Always On My Mind: A Bad Boy Rancher Love Story (The Dawson Brothers Book 1)

by Ali Parker

  "Keep it up, bad girl." He tugged at the back of her hair, his grip still tight around a thick handful of it. "You're going to be the death of me."

  "No dying on me. I plan on having a very long and fruitful life with you." She tapped his package and moved back. "Be safe, okay?"

  "I will, baby. Get back to the house soon. It's hell out here." He glanced around and closed the door as she backed up.

  The wind whipped around her, tossing her hair about. It was beautiful in Bar Harbor in the winter, a lot like New York and yet so different. Moving to Maine after college had been one of the best decisions of her life. Where she might end up having to move back because of Marc, she needed to separate herself from her family. They were toxic in more ways than one.

  She turned and stumbled back to the house, the snow making it hard to walk. Thank God for salting the roads.

  "There you are. I thought maybe Marc took you with him." Trisha glanced up as Lisa walked back into the small house. The smells and sights of Christmas were everywhere on the inside. It was the outside Trisha hadn't gotten to yet.

  Trisha's sons were down the hallway, laughing about something.

  "No way. I figured I would have one more cup of coffee and then head out. My friends and I are putting up our tree tonight. The boys are supposed to go get it. Marc's half-frozen though, so we'll see how it goes." She smiled and slipped her hands into her jacket pockets as she followed Trisha back into the kitchen. "You know that if you end up moving back to New York that I'll be fine. You can't make your decision based on me."

  "I know, but you know that I love working for you. It's been the best job of my adult life, and I've had lots of them." Trisha picked up the coffee pot and filled up two mugs. "Unless of course you want to get Mr. Carrington to take interest in an older woman. Much older?"

  Lisa chuckled. Michael Carrington was a mid-thirties billionaire who had purchased a mansion in Bar Harbor for long getaways. He was a real estate mogul from what she knew, but she didn't know much, which was a good thing. After their quick love affair, it was best to steer clear of him altogether. He needed to find a good woman and steal her heart, and that wasn't Lisa. He thought it was, but Lisa was hopeful that he would move on.

  "You never know. He surprised me by hosting the fall event for the community at the fire station. You would think he was a sweetheart, but I'm not too sure of that." Lisa reached up and took her mug from Trisha.

  "Well, men like him are often multi-layered." She sat down and glanced down to her coffee. "My husband was a man very much like that. The boys’ father."

  "Did you marry again after him?"

  "No." She looked up and smiled. "When he passed, I lost my way for a while. I did a few things I'm not proud of, but I've redeemed myself."

  "Wait. We have to redeem ourselves?" Lisa smiled. "I gotta get started soon then. How long does this redemption take and what do I need to do?"

  "Hush. Silly girl." Trisha laughed, and the sound lightened Lisa's spirit. Where her own mother was a hateful bitch, Trisha was loving, kind, accepting. They were friends, but Lisa felt closer to Trisha than she did her own family.

  "I like being thought of as a girl." Lisa lifted the mug to her lips. "I've done so much in my twenty-five years. I feel fifty."

  "You look twenty-five." She smiled. "And your handsome beau looks the same age. I know you were worried because he's younger, but don't be. He's a good man. I can tell."

  "He forgave me for the mix-up with Michael Carrington when we first met. I'd say he's a great guy." Lisa sat back, letting her thoughts move across the hurt look on Marc's face when he showed up at her office unannounced one afternoon during the summer and Michael had pulled her into an embrace. A hug and kiss she didn't want and pulled back from, but Marc saw what he saw.

  It was the most terrifying week of her life.

  "Very true." Lisa let out a soft sigh. "I think I figured out then that I was in love. It wasn't just lust with Marc, which was a weird revelation."

  "I bet." Trisha reached across the table and touched the top of Lisa's hand. "You going to be okay visiting your parents later this week?"

  Lisa nodded, trying not to let her mood sour. "I think so. Marc will be with me." She shrugged. "Not sure that will honestly make much of a difference, but I like to think it might. My mom is a beast in front of everyone. She is who she is, and it's your problem if you don't like it."

