“So you just need to stay within fifteen minutes of the airport, right? I could meet you at that coffee shop near headquarters.”
“All right.”
“Twenty minutes?”
“Fine.”
He arrived in fifteen, but she was already there, stirring her coffee with a plastic stick. A second cup sat in front of the chair across from her. Her expression was hard to read. He took the other chair. “Hi.”
“I got you a cappuccino.”
“Thanks.”
Volta watched him sip his coffee, her blue eyes unblinking. “Did the Travert Foundation bring you back to consult on your recommendations?”
He shook his head. “I’ve followed up with them and they’re moving forward on the project. No, I’m here filling in for Lindsey Catlin while she’s on maternity leave.”
Volta tilted her head. “I’m confused. You’re what?”
“Working as a locum in an ob-gyn practice here in Anchorage.”
“Working as a locum? What about DEMA?”
“I resigned.”
“Resigned? Why?”
“Because...because I love you.” There. He’d blurted it out. He’d meant to explain it a little better and lead up to it, but that was what this was all about.
Volta didn’t seem convinced. “What’s love got to do with it?”
“Everything. After spending time with you and Emma, I realized traveling with DEMA wasn’t what I want anymore.”
She narrowed her eyes. “What do you want?”
“I want you, us. I want to be part of your life, yours and Emma’s.”
“Really.” Her voice was flat. “You want to be a part of our lives, so you took a job as a locum in Anchorage.”
“Yes,” he answered immediately.
“Because you enjoy being with us.”
“Yes.” This time his answer was a little slower because that flashing light in her eyes was clearly a warning.
“Isn’t that sweet? You want to take time off to play house in Alaska for a while, get Emma attached to you again, and then you’ll go back to your job and leave us to pick up the pieces.”
“I told you. I resigned.”
“But one word from you and they’d put you right back on staff, wouldn’t they?”
“Well...”
“Wouldn’t they?” she demanded.
“Okay, yes. But I’m not going back. I’m here to build a new life.”
“I want to believe you.”
“You think I’m lying?” He’d quit DEMA and come all the way to Alaska. What more proof did she want?
“Only to yourself. You think you can give up your career—the career that demanded one hundred percent of your time and energy for ten years—without any regrets? Start from scratch?”
“I intend to try.”
“You do that.” She snapped the lid back on her cup and stood. “But when you’ve got it figured out, forget my number. Because I’m not in on this grand experiment, and I’m darn sure not going to get Emma involved. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, it’s on me. Letting it happen a third time would be plain stupidity.”
“Volta—”
“Enjoy your cappuccino. I need to get back to work.” And she walked out of the coffee shop without another word.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
“CAN WE GET a dog?”
Not this again. Volta met Emma’s eyes in the rearview mirror before the light changed and she pulled forward. “Still no. We’ve talked about this. With the sort of schedule I have, it wouldn’t be fair to a dog.”
“Sabrina would take care of it when you’re working. She said so.”
That didn’t sound like something Sabrina would bring up without checking with Volta first. “When did she say that?”
“Yesterday, when her and Uncle Leith took me to the dog park with Tal and Boomer, I told them you said I could get a dog if somebody could take care of it while you were working. And she said she would.”
“I did not say that.”
“Yes, you did. You said we can’t have a dog because you can’t take care of it. But if she took care of it—”
“Emma, no. We’re not getting a dog that someone else has to care for.”
“But we keep Tal and Boomer sometimes, when they go on trips and stuff.”
“Yes, occasionally. But not on a regular basis like work.”
“But—”
“No.” They’d arrived at the stables. “Come on. Len is waiting for you.”
After using her most dramatic sigh to let Volta know she was being entirely unreasonable, Emma climbed out of the car. “Did you bring carrots? Len never remembers like Dr. Scott always did.”
“Yes.” Volta pulled a plastic bag from her purse. “I did.”
They walked to the barn, where Emma’s new instructor was waiting. Len seemed nice enough, but he couldn’t generate the level of enthusiasm that Scott had. The two weeks of horse camp Emma was so excited about had been a minor letdown. She’d enjoyed riding with the other kids, but she complained that they were teaching the same stuff Scott had already taught her.
As they came to the trailhead next to the parking lot, Volta saw a man on a stocky palomino horse riding toward them. Emma saw him, too. “Look. It’s Dr. Scott. He’s here!”
Shoot. The last thing she’d wanted was for Emma to run into Scott. “Come on, sweetie. We need to get to your lesson.”
“But—” Emma started to say something. Then her mood seemed to deflate like a leaky balloon. “He’s riding without me. I guess he doesn’t want to be my friend anymore.”
This was going from bad to worse. Should she confess to Emma that the reason Scott hadn’t contacted her was because Volta had forbidden him to? Letting them spend time together would have been just asking for Emma to be hurt again, but was it fair to place the blame on Scott?
Scott spotted them and dismounted, leading his horse toward them. “Hi, Volta. Emma. I see—”
Emma raised her chin and walked past him. “Come on, Mommy. I need to get to my lesson.”
Volta hesitated, wanting a word alone with Scott. “Go on ahead. I’ll be right there.”
