The back of my neck has always been one of my sweet spots, but Darby doesn’t know that yet.
“How long do you plan on blubbering for?” I ask Jocelyn, entering the room. I shift Darby from one arm to the other, and she claws my neck trying to get away from the entire situation.
“Calm down, baby,” I say gently into her ear. “No one’s gonna hurt me, alright? She was just playing a game, like I said. Tell her you were just playing a game.”
A fresh round of sobs bursts from somewhere inside of Jocelyn and I’m staring to rethink even taking her out of the damn ground. If this is a sign of what I’m going to have to deal with until I’m bored with this entire fucking scenario, then I might as well just drag her back outside and shove her in. Maybe she’ll save me some grief and break her neck on the way down.
The only problem with Jocelyn actually dying is that it’ll make me feel bad in a way. Not because I don’t think she doesn’t deserve it, but because I think it would make me look like a bad father if another one bites the dust.
Not that the other two were my fault for the most part, but like I said, there’s just something special about Jocelyn. Ideally, I’d like to keep her here in the house with me and Darby. I would love to watch her be a parent to her own child, but she’s already baring her teeth and it hasn’t even been an entire day.
Suddenly, Joce drops her hands from her face and looks up at us. She’s still crying and heartbroken or whatever, and I can tell that she’s trying her damnedest to stop crying.
“I’m sorry,” she begins in a strangled voice. “I was just playing a game and I got a little carried away.”
Darby shakes her head against my neck and grips me tighter. She doesn’t trust Jocelyn now and that’s something that they’ll have to work on if I decide that she’s going to stay up here with us.
At least she didn’t run off already like her bitch of a mother. One sign of weakness from me in Jocelyn’s room the first night I had her, and Laura was off like a shot. She didn’t give a good goddamn about her own kids. She only cared about getting away from us, and that’s why that bitch went out the way she did.
“I didn’t mean to make you cry,” Joce says softly. “Please forgive me.”
I grin at her as I rock Darby in my arms. There’s my fighter—slowly but surely, she’s starting to show herself again and it’s all because of the little girl in my arms.
“Okay,” Darbs sobs into my neck.
I roll my eyes and motion with my head for Jocelyn to come over to us.
“The only way this is going to work is if you two start getting along. You about ready for that?” I ask her when she’s a few feet away from us. She wipes the tears away from her eyes and nods.
“Alright,” I say, pulling Darby away from me and turning her around to face Jocelyn. “This is your big sister, baby. That’s how I know she was playing a game, because I’m her daddy too.”
Jocelyn sucks in a breath and gives me a horrified look as I smirk.
I really hope she didn’t think I was going to make it that fucking easy for her.
Supper’s finally on the table and we’ve moved to the dining room so we can eat comfortably. Darby is shooting questions at her Momma faster than she can answer them, but I’m actually content to see that they’re engaged in conversation finally.
Of course, she made her promise first to never try to hurt me again, and once that little deal was struck, the two of them became engrossed in each other.
Jocelyn asked her about her school and if she liked her teachers, and Darby told her that I keep her home and she gets her learning here instead of a school.
I take a sip of my wine as I watch the two of them. It really is like looking at the present and the past sitting across from each other. The same damn fire in their eyes, the same big brown eyes, and the same facial expressions. Hell, they even laugh the same way. If Darby were a little older, I’d take them both into my bedroom tonight, but she’s not ready for that just yet.
“Did Pater tell you that you used to have brothers too?” Jocelyn asks, resting her chin in her hand and smiling at Darby.
I slam my hand on the table and they both jump. When Joce looks at me, I give her a dangerous stare and shake my head slowly. She clears her throat and her eyes fall down to her plate.
“Who’s Pater?” Darby asks curiously, tilting her head first at Jocelyn, then at me.
Joce clears her throat but instead of answering her, she stabs a piece of pork and pops it into her mouth. She smiles and shakes her head.
