His hand tightened and tears filled my eyes, both in fear of what he planned on doing and the feeling of being suffocated. In that terrified haze, his words rang in my head. He’d trained my Luca. I was flabbergasted that such a man had any teachings to offer and maybe I was getting a little hysterical.
“Address me properly or I’ll beat some respect into you.” He released me suddenly, and stood there looking down at my petite frame without once ounce of compassion in his gaze. I knew in that moment he would do exactly what he said if I didn’t relent, and my fear grew tenfold.
“I’m s-sorry, S-sir.” I forced the words through my dry lips. “Can I offer you something?” There were many things I was, an idiot was not one of them. Damon was dangerous, and without Luca here to protect me, obeying him was the only option.
“Better. Since Luca doesn’t drink liqueur, I will have a soda. Glass half full of ice, and you can serve it to me on the couch.” His long-legged stride led him to the living room and I’d never been so happy to see a person walk away.
With shaking hands, I pulled a glass out of the cupboard, and filled it underneath the icemaker. Taking a bottle out of the refrigerator I poured it almost to the top and took a deep breath before forcing myself to join him. Stopping in front of the couch I held it out, and his eyes widened incredulously.
“Is that how you serve a Master, girl?”
I had no idea what he was talking about. If Luca wanted a drink, I fixed it and handed it over to him. “I guess so, Sir?” My lips faltered again but I managed to complete the title he felt he deserved.
“Utterly disgraceful. On your knees. Then you lift that glass over your head, with your head bowed.” His voice was little less than a snarl and I felt my nervousness intensify.
Lowering to my knees I tried out the stupid ass position he’d asked, wanting to toss the damn drink in his smug ass face! I hated this man. From the bottom of my gut, wanting to rip his eyes out, hated him! I hoped he choked on the fucking liquid and I wouldn’t offer him any help if he did!
“You need training.” He took the glass from hands and I made to stand up. “Keep your ass in that kneel until I tell you otherwise!” He all but screamed the words and I’d had enough. Damon didn’t tell me what to do. I didn’t give a damn if he was a friend of Luca’s, the man was a completely lunatic.
“Why don’t you kneel your ass on the floor, fuck head!” Standing up with my shoulders pushed back proudly I glared at him, ready to kick him in the balls if he tried to attack me again. Maybe I was stupid for challenging him, but I honestly didn’t give a shit.
I thought I’d be ready if he tried anything else, but he stood so fast and had me flipped on my stomach on the floor before I had time to contemplate a move. His knee rested painfully in the center of my back, and my hands were pinned behind me roughly. “Little girl, it’s time someone taught you a lesson.”
Struggling to free myself, my horror increased as he shifted both my wrists to one large hand, and brought up the hem of my robe with the other. I was completely naked underneath it, and knew I was in serious trouble now. The first thought that went through my mind was he could rape me and I wouldn’t survive living through that again. I was almost relieved when he started spanking me.
It hurt like hell to have him unleash on my ass that way, but it could have easily been much worse. I’d thought Luca had a heavy hand when punishing me, but I quickly learned he’d taken it much easier than he could have because I doubted I’d sit down for a week as his hand continued to beat me. I was sobbing uncontrollably by the time he stopped, pushing me away like a discarded piece of meat.
“I should fuck your mouth until you learn how to use it properly.” I rested on the floor curled into the fetal position, his words making my sobs even louder. “Go clean yourself up and get back here on your knees!”
I was afraid if I didn’t do what he asked he would make his threat a promise, so I scrambled to my feet, running to the safety of the bathroom. Locking the door behind me, I wasn’t opening it until Luca returned. If he allowed his friend to treat me this horribly then I was walking the fuck out of here, no matter how much I knew it would hurt to say goodbye.
My ass was on fire, and my pride hurting even more than that. I had never been so humiliated and I was determined I wouldn’t allow it again. The memories of the abuse I’d suffered under my stepfather’s hands came flooding back and I fell to my knees holding on to the toilet as I threw up. The rage, insecurity, and helplessness were too much and I couldn’t stop the tears from falling. I wanted to go home. I hated this place and Luca for allowing Damon to hurt me this way.
