Jen inhales slowly. “I’m scared,” she says.
“Of what?” I ask. “Of me?”
“No, not... you. Of us.”
I shift closer. “Why?”
“Because I cared about you so much back then,” she says, her eyes falling to the floor between us. “And when it was over, I... I’ve never hurt so much in my life. I don’t think I ever got over it and I don’t want to feel that again. Ever.”
“You won’t,” I say.
“You can’t know that for sure.”
“Jenny, I know what I want. I don’t do indecisive. I don’t do angsty bullshit. When I say I’d like to spend the rest of my life with you, I mean it. You don’t have to worry about me breaking your heart because that’s not going to happen. You were my first love,” I say. “My only love. Remember?”
She nods silently.
“I will do anything to prove that to you,” I say. “I…”
My voice fades as epiphany strikes.
I drop to one knee in front of her. Jen looks down, her eyes big and wide, as I reach out and take her hand.
“Marry me,” I say.
Her jaw drops. “What?”
“Marry me, Jenny,” I say. “Let’s just do it.”
“Just do it?”
“I don’t want to spend another day without you as my wife again.”
She blinks. “Oh, you really mean just do it.”
“Yes.”
“Like... today?”
I nod. “Yes.”
She scowls, digging lines into her forehead. “Are you crazy?”
“We did it before.”
“Yeah, and we were crazy!” She tries to pull her hand away but I tighten my grip. “Graham, we can’t just up and get married again just because the idea popped into your head.”
“Yes, we can.”
“But then, what?” she asks.
“Then...” I raise a brow in confusion, “we’ll be married?”
“No shit, Graham! What happens next?!”
I wave a hand. “We’ll figure that out—”
“Where will we live?” she asks. “I have a job in Colorado. You have a job... wherever the hell it is you work. Where are you going after Toronto?”
“I don’t know.” I shrug as I think. “Miami, I think? Have to check with Paige. Pack a bikini and come with. It’ll be fun.”
“But what about my job? My life? My—my—”
“Quit.”
She’s taken aback. “Excuse me?”
“Quit,” I repeat.
“My job or my life?”
“Both.”
She sputters for a second. “I have a lease!”
“Break it.”
“I’ll lose my security deposit!”
I gesture around the room. “I don’t know, Jen. Something tells me we’ll get by.”
Her lips twitch but she forces them down. “This isn’t funny, Graham!”
“I’m not joking, Jen.” I rise off my knee to stand before her. “Don’t tell me you actually want to be a food critic for some nothing local paper.”
She hesitates. “Okay, it’s not exactly the dream, but—”
“Ditch it! Hit the road with me.” I talk fast, feeling the pieces fall into place with every word. “I’ll work. You’ll play. We’ll spend every moment in-between together and we’ll start over again — the way it should have been.”
“Graham—”
“You can see the sights you always wanted to see,” I say over her. “Go where you always wanted to go. It’ll be great!”
“Exactly what part of this isn’t supposed to sound crazy again?” she deadpans.
I step forward, grabbing her by the hips before she has a chance to step back. “Remember that summer we worked the desk together?” I ask. “All you ever talked about was getting out of here. Seeing the world. Writing travel books. Now’s your chance, Jen. Come with me.”
Her fingers tremble in my palms. “But...”
“But what?” I ask. “Show me the problem and point me at it.”
“That’s my dream, Graham,” she says. “What about yours?”
I pause, but not for long. “You are my dream, Jen.”
Her head tilts. “Come on. Be serious.”
“I am.” I cup her face, forcing her eyes to stay with mine. “I’ve never been happier than when I was with you. I’ve spent all these years bouncing from place-to-place because I couldn’t stand the idea of coming home every night to an empty house. And I wasn’t about to fill it with some other woman because, honestly, none of them compare to you. No one’s ever made me feel the way you do.”
“What about the Botsford legacy?” she asks. “If I recall, your mother definitely used the phrase an heir, a spare, and a few more over there at least once in my company.”
I shrug a shoulder. “Still plenty of time.”
She snorts. “Only if you expect my uterus to resemble a clown car for the remainder of my fertile years.”
I cringe at the visual image. “Jen, as far as I’m concerned; your clown car, your choice. I would love to be a dad but I’ll be a one-and-done dad if that’s what you want. Also, I have three brothers. At least one of them will pick up the slack when it comes to the Botsford legacy… if they haven’t already. Who the hell knows what Hayden’s been up to.”
She chuckles, her smile digging in a little deeper.
I brush her cheek with my thumb and I whisper, “More than anything, I want you. Nothing else matters. Let me love you again and I promise you I’ll never stop.”
Jen exhales slowly and her shoulders sag. “Ah, hell…” she mutters.
“What?” I ask.
Her hand wraps around my tie. “Just shut the fuck up already.”
She pulls me down and kisses me on the mouth. I wrap my arms around her without hesitation, embracing her even closer while my lips run wild with hers.
“Is that a yes?” I ask, our bodies entwined. “Hard to tell with you…”
Jen laughs. “It’s a we’ll talk about it.”
“Okay.” I smile and take hold of her hand again. “We’ll talk.”
