by Ali Parker
“Did they know you came in the house?”
“Hell yeah, they knew. I started going nuts. Throwing shit around and acting a fool. I’m honestly ashamed of myself.”
“What?” She reached out and touched his arm, rubbing up and down his bicep as he kept his gaze locked on the road before him. “You’re ashamed? That’s a little backward, my friend.”
“I’m ashamed because I don’t love her. It was embarrassment that made me act a fool. I guess if I loved her I would’ve choked the asshole out.”
She squeezed his arm again and pointed to an open parking spot. “Park there and we can go up to the house and talk.”
He parked and looked over at her in the darkness. “I just hate that I’d made peace with her being the person that she was and gave her my full support to be that person, and this was how she responded.”
Rebecca opened her door, reaching over for her purse and moving to the back of the car to wait. He got out of the car and walked toward her, his posture so dejected after the events of the night. She pulled him into a warm hug, his tall figure leaning over and resting on her. He was like the brother she’d never had, and though his heart wasn’t necessarily broken, his pride was bruised beyond belief.
“Come on. Let’s go inside and I’ll make you something warm to drink.”
He simply nodded and moved back, Rebecca reaching over to take his hand into hers and pull him toward the house. She’d only seen Parker in such a state a few times, one of the worst being when his former wife decided to have an affair and he’d walked in on her having sex with another man. That scenario had landed him in jail for the night, and Rebecca had bailed him out the next morning, as soon as she heard about it. He’d given his ex-wife the house and come to live with Rebecca for a month or so until he could find a new place and emotionally stand on his own two feet again.
They walked up the long sidewalk to her place and took the elevator in silence. She kept rubbing his thumb with her thumb, a hopeful reminder that she cared for him and would help him heal and get past this mess that was his life.
She moved in front of him to open the door, the draft in the hallway causing her to shiver. “Why is it still so cold here? It’s springtime.”
“It’s Texas, Becca. The winter moves to the beginning of the year instead of the end like in most normal places,” he responded, his voice deadened.
Parker kicked off his shoes as he walked into the house, his level of comfort in her place giving her peace. His gray pullover fit him well, and his jeans hung low on his hips. If she’d ever had any feelings outside of familial ones for him, they’d have been a couple a long time ago.
He walked to the couch and plopped down, a heavy sigh rising up from him. “I honestly just don’t get it. I feel like I’m attractive and a good catch, but first Cindy and now this? What the hell?”
She slipped her shoes off and dropped her purse and keys at the door, shaking her head. “I honestly don’t get it.” She walked toward him, stopping in front of the couch where he was and kneeling on the floor in front of him. She laid her forearms on his legs and leaned toward him, her gaze serious and locking onto his. “You’re perfect, and you know it. You’re successful and handsome, kind and caring, you have a great house and a fantastic business. You’re everything anyone could want.”
He crossed his arms over his strong chest and tilted his head as he stared at her. “Then why don’t they want me?”
She sat back on her heels, tugging at the bottom of her short dress a little. “I don’t know, but one thing is for sure … they don’t deserve you at all.”
She pushed up, using his legs to stand and then walked to the kitchen, talking over her shoulder. “What do you want to drink?”
“I don’t care. Something warm to make me feel better, I guess. I’m crashing here, unless you have a handsome male friend headed this way.”
She laughed and pulled down the coffee beans she’d just picked up from a small specialty store the other day. “That’s a joke, right? My love life might make you feel better, for sure.”
She could hear Parker get up and move toward the kitchen. He slid into one of her barstools and watching her as he smiled sadly. “I’m not sure why your love life isn’t the stuff of fairy tales, honestly.”
She turned and looked over her shoulder as she pushed the button to crush the small flavorful beans. She waited until the sound died down, turning completely to face him. “Oh yeah? Well, it’s the stuff of humorous nightmares. I’ve waited for all these years for Kade to return home, and he’s back.”
Parker’s face registered shock. “Wait … Kade McMillian is back here in Houston? Like, for good?”
She nodded and moved toward the coffeepot, working to get it started.
“And how are you with that? How does he look? Everything you hoped for? Wait … is he married?”
She laughed softly and turned around, walking toward him as the coffee started to percolate. “That’s a lot of questions, Park.”
“Yeah, well, take them one at a time then.”
“Let’s see … he’s back for good and is the new partner in a construction firm, the one that just happens to be overseeing my house.”
“Oh Lord. Fate is an ugly bitch that hates you with a passion.”
“My thoughts exactly.” She touched her finger to her lips and looked toward the ceiling as she shuffled through the rest of his questions. “He’s tall like you, but built like a line-backer with great hair, beautiful skin and eyes that make your heart want to melt.”
Parker rolled his eyes. “Glad nothing’s changed. God forbid the lady killers from our childhood grow potbellies and actually have to work for attention.”
She laughed. “He’s not everything I hoped for, though. I think I made him into a god in my daydreams, but he’s not. He’s just an average guy with the ability to crush my heart, very much the same way he did all those years ago. And, no, he’s not married.”