I don’t know how long I sat there feeling sorry for myself but I heard the loud commotion between Luca and Damon going on in the other room then the pounding on the bathroom door. I wasn’t opening it! No way in hell was I suffering anything else tonight. Covering my ears with my hands, I continued to cry, wishing I was anywhere else in that moment.
I saw the doorknob wiggling and it triggered more memories and I felt myself unable to breathe. Taken back years ago in my mind I felt like that insecure little girl who was waiting to be have the monster break in and hurt me again. Grabbing the porcelain in a tight grip, the nausea ripped through me again, and I continued to vomit. “Please, no. I don’t want you hurt me.” My voice wasn’t even my own, it sounded like the young girl I’d once been.
When that door finally opened and I saw Luca, he was just as much of a monster as my stepfather had been and I pressed myself in between the toilet and wall, not wanting him near me. Holding up my hands defensively, I wished for the strength to make this all a nightmare I would wake up from and be safe again.
“Gina. Baby, I’m so very sorry, please honey let me make this up to you.” He took a step closer.
I began to hyperventilate. My eyes were unseeing as I waited for the horror to begin. I knew how this story ended and I was going to suffer.
“I’m not coming any closer, Gina. Look at me, though, okay? Can you do that for me?
I tried to breathe, honestly I did, but the air just wouldn’t fill my lungs. The oxygen seemed to be sucked out of the room as my panic continued to grow and my head grew light. It was better this way. If I passed out then I wouldn’t feel it when he did those vile things to me. As the room turned dark, I was finally safe. No one could hurt me here. It was just me and the emptiness. I’d found this world before.
When I awoke, I was resting in Luca’s bed, the robe still wrapped around me with the comforter covering it. He was pacing the room and I looked around for his friend, that horrible, horrible man that forced me to relive the past. I let out a relieved sigh when I didn’t see him.
“I’ll never forgive myself for leaving you alone with him.” Luca didn’t approach the bed, and there was a wariness in his eyes that made my heart ache for him. I’d lost it, completely. Sure, I was angry he’d left me with Damon, but now that I wasn’t dealing with my other demons I knew Luca would never purposefully hurt me. Well, without permission, anyway. I was still trying to come to some rationalization about why I didn’t mind the things he did to me.
“Can I sit with you, or is that asking too much?” He swallowed convulsively and my normal need to nurture returned.
“Of course you can, Sir.” I whispered the words my throat still raw from the early fit of insanity.
“I don’t deserve to be called that. Just Luca, okay?” There was such despondency in his tone that it broke my heart in another way. Did he no longer want me? Had my breakdown pushed him away?
“You’re sending me home.” Forcing myself to not show any emotion even though inside I felt like I was being ripped apart, was torture.
“No! God! Unless, of course, you can’t forgive me. I fucked up. But I swear I’ll make it up to you if you allow it.” He sat down on the edge of the bed, his deep blue eyes filled with such sorrow that I couldn’t help but raise my hand to his cheek to hold it there. He covered it with his own, a harsh breath releas
ing from his lips as if he’d had trouble breathing himself.
“I don’t want to lose you. Having you here with me has meant so much. We can drop the damn chores, and never play again unless you want to, baby. Just stay with me.” This wasn’t the strong man I’d come to love and the fear in his eyes destroyed me. Did he really think I would leave him voluntarily? Hell I loved the things I was learning thanks to him.
Not knowing what else to do, I climbed over into his lap, resting my head on his chest. My arms snaked around his neck, holding him tightly. “Please, Sir, you’re really confusing me.” I loved him, for all that he was. He couldn’t just take that part of our lives away. I needed him to be my Master.
My words seem to change something in him, and the broken man holding me in his arms, came back to life. He held me tightly in his arms, it was almost hard to breathe but I relished it. That strength was my beacon and I needed him to be my tower of strength. “What do you want, Gina? I need you to tell me.” Even his words were stronger and I breathed a soft sigh of relief.
