Eventually she reached the top of his slacks, and she looked up at him from where she lay half over him. Jerith was watching her, and when she looked up he blew his breath out in a frustrated sigh, shaking his head and closing his eyes. “I have the biggest mouth,” he said, making Nicolette laugh lightly as she undid his pants. A few minutes later, Jerith wouldn’t have cared if Pearl Harbor happened all over again. He learned one important thing about Nicolette Harris that evening—not to challenge her unless he wanted to lose.
She made love to him that evening, surprising him with her provocative side. Although her wild side surprised him, he found that like her job, he liked it as part of her. Later that night they lay on the bed together. She was half sitting up against the headboard, with his head resting on her stomach. She stroked his hair, her nails lightly grazing his scalp.
“I love this,” he said softly.
“What?” she asked, her voice just as quiet.
“Being here with you. Laying here like this… the feel of your hands in my hair… everything.” He sounded very melancholy. They only had one more day of their vacation left.
“That’s a lot,” she said, grinning in the semi-darkness.
He shrugged. “There’s a lot I love about being with you—what can I say?”
“So what happens when the vacation’s over?” she said quietly. She wasn’t sure she wanted to know.
Jerith was quiet for a while. He didn’t even want to think about leaving her to go back to LA. “Well, I gave Billy a month to straighten herself out. So when we get back, I’ll still be around for two weeks or so…”
“And then we go back to reality,” she said, sighing. She felt angry all of a sudden.
“Are you mad?”
She was quiet for a long moment, then sighed again. “Yes, I am.”
“At me?” He didn’t understand.
“No, not really at you,” she said tentatively. Then she nodded. “Yes, actually, I am mad at you.”
Jerith sat up and looked down at her, his face showing his confusion. “Why?”
Nicolette closed her eyes, mad at herself now for ruining this time for them, but knowing she had to try and explain now. “I guess because now you’ve shown me so much, and I’ve enjoyed it, and now it’s going to end. It’s like being given a governor’s reprieve from a death sentence but finding out you’re still spending the rest of your life in jail.”
“Is that all?” Jerith said, sounding relieved. Nicolette gave him a sharp look, to which he held up his hands. “Babe, wait! I didn’t mean it the way it sounded,” he said, almost laughing. “I meant that nothing is ending. I told you before, I want to be with you. Remember the ‘LA’s not another planet’ conversation?”
“Yes, but nothing’s changed. I still have to go back to work, and you have an album to work on. We won’t see each other, there’ll be groupies—it sucks,” she said, surprising him with her vehemence.
“We’ll see each other, Nick. I promise. And you know how I feel about groupies,” he said, stroking her cheek.
“Yeah, right.”
“Hey! Have I lied to you yet?”
“Not that I know of,” she said stubbornly, not willing to give in just yet.
“Come on now.” He leaned down to kiss her.
“No,” she said mulishly, but Jerith could see the beginnings of a smile on her lips.
He kissed her again. This time his lips lingered on hers, his hands trailing up to hold the sides of her face gently. He continued to kiss her until he felt her smile. “I don’t want anyone but you, Nick,” he whispered against her lips. “And I’ll move mountains to see you. I promise.”
She nodded then, and moved to rest her head against his shoulder, nuzzling his neck with her lips. Jerith lay back against the headboard, drawing her with him. She lay with her head against his shoulder, her hand resting on his chest. His arm was around her shoulders, his free hand reaching up to stroke her hair and cheek. They lay like that for hours. Occasionally he would move to kiss her gently on the forehead. Nicolette couldn’t remember feeling so relaxed with a man, and Jerith couldn’t think of anything but being with her. He knew that despite his confident words, things were going to be a lot harder once he went back to LA.
****
Billy Montague was sure she was going to go crazy if she stayed at the center much longer. They were making her nuts with their constant questions. They wanted her to talk about herself, her childhood, her relationship with her mother, what had happened to her with her mother’s numerous boyfriends. Worst of all, they wanted her to talk about Skyler. They wanted her to tell them how she felt about him, how she’d felt when they’d been together ten years before, how she’d felt when he’d left, and how she felt now. Billy didn’t want to talk to them about it. She didn’t want to think about most of it, but they kept badgering her. She’d said a lot while she was going through withdrawals the first couple of days, and they’d obviously recorded it in some way or another, because they kept bringing things up that she had said.
“Do you really hate Skyler Kristiani?” the doctor was asking her for the millionth time. Billy looked back at the man, her blue eyes taking in the wrinkled collar of his shirt under his light sweater. Dr. Ben Houser was a mousy-looking guy, with brown hair, brown eyes, and glasses. There was absolutely nothing noteworthy about the man except the wrinkled collar.
“You married, Doc?” she asked.
“Why do you ask?” the doctor said, taken aback.
“’Cause if you are, your wife is a lousy housekeeper.” She shook her head ruefully.
“I see, and why would that be?”
Billy reached out and flipped up his collar, causing him to jump. “She can’t iron for shit.” Then she leaned back on the couch she was sitting on, giving the doctor a seductive look. “She good in bed, at least?”
