‘You think that was the right way to handle that, do you?’ Kip asked, running up alongside her.
‘If you’ve come to start on me, Kip, I’m really not in the mood.’
‘Evidently.’ He followed her out into the yard, leaning back against the clubhouse wall and lighting up a cigarette. ‘Want one?’ he asked, holding out the packet.
Lexi shook her head, folding her arms as she sat down on one of the tables outside.
‘When did you give up?’ Kip took a drag, his eyes never leaving his sister.
‘About a year or so ago.’
Kip just raised an eyebrow, taking another drag on his cigarette. ‘You know he’s still in love with you, don’t you?’
‘Kip, come on. Please. I’ve ended it, okay? I didn’t come back here to re-open old wounds or wreck his life all over again.’
‘It doesn’t matter what your intentions were, Lexi. Jesse can’t walk away, he can’t get his life back on track unless you walk away. Do you understand?’
She slid down from the table, walking away from her brother, her arms still folded across her chest. ‘I’ve got things to do.’
Kip ran after her, grabbing her arm and swinging her around to face him. ‘He was good, you know? Okay, for a little while after you left he was kind of broken. Didn’t really know what to do with himself. Spent a lot of time over at The Candy Cave shagging every new girl that looked in his direction but, hey, what better way to get over a broken heart than to spend all your time at the club’s porn studios grabbing your kicks whatever way you can?’
Lexi shook her head, pulling her arm free and turning to walk away again, but he was too quick, grasping hold of her wrist before she could get away. She swung around to stare at him, her eyes blazing. ‘Do you think I had it easy, Kip? Do you? After what happened with Shane I wasn’t even that welcome back at Dad’s for a while. For some strange reason you lot just can’t seem to accept that an old lady is just as capable of making a mistake as any of you are, but if we do, God forbid we should be forgiven. So, in reality, brother, if you’d all just butted out, let me and Jesse deal with it in our own way, then maybe none of this would have happened.’ Even as she said those words, she knew it had never been quite as simple as that.
‘Bullshit!’
‘You have no idea what went on over there, Kip. No fucking idea.’
‘Why did you come home, Lexi? He was just getting back on his feet…’
‘Jesus! Does this all have to be about you and Jesse? I came back for me, all right? I came back for me. Because there are things I need to sort out, and I’m sorry if that interferes with your life or affects your friends in ways I really can’t help… and it isn’t my fault he still loves me, Kip. If he does still love me.’
‘You shouldn’t have slept with him.’
‘No. I shouldn’t have. You’re right. But I did, and I’m sorry, because that really wasn’t fair, but…’ She looked up, right into her brother’s eyes. They’d once been so close, and she missed him. So much. She really, really missed him. ‘I need to be here, Kip. And I don’t expect you to understand that – I don’t expect anyone to understand that, but, I just need to be here. In Paradise.’
He let go of her wrist and she stared down at it, watching as a weak red mark formed on her skin where he’d grabbed her.
‘Like I said, I’ve got things to do,’ she whispered, turning and walking away. She just didn’t know where the hell to start.
Nine
‘I’m worried about her, Tay,’ Angie said, walking into the garage where Tay was busy working on Sheriff Bailey’s bike.
‘Who?’ he asked, wiping his hands on a rag he’d pulled out of his jeans pocket.
‘Jesus, Tay. Lexi. Who the hell did you think I meant?’
Tay leant against the bike, shoving the rag back in his pocket. ‘She seems fine to me.’
Angie raised an eyebrow, folding her arms. ‘She seems fine, does she? She laid out Jesse’s ex this morning, she’s been staying over at the clubhouse night after night, despite the fact she has a home of her own to go to now, and this morning she…’ Angie stopped talking, looking away, avoiding Tay’s eyes.
‘This morning she, what, Angie?’
