by Charles Dean
“No, no I insist,” Ramon said and continued filling the glass despite Lee’s protest. “Ling often works here when we get too many tourists, so she’s like a daughter to me in a way. If she had gone missing like those other villagers, I don’t know what I would have done.”
“Those other villagers?” Miller suddenly seemed much more interested in the conversation than he had been a second before. “Have other villagers gone missing too?”
“Yeah . . .” Ramon frowned. “They’ve been plaguing our village for weeks. We’ve tried to hunt them down when someone goes missing, but each time we send out a militia or brave new adventurers, they always come back without a single clue as to where the bandits are taking their victims. At this rate, we’re worried we’ll never be free of them. Around this town, you’re a hero. You’re the first one to stop one of their little kidnapping parties.”
“But there can’t be more than one bandit party, can there? We killed them, so it should be fine now, right?” Miller asked anxiously.
Lee felt his heart begin to race as he realized the trap that Miller was going to walk straight into if this barkeeper offered them a quest.
I know it’ll seem rude, but . . . Quick! How do I get out of the party? Lee asked his AI prompt-generating assistant. Get me out of this party before he accepts another quest! Lee’s heart started beating even faster.
Error: As a non-party-leading NPC, you are not allowed to generate new party invite requests. You cannot leave the existing party until you reject a quest that the party leader accepts.
So, I’ve uncovered another penalty to being an NPC. Lee sighed. But at least this means I’ll be fine if I reject the quest as Ramon gives it out.
“We estimate there are dozens more holed up in some secret base that none of us have been able to locate. Unless someone can track them down, find their camp and clear it out, we’re going to be dealing with them for a long time to come. It’s just a shame no one can sniff them out.”
Lee braced himself for Miller’s inevitable reply, and he wasn’t the least bit disappointed.
“That’s no problem at all! Our friend here, his god can find anything! Isn’t that right, Lee?” Miller asked, turning to look at him.
Lee stared mutely at his burdensome groupmate.
“We’ll take on the challenge! We’ll find their base and let you guys know where it is in no time. With Lee and his god, Augustus, this won’t be difficult at all!”
‘Well, actually, I’m afraid I’m going to have to turn down your request this time,’ is what Lee wanted to say in reply. In fact, that’s what he thought he was saying as soon as his mouth opened. But no sooner did he try to push the words out than an entirely different string of words exited his mouth and a new prompt let him know why.
Your Courage has prevented you from turning down a quest due to cowardice.
“I could not, in good faith, stand idly by and watch more people get killed without helping” were the words that left Lee’s mouth instead. I’ve been had! Lee cursed as he felt the constraints of being an NPC weigh on him even more. The fact he could feel Ethan, who probably knew his thoughts as well as he knew the tiny, clay mouse’s, giggling away at his suffering didn’t help matters either.
Wait, it failed to let me reject it out of cowardice, but that doesn’t mean I can’t turn it down for other reasons.
“There’s just one problem,” Lee began. “I’m afraid that I don’t have the power to help you right now even if I wanted to lend a hand.”
Your continuous manipulation of words to bend the truth has increased your skill in Deceit by 1. Deceit improves the likelihood of successfully lying to others. Current total: 1.
“What do you mean? Are you worried they’ll be too powerful and kill us? After our last fight, don’t you have faith that justice will carry us through to victory?”
Miller’s confidence clearly bordered on the level of being a mental handicap. Lee put a hand on the other man’s large shoulder and said, “I have no doubt that we can, through wit”—he felt the need to stress the possibility of using underhanded methods so Miller didn’t get the wrong idea—“overcome any obstacle. I’m just afraid that I have already burdened my god to help out those not of his faith in this town twice already, and he might not hear my request a third time.”
Ramon and Miller’s faces both fell flat as Lee finished. Lee was positive that they were both cursing this ‘silly superstition’ and grumbling at Lee’s overt push to gain extra followers.
“So, you’re saying we need to pray as well, or you might not help us?” Miller asked.