Scott looked after Emma, his brown eyes sad. He turned to Volta. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize Saturday morning would be when Emma—”
“Yes, she has a regular schedule now. Ten thirty on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. I’d appreciate it if you’d avoid being at the barn at those times.”
He nodded and looked toward the barn. “She’s really upset with me for leaving before the show, isn’t she?”
Volta blew out a breath. “Mostly, she’s upset because she thinks you came back to town and didn’t care enough to call her. That you don’t like her anymore.”
Scott’s eyes narrowed. “You told her that?”
“No. That’s what she assumed when she saw you.” She had to set this right. “Don’t worry. I’ll explain later. She’ll understand.”
“I wish I knew how you were going to explain, because I sure as heck don’t understand.” He shook his head. “Never mind. I’ll ride for another fifteen minutes to give Emma time to get out of the barn, so she won’t have to endure my presence there.” He swung up onto the horse’s back and headed toward the trail.
“Scott?” Volta waited until he stopped the horse and looked back. “How is it going? Do you like the new job?”
“It’s... I’m in an adjustment period, learning the ropes.”
“Oh.” Adjustment period. Right. Code for he hated it. The minute the doctor he was filling in for was ready to return, he’d be out of there. Just as she’d predicted. “Okay, well, thank you for giving Emma space.”
He nodded and rode off. Volta slowly made her way toward the barn. She was doing the right thing, keeping Scott away from
Emma and out of their lives. Scott had spent his entire professional life traveling for DEMA. He might think he was ready for a change, but he wasn’t going to settle down and join a practice in Anchorage. Not for long. Soon, DEMA would be calling on him, needing him for just this one emergency, and then another, and before long he would be back where he belonged, like some sort of superhero traveling the world and saving people.
At the barn, Len and Emma had Butternut saddled. Emma mounted the horse. Len reached for the bridle to lead her outside. “We’re going to work on form in the arena the whole hour today,” Len told Volta.
“Okay, thanks.” Volta went to the bleachers on the far side to watch.
She tried to concentrate on Emma, but her thoughts kept returning to Scott. He’d looked so sad when Emma snubbed him, it was all Volta could do not to put her arms around him and assure him she’d fix everything. And she would, or at least she’d tell Emma the truth. But she couldn’t fix the underlying issue, which was that Scott would be leaving again.
But what if he was ready to leave his old life and settle down in Anchorage? At the coffee shop, he’d told Volta he loved her. But he’d loved her before and that didn’t stop him from leaving her.
The barn doors were visible across the arena, and the back end of a palomino horse was disappearing inside. Volta got up and slipped over to the barn. She found Scott in the stall, running a brush over the horse, who, judging by his half-closed eyes, was enjoying the massage.
She came to lean against the gate. “Hi.” He acknowledged her presence without any show of surprise.
She watched him groom the horse for a few minutes before she spoke again. “Scott, I’m sorry I was so...” She trailed off, not sure how to end that sentence. He ducked under the horse’s neck and began brushing the other side without answering her.
Maybe she should just leave. But she couldn’t seem to walk away without knowing more. “You said you were in an adjustment period. What did you mean by that?”
“Why do you care?”
Good question. But she did care, whether she wanted to or not. “Look, I’m only trying to protect Emma’s feelings. I do care how you’re doing, and what challenges you’re facing.”
Scott lifted the horse’s foot and did something to the hoof. “On one hand, it’s nice to know what to expect mostly, day to day, and have all the best equipment right there in the office, and a lab in the same building. But...”
“But what?”
He let the horse set his hoof down. “Just little things. Like when we do an ultrasound, the tech gives the patient a printout in a cute little folder with duckies on the cover.”
“What’s wrong with that?”
He gave a half smile. “Nothing. It’s cute. It’s just... I’m not used to cute.”
“What you mean is you don’t feel like you’re saving the world when you hand out a duckie photo cover.”
Scott shrugged. “Maybe that’s it. Not that I ever believed I was single-handedly saving the world—”
“But you single-handedly saved some babies and mothers that wouldn’t have made it without you.”
“And lost some, too.” He patted the horse’s neck. “But you understand this. You live in Anchorage. You could have been an EMT on an ambulance locally. Instead, you got flight-certified so you could help people who didn’t have easy access to hospitals and ambulances.”
“You’re right. I do understand.” Volta straightened the cuff of her shirt. “And that’s why I think when this assignment is over, you’ll be going back.” She met his eyes. “Because that’s the life you chose.”
“What do I have to do to prove to you I’m serious about staying here? To make you trust me?”
“I honestly don’t know.” She wanted to trust him. She believed he was trying. But she wasn’t willing to risk her heart, again, and she certainly wasn’t willing to risk Emma’s. “I just know that experience has taught me I’m better off steering clear of you.” Volta looked at her watch. “Emma will be bringing her horse back in here in about ten minutes. Please be gone by then.”
And this time, she was the one who walked away.
