He stared them all down for a moment more, and then made his way to the couch. He grabbed a blanket, took off his shoes, and laid down.
The others, knowing the discussion was over– at least for the night– all awkwardly cleaned the kitchen, and made their way back to their respective rooms to sleep, without much more of a word spoken.
“Hey,” Derrick whispered to Nolan and Cody, “I’m gonna lock that girl’s door from our side, just to be sure she doesn’t like… you know, kill us.”
“Relax, alright? We’ll be fine” Nolan said, making his way upstairs behind a grumbling Derrick. Cody was about to follow, but decided to make his way over to the living room with Luke first. He sat on the parallel-facing table and looked at Luke, who laid silent and still.
“Hey,” Cody said, checking if Luke was still awake. He almost certainly was– ironically, it wasn’t very easy for Luke to fall asleep anymore– but it was still always good to check.
“Yeah?” Luke muttered, rolling over to face Cody. He still seemed a bit on the defensive, but Cody of all people could work past that easily.
“You good?” he asked, looking Luke directly in the eyes. None of them knew how, but after the incident, Luke’s eyes slowly turned to an almost shining silver color; they honestly were kind of nice looking; cool even. Cody would never say that to Luke– he couldn’t inflate his old friend’s ego too much.
“I…” Luke sighed. “Yeah, I’m good. I just… I know this is the right thing to do, Codes, it is. It’s new for us– I mean we were never gonna be parents, and now we’ve got a little girl on our hands– but we need to do this, I believe that. Maybe we’re getting a chance that we lost five and a half years ago, you know?” Cody cracked a small smile.
“Yeah, I know,” he said. “But Luke, honestly, talking to me… are you sure you can do this? All of this?” He gestured toward him. Luke looked at the ground for a moment, and then back to Cody.
“I have to,” he answered. Cody just gazed at him for a moment longer, and then gave a small nod, getting up from the couch. That was enough to convince him, at least.
“You sure you don’t want me or one of the other guys down here with you?” he asked.
“Nah, I don’t wanna keep you guys up all night; I tend to get kind of restless in my sleep.”
“Yeah, right. Well, if you need anything, just holler.”
“Funny,” Luke smiled. Cody smiled too.
“Goodnight, Luke.”
“Night, buddy.”
Cody walked upstairs as Luke tried and drift off to sleep. He knew Cody hated to see him like that; they all did. They’d known each other for so long now, and Luke had always been held down by his anxieties, but nonetheless he put on a brave face for the people around him.
Even now, in this very moment, he was doing it– but this other side? The issues he had to deal with? It was a brand-new level of hell, and unlike when they were kids, there was nothing any of them could do now to stop it; even Nolan could hardly subside it.
But they would try. They would stay there with him, through thick and thin, hell and high water, and bad and worse and worst. He would do it for them, and they all knew that. As simply as it could be put: they all knew, at the end of the day, they just had to.
Pretty late into the night, perhaps even the next day, Luke still wrestled with his seemingly ever-chirping mind to try and sleep. It was never an easy fight– more often than not he’d lose it– and the couch certainly didn’t help, but he knew the girl needed the bed more. She deserved it, after such a long day.
It broke Luke’s heart to even imagine what kind of hell she must have been through before she’d shown up at their doorstep, and even then, she probably still thought she was in the thick of it. She might even still be, depending on what was going on.
When Luke was as young as her, the only thing he ever worried about was fighting with Nolan and Adam over video games and tv shows, not whether or not he’d manage to live to the next day, running from God knew what kind of dangers. Who knew if the kid even had any concept of what life really was; what it was meant to be?
He heard rustling coming from above him, and he watched the ceiling carefully, picking out the noises as best he could. The sounds came from his room, which was unsurprising for a number of reasons. The girl was– as Luke thought– probably scared shitless, and the guys were all pretty heavy sleepers once they passed out.
Slowly Luke rose, and rubbed his prickly beard in his hands. He paused for a moment, trying to weigh out whether he should leave her alone or not, but really, he always liked it when people checked in on him, so he ought to do the same.