“I’m saying you need to pray, or he might not help us,” Lee corrected. “Through faith, all things are made.” Lee did his best impression of a priest, remembering the sermons he had heard when he was dragged to church as a child.
“I . . . umm . . . I’ll get around to that,” Ramon said hesitantly, clearly brushing it off.
Miller, however, wasn’t so quick to dismiss it all. “Do I have to worship him? If not, then I’ll pray with you if you’re positive it will help us find the bandits,” Miller readily agreed. “I just . . . I don’t know anything about your god, so I don’t think I can worship with you, but can I pray with you?”
“Hmm . . .” Lee was happy with his proselytizing success—emotional blackmail over potential harm to the villagers seemed to be way more effective than just kindly asking people to join his religion—but he also didn’t want to have to get into the nitty-gritty of Augustus’ doctrine. “How about you just give the religion a starting try and read this book tonight when we’re done drinking,” Lee suggested, handing him the text. “Just remember to return it to me in the morning.”
“Okay.” Miller nodded as he looked at the book solemnly. “I’ll consider your church if it means we can save those villagers.”
You have accepted the quest: Save the Villagers from the Kidnapping Threat. In order to complete this quest, the originating point of the threat must be eliminated. Due to villager expectations, a reputation penalty will occur if the quest is not completed within one week.
“That’s rather noble of you,” Ramon said, passing yet another beer over to Miller. “The Herald that came in here two months back didn’t leave anything for anyone but a few good stories.”
As Lee and Miller talked, which mostly involved Miller bragging about courageous and valorous achievements of other people whose names Miller seemed to expect Lee to know, Lee couldn’t help but overhear conversations around the room. It wasn’t like he was trying to eavesdrop and invade the privacy of other tables, it was just that their conversations were infinitely more interesting than Miller’s rather dry recounting of the time ‘the noble Blaise, Scottie and Travis’ conquered some other world.
However, he was rather glad he was listening in on those around him as his ears caught more and more information about the world from players who weren’t aware an NPC would be paying attention to them. One conversation was particularly edifying.
“I’m so glad this new server came up just a month before I died on the other one. I would hate to restart from level one again while even the noobs were over fifty,” the voice, belonging to a short, thin, pointy-eared man the AI identified as belonging to the Leprechaun race.
“Yeah, but that’s why they establish a new world every year for new players and us rerolls,” his buddy, another Firbolg like Miller responded.
So, it’s not a brand-new game. It’s just a brand-new server, and death isn’t just as simple as respawning. If you die, you start over. That’s good to know. He felt somewhat relieved. He didn’t like the idea that death had penalties in a video game, but if he had to suffer an awful death penalty, they needed to as well. Lee hated the idea that he might get in a feud with a player and kill him only to have to spend the rest of his life in this game worrying about the player coming back and seeking vengeance. At least now he could take comfort in the fact that every level he gained would be that much greater of a distanc
e between him and any player he loosed from his mortal coil. Still, why does it work like that? Who would sink months into a game when a single death could put them back at square one? Most MMO players and RPG fanboys avoided hardcore games at all cost.
Lee continued listening, hoping to find an answer, but the rest of the information was about where to buy weapons, great places to shop for armors, and the continuous griping about shows and stories from a real world that Lee had no idea about. Other than the fact that wherever the players came from was leagues ahead of Lee’s own home world in technology, it didn’t seem like the people were that different culturally.
Miller’s notice of departure snapped Lee back to his own conversation. “Alright,” he said with a yawn, “let’s get some sleep and tackle this bandit quest first thing in the morning.”
“Yeah, sounds good,” Lee agreed.
Ramon popped by with perfect timing, handing Lee an old-fashioned bronze key. “Here,” he said, passing him the key. “Room number four is open.”
