Before the two of them reached the steps, Tanner appeared in the doorway. “Where are you two headed?”
Tucker felt the old resentment sneak through him. Tanner playing father. First to him, then to Shawn. But Shawn was eighteen now. If he wanted to go somewhere with his father, what business was it of Tanner’s?
“We’re headed to the city to find Dad a car,” Shawn announced and smiled at Tucker.
“Or truck,” Tucker added. He noticed Tanner’s eyebrows had gone up.
“If that’s what you want, Tucker,” Tanner told him. “Good luck. By the way, Davis Auto in the city is one of the best, we’ve found. Gene will cut you a good deal.”
Tucker nodded. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
Once they were in the pickup and on their way, Shawn turned to Tucker. “Any idea what you’re looking for?”
Tucker thought of Paige’s brother’s fancy sports car. It might be nice, but it wasn’t something he’d be comfortable with. “I don’t know,” he answered as honestly as he could. “Maybe I’ll know it when I see it.”
“A pickup?” Shawn asked. “You mentioned that. Do you think you’ll be hauling stuff, like at the Rocking O?”
Tucker wondered if Shawn was trying to find out if he planned to stay at the ranch.
“No, no pickup,” he answered. “And I’m not sure about a car, either.”
“Then what about an SUV?”
Tucker considered it. “Well, that would solve the need of having a bit of hauling space.”
“Sure, plenty of room for stuff or people. And if you’re smart and can afford it, you’ll go green.”
“Green?”
“Yeah, like with a hybrid or a crossover.”
Tucker suddenly wished he’d done some research before just taking off with nothing specific in mind. He’d been out of the mainstream of life for so long, he wasn’t familiar with all the newer things going on. “Green meaning ecological, you mean?”
“That’s it!”
Tucker hoped Shawn knew more about all this than he did. But then it didn’t really matter, as long as they could find a vehicle to get him wherever he would be going in a few weeks. That’s all he really cared about when it came to transportation.
“I heard you helped with the prom decorations,” Shawn said a few minutes later.
“Not really,” Tucker answered. “By the time I got there, most everything was done.” He didn’t want his son to know that he’d purposely gotten there late. After surprising Paige with a kiss he hadn’t planned, he’d decided it’d be better if he left. It had started out innocent enough, but he knew by Paige’s reaction that he’d stepped over the line. Way over.
“I’m glad you brought your date by for pictures,” he said, changing the subject. “She’s a pretty girl.”
“Laney and I have been friends since grade school,” Shawn answered, chuckling. “If someone had told me even two years ago that I’d take her to our senior prom, I’d have laughed.”
“I guess people change, but if you’re around them every day, you don’t see it.”
“Maybe.” Shawn was quiet for a moment. “Your leg is better, isn’t it?”
Tucker glanced at him, then returned his attention to the road ahead. “It’s definitely stronger than it was when I came here.”
“You’ve been seeing the doctor, then,” Shawn said, his voice quiet. “Dr. Miles.”
The last thing Tucker wanted to do was to tell everyone what he was doing. His biggest fear had been that he’d let his family down and wouldn’t succeed with the therapy. But things were turning out a lot different than he’d thought they might. Maybe it was okay if he admitted that Paige was helping.
“She’s been overseeing my physical therapy, yes,” he answered.
“She’s nice.”
“Yes.”
“And you kind of like her, don’t you?”
For a second, Tucker held his breath. He already knew Jules liked trying her hand at matchmaking, but his son? “Like you said, she’s nice,” he answered. “She didn’t have to help me, but she did.”
“Then why haven’t you asked her out?”
Tucker took his eyes off the road to stare at his son. “A date?”
“Sure,” Shawn answered. “Why not? I mean, she’s nice. You like her.”
For a brief second, Tucker wondered if taking her to dinner would be a good way to thank her for her help. It was quickly replaced by the memory of the kiss in the old orchard, and he knew that dinner or anything else would be a bad idea. He’d come to like her too much. Way too much, and it was time to put some solid space between them, before he started thinking things he shouldn’t. He didn’t have any business getting involved with anyone.