I twist toward the door, yanking Jen along with me.
“Graham—”
I grab the bouquet off the table and throw open the door.
“What are you doing?”
I bound toward Ira’s door and knock twice before crossing over to bang on Jonah’s door, too.
After a few seconds, Ira’s door opens. He pokes his head out with squinting eyes and Hayden’s slinks out beside him.
“What?” Ira spits.
I keep my grip on Jen’s hand. “You guys wanna witness a wedding?” I ask him.
Jen flinches. “I’m sorry, what?”
“Again?” Hayden asks.
“Meet us downstairs.” I point at Hayden. “Scarlet’s looking for you, by the way.”
“Yeah, I know,” he says. “Why do you think I’m hiding out in here?”
“Graham!” Jen tries to pry her hand away but I keep it close. “Graham, talk. I said we’d talk about it!”
“Right,” I say with a nod. “You’ve got about five minutes. Say what you need to say, Jenny.”
A door opens down the hall and Jonah appears in nothing but his boxers. “Some of us are trying to sleep, you know,” he says.
I smile and pull Jen toward the elevators. “Throw on some pants, Jo, the others will explain. Meet us in the lobby. Oh—!” I turn my head back. “And bring your guitar!”
He looks at the others. “What’s going on?”
Hayden sighs. “They’re getting hitched.”
“Again?”
I slap the call button while Jen continues to try and get loose from my hand.
“Graham—” The elevator doors slide open and I step on, easily taking her with me. “Graham, wait. I can’t get married on my sister’s wedding day—”
“Then, why did she give you these?” I ask, whipping up the flowers.
She p
auses, her brow rising. “Well…”
I drop them into her other hand. “I love you, Jen. Do you remember the first time I said that?”
“Of course… On the roof.”
“It was right after the first time we made love.” I nod, thinking back. “Five in the morning.”
“Six,” she corrects.
I squint. “You sure?”
“Fifteen past, to be more specific.” The doors slide closed, locking us inside, and she smiles. “You held me real close and… Jenny, I love you. Just slipped out like you didn’t even mean to say it.”
I release her hand and reach out to hit the lobby button.
“I did mean it, though,” I say. “And every other time I said it afterward.”
The car lurches, beginning its slow descent downward.
“What about you?” she asks. “Do you remember the first time I said it?”
“You mean the only time?” I quip. “Of course. Right after our wedding, I picked you up and walked you across the lobby downstairs. We got on the elevator — this very elevator — and you leaned in and right as the doors closed… I love you, Graham.”
Jen bites her lip, holding back tears.
“I remember… goosebumps.” I smile. “A million goosebumps rolling down my back. You’d never said it before and it destroyed me in the best way possible.”
Jen stands still, her chest rising and falling with the rapid tempo of her breath.
“I love you,” I say. “Whether we get married today or tomorrow or next week or next year, that’s never going to change. I love you as much in this elevator right now as I did standing here ten years ago and I’m gonna love you this much ten years from now, too. So, now…” I take a second to admire her, breathing in every detail of this moment. “You know where I stand. What say you, Jen? Are we getting married or not?”
She holds her breath, barely moving as a rush of panic fills her eyes.
Honestly, I can’t say I blame her. In the span of a few minutes, I’ve proposed marriage, urged her to quit her job, leave her home, and completely uproot her life just to be with me. It’s the most selfish thing I’ve ever done but I’ll fucking own that if I have to. I’ll wear the crown for Most Selfish Bastard if it means taking her to bed with me every night until the day I die. I’ll give her everything; the whole wide world if I meant she’d be my queen again.
Finally, she sighs.
“Never fall for a Botsford boy,” she says. “He’ll break your heart.”
I frown. “What?”
“That’s what my father told me.”
“And you believed him?”
“He wasn’t wrong… until he was.”
I step closer, raising my hands to cup her face. “I love you, Jennifer Parker,” I whisper.
Jen smiles. “I love you, Graham Botsford.” A tear rolls down her cheek. “I trust you. From now ‘til the day I die, I belong to you—”
I crush my mouth on hers, sealing our lips in a delicate, firm kiss.
The elevator stops and the doors slide open but I refuse to release her yet. I hold her close, my lips drifting from hers to the tip of her nose to her forehead.
“I love you,” I say again.
Jen opens her eyes. “I love you, too,” she says, smiling wide.
A throat clears from the lobby.
I turn to look and my face falls as we both jolt away from each other.
“Hi, Daddy,” Jen says as she quickly wipes her mouth.
Jensen glares at me, his brow furrowed hard. His tie rests un-knotted around his shoulders, a dark red stain splashed along the front side. “May I have a word with you, Graham?” he asks, his voice stiff and cold.
I nod. “Of course, sir.”
Jen and I move to exit the elevator. I ease over to let her get off first and Jensen shoots forward before I can follow.
“Sixth floor, please,” he says, blocking the lobby.
I gulp as I glance over his shoulder at Jen’s pinched face outside.
“Sure,” I say, forcing myself to stand straight up. “No problem…”
I hit 6 on the wall and I hold my breath as the doors close.