“I… Ms. Montague, I don’t think…”
Billy was laughing now. She could see that she was getting to him, and she enjoyed the game. “Oh, Doc, lighten up. I won’t jump you right here in front of God and everybody,” she said, grinning her infamous grin.
The doctor was so shocked by what she was saying, he didn’t even move when she got up and walked away. All the way down the hall to her room, Billy congratulated herself. Sucker, she thought. As far as she was concerned, if the guy let her get to him so easily, he deserved to suffer. Sitting in her room, Billy evaluated her situation. She did feel better now that all the cocaine was out of her system. She knew there was a lot of emotional stuff going on inside her, but she didn’t think she needed to talk to anyone about it. Billy Montague had always been her own person; she didn’t need anyone, never had, never would. She thought about the phone call she’d made to Skyler the night before. She felt like an idiot. She’d had a moment of weakness and had wanted to hear his voice, but the minute she had, she’d heard all the voices of the people at the center, telling her she was too reliant on him, that she was using him as a crutch and that if she didn’t break free of him, she’d never really be over her addiction. That’s when she’d choked up and hung up on him.
Billy lay back on her bed, allowing herself to think about Skyler. It bothered her no end that she missed him like crazy. She missed his voice, his eyes, his lips, his hands, everything about him. She wanted nothing more at that moment than to feel his arms around her and to smell his cologne as he held her. Billy knew she was being stupid, and she knew she needed to talk to Skyler. He needed to know everything. He needed to know how she felt, and what she wanted. It made her feel all the more desperate to get out of the hospital. She had to talk to him, but she wanted it to be face to face. She needed some answers to her questions. The walls of the room seemed very confining suddenly, and she knew her body was craving cocaine. She hopped off the bed and walked down the hall and out the back door to the center.
The rehabilitation facility was located in the foothills, and had a beautiful view of snow-covered mountains from the grounds. The center was
surrounded by woods, and Billy had found herself walking in them quite often in the last two days—every time her body craved the drug that had landed her there, which was still pretty often. She walked until her legs wouldn’t carry her anymore, then sat down on a rock. Billy’s heart was beating so hard in her ears, she didn’t hear the person come up behind her. She all but jumped out of her skin when two hands came around her waist. They tightened and turned her around.
“Alan! Jesus Christ!” she said, moving from his grasp and standing up. “What are you doing here?”
“That asshole of a boyfriend of yours wouldn’t let me talk to you, so I found out where the place was and waited for a chance to see you,” Alan said, his tone matter-of-fact. His eyes traveled over her body appreciatively. “You look pretty good to me—what’s this addict crap?”
“I am an addict, Alan,” Billy said, moving to sit on the rock again.
“You’ve let that jerk Kristiani tell you that.” He sat down next to her. “You do some coke—who doesn’t?”
“Look, Alan, I really don’t need your kind of cheering up right now, so why don’t you just go and harass Kid for a while.”
“Well, I’d like to,” Alan said, his tone as companionable as ever, “but he’s gone off on a vacation with some broad. All Tommy’ll tell me is that he went to Hawaii.” He looked pointedly at Billy to gauge her reaction, then continued. “Nice of him to take a vacation while you rot in this place,” he said disparagingly.
Billy didn’t reply, knowing that Alan was baiting her, but she was angry all the same. Jerith had gone to Hawaii and was apparently unreachable—he wasn’t even around if she needed him. It dragged at her, and started eroding her feeling of accomplishment. Suddenly the need for cocaine was screaming at her again, but she tamped down on the urge. In an effort to ignore her body’s craving she turned to Rothe. “So, why’d you want to see me?” she asked lightly.
“I wanted to make sure my star was alright. You know I worry about you.”
“You worry about your commission,” Billy retorted playfully.
“That’s not true, Billy, and you know it. You’re my girl, and I have to keep an eye on you, or you’ll do something crazy.”
“Yeah.” Billy made a sour face. “Well, where the hell were you four nights ago?”
“Why? What happened?” He looked concerned. Billy knew better, but somehow it didn’t matter right now.
“Never mind,” she said, looking up at him with her big blue eyes. “How was your vacation?”
“It was good, real good. But tell me about this Kristiani guy—who the hell is he?” Alan asked, wanting to know what he was up against.
Billy made a face. “He’s an old ghost from my past.” She shrugged. “No big deal.”
“But he stuck you in here.”
“Yeah,” Billy said, narrowing her eyes. “He’s a fucking narc. What do you expect?”
“So he really is a cop…” Alan said, mostly to himself.
“Oh yes, he is.” Billy nodded. “Did he threaten you?”
“No,” Alan said, his tone changing. “In fact, I had to remind him about you. He seemed really distracted when I called…” He trailed off, as if there was more he wanted to say but he’d thought better of it.
“Was there a woman there?” Billy asked, suddenly looking intense.
Alan was slow in answering. He shrugged. “I heard another voice in the background, telling him to hurry up,” he said, again allowing her to draw her own conclusions. He could see her mind clicking away. He was actually surprised when she turned her blue eyes up to his and he saw a seductive look there. He’d been interested in sleeping with her for the entire time he’d been Billy and the Kid’s manager, but he’d never crossed the line before. He’d waited for a signal from Billy. He was pretty sure he was seeing that signal now.