As he made his way up the staircase, the rustling from his room got only more and more frequent. Clearly, she had just woken up, and found herself totally in the dark concerning what was happening.
Once he got to the top of the stairs, Luke saw the door creak open, as the girl’s tiny, shaking head peered out, scanning the dark floor as best she could. Luke leant down a little and waved, trying his best to seem not only friendly, but unarmed.
“Hey!” he whispered, making her jump, and glare at him like a deer in headlights. “Don’t worry, you’re alright. I just let you take my bed, since you seemed so cold; I’ve got pretty nice covers.”
He did his best to laugh a little, but she seemed unphased herself. The girl was just tense, and stared at Luke like he wasn’t to be trusted. He didn’t blame her, but all the same, it hurt to see a child so afraid like that. So… alone.
“Mind if I come in for a second?” he asked, getting to the door and holding it open a bit more. She hesitated, but then the girl receded into the room, backing into a corner like a wild animal.
Luke just walked over to another corner, where his guitar sat leant against a wall. He hadn’t touched it in months at least, but now seemed a good a time as any to pick it back up. He could at least try.
He moved back over to the bed, and sat on an edge, the girl still eyeing him up from the other side of the room. He put on another warm smile, and patted down the cushions by the headboard.
“Come on, it’s alright,” he said. “I promise it’s a lot warmer under these covers than in that corner, and I swear I don’t bite.”
She waited, constantly glancing at the bed sheets and pillows she’d just left. After a bit of pause, she ran to the mattress and leapt under the covers, hiding all of herself from Luke but her eyes. He just chuckled and glanced down at the guitar, remembering his grip.
“It’s been a long time since I used this thing,” he whispered, glancing at the door to be sure the others wouldn’t wake up. “It must sound awful.”
He strummed it, and as expected, the guitar was remarkably out of tune, to which he winced. He heard what sounded like the smallest, most reserved of giggles, and he looked over to the girl. She was hidden, but something in her eyes seemed more… relaxed. Even if it was only slightly.
“You like that?” he asked, strumming a few more times. She tried to hide it, but Luke could hear another soundless chuckle or two escape her nostrils. “Yeah, well just wait until you hear me tune it.” he said, making sure to be slow and methodical with the adjustment of each string.
Every time he made them rise or fall in tune, he would hear her giggle more and more, and after a while, she dropped her defenses, and the blankets around her face went to just above her waist. Luke just chuckled along with her as he tuned it, only sometimes remembering to keep quiet for the others.
Eventually, Luke got it all back to working condition, and strumed a G chord, closing his eyes at the sound. He glanced over at the girl, and her face now seemed so much more amazed. Like she had never heard such a sound in her life.
“It’s nice, right?” he asked. She nodded a little. “I learned how to play a long long time ago, for…for someone who meant a lot to me… God, that was probably before you were even born!”
The girl just kept staring at Luke and the guitar, pining to hear more. Luke was happ
y to finally see an actual child in there, rather than the hardened, terrified survivor they found earlier.
“How about I play a song?” he suggested. “And after that, you go to sleep, and we can deal with everything else in the morning?”
She eyed him curiously; Luke could only imagine so that she could decide whether he was worth listening to. It was valid, given the circumstances, but he was pretty confident she’d agree. For whatever reason, something told Luke they were making a connection.
She nodded, and after darting her gaze all around the room, she nestled into the bed a bit more. Luke just readjusted his own position, and gently strummed down on the strings he hadn’t even realized he’d missed so dearly.
“Once there was a way… To get back homeward…” he sang, looking down at the guitar all the while. He could see as he sang, however, that the girl was already drifting back off to sleep.
Though he was focused on the song, Luke couldn’t help but take notice of just how quiet it all was for once. Not just the room, or the house, but in Luke’s very being, things just seemed so much more at ease, for the first time in such a long time.
