Strong-Willed Cowboy (The Buckskin Brotherhood Book 5)

by Vicki Lewis Thompson, Stephanie Bond

  “On Monday we’ll check out the post-nup. Will that help?”

  “Probably. But do you see what I mean? Why I can’t sleep with you?”

  “I’m not talking about sleeping.”

  “Oh, for heaven’s sake, I know what you’re talking about. Sex.”

  “Making love.”

  “Same thing.”

  “If you believe that, then you really need to get educated on the subject. And I’m just the guy to teach you.”

  “You don’t see what a mistake that would be?”

  “No, I don’t. Enrique cheated on you and he left you with mountains of debt when he ran off to Mexico with his girlfriend. It goes without saying he didn’t love you. He never loved you.”

  “So he never loved me. So what?”

  “Have you ever had sex with a man who loved you?”

  “Probably not, and thank you kindly for pointing that out. Now I feel like a pathetic loser.”

  “That makes two of us.”

  She hesitated. “What do you mean?”

  “I started falling for you on day one. It’s been building for more than two years. When I compare how I feel about you to what I felt for the women I’ve had sex with, women I thought I loved… no comparison.”

  She took a shaky breath. “And I’m all wrong for you. I’m so sorry.”

  “About what? It’s not your fault that I’m in this deep. You’ve warned me and everyone on this ranch that you’d never marry again.”

  “And going to bed with you will only make things worse.”

  “It can’t get any worse. I have a chance to find out what it’s like to make love with a woman I really love. You’re denying me that chance. What’s worse than that?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “I don’t, either.” He opened his door. “I’ll get you down.” He took the time to grab the duffle out of the backseat. She might not wait for him to let her out.

  But she did. She put her hand in his although she didn’t meet his gaze. “Look, it’s late and we’re both tired.” She stepped to the ground and let go of his hand.

  “Speak for yourself. I’m wide awake.”

  “That’s adrenaline.” She started toward the porch steps.

  That’s love. “Are you saying we should sleep on it?”

  “I’m saying I want you to stay in Millie’s room.”

  “That was my plan. Mind if I borrow your toothpaste?”

  She glanced at him, gave him a small smile. “I don’t mind. You can have the bathroom first.”

  “Eager to get me tucked away for the night?”

  “Yes, I am.” She climbed the steps.

  “Out of sight, out of mind?”

  “I can only hope.”

  “Oh, you’re capable of a lot more than hope.” He crossed the porch so he could hold the screen door for her.

  She went inside the darkened cottage. “See you in the morning.”

  He came in behind her. “Technically, that begins one minute after midnight.” He closed and locked the door.

  “Not in this house.” She walked straight through the living room to the hall. “Goodnight, Rafe.” She went into her bedroom and closed the door with a soft click.

  He’d prepared for this scenario. He wasn’t thrilled with her response to his argument, but at least he’d made it.

  After her speech about feeling trapped, he had to face the truth. She had a phobia. And she might never get over it.

  Millie’s room used to have a king bed in it, one she’d bought for herself. Rafe had helped move it to the cabin Jake and Millie built in the woods near the raptor sanctuary. So now the old double bed was back where the king had been.

  After sleeping in a bunk that was too small for more than ten years, Rafe was used to accommodating himself to whatever sleeping conditions he’d been given. The double bed would afford him more room than his bunk since he could lie on the diagonal.

  The bedside table held a decent-sized lamp. A smaller one with a nightlight bulb sat on top of the dresser. He left that on and turned off the big lamp. If Kate came into the room, and that was doubtful, he wanted some illumination.

  Lying crossways on the bed meant the sheets and blankets were somewhat jacked, but he worked with them and managed to achieve coverage. The house was cool and he was naked, so coverage was a good thing.

  Well, not completely naked. He wore a ring, something he wasn’t accustomed to. Strange sensation, having that metal band around his third finger. He could take it off, but then he might lose it.

  He stretched out in the semi-darkness, heart pounding, and listened. Water ran in the bathroom. Bare feet whispered up and down the hall. He held his breath.

  She didn’t pause beside his open door, let alone step through it. Her door closed with a crisp snap of hardware. Again. He prided himself on his mental toughness. She was tougher.

  A wise man would get some rest, gather his strength for tomorrow. He stared into the darkness and willed her to come to him. Didn’t work worth a damn.

  Aunt Lilith was a pain in the ass and he wished she’d leave, but maybe not quite yet. When she was in residence, he had to sleep in the cottage, sleep being a relative term.