‘Nothing,’ Angie sighed, pushing a hand through her hair. ‘Nothing. I just think… I don’t know…’ She walked over to Tay, letting him pull her into his arms, closing her eyes as he kissed her slowly. ‘I don’t want her to leave again, Tay. I lost my daughter once, I can’t do that a second time. I need her here. I need to keep an eye on her.’
‘You don’t think Charlie was doing that over in England?’
She played with the collar of his shirt. ‘I don’t know. All I know is, I’m her mother, and I just let her walk out of here, I pushed her away…’
‘Feeling guilty?’
‘Of course I am!’ She looked at him. ‘Don’t you?’
‘Baby, I don’t ever feel guilty about anything, you know that.’
She let go of him, stepping back. ‘Yeah, well, maybe you should give it a try some time. Might make you appear more human.’
He smirked, winking at her and mouthing another kiss in her direction. ‘And maybe I don’t want to appear human.’
She smiled at him. ‘I’d better get back to the office. I’ve left one of the Prospects in there and he can barely string a sentence together this morning so God help us if he answers the phone.’
She turned to go, but Tay’s voice caused her to turn back around. ‘Has she said anything to you?’
‘About what?’ Angie frowned.
‘About what happened to Shane. Has she asked any questions, said anything to you that might make you think she knows something.’
Angie slowly shook her head, avoiding his eyes. ‘No. She hasn’t. Do you… do you really think she’s gonna keep going with that one?’
‘You were the one who said she’d have her suspicions.’
‘Well, maybe I’m thinking she’s got other things on her mind now.’
Tay turned back to the bike he was working on. ‘Like you said, though, she isn’t stupid. So if she does say anything, you let me know, okay?’
Angie didn’t reply, she just stood there, her hands in her pockets, watching Tay for a moment or two until he turned around, his eyes meeting hers this time.
‘Did you hear me, Angie?’
‘Yes. I heard you.’
‘Anything, all right?’
‘Would it be so bad if she found out the truth, Tay?’
Tay’s eyes stayed locked on hers. ‘I don’t know. And until I’m sure she can handle it, I’m not really willing to take that risk.’
***
Lexi flung open the door, her heart rocking to a stop inside her chest as she saw him standing there, his bike parked out front.
‘What are you doing here?’
‘It’s too risky over at the clubhouse.’
‘What is?’
‘This.’ He stepped inside, kicking the door shut behind him, pushing her back against the wall, his mouth on hers before she had a chance to protest. But that was never really going to happen. Still, as much as she craved this man, as much as she needed him, she wasn’t just going to melt in his arms like some lovesick teenager. Even though part of her wanted to do nothing but that.
‘We gonna try the bed this time,’ she whispered, touching his face with her fingertips, searching his eyes for something that would tell her this was real. That he wasn’t just here to fuck her then run, although, she’d take that. If that was all he was willing to give. She knew enough about these men – and about Coby in particular – to know that having them for keeps took work.
‘Too bloody right we are, darlin’.’ She felt her insides weaken at the sound of his deep Scottish accent, breathing in hard as he pulled her into the living room and along the hallway that led to her bedroom, not stopping until they were safely inside. ‘Now get naked and let me see what the hell I’m fighting here.’
She pushed him down on to the bed, straddling him, still fully clothed. ‘Why are you here, Coby?’
‘I guess seeing you lay out Deena this morning – that was one hell of a turn on, you have no idea. One minute I’m fucking you, the next you’re fighting… that’s a hard-on waiting to happen right there, sweetheart.’
She couldn’t help smiling, leaning in to kiss his open mouth, running her tongue along the back of his teeth, nipping his bottom lip, her fingers running over the long scar that ran right across his left cheek. Just one of many battle souvenirs he possessed. How he’d got them, Lexi didn’t even want to think about.
‘But you’ve opened up one hell of a Pandora’s box here, kid, and I can’t stay away now. I can’t forget how you feel, how you taste… I can’t forget any of that, not anymore, because I’ve been back there now. You made me go back there…’
She shut him up with a kiss, her thumbs stroking his rough cheeks, her groin pressing down on to his as the kiss grew deeper, until she could feel his hard-on digging into her.