It was odd; he had played the guitar a few times in the last several years, both to himself and on a couple occasions the guys, but it never seemed to do the trick. He never got the same feeling he used to when he’d play, even four years ago.
Now though, it felt so… right. So natural, and so earned. He almost thought he felt a part of him kick back up that hadn’t in what seemed like a very long time. And it felt good.
“Sleep pretty darling, do not cry… And I will sing a lullaby,” he finished, putting down one last strum onto the strings, and taking a deep breath. He looked over at the girl, and she was asleep.
He smiled, and carefully rose off the bed, making his way back toward the wall where he left his guitar, and then the door. He creaked it open, peeking his head out as to be sure no one had been disturbed. Thankfully, they were all still asleep.
He stepped outside his bedroom, and watched the girl for a few seconds, making sure she really was asleep. Once he was sure, he couldn’t help but smile again– he wasn’t quite sure why– and he made his way out, shutting the door behind him, and locking it tight.
Luke walked back down to his couch, and laid down once more, staring up at the ceiling. Now, no noise could be heard from above, and strangely, Luke felt rather at peace himself. It took him a while, probably another couple hours or so, but eventually Luke was finally able to fall asleep himself. And then, at long last, the house was truly quiet.
Before – 2
“8:30 p.m.”
“Look I’m just saying, why’d you guys ever hang out with them to begin with?” Sean asked, eyeing Chris and Jeremy.
They were all sitting in Sean’s basement: Jeremy, Chris, Sean, Tyler, and Sam. It reeked of weed and cold pizza, and low, droning music played somewhere in the background. Jeremy was just then coming down off his high, and Chris was still somewhat up there.
“I don’t know I just… we knew each other for a really long time,” Chris explained. “It’s not like we didn’t have issues, but we all got along, you know?”
“Yeah, and like, you like them too, don’t you?” Jeremy said. Sean shrugged, and began to chuckle a little bit.
“I mean, Nolan, Cody, Derrick, hell even Adam? Sure. Luke? That kid is weird, man,” Sean said.
“Yeah, I mean doesn’t he like constantly have anxiety attacks, and get all overly-emotional and shit?” Tyler asked. “Like, way more than a normal person. More than I ever have anyway.”
“Well, not a great example of normal,” Sean taunted. “But yeah, for real. He’s a total weirdo.”
“Yeah, how does someone like that even have a girlfriend?” Sam scoffed.
The others all started laughing, and Chris nervously– as well as somewhat reluctantly– joined in. Jeremy however just grimaced, and stared down at the ground.
“Come on, he’s not…” he tried to defend. “I mean at least he has a girlfriend, you know what I mean?”
“You know, I heard he has like literally no other friends,” Tyler taunted. “Like, other than you guys and the girls and shit.”
“I…I mean that’s not–” Chris tried to say, still chuckling a little.
“Who would want to be friends with him?” Sam said. “Like: ‘Wah I’m Luke, I love being an emotional bitch all the time. I love that my girlfriend loves my giant pussy so much.’” Jeremy shook his head, and glared at Chris. He was getting pissed.
“God, he’s such a freak,” Sean laughed. Jeremy stood up from his seat, and Chris stopped chuckling.
“No, he’s not,” Jeremy said, staring Sean down.
“What? What’s your problem?” Sean asked, still laughing.
“He is not a freak,” Jeremy said. “He gets anxiety, so what!? So do I, so does everyone else!”
“Dude, calm down,” Tyler said, no longer laughing.
“And yeah, he’s emotional, that’s good! He’s more mature than you assholes! He’s willing to show people how he feels! What’s wrong with that!?” Jeremy asked, still shouting.
“Dude he’s so weird! If it weren’t for that girlfriend of his he’d never even talk to anyone!” Sam argued, still sitting down.
“Yeah, and honestly man, she’s pretty messed up–” Tyler said.
“Don’t bring her into this!” Jeremy shouted. “Emily is a great person. And besides I knew Luke way before he started dating her– Chris has known him even longer! He’s a great person, and he sure as hell doesn’t deserve taking shit like this, even if he doesn’t know about it!”
