by Sara Hess
“I just came in to see if Nic was working tonight. We’ve been hanging out a lot lately. I’m sure he dumped you pretty quick when he found out you killed your father and then was institutionalized. No one wants to date someone certifiably crazy.” She threw a derisive smirk my way.
Three weeks ago I would have been having a panic attack about this time, but I was able to breathe through the anxiety wanting to take hold of me. I wasn’t going to be weak any longer and succumb to the emotions surrounding my father, or the fear of what people thought or what they might say or do. And my trust in Nic was absolute so Beatrice’s comment held no water with me.
“Beatrice, I know you’re lying about hanging out with Nic because he and I are still seeing each other, and you really have no clue on what you are talking about regardless of what you might have read in the news.”
Beatrice’s eyes narrowed infinitesimally as she seemed to contemplate my words, but then her expression turned calculating. “That might be what he wants you to believe.” She laughed condescendingly.
“It’s what she knows to be true.”
Too many voices were sneaking up on me, but I really didn’t mind this one. I turned to see Nic walking toward us with a hard expression on his face as he glared at Beatrice. When his gaze turned to me it softened and warmed. “Hey, babe. Don’t tell me you’ve had to deal with bitches like her all day?” He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close.
I gaped at him when the word ‘bitches’ came out of his mouth, but then I thought that’s exactly what Beatrice was being. “Uh, no; she’s the first one.” I answered glancing back at Beatrice.
She looked confused, indignant, and furious all at once. “You’re not really still with her are you, Nic? She killed her father and is crazy for fuck sake.”
Nic’s hard gaze zeroed in her again. “Like Carrie said, you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. You’ve been coming in here bugging the shit out of me for more than three weeks even though I haven’t given you the time of day, and so you decide to spew your jealous malice on my girlfriend. What’s it going to take for you to get a clue to leave us the fuck alone?”
I swallowed at the hard tone of Nic’s voice glad it wasn’t directed at me; it would have put me in tears. That’s probably because I loved him and those words would have killed me. However, Beatrice’s face kind of froze up. Her lips tightened till they nearly disappeared and her eyes flared with unholy hatred, and it seemed to be for the both of us. Her eyes flickered around at the now five customers’ who’d stopped pretending they weren’t listening to openly stare at us. John was even in the background observing what was going on but appeared to have decided to let Nic deal with it.
Beatrice’s gaze returned to Nic and me. “Whatever…if you want some psycho killer for a girlfriend than I don’t want you anyway.” Then with a flip of her hair she walked away.
“Wow, did she just break up with you?” I asked looking after Beatrice’s retreating figure.
Nic, John, and even the customers burst out laughing.
“Damn, if anyone was psycho it was that girl.” One of the male customers said giving me an admiring smile. He looked about Nic’s age and I guess was relatively attractive. I never really noticed other guys much. I never noticed them before Nic because I was too closed off and I never noticed them now because of Nic. He was everything to me.
Nic’s arm tightened around my waist pulling me closer. I saw the customers gaze travel above my head and his smile dimmed slightly. He lifted his hand and gave Nic a two finger salute. “Lucky bastard.” The guy gave me a half smile before turning away.
The rest of the customers followed suit and John stepped forward to apologize for all the drama. Nic turned me around in his arms. His expression was somber but the look in his eyes was fierce. I could tell he was trying to keep his roused emotions contained.
“I heard you telling her off…” The right side of Nic’s mouth curved up. “…in your own too nice of a way, and I have to say I’m proud of you.” He leaned down to kiss me. “If she comes near you again tell her to fuck off.” He whispered in my ear.
I chuckled. “Uh, I’ll try.”
He chuckled in return and raised his head. “I probably shouldn’t hold my breath though, huh?”
“Probably not.” I just couldn’t see myself saying that to someone. I had a feeling if I tried it would just sound lame coming from my lips.
Nic’s hands rubbed up and down my arms. “So, besides that witch, everything else went okay for you today?”
I looked up into his concerned expression. “Everything was good.” As I relayed this to him I knew that it wasn’t likely to stay that way. This had only been the first day after the article. Word would spread; by Beatrice, maybe Nikki, and other’s. It wouldn’t stay quiet for long, and I pledged that I would keep it from Nic as long as I could. I didn’t need him worrying more than his already did about me.
I caressed my hand down his chest to his abdomen. “It’s closing time, you wouldn’t by chance know someone who could give me a ride home, do you?”
The green of Nic’s eyes deepened. I saw desire burn in them as his hands tightened on my arms pulling me closer. “As a matter of fact I know just the person. “ Bending down he caressed my mouth softly. “I love you.”
My heart swelled. “I love you, too.”
Two minutes later we were out the door and Nic was driving me back to my dorm room, and when we got there he showed me in two different ways how much he loved me.
∞ ∞ ∞
The rest of the week went exactly as I thought it would. Tuesday, in both my classes, I noticed a few curious glances thrown my way with some whispering going on between seated classmates, and work seemed to have more than the its normal share of customers exhibiting some serious unrestrained staring with more whispering. They would then either leave without buying anything or buy something random like a key chain or bumper sticker.