“I need you, Sir. I want you to tell me everything is going to be all right, and that as long as I’m in your arms nothing can touch me. I want to belong to you completely and never worry that you’ll let me go. I’m not sure I can ever go back to the life I had before we met.”
“I failed you tonight, sweet girl. Never again. I don’t think I have the capacity to let you go.” His hand reached down to lift my chin and his lips pressed lightly against mine. “If you can still trust me after what happened here, I would be honored to make you mine.” He spoke with his lips only scant inches away from mine.
I kissed him hard, not waiting for him to initiate more, I needed to know he still wanted me. It was more than need, it was almost an obsession. Thinking that what we had could all be over would destroy every fiber of my soul. “Make me your willing slave, Sir. Just please, I’m begging you, never send me away.” He was more than just my dominant, Luca was my friend, teacher and inevitably, the Master of my heart.
“We’re going to talk about what Damon did, and I promise he’s out of our lives for good. You’ve been through an ordeal tonight, and we need to discuss the offer you’re making. Giving yourself to me that way is a precious gift, and one I will accept, after you’ve had time to consider it thoughtfully.” He was back to being that dominant male I loved and I grinned.
“Whatever you think is best, Sir.” I knew he would give me what I wanted, there was no doubt in my mind.
“Topping from the bottom.” He shook his head and chuckled before squeezing me against him. “What am I going to do with you?”
“Please don’t punish me, Sir. I don’t think my ass can take another beating tonight.” I knew he was joking, I’d learned to pick up on his moods very well this last week.
He lifted me from his lap and stared at me with something akin to rage. “What did he do to you? Are you hurt? I will fucking kill him!” I’d never seen him so angry and had it been directed at me I might have had another panic attack. The truth was if he beat the shit out of Damon, I wouldn’t exactly have a problem with it.
“He just spanked me, but it still hurts.” I spoke quietly not wanting to add fuel to his anger. Beating was a better word, but I didn’t think throwing that in was the smartest idea when he looked ready to rip Damon’s head off.
“Let me see. Now!” His tone demanded no argument, and I was going to offer one anyway. I knew he wouldn’t hurt me, now that I was clear-headed again.
Kneeling up on the bed, I allowed the robe to fall and from Luca’s quick intake of breath, I could only guess he wasn’t happy with what he saw. “I promise to make him pay for this, sweet girl. Lay face down on the bed, and let me get something to relieve the pain.”
I knew my ass was throbbing but had no idea why he was so angry. It was a spanking, how bad could it be? Luca returned with a tube of cream, glass of water, and a bottle of pills. The look on his face was despondent once again as he put all the items down on the side table and opened up the tube. Smearing my backside with the cooling potion with his gentle hands, I moaned softly as some of the fire left the area.
“These bruises are going to be really defined tomorrow, you will be enjoying some serious downtime for a few days.”
It made sense that the reason it hurt so bad was because he’d left marks, but I was still a little shocked to hear him say it out loud. “Down time, Sir?” He was angry again and I wanted to take his attention away from what his friend had done.
“Pampered like a princess, sweet girl.” My tactic worked because he smiled. “Roll up on your side. These pain relievers should help, and if not, I’ll write you a prescription for something stronger.” I forgot that Luca had a medical degree and I grinned at the thought of calling him Dr. Luca.
“I like seeing you smile.” He winked and I turned on my side, taking the pills from his hand and sipping it down with the glass he held against my lap. “Do you think you can eat? I know we missed our date out, but I could order in some Chinese.”
I wanted to say I wasn’t hungry, but the truth is I was a little since we’d missed dinner. “I’d like that, Sir.”
Pulling his cellphone out he called in a dozen different things that I knew we’d never be able to finish. “I wasn’t sure what you’d like so I ordered a little of everything.”