Jeremy looked to Chris, and, after a moment of hesitation, he nodded, and stood up next to Jeremy.
“You guys are assholes,” Chris said. “I don’t know why we even hang out with you. You don’t do anything but shit on other people all the time! You shit on each other, on us, always! That’s not what real friends do.”
“Woah, alright!” Tyler said, offended.
“The hell are you talking about? We don’t do that,” Sam said, annoyed.
“Yeah, okay,” Chris scoffed. “We’ve only got like a week left of school; I can’t believe we bothered spending so much of it with you dickheads.”
“So what, you’re just gonna leave?” Sean asked. “Just… walk out on us, just like that?”
“Yeah,” Jeremy said.
He walked over to the corner of the room and grabbed his things. Chris followed suit. In a few brief moments they were all ready to go, and they made their way out the door.
“Wait!” Sean shouted, causing the guys to stop.
“What?” Jeremy asked, impatient, and far too into his anger to just push past it.
“Are you serious right now?” Sean asked, chuckling as he did. “Are you like, seriously storming out on us, because we talked about Luke?”
Jeremy stared him down, and took a small step forward.
“If any of you say something about him again, if you ever say something to him, that in any way hurts him, and I find out? I will beat the ever-loving shit out of you, and you will not be making it to college next year. That’s a promise,” Jeremy threatened. He turned, and walked out of the door; Chris followed soon after.
They got into Jeremy’s car, and he pulled away from the house. Jeremy seemed to be riding a new kind of wave, this one purely of angered adrenaline. They rode in silence for a while, until Chris decided to speak up.
“So… are you– I mean are we– like, really done talking to them?” he asked, Jeremy just tilted his head in annoyance, and gripped onto the steering wheel tighter.
“I don’t know… But we’re gonna go talk to Luke. And Cody, and Derry, and Adam, and…and Nolan. I don’t care how long it’s been, we’re gonna put this stupid shit behind us; we have to. Luke’s been busting his ass just to get us all together… I’m gonna tell him we’re definitely going to his vacation house, alright?”
Chris paused, staring out the window.
He was shocked at this sudden change of heart in Jeremy. Not that he suddenly cared for Luke– he always had– but now he was suddenly hell-bent on making things better again. Maybe it was just because of the guys, or maybe that it was the end of their senior year. Either way, Chris was admittedly glad to hear it.
“Alright,” he answered, looking back to Jeremy and smiling. Jeremy did a double-take glancing back, and then continued gazing out at the road. He sighed a little in relief, and said nothing more.
Jeremy quickly brought up Luke’s contact in his phone and decided to call him. He took a deep breath while it rang, but after a second, Chris could hear Luke’s voice faintly on the other side of the line.
“Hey… Luke?” Jeremy said meekly. “Hey man, look I know it’s been a while, but uh…look I just wanted to say that Chris and I really… well, look we’re–”
Luke interrupted him then, but Chris wasn’t sure what he said. He just knew it made Jeremy smile, and chuckle a little in surprise.
“Yeah,” he said. “Look we’re…we’re really sorry we haven’t said anything earlier, but uh… both of us are totally down to go to your Maine house, if that’s like, still a thing.”
Chris stared patiently at Jeremy, who just listened to Luke as he spoke softly into the phone. He almost thought he heard Cody shout something too from the background, and Jeremy just laughed a little.
“Alright, cool,” he said. “I’ll uh… I’ll see you later, buddy. Alright, bye.” He hung up, and looked over at Chris, smiling.
“So?” Chris asked. Jeremy nodded.
“Looks like we’re going to Maine with the boys,” Jeremy said. Chris laughed, and couldn’t help but smile, gazing out the window at the town passing them by.
It wouldn’t be easy, getting back into it, but he’d be damned if the guys wouldn’t all get up to that house and make things better again– like they used to be– once and for all.
Day 2002
“The Vision”
The Way Back (Book 2): The Way Back, Part II Page 4