  It could mean actual sleep, or it could mean lying awake longing for Kate’s soft body. Or it could mean rolling around on this bed and making love until dawn. If given the chance, he’d choose Option C.

  Gradually the adrenaline pumping through his system found other things to do and he drifted into a grayish world of semi-reality. When a woman appeared in the open doorway, her curvy body clad in a filmy nightgown backlit by a baseboard light in the hall, he doubted his senses.

  He struggled toward full consciousness as the product of his imagination approached the bed.

  “That’s a weird way to lie in bed.”

  Sounded like Kate’s voice, but she was supposed to walk into his room saying things like I’m going crazy over there! or Take me, Rafe! Take me now!

  A critique of his sleeping position hadn’t been part of the fantasy. He fought off the urge to slide back into oblivion and sat up. “Kate?”

  “I couldn’t sleep, but clearly you’ve had no problem.”

  “I wasn’t asleep.”

  “The hell you weren’t. You had a little snore going on.”

  “Was it bad?”

  “Not so bad.” She moved closer to the bed. “While you were snoring, I was thinking.”

  “Oh?” Don’t get your hopes up, dude.

  “You’re right that I’ve never had sex with a man who loved me. Have you ever had sex with a woman who loved you?”

  Even half-asleep, he had that answer. “No.”

  “So you need this as much as I do.”

  “I’m not totally awake yet, but did you just say you love me?”

  “In a round-about way, yes, I did.”

  That cleared the cobwebs from his brain right quick. “You love me?”

  “Of course. Didn’t you—”

  “Absolutely not! I dreamed and I hoped, but I didn’t know. How could I? You turned me down flat in August.”

  “Well, I do, and you should have sex with a woman who loves you. Don’t you think?”

  “Kate, what’s happening here? I love you and you love me. We just got married. Why aren’t we doing it like bunnies and shouting hallelujah?”

  “Because I don’t want to be married to you, or anybody. And if we have sex, which I’m seriously considering—”

  “Thank God.”

  “I don’t want you to think that means I want to live with you. I never want to go through that again.”

  “Go through what?”

  “Cheating was the final straw, and leaving me in debt was awful, but our daily life was awful, too. Everything had to be his way.”

  “You didn’t see that coming?”

  “How could I? He courted me, took me to dinner, promised me the moon. But once he put a ring on my finger—” She held up her left hand. The ring
was still there. “Everything changed.”

  “So if I promise not to be a jerk, you won’t believe me.”

  “No.”

  “So why are you here?”

  “Because we love each other. We even like each other. And maybe… maybe we should get the chance to feel what it’s like to have that kind of sex, since Aunt Lilith’s forcing us to be in the same house.”

  His blood pumped faster and most of it was headed to a predictable destination. “And when she leaves?”

  “We quit while we’re ahead.”

  He groaned. “Kate…”

  “Okay, you’re right. It’s a terrible idea. I don’t know what I was thinking.” She turned and started for the door.

  He was out of bed, his hand gripping her arm before she’d taken two steps. “Don’t go.”

  “I have to. That groan was pitiful. You—”

  “I’ll do it.” He drew her close, dizzy with wanting her. “I’ll take that deal.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Caught in Rafe’s strong arms and pressed against his aroused body, Kate’s resistance crumbled. “Then kiss me. Make me forget this is a huge mistake.”

  “You bet.” His hungry mouth sought hers.

  With a whimper, she wrapped her arms around his broad back and hung on as he kissed her as thoroughly as he had in a forested glen two months ago. She’d ached for him then. And denied herself.

  But now… as he plunged his tongue into her mouth, as he cupped her bottom in his big hands and fit his hips to hers, she craved him more than air.

  Panting, she wiggled free and wrenched off her nightgown. “Get the—”

  “Yes, ma’am.” He crossed the room and unzipped the duffle.

  She tossed her nightgown on the floor. “You didn’t put them in the bedside table drawer?”

  “Seemed like tempting fate.” He ripped open a packet.

  She glanced at him—tall, muscular, big all over. As he rolled a condom over that bad boy, the clench of desire made her gasp. “You sure are tempting me.” She eyed the bed. “Too damned small.” She threw back the covers. “But mine’s no better.”

  “It’s what we’ve got.” He was beside her in two strides and swept her up in his arms. “We’ll do it crossways.” He laid her down gently, her head on the far pillow and her feet on the opposite corner.

  His gaze swept over her and he swallowed.

  She held out her arms. “Come here, you.”