“Never mind,” she replies once she’s done chewing. “I was just remembering a nightmare I had once and I got confused with what I was trying to say.”
“Okay,” Darby replies with a shrug as she drops her fork onto her plate. “Daddy? I have to use the bathroom.”
I nod and suck my teeth, before picking up my glass and taking another sip of wine. As Darby walks by me I smile at her and wait until she’s gone from the room before I turn my attention back to Jocelyn.
“Don’t you ever try that bullshit again, do you understand me? It’ll take next to nothing to throw you back into that fucking pit and this time, I’ll seal that lid forever,” I snap at her as quietly as I can. Darby has some kind of sonic hearing and if I’m too loud right now, I’m sure she’ll hear me from wherever the hell she is right now.
“I’m sorry,” Jocelyn says miserably for what seems like the millionth time in the past few hours. “I don’t know what she does and doesn’t know and I was just trying to talk to her.”
“Ask her about her studies, her favorite colors, or her favorite cartoons. Don’t ever bring up family again. The only family she needs to know about is the one at this table,” I reply evenly.
Jocelyn turns her eyes toward me and holds my stare for a moment. I can see the small flame starting to build and it’s making me hard.
“Why didn’t you tell her I was her mother?” she asks me quietly.
I reach down under the table to shift myself. I don’t want Darby to see this when she comes back. There will be plenty of time for that later.
“You’re not a stupid girl, so stop acting like one,” I respond with a smirk. “You want her to love you? To know who you really are? Then you’re gonna have to stay above ground long enough to earn that. Shit doesn’t get handed out in this house, you know that. Anything you want comes from being good and working hard.”
“And does she have to work hard for everything she has so far?” she asks in a low, dangerous tone.
I throw my head back and laugh. Now this is the girl that I grew to love so many years ago. This is the girl that tried to send her brothers away from my house and this is the girl that’ll do what I want her to do in order to try and do the same for Darby.
I drop my arms on the table and cross them, leaning forward and shaking my head.
“How old were you the first time I had you? Nine? Ten? Come on, Joce. You should know better; the kid is too young for me right now. Besides, she won’t be able to take everything I have to offer, not until she’s older and much deeper where I need her to be. I don’t like my pussy to be too tight or too young.”
“What’s her name?” she asks thoughtfully after a moment.
“Darby,” I reply with a smile. “Why?”
Jocelyn shrugs, “No reason other than a mother wanting to know her child’s name.”
“But you’re not her mother,” I remind her. “As of right now, you’re just her sister that she never met before today.”
Before Jocelyn has a chance to throw some more bullshit banter my way, Darby reenters the room and climbs back into her seat. She smiles at Jocelyn as she picks up her fork and keeps eating.
I’m not entirely sure if I’ll pull the hood off of her head anytime soon and tell her who the lady across from her is. Mostly because I won’t know how to explain why I lied to her, but maybe she’ll be okay with it when the time comes.
Maybe she won’t.
All I
know is that the reason Jocelyn is here right now in this very house is to keep my dick satisfied until I’m ready for Darby to take her place. Hopefully she’ll keep her fucking mouth shut on matters that she shouldn’t speak about long enough to keep my baby girl pure for a little while longer.
I sure would hate to break with tradition before the time is right all because of a mouthy bitch that doesn’t know her place.
We’ve finished supper and Darby is eating some dessert while Joce picks up the mess. I’ve invited her to come back into the dining room with us when she’s done and have some of the pie that I made yesterday. She knows that I like a spotless home, so she’ll do her best to pass inspection and be able to spend more time with Darby.
Twenty more minutes go by before Jocelyn reappears, clearing her throat in the doorway of the dining room. I lean over and give Darbs a kiss on the cheek, before getting up and walking past my oldest.
She follows closely behind me without me having to tell her to do so and I can’t help but be proud of her right now for that little show of submission. It seems like my girl is starting to remember the law of the land and that’s something I can definitely appreciate.