There couldn’t have possibly been more than ten rooms in the entire building, and Lee was easily able to find the room on the second floor. The room was quiet despite the noise below, but it felt cold and damp compared to the central room, and there were only two lit candles giving off illumination. He half-expected there to be either a stone slab or a coarse straw bed for him to sleep on, so he was pleasantly surprised to find a nice queen-sized mattress. It lacked any spring or bounce, and it definitely wasn’t made of foam, but it was heaven after walking around all day in leather office shoes. Shoes. That’s exactly what I need to get first thing in the morning: shoes for walking, Lee thought as he slid his loafers off of his feet and laid back on the bed.
He had thought that, given his circumstances, all that he had gone through and the fact that he was so far away from his actual home, he wouldn’t get any sleep. Whether it was the beers he had managed to consume during his evening with Miller or the three life-or-death encounters he had managed to endure in the last twenty-four hours, something had racked his nerves to exhaustion, and sleep seemed to come easily. Now that he was finally alone, feeling safe with no pressure at all, relief washed over him like a cold wave and he found himself entering sand land faster than he ever had in his real bed.
——-
Lee awoke in the middle of the night to a loud, insistent, mouse squeaking inside his head. The incessant series of chips and shrills pulled him to consciousness with a sense of urgency, and it took Lee a moment to figure out where he was and what was going on as he pushed away the thick fog of confusion caused by sleep and too much alcohol. Little Ethan sounded off again, and Lee picked up the gist of what the small mouse was trying to tell him: danger.
What the hell is going on? Lee immediately sat up in bed as quietly as he could and clutched one hand to his head. He was a little slow coming to his senses, but he urged the mouse to tell him more anyway. Rather quickly, he learned that there were two men outside of his room working on picking the lock. Ethan’s ears were sharp enough to hear their conversation on the other side of the door with such clarity that Lee might as well have been wearing headphones and listening to a tape of their discussion.
“You sure this is his room?” one of them said in a hushed tone.
“Yeah, positive,” a second voice replied quietly. “The guy got his drinks for free all night, the NPCs were talking about him, and he apparently cleared out some bandits.”
“So, you think he got a fat reward and hasn’t spent any of it?”
“Exactly. Are you sure you can pick that? Come on, man, this is supposed to be in and out. I don’t want to get caught and have our faces flagged.”
“Relax. Everyone is asleep. He’s probably asleep too. We can just throw a pillow over his head, get the EXP, take the loot and be out of here in no time. Hold on. Almost got it.”
You can’t kill people with the pillow. It’s too . . . Never mind. Lee wanted to correct the idiot on the other side of the door, but at least the guy’s mistake let him know the fool was a player. Anyone who actually tried using a pillow to suffocate someone would figure out that it was made from far too breathable a material to stop someone from breathing. Even if it were usable for the purpose, it would take a lot longer than most people realized.
Lee shook his head and tried to clear away the last bit of fog that was still hanging on. He was at a bit of a loss as for what to do. The penalty for being inebriated was still in effect, and the reduced coordination and reflex were going to be a serious hindrance in a fight. He looked around the room for anything that he could use and noticed that the two candles burned down to about a quarter left and came up with an idea.
I hope a mouse’s night vision is good. Lee quietly stepped out of bed blew out both candles. Once the room was plunged into total darkness, he hurriedly stuffed a pillow under the bed covers so that it looked like someone was still sleeping there—a cheesy tricked he had always wanted to try after watching equally cheesy 90’s movies. After that, he spread out one of the large wolf hides on the floor in front of the door and then positioned himself against the wall so that when the door opened he would be hidden behind it.
Is there a way to communicate with my party members without being right next to them? He was hoping that the AI assistant would give him a response, but there was only a total lack of silence in return. Ugh. I guess the only point of having a party is to share experience and loot . . . and so that I can be forced into accepting awkward quests by a goodie two shoes with a hero complex.
“Got it!” one of the two men on the other side of the door exclaimed.
The door edged open a few very tense few seconds later, and a bit of light flickered into the room from a dimly lit candle that one of them must have been carrying. Lee was immediately thankful for the small bit of illumination. Even though he now instinctively knew that Ethan needed far less light than a normal mouse to see by, that small bit let him know exactly where they were without using his golem’s eyes.