  "Is she different with your father? It strikes me as odd that he's so incredibly devoted to her when she's as bad as you say she is." Trisha moved back and wrapped her hands around her coffee mug, her expression inquisitive.

  "She's not as harsh, but she's still herself." Lisa took a sip of her drink and tried to think through the conversations she'd had with her father when she was younger. "My mom went through a pretty rough season when they found out she was pregnant with me. She didn't want kids yet, and her mom and dad were killed by a drunk driver. It was all too much, or so my father tells the story that way."

  "Oh. Wow." Trisha reached up and brushed her fingers by her lips. "Do you think that you remind her of that time? That pain?"

  "No clue. I would never treat a child the way she treated me. She was mean. Hateful." Lisa's vision blurred with unshed tears. "I tried for a long time to please her, but there comes a point when you know that you'll never be enough."

  "Oh, Lisa. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to make you upset." Trisha got up and wrapped Lisa in a warm hug from above her. "You're more than enough, sweetheart. You're perfect."

  "It's okay." Lisa worked to wipe the tears from her face as embarrassment raced through her. She hadn't cried over her mother's lack of acceptance in years. Why now?

  Because it mattered again.

  "No, it's not. Maybe you should just go see Marc's mother. She's a sweet woman, right?" Trisha kissed the top of Lisa's head and moved back to her seat. "Spend time with her and Marc and your friends. Don't put yourself through that."

  Lisa pulled herself together and took a shaky breath. "I wish it were that easy. We are going to see Ms. Martin, but I need to see my dad if nothing else. Maybe I'll just ask him to lunch or dinner instead of going over there. I don't know. I think I'm getting emotional over it because before it didn't matter, or it hasn't for a long time. It does now."

  Lies. It's mattered all my life. It's hurt... all my life.

  "Why does it matter so much now? You're successful, beautiful and grown up." Trisha tilted her head to the side, the expression on her face making Lisa feel loved, welcomed.

  "Because I assume that Marc and I will start talking about next steps soon. I feel like we'll probably get married in the next few years." She glanced down at her hands as a torrent of emotion rolled over her. "I've always wanted her to love me, to be a part of my life, but she never has. It's stupid, but I figured when I got married and then when I had kids, everything would change. That something inside her would melt. That she would forgive me or something. I don't know. It's stupid."

  "Forgive you for what?" Trisha's voice was nothing more than a whisper.

  It was nice to have someone to share the pain with, but talking about it only caused it to roar to life again inside of Lisa. She'd honestly believed she was over it, but nothing could have been further from the truth.

  "For being born?" Lisa mumbled and sunk back in her chair. "She's a bitch, and I need to get over it. Next subject."

  Trisha seemed to be fighting with what to say, but thankfully, her sons walked into the room and the conversation turned to dinner. With that, Lisa got up, gathered her stuff and headed back into town. She had a shopping trip with her friends, at the art store of all places.

  Chapter 3

  Marc

  "Why did we have to get the biggest tree in the whole damn place?" Marc gave Jake a look as he leaned over to grip the tree trunk. They'd had a little too much fun actually cutting the thing down, or him and Jake had. Drake finally opened up during the ordeal to let them both know that his mother passed away a
month before. It was shocking, and a little too sobering.

  All Marc had left was his mother, his father having cheated on her and run off to California when he was just a boy. If it wasn't for his mom and sister, Kari, life would have hardened him into the type of man he'd never want to be.

  "You're the one that picked it out." Drake reached down to help him pick it up and drag it toward the truck. The bad boy gym owner had started to grow on Marc. He was quiet and didn't say much, but there was a side to him that was funny, and the guy was giving, whether he wanted to admit it or not.

  Might as well get along with both of them... we've got a long life together.

  Being the youngest in the group by four to eight years, Marc had to make sure to keep his immature moments for his best friend, Drayer, back in New York. Jake would most likely be his brother-in-law before too much longer, and he was a great guy, but none of them knew how to really cut loose and have fun.

