Shaking his head, Jackson approaches me slowly. He runs the pad of his thumb down my throat, between my breasts, drawing a line straight to my core, leaving a trail of fire behind. Without a word, he takes my hand in his and leads us out the door.
"See that guy over there, the one pretending to talk to his wife?" Jackson asks, interrupting my leisurely float around the pool.
Trying not to be obvious, I roll onto my stomach and look for the person he's talking about. Once I spot him, I lay my head down on the raft, facing Jackson.
"Yeah. What about him?"
"He's been watching you for about twenty minutes now. So have about three other guys. That swimsuit is going to be the death of me. I'm going to end up kicking someone's ass if they talk to you."
A fit of laughter escapes me. I'm not that girl. I'm not the one that guys stare at. You won't find me primping for hours in the bathroom to impress people. I don't care that much. I pull my hair back every day, wear minimal makeup, and dress in clothes that tend to be business casual, not revealing nearly as much as my swimsuit does. I don't get a second glance. Guys don't double take when they pass me on the street. I'm fine with that. It's never bothered me.
"Who cares, Jackson? Let them look. There's only one person on this island that will see what's under the suit. Who do you think that'll be?"
Rolling his eyes at me, Jackson jumps off his raft, pushing it across the pool, and dives under. When he comes back to the surface, he pulls me from my raft, into the water, and wraps me in a sweet embrace. He kisses me softly on the lips, claiming me in front of the spectators he's worried about. It wasn't necessary, but I'm sure he felt he needed to make a point.
Pulling back, I push against Jackson's chest before jumping on his shoulders with all my weight, trying to dunk him under the water. What a foolish mistake. I should have known he would be able to withstand my measly efforts. Giving up after a second, I see the devilish grin appear on his face, but not quickly enough. Attempting to swim away as fast as I can, he snags me by the waist and pulls me to him before dragging us both under water. It happens so fast, I barely have enough time to take a deep breath.
Surfacing, I immediately splash water in his direction while I wipe my face.
"What was that for?" he asks.
"For pulling me under."
"I thought you wanted to go under. Isn't that why you tried to push me under? You had to know I would retaliate."
Of course, I knew. I figured I'd have a chance to get away from him first before he tried.
"Yeah, yeah. Ready to get some food?" I ask, heading toward the steps.
"I'm starving. I'll grab a couple drinks and meet you back at the room to change. Sound good?"
"Perfect," I say, wrapping a towel around me. It may still be in the seventies, but I'm shivering."
After a kiss on the cheek and a swat on the ass, I'm on my way to the room. I can feel his eyes on me as I walk away or so I thought. When I turn around to wave, he's talking to the bartender, ordering our drinks. Water is dripping off the bottom of his shorts. His chest is glistening in the light. I stare for a moment longer before turning back around and running directly into a different hard chest.
"I'm sorry," I say, attempting to step aside without making eye contact.
"Where are you rushing off to?" he asks, his voice sending shivers down my spine the moment it hits my ears.
I recognize that voice.
It's a voice I prayed I would never hear again.
It's the voice of the man who destroyed me and continues to every time I hear his name.
His hand lands on my bare shoulder and I take a step back. My first thought it to slap the shit out of him and run. Then I think about kicking him in his balls followed by the running part. No sooner has that thought crossed my mind than I feel Jackson's presence behind me. Calm washes over me, giving me the confidence to look up, to look him in the eyes.
He's not looking at me, though. He's looking at Jackson. There's a hint of fear in his eyes. I'm not the only one who notices it, I'm sure.
"Can I help you?" Jackson asks, putting a protective arm around my shoulder.
"I was just saying hi to Jessa. We're old friends." The sound of Jeff's voice causes my stomach to turn.
"It doesn't look like she's happy to see you."
"I'm not," I mutter loud enough for both of them to hear me clearly.
"I guess we'll be on our way, then," Jackson announces, escorting me around Jeff, before stopping again. "Let's avoid bumping into each other again, shall we?"