“Just think about it, okay?” Shawn asked.
Tucker wished he could stop thinking about it, but it wasn’t easy, even as they looked at vehicles and eventually bought one at the dealership Tanner had suggested. When he could keep his mind off Paige, it was a miracle.
When he arrived at his next appointment a few days later, he sensed things were a bit strained between them, and he mentally kicked himself for it.
“Did you hear that I finally got a car?” he asked her as he settled on the examining table. “Shawn helped me pick it out. It’s a hybrid SUV.”
“I’m glad you have your own transportation. How’s your leg and knee feeling?” she asked, approaching him with the calipers.
“Good,” he answered, noticing she hadn’t looked directly at him since he’d first walked into the clinic.
“Let’s get the measurements then.” She quickly finished the task and stepped back. “You’re doing some walking, right?”
“That’s what you told me to do last week. Is something wrong?”
“No, nothing,” she said, finally meeting his gaze for a brief moment. “Are you still using your cane?”
“Sometimes,” he admitted. “It was so much a part of me—”
“It’s time to get rid of it,” she said quickly. “You’re still depending on it and really don’t need it.”
Tucker stared at her. “Okay, if you say so.”
She nodded. “Keep up the exercises, and I’ll see you next week at the same time.”
When she turned and walked to the door, then gave him a polite smile, he wasn’t sure what to think. It had only been a kiss. Under the mistletoe. It wasn’t as if he’d had his hands all over her or— He shook his head as he moved off the table. She was angry, and maybe she had a right to be. He’d probably been out of line. It had been so long since he’d been that close to a woman— But he’d learned his lesson, and he sure wasn’t going to do it again.
“Next week, then,” he said, and left, feeling like a kid who’d been caught with his hand in the cookie jar.
PAIGE STEPPED INSIDE the big round-topped metal building at the Rocking O Ranch where the senior class party was being held. She’d been tempted to make an excuse and stay home, but she didn’t want to do that to her friends. The O’Briens had been more than kind since she’d arrived in Desperation, and she owed them and others more than avoiding an event that certainly wouldn’t kill her to attend.
“There you are,” Jules called to her. “We saved you a seat.”
“In the back of the building?” Paige teased when she reached her friend. “Just what kind of chaperone are you?”
“The kind who knows her place,” Jules answered with a wink.
Paige looked around the dim building, where crepe paper streamers and balloons decorated the walls and the metal girders of the ceiling. “Where is everyone?”
“The men are out tending the barbecue pit. Trish is keeping watch over the punch and soft drinks. Bridey is keeping the salad bar filled, and Kate is inside putting the last touches on the dessert.”
“So what can I do?” Paige asked, feeling badly that she hadn’t arrived earlier. “If I’d known there was so much to be done—”
“Don’t worry about it,” Jules told he
r and pointed to the chair next to her. “There are always more people than we need at these kind of things.”
Paige nodded as the rest of the O’Briens and their friends began drifting to the table.
Dusty was the first to reach one of the empty chairs and pretended to collapse in it. “I really thought I loved smoking meat, but now that I’ve smoked enough for a herd of elephants, I think I’ll retire.”
“They’re growing kids,” Trish said, as she joined them. “But I agree, at least as far as the potato salad goes. If I have to peel one more potato, the peeler may become designated as a weapon.”
Paige was aware when Tucker was the last of the group to return. She’d noticed he rarely seemed comfortable when his family—especially Tanner—was around. Tucker was so different than she was. Although she and Garrett lived a long way from their parents, who lived in a suburb of Chicago, they were a close family. She was sorry Tucker hadn’t had the same kind of experience.
A bright bluish white light swung through the building toward the table where the adults were sitting, and Paige shaded her eyes with her hand, trying to see where the light was coming from.