“Wow,” Parker said softly, running his fingers through his hair and getting up. He grabbed two coffee cups from the counter and started fixing their drinks just as each of them liked it as she moved to sit in his seat, a sudden heaviness falling over her.
“Wow is right. Trisha thought it would be good to invite him to the club tonight to surprise me, but I’d already seen him at the house this morning with Jason on my arm.” She rolled her eyes and dropped her head to her folded arms.
“Jason? He went with you to the house thing? Why?”
“His father has a construction company, and he thought he could help make the process go better, or smoother at least.”
“That’s cool. Did he help?”
She thought about it for a minute, reaching out to take her coffee from Parker and found herself smiling. “Yeah. Actually, he did everything. Once I realized it was Kade I was dealing with, I was somewhat useless.”
“Oh no,” Parker mumbled and lifted the mug to his lips, his eyes rolling back.
“What?”
“Did Jason know that Kade was your high school fling and the boy that’s ruined you from dating for the last twenty years?”
“Sixteen years, and I think he pretty much figured it out to some degree.”
“That probably went over like a ton of bricks.”
“It was fine, and your comment is invalid.” She rolled her eyes and took a small sip of the warm beverage.
“What’s invalid?”
“A ton of bricks don’t go over.” She lifted her eyebrow.
“That’s kind of the point of the phrase. Anyway, really? With all we both have going on, you want to try to correct my metaphors?”
“Analogies.”
“Metaphors.”
“Whatever,” she barked and sighed softly.
“I won.” He smiled and laughed, the sound bringing her back to reality. They were so good for each other and yet could poke holes in one another faster than anyone else she’d been close to. Parker was a permanent fixture in
her life and the only one, other than Trisha, who’d stuck it out with her throughout the years.
“I danced with Kade tonight, and all I thought about was Jason.”
“I knew you’d like him if you gave him a chance.”
“I do like him, but he is my employee and he’s way too damn young for me, Park.” She sat back, taking her mug with her.
“Age is just a number, Becca. He’s an old soul in that young strapping body. We hired the boy because he was brilliant and innovative. It felt like I was talking to my father when we had the interview. He knows what he wants in life and it’s all good stuff. He’s a great catch. Much better than some has been that’s coming back into your life after sixteen years and expecting you to drop your panties for him.”
She laughed and shook her head. “You think Kade expected me to sleep with him?”
Parker leaned against the counter and stared at her for a few moments before answering. “You don’t think he did?”
“I think it’s kinda hot that he would want to.”
Parker laughed loudly. “He’d be a damn idiot not to.”
She sat her mug down and leaned forward, tilting her head as her hair cascaded forward. “Why didn’t you ask me out after everything that happened with Cindy if you think so much of me?”
He set his mug down and walked around the counter, moving to stand in front of her and turning the chair so she was facing him. He moved in swiftly and wrapped her in a hug, laying his head on her shoulder and squeezing tightly as he spoke. “Because there is no safe place left in my life but you. There are no other arms to run to, no shoulder to cry on, no one who’s willing to love me through any and everything. You’re the most precious thing in my life, and if I bastardized that the way I’ve done every other relationship in my sordid past and lost you … I’m not sure what I’d do.”
She hugged him tightly, knowing exactly how he felt. She turned and kissed the side of his face, moving back a little and smiling up at him. “That’s a bummer because I was thinking sex would make us both feel better.”
His eyes lit up and he smiled brightly. “Really?”
“No, but it’s good to know you do.”
They laughed and spent the rest of the night on the couch, working through their various lost love adventures until the sun came up to remind them that a new day approached.
Chapter 15
After crashing at around six that morning, Rebecca didn’t stir until close to one that afternoon, her phone buzzing on the nightstand next to her. She yawned and stretched, hating to get up and knowing that it was far past time. Sunday was her day to shop and go for a long jog, a day of catching up a little here and there and resting like crazy in all the breaks in between.
Six messages on her phone. Five were from Trisha asking about Parker and talking about how great Kade was. There was one from Jason asking if she wanted to join him at a friend’s house to watch the game and eat some snacks later that afternoon. She laid the phone back down and crawled out of bed, padding to the living room to see Parker snuggled up on her couch, dead to the world.
Her situation was rough, but Parker’s was heartbreaking. It might be a good thing in disguise, but there was no way he was going to see that for a while. Most women thought that having a man cheat on them was worse than anything they could imagine. Parker had two of the people he cared about cheat on him, and they weren’t just girlfriends, but his wives. Another divorce headed his way, and he wasn’t even forty yet. She sighed softly, working to get the coffeepot to give her a jolt of energy.
Parker stirred a little, snorting and turning over. Rebecca walked over to the back of the couch and looked down at him, noticing that his hair was a mess and his eyes darkened with exhaustion. She started to reach over and brush his hair back, but she didn’t want to wake him and most certainly didn’t want him getting the wrong impression. It would be great if she loved in him a romantic sense because they would be the perfect couple, and yet she didn’t. He was her best friend, her brother, her business partner and nothing else.