"It's a small island," Jeff replies, his tone taking on more confidence. Big mistake, but he doesn't know that yet.
"I'll catch up to you, Jessa."
"It's not worth it. He's not worth it. I promise," I say, pleading with him while staring into his eyes.
"Jeff?" he asks. Unable to bring myself to say anything, I nod. That's all it takes. He pushes me toward the room, so I walk away without looking back.
Ten minutes later Jackson is walking through the door, calm and collected. I'm not sure how I expected him to be when he got back, but calm was not on the list of possibilities in my mind.
"What happened–What did you do–Did you hit him?" My sentences run together I'm talking so fast. I need answers. I should never have left them alone together. This isn't Jackson's fight, it's mine.
"Nothing happened. We talked. I told him to leave you alone. They're leaving tomorrow, so he won't be an issue for us."
"That's it?"
"Well, I may have embellished our relationship a bit. Also, he might think a few things that are far from true now. One thing is for sure–he won't bother you again. Ever." Jackson's practically grunting as he speaks. He's proud of himself. He stood up for me. I'm surprised he's not beating his chest like a caveman right now.
"So, what exactly did you tell him that may have stretched the truth?"
"Don't worry about it. It was just to get under his skin."
"Whatever. Is he still out there or can we go back to the bar to grab a drink and something to nibble on? My appetite isn't what it was when we were in the pool." My stomach has been churning since I heard his voice. It's starting to mellow a little, but I don't dare eat like we did last night. All that food would come right back up.
"Nope. They're gone."
"They?" Oh. My. God. She's here with him!
"Yeah. They. It's not the girl you think it is. He's here with his girlfriend apparently."
I bet she left him. He probably cheated on her like he cheated on me. It's an addiction. Just like drugs and alcohol, people get off on cheating. It's a high. Until they get caught, that is. I still can't believe I was thinking about forgiving him at one point. I'm so glad I didn't.
Obliterated. That's the only word I can use to describe how drunk I've been these last three days. Even after I was certain Jeff had left the island, I didn't stop my assault on my liver. I'm either hungover or drunk. Drink, sleep, wake up, start drinking to get rid of the hangover, then back to being drunk. Amazingly, I haven't puked yet. I think that had a lot to do with Jackson. He's been forcing me to eat even though I'm not really hungry.
Today is going to be different, though. I promised Jackson that I would calm down. He wants to go snorkeling today, and, in order to do that, I need to have a clear head. It's day six. We only have seven full days before our plane leaves. There's so much we want to do, but I'm lacking motivation. Running into Jeff really took its toll on me.
"Here," Jackson says, dropping a pink envelope with the number sixteen on it.
"Why this one?" I ask. I thought they were supposed to be given to me in order. I've only received one so far. Shouldn't he be giving me the envelope with the number two on it?
"After you fell asleep last night, I used your phone to call Amber. I told her what happened and your current state of mind. She told me to give you this one. She also told me you weren't allowed to drink today and that I needed to let you read this one alone. So, the min
i bar is empty and I'm going to take a walk on the beach while you read. I'll be back in a little bit. If you're up for it, we can go snorkeling after I get back."
He doesn't give me a chance to reply before walking out the door. Shit! I've really screwed this up.
Jessa,
This is a backup letter. I tried to plan for every possible situation. If you're reading this letter, I'm so sorry. I was hoping this one wouldn't be necessary. Ever.
So, you saw Jeff. I'm not sure where you are but please, whatever you do, don't let it ruin your trip. Don't let his presence taint the beautiful journey you're on. Hopefully, and I'm assuming so if you're reading, Jackson is still with you. Let him take care of you, Jessa. Talk to him. He'll listen. He'll be there for you. He cares, I'm sure of it.