* * *
SCOTT STEPPED OUT of an exam room and into his office to jot a note about the patient he’d just seen. He glanced at the calendar. Today was Thursday. Emma would be riding this morning. He wished he could be there with her, or at least see her, but Volta was right. Until he was absolutely sure he could promise them forever, he needed to stay out of her life.
Last night, Lindsey had called to see if everything was going smoothly in her absence. He had almost been tempted to suggest she find another locum to cover the rest of her maternity leave. After all, the whole reason he’d come to Alaska was to be with Volta and Emma. Without them, what was he proving?
As it stood now, he spent weekdays seeing patients and went home to an empty apartment at night and on weekends. He had more free time than he’d had since he was a teenager, but he was clueless about how to fill the empty hours.
The nurse stuck her head in. “Patient in exam room two. Michelina Norman.”
“Thanks, Peggy.” His mood brightened. He’d seen Michelina twice before. At forty, she’d already been considered high risk, and then at twenty-eight weeks of pregnancy, she’d developed gestational diabetes. Since then she’d been coming in for weekly checkups.
One of the things he did like about this job was getting to know his patients on an ongoing basis, and Michelina was one of his favorites. She had a smile for everyone, from the noisy toddler in the waiting room to the doctor poking her with instruments. Her pregnancy had been a complete surprise. She considered it a miracle.
Scott knocked and entered. “Hello, Michelina. How are you today?”
“I’m great. Did you take advantage of the sunshine this weekend?”
He smiled at her. She always seemed to be more interested in everyone else than she was about herself. “I went horseback riding on Saturday. How about you?”
“That sounds nice. I don’t think I could climb onto a horse right now.” She pointed to her bulging tummy and laughed. “But my husband and I had the whole family over for a barbecue. Don’t worry, I didn’t pig out on potato salad.”
He checked her chart. “Your weight gain is healthy. How have your glucose levels been this week?”
“Good. I’ve taken to nibbling instead of meals.”
“Great idea, both for your blood sugar and to avoid heartburn. Is the baby pushing on your stomach?”
“He thinks it’s a soccer ball. I can’t wait until he’s born and I can take a full breath. Although I’ve been breathing easier the last day or two.”
“Let’s take a look.” At Scott’s request, she lay back on the table and he checked her abdomen. “The baby has dropped. You’re getting close.”
“That’s good news. The nursery is ready. When do you think it will happen?”
“Soon. Which I’m sure you already suspected, since your due date is next week.”
“I’ve been having more Braxton Hicks contractions.”
“That’s a positive sign. I’m on call this weekend, so if he decides to come, I’ll be the one delivering him.”
“Fingers crossed.”
Scott smiled and moved on to his next patient in a better frame of mind.
* * *
ON SATURDAY NIGHT, Scott’s phone woke him. More correctly Sunday morning, he realized as he answered. It was the hospital, calling to let him know Michelina was there and in labor. She was dilated to a six, so birth most likely wasn’t imminent, but with her risk factors, he decided to head on over anyway.
With the streets almost empty, he made excellent time. He got scrubbed and gowned. When he walked into the room, Michelina was in the middle of a contraction, her husband holding her hand. “Hee hee. Ho ho ho,” he chanted, as though casting an incantation to
relieve his wife’s pain. If only it worked like that.
The contraction must have eased because Michelina opened her eyes and grinned. She seemed thrilled to see him. “Dr. Willingham, you’re here!”
“I couldn’t miss the party.” He introduced himself to her husband while he checked the monitors. Her vitals looked fine. “How are you doing?”
“I’ve been better,” she admitted, while her husband mopped the sweat from her forehead.
“I’ll bet. Let me check your progress.” Scott handled the exam. “You’re already at a nine. You work fast.”
“Here comes another one.” She started to pant.
“You’re doing great with your breathing. Don’t push yet.”
Two more contractions and she was fully dilated. Scott and the nursing team moved into position. It only took a few more contractions before the baby crowned. “Almost there, Michelina. You’re brilliant.”
But on the next contraction, the baby’s head moved forward a fraction, and then reversed. Scott kept his voice calm but signaled the nurses. “Shoulder dystocia. Scalpel, please.”
The nurse’s eyes grew wider over her mask, but she handed him the scalpel. He made the incision. “Michelina, I want you to pull your legs toward your stomach, please.”
A frightened whimper escaped, but Michelina complied, with the nurses guiding her legs in place. He pressed on her abdomen. For a long moment, nothing happened, but then he felt the rotation under his hand. He smiled behind his surgical mask.
The next contraction started. “There we go. One more push, and here he comes.” The baby was in his hands. Breathing well, good color. His short delay didn’t seem to have done him any harm.
Within minutes, he was cleaned and wrapped up and in his mother’s arms. Tears of joy ran down her face. “He’s so beautiful.”
“Yes, he is,” Scott agreed.
Michelina’s husband kissed his wife’s forehead and reached out to touch his baby, a smile of wonder on his face. This was a fortunate child, to be so welcomed, so wanted. Scott was honored to have played a part in bringing him into the world.
As Scott walked out to the parking lot, the sun rose over the mountain in an explosion of pinks and purples. Scott stopped to take in the beauty of a new beginning. It would be a fine day.
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