon as I get to the dorm."
Elena stepped out of Tyson's protective arm and wrapped her arms around me. I didn't flinch this time. Instead, I returned her hug and said goodnight.
Walking toward the trail opening, I noticed people disappearing into the forest further up the beach. Hoping they knew about a safer route back up to the road—and not just a quiet place to get it on—I followed them.
The trail started winding up the cliff, my feet sinking into the ground, still damp and slippery from the day's rain. It was less overgrown, but I still had to step over the occasional tree root. I could just make out the edge of the cliff up in front, the glow of my cellphone reflecting off my wet surrounds. Not much further.
As my feet landed on solid ground, I breathed a sigh of relief. A steady stream of people were walking the path back to a small side gate into campus. I almost jumped out of my skin as the sky lit up with a huge crackle of lightning. Screams pierced the night as the sky rumbled and the first drops of rain hit the ground. Wrapping my arms tightly around the shirt Elena made me wear, I moved quicker, breaking into a fast jog.
Within seconds, the rain was coming so fast that I had to squint my eyes to see. The thin material covering my body was no protection against the sting of each drop as it landed on me. Relief washed over me when the gate finally came into view. I was almost back on campus but cursed when I realized that I still had a ways to McGinley.
The rain dripped off me, biting into my skin as it moved down my body. With each step, my feet drowned in a new puddle of water and my soaked hair dripped around my face. As I scanned my surrounds to get my bearings, another crack of lightning rang out. It was so loud that I jumped, lost my footing, and slipped.
"Shit," I cried out into the sheet of water, clutching my ankle as I sat defeated in a drenched heap just outside of the gate. Pain radiated through the bone as I tried to rotate it.
"Hey, are you okay?" a voice called out, and I blinked away the rain, trying to identify the person, but it was impossible to see. "I- I think I sprained my ankle."
"Here, let me see." A hand cut through the wall of water, followed by a body, and then a face.
A face that I recognized.
"Ana? What the hell?" Jackson's voice sounded as shocked as I was to see him. He scooted next to me, balancing on his knees in the rainfall river.
Through chattering teeth, I managed to say, "I was trying to get to my dorm."
His hands felt around my ankle, his touch gentle and warm, leaving a burning trail along my skin. "You're freezing. Come on, we need to get you inside."
He scooped me up and cradled me against him as if I was a feather, not a one-hundred-and-twenty-pound girl. "Which block?"
"McGinley."
"Fuck, that's all the way across campus."
"Sorry."
He didn't reply, just set off in the right direction. The pain searing through my ankle overshadowed all of the questions that I would have been asking under less dire circumstances. Where was Jackson headed so late? Why did I let him hold me like that? So intimately.
Even more confusing, why did I like it? You know why, Ana. Would I ever stop questioning everything?
"I'm going to jog, okay?" Jackson's breath brushed my cheek and the gentle flutter in my stomach picked up speed.
I nodded. It was all I could manage, between trying to focus on anything but the pain and being so close to Jackson.
A few minutes later, Jackson lowered me onto the steps outside McGinley, holding me steady with his arm. The rain still sheeted down, drenching both of us. The damp shirt clung to my body, molding to my curves, and my breath hitched when Jackson’s eyes dropped to my chest. I raised an eyebrow at him, and he shook his head and smiled before holding out his hand. “Key?”
My eyebrow furrowed even more. “Excuse me?”
“The key… for getting inside. If you think I’m leaving you alone, in this weather, you’re crazier than I thought.”
I dug into my pocket, pulling out the key card. “Here.”
Jackson helped me to the door and slid the card between the magnetic strip.
“This is a girls only dorm, you know.”
He laughed. “Please, like I’ll be the only guy passing through these doors before the semester’s out. Which floor?”
“Second,” I said as he pulled me inside, the door clicking shut behind us.
Jackson wasted no time. Scooping me up in his arms again, he navigated his way to the staircase and starting climbing, like he knew exactly where he was going. Maybe he’s hooked up with someone who lives here. I pushed the disturbing thought from my mind, focusing on my breathing.
“Which one is yours?” he asked, eyeing the hallway of identical doors.
“Three B, end of the hallway, next to the emergency stairwell.”
His eyes flashed with something, widening slightly. “Let’s get you home, Ana Parry.”
“Savanah, my real name is Savanah,” I blurted out, feeling the heat of embarrassment color my cheeks. I didn’t know why I felt the need to tell him that, but the words just came tumbling out.