‘You’re not playing fair again, Lexi.’
‘I’m not playing, full stop,’ she whispered, pulling off her t-shirt, pushing her naked breasts against him, willing him to touch her, to lower his head and suck on her nipples until she couldn’t take any more.
‘This is still a dangerous game,’ he said quietly, his fingers trailing lazily over her breasts, his eyes following their every move. ‘Jesus, I’d forgotten how fucking beautiful these were.’ He finally lowered his head, his tongue darting over her nipples in turn, first one, then the other, the feeling of something akin to a million tiny pokers prodding her skin shooting through her. ‘Wrap your legs around me, baby, come on.’
She did as she was told, letting him pick her up as he stood up, turning around and laying her back down on the bed, slowly stripping her of any remaining clothes, until she was completely naked, bar her boots.
‘Fuck me!’ he groaned, pushing a hand through his hair as he stared at her. ‘What the hell are we doing here, Lexi?’
‘Just come to bed,’ she whispered. ‘Please.’
He pulled off his cut, throwing it down on a nearby chair before ridding himself of the rest of his clothes. Lexi watched him undress, all the while her heart beating faster and louder, an almost painful feeling of anticipation building up inside of her. He wasn’t perfect by any means, but she craved this man, and all Lexi knew was that she needed him so much. And she’d never really needed anybody before, but this man – she needed him.
‘I fucking hate losing fights,’ he said, lowering himself down over her.
She pulled her legs up around him, pushing his hair back off his face. The relief she felt at having him back in her arms was immense. She couldn’t describe it, the weight that was almost falling off her shoulders as he held her. The pain he was kissing away, the hurt he was erasing. Or masking. The lies they were hiding. ‘You usually fight a lot harder than this, I have to admit.’
He looked at her, pushing his way inside her before she had time to realize he was doing it. ‘You’re fucking lethal, sweetheart. You’ve bulldozed your way back into my fucking life and I don’t know what the hell I’m doing anymore.’
She pushed her hips up against his, angling her body slightly so he could push deeper, which he did, causing her to moan quietly as he took her over once more, his strong, tattooed arms holding her tight.
‘Shit! Lexi…! Jesus Christ!’
She clung on to him as he thrust in and out of her hard, painfully fast, his hands pushing her thighs wider apart and she couldn’t help but scream out loud as hips crashed against hips, his body trying to go deeper than it physically could. And as he reached his own endgame, pumping out into her everything she’d ever wanted from him, he held her against him, kissing her roughly, pulling her head back by her hair as he made sure she took every last drop of him, thudding into her until he was sure he was finished.
And as soon as he was, he pulled out of her, his arms letting her go so she fell back against the pillows. ‘I’d better go,’ he said, getting up off the bed.
She closed her eyes, aware that he was getting dressed now. But she didn’t make him stay. She said nothing. She knew how this worked. She knew the score. She’d feared this was the way it could go, and she’d been right. He’d laid down the ground rules and she could either accept them, or she could walk away. And she knew exactly which option she was going for.
***
‘I thought you were on your way home. What are you still doing here?’ Angie asked, walking into the office and finding Tay there.
‘I could ask you the same question,’ Tay replied, swinging his feet down from the desk, sliding his phone back into his pocket.
‘I was cleaning up the clubhouse. Not sure what the hell Blake and Luca were doing in there this afternoon but they left one hell of a mess.’
‘Then you should have made them clean it up. They’re adults, not schoolboys. They need to learn how to respect that place.’
Angie narrowed her eyes as she looked at him. ‘You all right? You seem a bit on edge.’
‘I’m fine,’ Tay sighed, getting up and making his way over to the door. ‘Just got a bit of business to sort out.’
‘What kind of business?’ Angie asked, watching him closely.
He turned to face her, moving so he was standing right in front of her. ‘Remember your place, sweetheart. You may be Queen around here, but you’re still just an old lady, which means you don’t need to know shit about any business I’m doing, you got that?’