He held me tenderly in bed until the takeout arrived, then fed me until I was thinking about things other than food. “My insatiable girl.” He kissed my forehead, and then his expression grew stern. “We are not doing anything until you feel better.”
I tried to convince him I was fine, but he turned down that excuse, and spooned with me instead. As I fell asleep, I thought I needed to learn this topping from the bottom thing a little better, because it didn’t seem to work on him. Still being with him at all made it much easier to rest.
chapter 11
Weekend
Luca wasn’t kidding when he said I’d be a pampered princess, he began the morning off by feeding me breakfast in bed, then bathed me in a bubble bath, allowing me to soak in bliss for half an hour. I knew he cared about me, but something had changed in our relationship and it made me feel like that caring had turned into something even deeper. My heart was overjoyed at the way he took care of me.
After my bath he dried me off with tender hands, combed out my hair and eventually dressed me. Giving me a couple of pain relievers, I barely noticed the discomfort in my ass, but he seemed to be very focused on making sure that I wasn’t hurting. Curled up on the couch together, he read a story, and even though the topic was a little over my head, hearing his soothing voice mesmerized me into thinking it was the best book in the world.
Half the day had passed when I made a connection. Luca was treating me like a father, not that mine had been around enough to give me that kind of security. Resting my head against his chest, I had another concern. “Sir?” He was stroking my hair as I sat in his lap, and for the most part I was content.
“What is it, sweet girl?” I lifted my eyes to his, almost hating to break the moment.
“Why am I not undressed?” I had a fear that he no longer wanted me the way he had before. Irrational? I couldn’t say.
“Because we’re not training this weekend. I expect your beautiful body to be on display, and I enjoy the sight, but asking you to walk around without clothing is to make you comfortable in your own skin. You’ve had a traumatic experience, so I’m backing off until I’m sure you’re ready to learn.”
He loved seeing my body, of course that made me feel incredible, although I hadn’t known it was something he did to train me. I just assumed he wanted easy access all the time. The truth was that I no longer minded being naked around him. I wanted him to touch, play, and do those delightful things to me. “I think I miss it, Sir.” I whispered the words, somewhat embarrassed at the revelation.
“Do you now?” He lifted my chin for a kiss, which I eagerly returned. “Do you feel up for a walk?” His eyes s
tared intently into mine as he pulled back.
I felt up to him taking me back to bed and doing wicked things to me, but I nodded instead of speaking that truth. “I’m fine, Sir.”
Carefully lifting me from his lap, I stood and he put his book down on the coffee table. “It’s a beautiful day and I think some fresh air is in order.”
I admit being a little disappointed that he wasn’t in the mood to play, but attempted to hide it as he led me out the door. Walking with him through the park was a great experience, and it felt like we were just any ordinary couple, out for the day together. Since I’d met Luca, our time together had been anything but normal. I saw a side of him that was endearing to me, the man behind the dominant.
He was very informed, and seemed to enjoy opening my eyes to the history of my surroundings. I wondered if there was anything he didn’t know. After our walk his driver took us to a quaint little Italian restaurant, where we enjoyed lasagna. I discovered it was very different than the way my mom made it back home. Not better, mind you, because no one cooked better than she did.
When we finally returned to the penthouse, I was sure he’d take me in his arms, but that’s not what happened at all. We watched some television, and he talked to me about my life before I’d come to Chicago. I was seriously getting frustrated. He was being so patient and loving, and all I wanted to do was crawl into his lap and beg him to make love to me.
The last straw for me was when we finally did make it to bed, and he dressed me in his t-shirt allowing me to wear panties and didn’t cuff my wrist. Unbidden, tears slid down my cheeks, and I turned away from him so he wouldn’t see. I was convinced Luca no longer wanted me.
We were spooning in the dark, but it wasn’t enough. Being in such close proximity allowed him to easily know when my self-pity party left me with tiny hiccups. He turned on the light quickly and looked at me in worried concern. “Are you hurting again? Let me get you some more pain killers.” He made to slide out of bed, and I grasped his wrist.
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