Jules leaned closer. “One of the boys borrowed a few of the spotlights from the school theater. I guess they’re putting us in the spot, so to speak, although I don’t know why.”
“I’m sure we’ll know soon,” Paige said, as she watched one of the students step up onto a makeshift platform, holding a microphone.
“Yes, those are our chaperones,” the young man announced as the spotlight swept back and forth across the table in the back. “Hi, there, O’Briens and friends.”
Nearly everyone at the table answered.
“We have you in the spotlight,” he continued, “because we want to thank you for sponsoring this party tonight, our class’s last high school party, and for giving us a place to have it.” He waited until the applause from the young people died down. “We weren’t sure what we could do for a special thank-you that you’d remember, but one of the parents came up with an idea. We hope you like it.”
Strains of an old slow dance song came from the enormous speakers at the corners of the platform, while another young man took the microphone from the first one. “We had some trouble finding the right music, but we hope you’ll all enjoy dancing to this one, because, well, this one’s for you.”
As the spotlight dimmed, Tanner stood and helped Jules from her chair, and she turned to the others at the table. “This is for everyone, not just the two of us. Dusty? You and Kate come on. Trish, Paige, don’t be shy.”
Paige watched as they all slowly began to drift to the dance floor, while trying to ignore that she and Tucker were the only ones left at the table. Wishing she could disappear, she moved to leave the table, thinking a trip to refill her glass of soda was the best idea, but she wasn’t able to complete her escape.
“Dad,” Shawn said, approaching their table, “it’s time to try a new exercise. I’m sure Dr. Paige won’t mind helping you with this one, will you, Dr. Paige?”
Paige opened her mouth to beg off, but knew it would do no good. Shawn wasn’t going to let her escape, nor was he going to let his father get away with not dancing.
“Paige?” Tucker asked, standing and holding out his hand to her. “I don’t see any way we can get out of this, so we might as well make the best of it.”
Nodding, she took his hand. “You’re right.”
He led her to the edge of what had become the dance floor, and then turned her in his arms. “I promise I’ll behave,” he said with a wry smile.
Unsure of how to reply, she said nothing.
Taking a deep breath, he let it out slowly. “I might as well admit that it’s been a long time, so you’ll have to bear with me.”
“For me, too,” Paige admitted, without looking up and into his eyes.
They moved together, swaying to the soft, melodic and well-known song, and it wasn’t long before Paige relaxed and began to enjoy the dance.
“He’s a good kid,” Tucker said. “I guess I have my brother to thank for that. I don’t suppose it was easy for him, but he’s not the kind of man to turn his back on family.”
Paige looked at him and saw that he was watching Shawn, who stood with the girl he’d been seeing and several other couples. The group seemed to enjoy watching the chaperones dance, and she smiled. When she glanced up at Tucker, love and pride shined in his eyes, but she also saw something else.
“What is it, Tucker?” she asked, without thinking.
His smile was sad as he continued to watch the group, and his voice was soft when he answered. “I’m proud of some of the things I’ve done, especially after I joined the marines. But when I see Shawn and realize how much I missed, not only of his life, but of having and doing the things most teenagers experience, I sometimes wish I could redo my life after I left here.”
“I can understand how you might feel,” she answered.
He turned to look at her. “Can you?”
“I think everyone can, at least about some things.”
“I suppose.”
But she suspected he didn’t understand, so she did what she could to explain. “We make choices every day, every minute of every day. Sometimes they’re small, like choosing to get out of bed…or not, and sometimes they’re big and life-changing. Sometimes we believe they’re right, and they can be.” She thought of her own life, of her teen years when she’d begun the big focus on a medical career. Looking back, she realized now how that choice had left her with little time for her friends, who finally drifted away, and even less time for boyfriends.
“The past is behind us,” she thought aloud. “What we need to remember is that we can make the best of the present and the future, if we try.”