The two men quietly crept into the room and then stopped just inside the doorway. Because of the way he had positioned himself behind the door, there was no way that either of the two could see him where he was hidden unless they turned around and looked directly at him.
“I don’t see him. Is he under the bed?” the human asked his companion, a Firbolg holding the candle. Lee’s pillow trick apparently hadn’t fooled anyone.
“Could be. He mi—” the Firbolg started to answer, but Lee was already in motion. He yanked back on the wolf hide as hard as he could and tried to pull it out from underneath them. Unfortunately, his little trick didn’t work exactly as planned. Even though they were both caught off guard and thrown off balance, neither of them actually fell to the floor like he had hoped. Instead, they both kept their balance and turned to face Lee.
Lee instantly gave up on reattempting his plan a second time and moved straight to the backup. He pulled out his sword and swiped it at the Firbolg’s candle as quickly as he could. Despite the fact that his coordination was terrible from drinking, he was still at least partially successful. Rather than catching the candle and knocking it away as he intended, he managed to cut into the Firbolg’s arm and cause him to drop the candle. It hit the floor with a muffled clang, and the wax that had been collecting on the tray splashed over the flame and snuffed out the wick.
“Light!” one of them shouted.
Without any real source of light, both of the two men were at a serious disadvantage. Even though there was only a small sliver of light leaking into the room from a crack in one of the shuttered windows, Lee was able to see what was going on through the mouse’s eyes because of his telepathic link to Ethan and the innate bond they shared through the Golem Sculpting skill.
Lee quickly lashed out again with a second horizontal slash and felt his blade cut into what he assumed was the Firbolg’s abdomen. The Firbolg screamed out in pain as Lee’s blade bit into his midsection and began to wildly wave a clu
b through the air. Lee stepped back a half-step and easily avoided the series of blind attacks. It was obvious the Firbolg was blind from how badly the blows had been aimed, and he had clearly been taking wild swipes hoping to get lucky.
As soon as he saw an opening in the Firbolg’s attacks, Lee lunged forward and simultaneously jammed his shoulder into the Firbolg’s ribs and his blade into the man’s stomach. The sword refused to penetrate all the way into the man’s gut due to the robber’s hit points, but the blade dug in far enough to do some serious damage.
“Are you okay? Where are you? Just tackle him! Grab him! If we can’t see in the dark, then he can’t either!” the human opponent barked over at his Firbolg buddy.
The desperate Firbolg took the other man’s advice tried to grab onto Lee. Two massive arms swung around to grab ahold of Lee, but with Lee’s sword between them, the larger man couldn’t get a good grip. Lee pushed forward for the second time and the two toppled onto the floor. Propelled forward by his body weight, Lee’s blade plunged even deeper into Firbolg’s gut, and at last, he finally saw the prompt he had been hoping for:
Your party has killed the player NoobSlayer. Your party has been awarded 92 copper, one pair of leather pants and 105 Experience. Your share of this is 46 copper, one pair of leather pants and 53 Experience.
One down, one to go, Lee thought as he rolled off his first victim.
“Where are you? Come on!” the human growled, slashing at the air randomly with a dagger as he slowly edged back toward the door. “Come and get me, you bastard!”
You break into my room and try to kill me for my crap? There is no way you’re getting away scot-free! Lee cursed the man under his breath as he tried to tug his sword free. Crap! Lee was forced to roll sideways and slide off the corpse as the midnight assassin’s wild knife attacks came too close to his head for comfort. He landed on the floor with a thud and immediately began scrambling to his feet, but he knew from Ethan’s eyes that the human had turned toward the sword of the noise. The man jumped forward and lashed out with low horizontal slashes, narrowly missing Lee. Now-unarmed, Lee scrambled back toward the bed and ducked behind one of the short, chest-high bedposts.