“So you came all the way here to make sure I was okay?” she said wistfully.
“Yes, I did.”
“Well,” she said, putting her arms around his neck and moving her body close to his. “Maybe you should check me out thoroughly then, to make sure I’m okay.”
Alan couldn’t think of anything to say. In fact, he couldn’t think at all, so intense was his reaction to her. He leaned down to kiss her and found her waiting for him. They had sex in the woods, and he left feeling very high. Billy went back to her room and took an extremely long, hot shower, feeling very disgusted with herself. When she got back to her room, she really wanted to call Skyler. She ended up yanking the phone cord out of the wall to keep herself from giving in. She was sure he was with Theresa again, and she hated him for it.
****
Skyler was in his office working at the computer when he heard the door open. He assumed it was one of the pilots, so he didn’t turn around right away.
“There’s something I never thought I’d see,” Theresa said from behind him.
Skyler turned around then, a pencil between his teeth. He looked at her with surprise in his light green eyes. He reached up and pulled the pencil from his mouth. “Terry, what’re you doin’ here?”
She smiled. “I came to take you to lunch.”
“Lunch, huh?”
Theresa leaned against the door jamb. “Lunch.”
Skyler looked at his watch, surprised that it was late enough for lunch already, then back at his ex-wife. “And what is it you thought you’d never see?” he said, belatedly remembering her first comment.
“You working on a computer,” she said, grinning at him.
He shrugged. “Gotta get into the twenty-first century sometime.”
“I guess. So can you break away?”
“Yeah, hold on a minute.” He turned back to the computer. Theresa watched him from the doorway. She was still amazed at the changes in him. She told him about her feelings when they were in his car twenty minutes later.
“You’ve changed a lot, Skyler.”
“Have I?” he said, surprised by her statement.
“Oh God, yes.” She grinned over at him. “You’re so much more relaxed now, not so wound up all the time.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he said, but there wasn’t any anger in his voice.
“I mean, you used to be so set in your ways and your schedules. If anything came along to throw your plans off, you weren’t happy for hours on end. God, I remember when plans would get changed and I’d dread telling you because I knew it would send you into a fit. You hated to have anything alter or be unpredictable. I was sure you’d blow a gasket with the kids. That’s why I always took care of them—I knew you’d go nuts.”
Skyler glanced over at her, looking chagrined. “I was that bad, huh?”
“I can’t even begin to tell you. But you’ve changed now. I mean, like today, I showed up unannounced and changed your schedule, and you didn’t even bat an eyelash. Or last week when you ended up spending the whole day working on my car, or when your friend called you on your way to work, it didn’t even seem to faze you that things weren’t going as planned.” She sounded amazed.
Skyler didn’t say anything for a long moment, then nodded. “I think it was the heart attack that changed that. I guess I just decided life was too short to try and control everything.”
“Well, I like it,” Theresa said, smiling over at him. “How are you, anyway?”
He shrugged. “I’m okay.” He knew she was referring to the Billy situation. “She’s only called me once since she was there, last night. She didn’t even talk to me—she ended up hanging up, telling me she’d call back because she’d awakened me. It was weird.”
“Well, that wasn’t the only weird call she made, Skyler.”
Skyler glanced over at her. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, she called me last night too.”
“Why?” he said, suddenly looking worried. He didn’t want Billy badgering Theresa.
“I’m not really sure. She asked me about you. She wanted to know if I had threatened you into leaving her ba
ck in the old days. Is that what you told her?” she asked, sounding upset at the thought.
Skyler sighed. “No. I told her I couldn’t cheat on you anymore, and that I needed to try and make our marriage work. I’m sorry, Terry. I didn’t want you involved in this.”
“It’s okay, Skyler. I am involved, whether I like it or not. I just didn’t want to think that you had lied to both of us, you know.”
“I didn’t lie to you,” Skyler said, his voice even but not angry. “You knew I was seeing other women—I never hid it. It may have been an asshole way of handling things, but at least it was honest.”
Theresa didn’t say anything for a long time. She was thinking about what he had said. He was right—he hadn’t lied to her. If she had ever been brave enough to ask him where he was going, he had always said, “Where do you think?” with a look that said everything. She’d finally stopped asking—it had hurt too much—but she hadn’t been willing to lose him either.
“Billy was different though, wasn’t she?” she said finally.
Skyler looked over at his ex-wife, surprised by her question. “Why do you say that?”
“I could tell she was different by the way you acted. That’s why I finally confronted you about your screwing around. I was terrified.” Skyler didn’t reply; he only looked at her, waiting for her to explain. “I was afraid that you’d actually leave me for her. You were so much more distant when you were with her, and much angrier too. I remember the fights we had when you were seeing her. The littlest thing would set you off, and you’d end up storming out of the house and tearing off in this car,” she said, gesturing. “I was afraid that you’d either leave me or manage to kill yourself in this thing.”
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