If nothing else, remember this... Jeff is a loser. He screwed up, not you. You didn't do anything wrong. You didn't stick his dick in someone else. He did that. He's the one that threw away your future together. And you know what? It's a damn good thing he did. If he hadn't, you wouldn't be where you are today.
Today you are happy. I'm not even there with you, and I know you're happy.
He's not worth the tears, or vodka, or wine, or whatever you're drowning yourself in. He's not.
Love you,
Amber
Damn her again! There needs to be an award for the best, best friend in the world. She would win it by a long shot. My instinct tells me to run to Jackson, apologize for acting the way I have been the last few days and attempt to make it up to him. Knowing he'll be back shortly, I call Amber instead.
"Hey! How's the sunshine?" she asks as soon as she picks up.
"It's gorgeous. You should convince the hubs to take you here."
"Me and the kids?"
"Um, no. Just you. Find someone to watch the kids."
"Are you volunteering?"
"Nope. I know better. I wouldn't be able to handle it. Plus, you would freak out the second I didn't answer my phone when you called. That's what grandparents are for." Truth be told, I don't want to be stuck with three kids for more than a few hours. Especially not Amber's kids. I love them to death, but they are way more than I can handle. There's too much energy in each of them. Put them all together and I'd be pulling my hair out before she's on the plane.
"So did you open my letter yet?" she asks.
"I did. What exactly did Jackson tell you?" For the love of all things holy, please say he told you enough that I don't have to rehash it with you.
"All he said was that you ran into Jeff. Shit! Sorry, I wasn't going to say his name. I know it bothers you."
"It’s fine, Amber. Honestly, running into him sucked, but I think I may be over it now."
"Tequila helps you forget a lot."
"Not funny. I'm out of the deep end, heading toward the shore. Promise."
"Then why are you calling? If everything is better, you should be out enjoying your vacation with Mr. Playboy." I can hear her smirking on the other end of the line as she speaks.
"Funny, Amber. Real funny. Did you call him that the other night when you talked to him? I bet you didn't. I bet you thought of it and chickened out."
"Damn straight I chickened out."
"Oh, my God, woman. You crack me up," I reply, laughing into the phone. "I miss you."
"I miss you, too. How much longer is this trip lasting? I need some bestie time, preferably at the spa."
"A few months. We're here for another week or so, and then we leave for Paris."
"Do you think Jackson would trade places with me? I'll go to Paris with you, and he can come back here and play mom and wife for a few weeks?" There's hope in her voice but at the same time, I can tell she's joking. We both know Jackson would never swap places with her, not even for one day. Especially if it meant giving up a trip to Paris.
"I'll make sure to ask him when he gets back."
"Ah, he listens well. He left you alone just like I told him to."
"He does."
"You're falling for him, aren't you, Jessa?"
"Why do you say that?" I clear my throat to try to cover my surprise.
"When I first suggested that he go on the trip with you, I thought you were going to kill me. You were upset and shocked and thrilled all at the same time. Now, I hear a different side of you when I talk to you. You sound happy for the first time in a long time. Happiness is all I hear, even when you call because you opened one of my letters. I know those aren't making you happy. They may be helping fix whatever situation you are in, but they don't make you happy. He does. He's the reason you're smiling right now. That's how I know you're falling for him."
My smile fades as her voice trails off. How she knows so much from so far away scares me a little. She's not wrong, though. I am falling for him. I have been for a while. Even my best efforts can't seem to keep me from thinking about him day and night. The last few days have been rough, to say the least, yet he hasn't run. He's been here by my side, attempting to help me move past Jeff. He's been wonderful, and I've been an annoying drunk, ruining our vacation.
Time to change that.
"You're right, like always. I hope he realizes it."
"He does, Jessa. He does. Trust me."
Chapter 6
Jackson returns shortly after I hang up with Amber. Treading lightly, he asks if I'm still interested in snorkeling. I am, so we change and head out.
"I'm sorry," I say as we climb in the hotel shuttle.