Once we enter the kitchen, I take a quick walk around to make sure that everything is as it should be—to my liking.
“You did a good job, kid,” I say with a nod as I inspect the sink. “Very nice. Why don’t you grab some pie and come back into the dining room? I’m sure Darby would like to get to know more about you.”
“Thank you, Pater,” she says softly as I walk past her on the way back into the dining room. I stop for a moment, my eyes lingering on her and grin. It’s enough for her to know that I acknowledge her and yet, by not verbally saying anything in return, reminds her that I’m the one in charge here.
Darby is peeking out the window when I walk into the dining room. With a sigh, I walk over, pull her hand off the curtain, and spin her back toward her chair.
“Sit down. Be a good girl for me,” I say to her quietly.
She gives me her infamous “I’m a big girl” pout before she finally does as she’s told. I can always counter that look with a stare and that’s when she knows I mean business.
She climbs into her chair and crosses her arms over her chest, pout still prominent, and a humph noise to punctuate it.
I can’t help but laugh because I’ve seen that same face and gesture done by her momma plenty of times before.
“Hey, I have an idea,” I say to her as I sit down at the head of the table. “Why don’t you ask the lady what her name is when she comes back? I’m sure that would make her smile.”
“I don’t wanna,” she huffs.
“Darby, that’s one,” I say to her holding up a warning finger.
She bounces her arms against her chest one more time before she drops her hands to the table. I watch as she picks up her fork and begins poking at her pie.
Who’s bright idea was it to have kids? I think, rolling my eyes. If I’m being honest, I think I would have been perfectly happy living my entire life alone, but shit happens, and some pussy is too good to pass up. I turn my eyes toward Jocelyn when she renters the room with a small plate in her hand.
She takes a seat across from Darby, who I’m now watching. She knows better than to not do as I tell her, and even though I don’t want to have to spank her over something so trivial, I will.
Darby steals a glance in my direction before she sighs and puts her fork down, dropping her chin in her hands and looks at Jocelyn.
“So what’s your name?” she asks her.
I nod and take a sip of wine. Maybe this parenting shit isn’t so bad after all.
“Jocelyn. I’m your Momma.”
Then again, maybe it is.
Darby looks at Jocelyn and tilts her head, then she looks at me with accusing eyes. I’m so angry right now that I can barely see straight, but I know exactly how to stop this little piece of information from fermenting in her brain.
“She’s a liar,” I reply simply. “Come on, baby. Do you really think that Daddy would be such a mean man that he would do something like keep you and your Momma apart?”
Darby turns her eyes back to Jocelyn, then to me again, before she shimmies off of her chair and walks over to where I’m sitting.
“I wanna go to my room,” she says, dangerously close to tears.
“That’s a good idea, baby. You go to your room and I’ll come get you as soon as I’m done talking to your sister.” I put emphasis on the last word so that she knows that she does share Jocelyn’s blood, but not in the way that she’s trying to tell her she does.
So what if it makes me the bad guy? I’ve been the bad guy since I fell from my mother’s womb—but hey, you teach what you’ve learned during your upbringing, and I’m just passing on the “good word” as it was taught to me.
I never did feel quite right sticking my dick in someone that wasn’t family after my mom died, but I got used to it for a while. Then Jocelyn came along and everything was right in my world again.
Once Darby is out of earshot, I get to my feet and walk over to Jocelyn, who’s now cowering in her chair. She knows that I’m pissed; she knows that she fucked up, and she damn well knows what that means.
“You little bitch,” I seethe at her. “I did my best to be a good man to you today, to bring you up to meet our child, and this is the thanks I get?”
I yank Joce out of her chair and pull her body against mine. Her lower lip is trembling and the fear in her eyes tell me that she’s not my baby girl anymore. My daughter would never act like this. If my daughter pulled a knife on me, she would have fucking used it. This is just a shell of the woman I loved and nothing more.