  At least not in the ways Marc enjoyed doing.

  "You guys challenged me to dry hump the tree. Besides, Drake picked it out.” He chuckled. "If I have pine needles in my cock when we get back to the house, Lisa is going to kill you guys."

  The sound of a lady yelping near them had Marc's cheeks burning. She'd overheard their conversation. Great.

  "Sorry." Jake lifted his hand and shook his head. "He's not had his meds this morning."

  "You didn't even pull your pants down." Drake gave Marc a challenging look. "That would have been funny as fuck."

  "Don't encourage him, man." Jake glanced over his shoulder at the two of them. He was going to play older brother, which was fitting. He was the big brother type all the way.

  "I don't need encouragement." Marc stopped in front of the truck and leaned down to get a better grasp on the tree trunk. "Did the girls get decorations?"

  "I'm sure they did." Jake moved to the back of the tree. "All right. On three. One. Two. Three."

  They groaned and hoisted the tree up, moving it into the truck as pine needles littered the ground. It took a few tries to get it in the truck right, and by the time they were done, Marc was itching and sweaty. He glanced to their left to see another family getting a tree, but a worker in a machine was lifting it into the truck for them.

  "Really?" Marc put his hands on his hips and gave Jake a pointed look.

  "We don't need no help. We're men. Well, we are. You're still a boy." Drake clamped his hand down on Marc's shoulder.

  "Call me what you like. My girl is a woman... all the way." Marc pulled from him and gave them a cheesy grin. They both knew Lisa was a minx and a half.

  "He's gotta point." Jake wrapped his arm around Drake's broad shoulders. "Speaking of your girl, are you guys going to visit her family? Kari tells me they’re a piece of work."

  "Yeah, we're going to split the time between my mom and her mom and dad. It's not her dad that's a dick. It's her mom." Marc looked down and brushed off the dirt and pine needles from his jacket. "She was the top defense lawyer in New York for years. Not sure if she still is, but she's a bitch and hasn't ever been good to Lisa."

  "That sounds like fun." Drake shook his head as he moved away from Jake. "Let's run by the store and grab a few bottles of wine and maybe some good beer before we go back to the house?"

  "Yes. And a bottle of vodka. I need something to warm me up." Marc walked to the passenger’s side of the truck and squeezed in the small backseat. Jake and Drake were good friends, Marc was the third wheel, so no need to make that more obvious. The guys were kind enough to include him in everything when he was in town, or maybe Lisa silently muscled them into it. Either way, he was happy to be out of class and living life for a few weeks.

  "Hey, how much longer you got at NYU?" Drake got into the passenger's seat and buckled up. "Jake says you're thinking about cutting out of your master’s program to get done early?"

  "Yeah." Marc leaned back and turned, pulling his long legs up into the seat with him. "I'll be done in May this next year. I'll go back for my master’s some other time. I was thinking I wanted to go into pre-med, but it's too much school. I'm going to look into working at the hospital or maybe teaching biology at a high school. Who knows."

  "All of those sound like great career options." Jake got in the truck and started it as he shivered. "Fuck it's cold here."

  "It's supposed to be." Marc chuckled.

  "It's the same in Chicago where I'm from." Drake popped Jake in the chest. "You're not in cow patty country anymore, man. You gotta get tough for the winters."

  "Yeah, or go back home." Jake snorted and pulled out of the snowy parking lot, the tires sliding a little.

  Go back home? Marc couldn't ignore the slight fear that Jake would pop the question to Kari and then try to get her back to Texas. Could he support that? Life without his big sister, who happened to double as one of his closest friends.

  Maybe he was overthinking it. There was no way in hell Kari would leave New England. Not even for the town's teacher of the year who doubled as a firefighter on the weekend.

  Naw... she wouldn't do that. Would she?

  ***

  "Hey." Lisa stood up and turned to reach for one of the packs of beer in his hand as he walked into the pretty white house the girls were renting from Jake. It sat on the edge of the water and couldn't have been more perfect.