Seventeen
Graham
The elevator lurches upward, somehow ascending far slower than usual.
I stare forward at the doors while the fires of hell itself begin to blister my right cheek. Jensen’s face shows in the reflective doors, his eyes targeting my face like a damn sniper.
Say something.
I clear my throat. “That’s a very nice suit, Mr—”
“Shut up.”
I nod. “Okay.”
We stand in silence. Every floor we pass makes the rock in my gut grow about three more sizes.
Jensen turns to face me, his jaw clenched. “I don’t like you, Graham.”
I hesitate. He stares. “Am I allowed to speak now, or…?”
“Don’t be a smart ass,” he says.
“Sorry,” I say. “It’s a defense mechanism.”
“Your father’s a jerk, too.”
“He’s not my favorite person, either.”
“Jen deserves better.”
“I couldn’t agree more, sir.”
His eyes slowly travel down my tie and back again as the doors open on the sixth floor. I obscure my flinch as he quickly steps off and takes a right turn down the hall.
I breathe out slowly and ease my head around the door. “So, are we cool?”
“Come with me.”
I sag and slide my hands into my pockets as I follow him out into the hallway. I pick up my pace to catch up, making sure to stay behind him out of some semblance of respect while he fishes into his back pocket for his room key.
“Mr. Parker—”
“Shut up,” he says, stopping in front of a door.
“Yes, sir,” I say. “But I would very much like to address what you saw downstairs.” I point down. “You know, on the elevator.”
He lets out a growl and shoves his door open. I linger outside in the hallway as he disappears into his suite.
“So...” I prop the door open with my foot. “Jen and I have... I guess you can say reconciled.” I pause for a reaction but he gives me nothing as he rifles through his suitcase somewhere in the dark. “But I can assure you, sir, that I adore your daughter — very much — and I will do everything in my power to take care of her—”
“You understand her.”
I startle as he appears in the doorframe. “I’m sorry?” I ask.
“Jen said that you understand her,” he says.
I nod slowly. “Yeah, I’d say I do.”
He steps out with a new tie flung over his shoulders. I wait for him to pass by before I raise my foot and release the door.
“You love her,” he says.
I follow close behind him. “Yes, sir. Since the day I met her—”
“And she loves you.”
“I... I mean, she said she did, so—”
He stops ahead of me at the elevator. “And you think that’s all it takes to spend your life with somebody?”
I pause. “It’s a start, right?”
He smirks as the doors slide open. “It takes commitment.”
We step on. “I am committed,” I say.
“Then, where the hell have you been for ten years, Graham?”
“That…” I raise a finger as he taps for the lobby, “was not my fault. Jen—”
“Jen is not responsible for your actions,” he says over me.
“And I’m not responsible for hers. You don’t know the whole story.”
“I know enough.”
“No, you don’t.” I turn to face him. “What happened back then was a misunderstanding; one that I have spent every waking hour this weekend trying to rectify and you can be damn sure if I’d have done the same thing ten years ago if the truth had come out then. Now that it has, I’m going to make it right — with or without your blessing, though I’d greatly prefer it if I had it and so woul
d she.”
“I couldn’t agree more, Graham.”
I pause as he looks at me, that smirk still plastered along his mouth. “What?” I ask.
Jensen sighs. “My daughters mean the world to me but they stopped needing me a long time ago, especially Jen. She needs someone who can make her happy and…” he side-eyes me, “if that’s you, then that’s you. At least I don’t have to worry about her ending up on the street with a Botsford… unlike Clara…” He sighs. “You know anything about dairy farms?”
I blink. “Not at all, but… Baby C can always come to me for help. I’m sure she knows that.”
“Don’t push it, kid.”
“I’m just saying…”
The elevator lands at the bottom. The doors quickly slide open, revealing Jen in the lobby in the same spot we left her before, along with my three brothers lingering behind her.
She steps forward. “Hey,” she says, her eyes bouncing between us. “What’s, uh…?”
Jensen waves a hand. “Just a little man-to-man chat, honey.” He leans over and pecks her forehead. “That’s all.”
“That’s all?” she asks, looking just as worried.
“That’s all,” I say. I stand beside her, openly taking her hand. “Nothing to worry about.”
Jensen’s throat clears again as he fiddles with his tie. “I’m going back in,” he says. “Save a dance for me, all right, honey?”
Jen nods. “All right…”
He heads toward the ballroom again and Jen spins toward me.
“What the hell was that?” she asks.
I bring her hand to my lips, leaving a quick kiss along her knuckles. “He just wanted to make sure I was… committed.”
“Committed? Like, to a facility, or…?”
“To you,” I say, pulling her close. “And I am.”
She smiles. “That’s good to know.”
I lean in to kiss her and a throat clears beside us again.
“We doing this thing, or what?” Hayden asks.
I pause, still gazing into Jen’s eyes. “How about you, Jenny?” I whisper for only her ears. “Are you committed?”
Jen bites the tip of her tongue, teasing the moment for as long as possible. “Yes,” she finally says. “Let’s… just do it.”
Eighteen
Jen
Just a Touch: A Heartthrob Hotel Novella Page 13