Handsome as they come and so kind and loving that it made most men look villainous, but she was in love with an idea that the right guy would come along and sweep her off her feet. That guy was supposed to be Kade, but she honestly felt nothing for him now that she’d seen him.
How weird is that? All these years, and nothing?
She smiled at the realization that she had felt something with Jason, though. His humor and boyish good looks had her looking and feeling like she was fifteen again. She chuckled at the irony before pouring herself a cup of coffee and walking back to her bedroom. She took a quick sip and sat the cup down, reaching for her phone and texting Trisha back that she’d call her later. She texted Jason only to have him call in the middle of the text.
“Hello?” she whispered, her voice not yet awake.
“Hey, beautiful. Did I wake you?”
“No. I woke up a few minutes ago on my own. What’s up?”
“I texted you earlier, but hadn’t heard back from you. I’m headed to a buddy’s house and wanted to see if you want to come watch the game with us. Crowd of my friends and a few co-workers. I tried to get ahold of Parker, but his phone’s going straight to voicemail.”
“I can’t make it today, but I’m sure Parker would love to go. If I talk to him before you do I’ll tell him that you’re looking for him.”
“Bummer. I wanted to see you.”
She smiled as chill bumps rushed across her skin. Was it okay to feel so taken by someone who’d been in kindergarten when she graduated high school? Her smile dropped as she shook her head.
“You’ll see me tomorrow at work. Also,” she added, her tone turning very businesslike, “Mr. Vandenbilt wants me to come to Cushing on Tuesday afternoon so that I can meet with him on Wednesday morning. Parker and I spoke about it yesterday and you’ll be the associate on that client, so plan to come with me if you’re free.”
She could almost hear his smile through the phone. “That sounds perfect. Let me know if you change your mind about today. Always a place on the couch next to me for you.”
She laughed. “Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind.”
They hung up and she flopped back down in the bed, her T-shirt and sleeping pants a perfect combination for a lazy Sunday afternoon of lounging around and pretending that life was as it should be and things that weren’t would only get better.
“Why is the fridge totally empty?” Parker’s voice yelled above the sound of the water from her shower.
Rebecca yelped and covered herself, as if Parker could see through the thick shower curtain. She rolled her eyes and growled, leaning her head out and staring at him as he peeked through the slightly opened door.
“Why are you talking to me while I’m in the shower?”
“Because it’s hot, and I’m hungry.”
She laughed and shook her head. “I’ll be out in a minute and we’ll go grab something at the grocery store to cook. Shut the freaking door.”
He laughed and she heard the sound of the door shutting, leaning over to peek out once more to make sure he didn’t stay in the bathroom with her. The man had no couth at all, but she loved him all the same. The thought of spending the afternoon curled up on a couch next to Jason was a little more desirable than she cared to admit to herself, her will failing horribly in the face of carnal attraction. He was everything she imagined wanting, and yet his age still plagued her above all else.
She laughed at the remembrance of him quitting in the restaurant the day before, the man having no worries about finding another job but wanting a chance at romance with her enough to leave a good one. It was impressive, and she almost felt bad for having ignored his advances for the last year, but the truth of the matter was that society would accept their relationship—if there ever was one—about as well as she was accepting it.
What had Kade referred to Jason as? Junior?
She rolled her eyes and turned to wash the remnants
of her coconut conditioner from her hair, the air smelling clean and fresh as the nasty scent of the club drained away from her.
The guy at the bar had thought she was only in her mid-twenties too, so maybe it was all about perception. Most people that didn’t know her would assume that she and Jason were around the same age, but it was those people that knew her best that left her chewing her lip.
But really, who’s opinion mattered to her? Trisha’s and Parker’s, really. Her folks mattered too, but they would most likely be happy with a groom ordered from a catalog rather than no one at this point. She was their only child, and their hopes for having grandchildren were dwindling. Her mother was almost frantic every time they got on the phone, bringing up Rebecca’s lack of love interests over and over again. She hated to talk to them more than once a week because it was heartbreaking to be reminded that she was behind the curveball in the game of life.
She tugged at her hair and reached to turn off the shower, her worry over Jason melting with the firm knowledge that if things were meant to work out, well, then they simply would. But what if being with someone younger brought up a whole new layer of issues? What if he was jealous or demanding? Younger men always seemed to think they should come first, and a sense of general mistrust sat heavy on them. Would Jason be offended at Parker spending the night at her house every once in a while? He’d been doing it for years now, and that wasn’t going to change. Parker getting his life completely together would be like her doing so … unicorns were hanging out in the land where such a scenario might exist.
She smiled and dried herself off, pulling on her jeans and a white T-shirt. She walked to her bedroom, her hair pulled up in the towel and her cheeks burning from the heat of the water. Parker laid across her bed, eating Cheetos and yelling at the TV. He looked up as she passed by and wagged his eyebrows.
“Hot.”