"You don't need to apologize, Jessa. When I figured out who he was, I knew it was going to be a rough couple of days for you. If you had brushed it off, I would have been worried. It was when you didn't slow down that I got worried. I'm the one who should be apologizing. I stole your phone and called Amber. At the time, I didn't think about it, but I invaded your privacy and basically tattled on you to your best friend."
Taking his hand in mine, "Thank you for that. She was the right person to call."
"Will I ever be able to read the letter she wrote you?"
"Someday, but not now. Maybe after our trip is over, if you still want to, you can read them then. They're not personal; they just won't make much sense to you. She knows me, knows what I need to hear, that's all. Don't you have a friend like that? Someone you can call anytime and they'll tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear?"
"I used to."
"What happened?"
"He stole my fiancé."
Um... how has this not come up yet? Do I pry or let it go? My curiosity it piqued.
"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask, squeezing his hand gently so he knows I'm here for support.
"Not really. It was a long time ago and I'm over it."
"Okay. If you ever want to, I'm here."
"I know that. I'm sure we'll talk about it eventually, but not right now. Right now, I want to look at beautiful fish and enjoy the water. I don't want my past to ruin what could turn out to be a perfect day."
"I totally understand." Pausing, I'm not sure how to move past the tension that's built up in the van. "What are we doing after we're done snorkeling?"
"You are going to the spa while I take care of a few things."
"I am?" Shit! Again, not budgeted in.
"Yeah. I figured, since I have to work for a few hours, I would pamper you so you'll think about me while I'm away. Can you handle that?"
Rolling my eyes and making sure he notices, I shake my head at him. "I think I can pull my big girl panties up for a few hours of pampering."
"Just make sure you’re prepared to lose those panties when you get back to the room," he whispers in my ear as the van pulls to an abrupt halt, forcing our bodies to collide.
#15 Go snorkeling
I can honestly say that snorkeling is one of the most amazing things I've ever done. The reef was amazing. The water was crystal clear. There were fish and sea turtles swimming so close it made me nervous at first. My favorite part was a group of dolphins that wanted to play with us.
&n
bsp; We would have been down longer, but there had been sharks in the area recently. I'm glad they didn't tell us that until after we were back on the boat. Knowing me, I would never have jumped into the water had I known.
When we returned to the hotel, Jackson grabbed us a couple drinks and some lunch. Sitting on the patio to our room, we enjoyed lunch and a quick conversation before my spa appointment. He booked me an hour massage, facial, and mani-pedi. I was going to be spending most of the afternoon away from him.
The spa seemed slow when I arrived, so I asked the receptionist what other services they offered. Looking through the brochure, I decided to splurge and have a few other things added to my day, charging my new services to the room, instead of Jackson's credit card. He's in for a surprise when I return later.
Note for next time: have all waxing procedures done before you have a relaxing massage.
Calm, cool and collected, I return to the room to find Jackson pacing back and forth, still on his phone. He spots me, smiles, and holds up his hand, letting me know he'll be done in five minutes.
"Look, Josh, we need to wrap this up... Yes, make the adjustments to the calendar and email them to me, the inventory should be fine. If you need to order something, make sure you run it by me… Call Greg, he'll be able to come in and take a look at the sound system… Yep. Sounds good… A while. I don't know how long. It’s going to be a few months. You said you'd be able to handle things until I get back. Call me if you need anything else… Yes, I'll call again next week... All right, later."
He sounds so professional, in charge, and bossy. It's turning me on. Then I think about the state my private area is in. I'm hoping the bright red has faded since the pain has turned into numbness.
"How was your massage?" Jackson asks, tossing his phone on the couch as he approaches.
"Good. I have a little surprise for you."
"Oh yeah?"
"Just a little something to say thank you for the amazing afternoon I just had."
"I'm looking forward to the amazing evening we're about to have," he says, placing his hands on my hips, pulling me forward into his body.
Chasing Fate Page 5