  "Hey, yourself." He set the other case of beer down and reached for his woman, pulling her in and kissing her warm, soft lips. "God, it's freezing out there."

  "Your little nose is red." She rubbed her fingers along his face and looked a little too excited.

  "What's up? What are you hiding?" He moved back, but kept his arms around her. Excitement danced in the pit of his stomach. She was up to something, but that usually meant great sex was somewhere in the near future. Lisa loved coffee, sleeping in and fucking as often as possible. She was obviously created for him.

  "Come here and let me show you a new nightie I bought for our trip to New York." She pulled out of his arms and turned to jog down the hallway.

  "Really? Right now?" He followed after her, trying to ignore the swirling desire in his stomach. She could turn him on with nothing more than a smile. A nightie? "Fuck. Please tell me you're not trying it on. I'm not sure I would survive it."

  "Get in here," she called from down the hall.

  "So bossy." He turned the corner and walked into her messy room, closing the door behind him. The smell of her perfume and shampoo wrapped around him, sending arrows of lust through his system. He groaned and sat down on the edge of the bed, the covers insanely cold.

  She walked out from the bathroom with a red nighty held up to the front of her body. "You like it?"

  "Put it on." He leaned back, resting on his elbows.

  "Now?" She gave him a look. "We have to get the tree up. I'm saving it for the trip."

  He sat back up and reached for her, jerking her toward him and turning to press her to the bed as she bounced down on it. "Never mind the nightie. It's perfect. No need to put it on."

  She laughed, and the world felt right. The beautiful woman beneath him would hold him captive forever. She's proven that over the last few months. He couldn't eat, sleep, study, anything, without longing for her. He was lost to the idea of them together, and she was stuck. Not that she seemed to mind in the slightest.

  "So you don't like it?" She pouted and wrapped herself around him.

  "Oh, I do, but you don't need to put it on. Just hold it up and wag it at me. I can imagine you already in it." He ground against her as she moaned softly.

  "We need to get back into the living room, Marc. You bad boy."

  "Because you make me one." He kissed at her exposed collarbone before moving to stand up.

  She started to get up too, but he put his hand on her tummy. "What?"

  "Not yet." He smiled and reached to tug her leggings down.

  "Don't start something you can't finish," she whispered roughly and reached down to pull her pink panties down her thighs
.

  "Oh, I'll finish it. Just lay back and moan the way I like you to." He moved down to his knees and pulled her toward him. "Loudly, please. I want you embarrassed."

  "Asshole," she whispered and sunk her fingers into his hair, pulling him down to take care of her before the evening really began.

  Chapter 4

  Lisa

  All of the horrid emotions from the conversation with Trisha earlier that day had melted away. It was hard to be upset or feel unloved in the presence of Kari and Sicily. Her two best friends had a way of making her smile when she didn't want to and laugh in spite of herself.

  Having Marc look at her like she was the most beautiful creature alive helped as well. He was so fucking hot, his messy caramel-colored hair and big smile enough to steal her breath.

  "God, I love you," he mumbled before slipping between her thighs and spreading her open.

  Pleasure swelled inside her stomach as she ran her nails through his hair and rolled her hips. He sucked her clit into his mouth and glanced up, locking eyes with her. He was bold and so assured of himself, and yet he was young and still in college. It was hard to swallow the idea of him wanting an older woman, but there was no denying everything that was happening between them.

  "So good," she whispered and locked her thighs around his face as he flicked his tongue across her center. "Use your fingers. Make it fast. We need to get back out there."

  "Hush. You're too bossy for your own good." He smiled and ran his fingers down her wet skin as he moved back and watched her with dark hunger. "You smell so fucking good, baby doll. I swear we wouldn't get anything done if we lived closer."

  "We'd have a lot of fun making babies." She gripped the sheets and moaned as he pressed two thick fingers into the warmth of her body. She never wanted kids before Marc, and where she figured it would be a long time until they had them, he was too fun to tease about it.