Wednesday’s classes and work consisted of yet more people staring and whispering, and Thursday it was double that. By Friday all the students in my class were going to have neck problems from all the head craning they were doing, and work was going to sell out of key chains and bumper stickers from all the indiscriminate shoppers stopping in. Although, quite a few people splurged and bought more expensive merchandise, so at least I felt like I was taking one for the store.
The entire experience was extremely difficult, but I told myself I was stronger than I was before. I wasn’t going to hang my head and try to go unnoticed. I kept my head up and I looked people in the eye. Most of them would look away, but there were those who stared unabashedly. Some people were also very blatant with their whispering, not seeming to care if I heard; either that, or they wanted to me hear.
The words ‘murderer’ and ‘crazy’ made my gut clench and nausea churn but I was able to breathe through it and keep a somewhat tranquil expression. Because of my introverted manner I hadn’t made any close associations or friends with anyone in my classes so I had to deal with it mostly alone.
However, not everyone was cruel, there were some people who smiled at me with commiseration and others who would sit next to me and not make a big deal out of who I was or what they had heard. In some way it seemed like they were doing what they could to show me support in some sympathetic manner.
There was this one girl who had sat down next to me on the second day of my Computer Programming 102 class. She introduced herself as Shaw and then plopped herself down next to me as though I wasn’t getting stared at by everyone in the class. She’d even made a few comments about class assignments in this completely effortless way that told me she was trying to give me some semblance of normal beyond what everyone else was doing.
I’d appreciated her efforts so much that I’d given her a smile and went out of my comfort zone as I had with Nic by starting a conversation with her. I’d learned she was a freshman like me, lived in the same dorm I did, and was also there
on a scholarship. It was quite surprising how much we had in common, and I actually felt like I might be making another friend.
I kept most of what I was going through from Nic but I wasn’t able to entirely snow him because he saw the people staring, pointing and whispering when I was with him. He didn’t ignore it though. He called people out if they stared too long at me. I’d had to hold him back a few times when he would catch guys staring overly long at me. I told him that people were bound to be curious and stare. I was a traffic accident that not a lot of people could turn away from. He’d acquiesce, but his glower in their direction would have them turning away if not running away.
I did keep from him the few calls I’d gotten from reporter’s and the fact that several guys had come on to me in really upsetting ways. I’d been hit on by guys before, but not with this kind of offensiveness. Two guys had said that my being a murderess made me hotter, and that was some of the nicer things being said to me. Mercifully, they approached me in public so I was able to walk away without feeling too threatened, but it had been scary in a way and made me feel particularly sullied.
In fact, it was Friday and I was exiting my last class of the day in a near sprint because one of my male classmates had just made a very lewd comment. I hurried out of the building my heart beating painfully and headed toward the cafeteria where I was meeting Nic for lunch. The one thing I hadn’t been able to retain when I’d gone into the hospital was my position with Prof. Gale so I’d been having all my lunches with Nic and sometimes Amanda as well as the other guys.
Glancing behind me I noted the guy who’d made the comment and two of his friends come out of the building and start to follow me. My heart jumped in panic and I picked up my pace. It wasn’t far to the cafeteria but I wasn’t able to get there before they closed the distance between us to about five yards where they began harassing me again.
“Hey, sweet tart, why you rushing away?”
I had a feeling that ‘tart’ comment wasn’t meant as an affectionate epithet. I tried to block my ears to what they were saying.
“There are probably not a lot of people wanting to spend time with you, but we want to.”
Ignore, ignore, ignore. I felt my throat getting a little tight.
“Come on, baby, let us show you a good time.”
Well, that just made me mad. Nic called me baby, and I didn’t want this guy ruining the endearment. I spun around my fear turning to anger. I’d given up my beanie cap, realizing that I’d been using it to hide under, so my loose hair swung around blowing in my face. I brushed it away.
“Don’t call me that. I’m not your baby. And stop following me or I’m going to start screaming for security.” I said tightly.
The guys closed the distance between us to just a couple feet and the looks on their faces said they weren’t deterred by my threat. They formed a half circle around me leering down at me which made me think maybe I shouldn’t have stopped. Their nearness was intimidating and disturbing, but I breathed out my unease knowing I was safe surrounded by other students.
“You’re not going to scream because you would only look stupid since we haven’t even touched you, and I’m someone who likes to do my touching privately anyway.” These words came from the guy who’d first approached me in class.
All the guys were kind of big, around six feet. The harassing one was a dirty blonde and more muscular and fit than the other two who were a little overweight and had darker hair. None of them were attractive, but their horrendous behavior could have a big part of making them appear that way.
“Just stop harassing me or I’ll report you to campus security.” I was sick and tired of dealing with this crap. I wasn’t going to allow these guys or anyone else to continually hassle me.
“It would be your word against the three of ours and yours I don’t think is very credible.” The blonde was doing all the talking and seemed to be the leader and instigator of the trio.
“Maybe, maybe not, but it would be reported and recorded. Do you want your names connected to something like that?” I asked.