“Guess it’s time to take out the trash,” I say quietly, my lips grazing against hers.
“No, I’m sorry, Pater! I don’t know what came over me, I won’t do it again. Please!” she begs as I begin to drag her out of the dining room.
“It’s too late for this bullshit and to be quiet honest with you, I’m done dealing with you. I’m done worrying if you’re alright and if you’re still alive. Everything will be better this way and I’ll never have to think about your miserable ass again after tonight.”
“Just one more chance, please,” she sobs as I drag her into the kitchen.
“You had your chance, now quit your fucking begging and clean your face. I’m gonna give you the chance to say good-bye to Darby, but not if you’re crying like a whiny little bitch,” I snap at her.
I drop her hand and leave her crying on the kitchen floor, a sobbing mess of disappointment as I call out for Darby.
“No! I’m not coming out of my room!” she shouts back.
I sigh angrily. I’m not in the mood for this bullshit and I’m going to snap and beat her if she doesn’t come to me.
“Darby! Don’t make me come to collect you. Bring your little spoiled ass out here, right now!” I shout at the top of my lungs.
I’ve never yelled at her like that before so she knows I’m damn serious, and within the next minute or so, I can see her door open slightly, and her head pop out to look at me with wide eyes.
I run a hand over my face and do my best to swallow the anger that I’m feeling at both of them right now and sigh.
“Come to your Daddy, baby. I’m sorry I yelled at you. I’m not mad at you, I promise,” I say, crouching down and holding my arms out. She takes a timid step out of her room and bites her lower lip nervously.
“You know I wouldn’t hurt you, Darbs,” I say as gently as I can, through grit teeth. “I need you to help me say good-bye to Jocelyn now, cause she’s gotta go and then we can be together. Just the two of us.”
Darby finally begins to walk slowly down the hallway and lets me pick her up in my arms when she reaches me. She doesn’t snuggle into me like she always does when I pick her up, and I can understand why.
“It’ll be okay from now on. I promise,” I whisper to her, giving her a gentle kiss on the chee
k. “Daddy loves you.”
Darby
"It’s a fucking shame it had to end like this again, but you knew the rules, so you have no one to blame but yourself,” Daddy says to Jocelyn as he reaches for the wooden gate he keeps on top of the well.
I can hear her at the bottom crying, telling him that she’s sorry, and that she’ll behave, but he just shakes his head and smiles like he always does.
I reach up and take his hand after he’s done nailing the gate shut and look up at him curiously. I’m not sure what’s going on and what she did that was so bad, but I think I remember now that she is my Momma after all. If she’s the same lady that lived in the well when I first started going over by it, then she has to be.
“Daddy?” I ask, giving his hand a tug. “Who’s that lady?”
He looks down at me and picks me up in his arms, giving my cheek a kiss.
“No one important, baby. I tried to give you a day that you would remember forever, and she fucked it up. But I want you to remember that it’s not your fault, okay? You didn’t do anything wrong.”
I can feel tears starting to spring to my eyes and I give him my best “but I love you” puppy dog look and try again.
“Is that my Momma?”
Daddy’s smile softens some, and he runs a hand back through my hair as he begins to carry me back toward our house.
“No. I would never do that to your Momma,” he promises, snuggling me close to him.
I believe him. Daddy’s never done anything bad to me before and he’s never lied to me either. Daddy is a good man and I’m happy with it being just me and him, anyway.
“Are we going to color some more?” I ask him, almost immediately forgetting about the bad lady in the well.
“Later. First, we’re gonna do a little something for me,” he whispers. It’s just like a secret, and I’m so happy that Daddy trusts me enough to tell me secret things—it makes me feel like a big girl.
He puts me down as soon as we’re inside and I wait for him while he closes the door and locks it. When he looks back down at me again, there’s something a little different about his eyes, but I’m not worried about it.
Cinere_An Inferno Novella Page 3