Angie glared at him, daring him to break the stare first. ‘I’ll see you back at home,’ she said quietly, ending this before it got to some place it didn’t need to be.
‘Yeah.’ He backed off. ‘Yeah. You will.’
Angie watched him leave, waiting until she heard his bike roar off out of the compound before she sat down at the desk, opening every draw and rummaging about inside, not knowing what the hell she was looking for, or why she was even doing this. If Tay was hiding something he certainly wouldn’t have hidden it in the desk she sat at almost every day.
‘Something up?’
Angie turned to look at the doorway, smiling at Lexi. ‘No, honey.’ She stood up, walking over to her daughter, reaching out to tuck a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear. ‘You look beautiful, baby. You going somewhere?’
Lexi’s eyes dropped to the floor, her hands in the pockets of her skinny jeans. ‘Mum, I…’
Angie tilted up Lexi’s chin, forcing her to look at her. ‘Something you want to tell me, darlin’?’
Lexi closed her eyes, breathing in deep. There was this huge, aching part of her that wished she had one of those relationships with her mum that meant she could tell her everything. Because this burden she carried around with her constantly was growing heavier with each day that passed. ‘No. No, I just… I just wondered why you were still here. You working late?’
Angie shook her head.
‘Anyway, I… I’d better go.’
‘Why don’t you pop into the clubhouse? A few of the boys are in there… if you’ve got no other plans, I mean.’
Lexi folded her arms against herself as she remained in the doorway. ‘Why aren’t we talking about it, Mum?’
Angie looked at her daughter, frowning slightly. ‘Talking about what, baby?’
‘About the eight years I was away.’
Angie turned to busy herself tidying the desk, her back to Lexi. ‘You know how it works, Lexi. The past is the past. It’s time to move on now.’
‘Are you glad I’m back?’
Angie turned around, her eyes once more meeting Lexi’s. ‘You have no idea how happy I am that you’re home.’
Lexi threw her mum a small smile, folding her arms tighter against herself. ‘I’m gonna go grab a drink in the clubhouse. You coming?’
Angie shook her head. ‘I’ve just got a couple of things to finish up here then I’m gonna head off home.’
> ‘Okay.’ Lexi turned to go, but then turned back around. ‘Aren’t you in the least bit curious about the time I spent in England? What I was doing over there, about Dad, about anything, it just… it feels a bit weird, acting as though I was never really away.’
‘It’s the past, Lexi.’ Angie tried to keep her voice steady, because she was absolutely sure now that her daughter wasn’t going to leave this alone. ‘And the past isn’t important. You’ve left England behind now, and you’re back home. Whatever happened over there…’
‘Shane’s death?’
Angie’s eyes stared into her daughter’s for a few, long seconds before she spoke again. ‘Whatever happened over there, it’s done. We move on.’
Did they? Is that what they did? Just move on and forget anything that might just have affected the rest of their lives? ‘Do you wish I’d come back sooner?’ Lexi whispered, still holding her mother’s gaze.
‘You shouldn’t have stayed away that long.’
‘So why didn’t you do something about that, Mum?’
Angie’s gaze didn’t waver, her voice calm and controlled. ‘It was your decision to make, Lexi.’
Lexi gave a low laugh, looking down at her boots before she raised her head to meet her mother’s eyes once more. ‘Yeah. It was my decision.’
Angie watched as her headstrong daughter walked off towards the clubhouse. She was hiding something, Angie knew that. It was obvious. And whether that was something she just wasn’t ready to tell her own mother yet, or whether it was something that could have major repercussions on all of them, she didn’t know. And she didn’t know if she ever wanted to.
***
Lexi slid up on to a stool at the bar, picking up a coaster and turning it round and round between her fingers, a nervous habit she appeared to have picked up since arriving back here.
‘You want a beer?’
Revolution (The Lone Riders MC Series Book #1) Page 8