The two guys flanking him shifted and looked troubled at my query, but the instigator didn’t look disturbed at all.
“I doubt it would cause me too much harm being that the so called victim was a murderer, crazy, and a slut.” He replied with a mocking smile.
Now I was a slut on top of everything else? I didn’t understand how people could be this horrible and nasty. Any fear that was in me seemed to dry up instantly and I looked at him in mystification. “Have you at all wondered what my whole story is, or do you not care as long as it gives you someone to pick on? Are you really this malevolent?”
The guys next to him shifted once more at my words and their expressions might have actually looked shamed, but again the instigator looked unmoved at my words.
“I don’t really care about your life story. You’re a hot little piece and I thought you would appreciate some company. Everyone is probably treating you like a pariah and I’m just trying to be friendly.” The guy said with sneer and a leer.
“Oh shit, Mike. Nic Stanford and Seth Weston are coming this way and they look pissed as hell. Let’s get the fuck out of here.”
These alarmed words came from the overweight, brown haired guy to the right of the instigator, who I now knew was Mike. I turned to indeed see Nic and Seth coming in from the left of us at a run with identical expressions of anger. If the three meatheads surrounding me would have actually done what the hanger-on had suggested they might have escaped, but they were either too slow in reaction time or they decided to stick it out.
Two seconds later I was flanked by two very large, very irate males who looked like they were out for blood. The other guys backed up a couple steps and they no longer looked as intimidating compared to Nic and Seth. Nic looked down at me and I could see the worry in his eyes even as his face contorted with fury. Seth settled on the other side me and his face also held a mixture of concern and anger.
Nic turned to face the three guys who were lined up as though preparing for a confrontation. “What’s going on here?” Nic asked.
The soft question was in sharp contrast to the threat in his tone and the wrath hardening his face. It sent a chill down my back and I had to wonder what it did to the guys, because even though there were three of them Nic and Seth were taller and bulker…at least in muscle.
“Nic, don’t…”
Seth’s large hand landed on my shoulder interrupting me. I looked up at him with a frown but he just stared ahead at the three guys with a harsh expression.
What…was it quiet time for me right now?
“I asked you a question. What’s. Going. On. Here?” Nic punctuated each word in a steely tone and took a step closer. I instinctively reached out and grabbed his belt loop hoping to stop whatever it was he might do. His hand moved around and covered mine giving it a gentle squeeze but he didn’t turn around.
The two guys with Mike nearly jumped back at Nic’s threatening move. Mike took a step back as well but he was able to not look like he was going to soil his pants as he did it.
“Are you still seeing this chick, Nic? You’ve got good prospects; I wouldn’t think you’d want her name connected to yours.” Mike the instigator said in conciliatory tone.
“That comment just lost you one of your testicles, asshole, and I wasn’t asking your opinion, I asked what you were doing?” Nic said coldly.
Mike’s expression lost a little of its cool at Nic’s threat. He held up his hand. “Hey, I didn’t know there was still a thing between you two. Sorry if I was stepping into your territory.”
Nic’s hand on my mine tightened briefly before letting go, but my hand remained securely latched to his belt loop. I would have plastered myself to his back, but Seth’s hand on my shoulder kept me from moving forward.
“What did you say to her, cocksucker?” Nic growled menacingly and I could actually feel the vibrations of his muscles twitching just from holding his pan
ts.
Mike’s eyes flared, I wasn’t sure if it was with anger or apprehension. “The girl is good-looking; you can’t fault me for appreciating her.”
“Oh, I could definitely find fault with ass-bags like you, and all I can say is that you had better not have laid a damn finger on her. If I find out that you did I’ll find you, cut off your balls, and shove them down your fucking throats. The three of you cocksuckers were basically surrounding and were obviously intimidating Carrie and the only reason I’m not rearranging your dumbass faces right this instant is because my girl is holding me back and I don’t want to upset her. But if I see any of your motherfucking faces near her again they won’t be able to find your damn teeth, and you had also better hope I don’t see you off campus without her there to keep me sane, because I won’t be this nice next time. Now get the fuck out of here.”
Nic’s voice had remained level during his whole speech but the rage coloring each word couldn’t be missed. I had also never heard him swear so much in the whole time I’d known him. He was pissed.
Mike’s features had tightened with each word out of Nic’s mouth and his eyes were narrowed as he faced off with him. Again, I was uncertain on whether it was from trepidation or anger. Maybe it was both. Guys had their pride, but Nic and Seth were definitely a force to be reckoned with.
“Mike, let’s go.” The guy on the right spoke up again. He looked undeniably concerned with the outcome of Mike’s decision because his gaze flickered apprehensively between Nic and Seth.
Five more seconds passed before Mike finally turned to leave without saying another word. His friends were one step ahead of him…moving fast.
Nic remained unmoving for a moment but then he turned and looked down at me with anger still contorting his face, but I could see he was trying really hard to manage it. He gripped my upper arms and leaned down so we were face to face, and that’s when I noticed Seth had finally released me. “Tell me you haven’t been dealing with this kind of shit all week.” His eyes were fierce.