The music began to fade, and the dancers around them were slowing. Tucker slowly came to a stop, one hand still around her waist, the other holding her hand, as he looked out over the crowd in the room. “Maybe. I just wish I knew how.”
Before she could answer, a loud blast of music filled the room, and the two of them followed the others who were hurrying back to the table.
“That was nice of them,” Jules said, taking her seat at the table.
“It was,” Kate agreed as she settled on her own chair. “You know, I don’t believe Dusty and I have danced since our wedding.”
Dusty leaned forward as he helped her scoot her chair closer to the table. “Is that a hint?”
Kate laughed. “Only if you think it should be.”
Talk turned to the past, a time before Paige had arrived in town, and she listened with interest, as she always did. And she noticed that Tucker, too, seemed to be listening. But every now and then, he’d look toward the teenagers with that same sad, wistful look on his face. And she didn’t know how she could help him begin to look to the future, instead of dwelling on the mistakes of the past.
TUCKER LEANED his folded arms against the corral fence, the past reaching out to grab him. Throughout his adult life, he’d tried to forget everything that had happened before he’d joined the marines. He never succeeded. And now it all poured over him as memories swirled in his mind.
As far back as he could remember he’d wanted to be a bull rider like his dad. Nothing and no one could stop his determination. When he was ten, they owned two bulls. He’d managed a few times to climb onto Wooly Bully, the tamer of the two, but it was Macho Man, a mean crossbreed of unknown lineage, that he wanted to ride. He refused to give up and finally managed to coax and lead the bull into the corral from the pasture, then proceeded to jump on the animal’s back from the top rail of the fence. The ride, what there was of it, was something he’d never forget. So was the paddling he’d gotten from his dad, who just happened to be home between rodeos.
But he’d also seen the pride in his father’s eyes that he’d been smart enough and brave enough to do the deed. Even Tanner, at thirteen, had been impressed, whispering congratulations as their dad walked toward the ho
use.
But when Brody died at a faraway rodeo, life at the Rocking O changed. Looking back, he realized how much they all had changed, for better and for worse.
When the sound of a vehicle could be heard coming up the drive, he was pulled from his memories and turned to see who it was. The thirty-year-old restored Mustang meant Shawn’s friend Ryan had stopped by.
“Hey, Mr. O’Brien,” Ryan called to him, waving, as he walked up to the house.
Shoving away from the fence, Tucker greeted him, and then walked around the house to the back patio. He always enjoyed spending a few minutes there in the morning, before checking to see if he could help with chores. Sometimes Jules would join him, but today he could hear her behind him in the house, talking to Shawn and Ryan.
“There’s orange juice, if you’d like some, Ryan,” Tucker heard her say. “Shawn, sit down and stop pacing. Your uncle will be here in a minute.”
“Yeah, Shawn,” Ryan said. “I’m sure he’ll say it’ll be okay.”
“Don’t bet on,” Shawn replied. “You know how he’s always been. If it wasn’t for Jules— Everything was fine, and now it’s like it was before.”
“You know how your uncle feels about parties that aren’t chaperoned, Shawn,” Jules said. “It isn’t that he doesn’t—”
“It’s the rule,” Tanner said, walking into the room.
Tucker shook his head. How many times had he heard those same words? And they always meant an end to the discussion.
“It’s a special occasion,” Shawn pointed out. “An after-graduation party.”
“With drinking and all the rest?” Tanner said. “No, you don’t have to answer that. I already know.”
“But I don’t do that!”
Tucker got to his feet and turned toward the house. Opening the door, he stepped inside and looked around. Jules, usually the calm one, glanced at him with a worried frown. Tanner wore his “what I say goes” look, while Shawn had crossed his arms, his stubborn expression saying it all. Ryan looked as if he was ready to bolt, but afraid he’d be caught in the act.
“What’s this about a party?” Tucker asked.
Shawn turned to look at Tanner, then focused on Tucker. “A bunch of us—most of the class—decided to have a party out at Parson’s Creek after graduation.”
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