  “Just lookin’.” His chest heaved. “You’re… I knew you’d be beautiful. That’s if I ever had the chance to…” His gaze met hers. “This better not be a dream.”

  “If it is, you’d better get to it before you wake up.”

  “Good point.” He moved over her, nudged her thighs farther apart and braced his weight on his forearms. “I still can’t believe you came to me.”

  She quivered in anticipation as she slid her palms up his furred chest. “I’ve wanted you for a long time, too. I’ve fantasized what you’d look like naked.”

  “I’ve fantasized you naked, too.” His gaze drifted to her breasts. “The reality is better.”

  “Way better. You’re like one of those Greek statues, but more generously endowed.”

  He smiled. “That’s why I’m gonna take it slow.”

  “I can handle you, Rafe Banner.”

  “I have no doubt.” He leaned down and feathered a kiss over her mouth as he settled into position. “But there’s no reason to hurry.”

  “That’s what you think. I’m liable to start this party without you if you don’t… oh, my.” She gulped as he eased slowly into her entrance. Closing her eyes, she savored the heat, the warmth, the snug fit. “That’s… a lot.”

  “I love you, Kate.”

  The low timbre of his voice sent a message straight to her core. She opened her eyes.

  “I love you.” He sank deeper.

  The intensity in his dark eyes stunned her into silence. Wrapping him in her arms, heart beating wildly, she surrendered. His thick cock claimed more territory, then more.

  The light in his eyes burned brighter. “I love everything about you—your voice, your laugh.” Leaning down, he kissed her again. “Even your stubbornness.”

  “I’m stub—”

  “But not too stubborn to cross the hall.” He eased in another fraction, kissed her again.

  She closed her eyes, awash in emotions stirred by the tenderness in his voice, the gradual, gentle blending of his body with hers.

  “I love that you beat me at poker. I love the way you dance.” He pushed once more and he was there, in full possession of her most intimate space.

  She dug her fingers into his muscled back as the solid length of him set off mini-explosions. She gulped. “Some… of me is… dancing… now.”

  “I know. I can feel it. I love you, Kate.” And he began to move.

  She sucked in a breath. “Holy Macarena.”

  He smiled and kept going.

  And she lost her mind. Crying out his name, she arched beneath him as waves of splendor crashed over her again and again. Best. Climax. Ever.

  He buried his cock deep and absorbed the shock waves. As they faded, he dragged in a breath. With a soft murmur of again, he began to stroke, increasing the pace.

  Helpless in the clutch of sensual pleasure, she hurtled toward the abyss a second time, panting and slick with sweat. Surging forward, he set off the explosion.

  She cried out and he echoed her cries. Gasping her name, his big body shook and shivered in the grip of his climax. She rode it out with him, holding on tight as he shuddered in her arms.

  Gently she stroked his back, her body sated, her heart full. “I love you.”

  Lifting his head, he met her gaze. “Tell me again.”

  “I love you, Rafe.”

  His chest heaved and he closed his eyes. When he opened them, they sparkled with happiness. “If I should die in the middle of the night—”

  “Which you won’t! Good grief.”

  “I know, but if I did, I’d be okay with that.”

  “Well, I wouldn’t!”

  “Are you saying you’d like me to stick around a little longer?”

  “I want you to stick around for a very long time. It’s just that we—” She stopped herself. Now wasn’t the time. “Would you… would you like some cocoa?”

  He laughed. “Sure, why not?”

  “I don’t know why I want cocoa, but—”

  “I do. Last December we had that big snowfall.”

  “And we built forts and had snowball fights. Followed by cocoa. And you almost kissed me under the mistletoe.”

  “And chickened out.”

  She stroked his cheek. “This makes up for it.”

  “Oh, I wouldn’t say that.” He grinned. “I think I need to make it up to you some more.”

  “After cocoa.”

  “Yeah, after cocoa.” He eased away from her. “Meet you in the kitchen.” He left the bed and headed for the bathroom.

  “FYI, I’m fetching my bathrobe,” she called after him.

  “Then I’ll put on my jeans,” he called back.

  She climbed out of bed, picked up her nightgown and hurried to her room to get her robe. She put it on as she walked to the kitchen. Flipping on the kitchen light, she washed her hands at the sink before starting the cocoa.

  Cocoa powder, sugar, a few teaspoons of water. She made cocoa the way her mom did. No instant for her. She was stirring the mixture into a dark syrup over low heat when Rafe came in dressed in his jeans. He’d put on his shirt, too, but left it unbuttoned.

  “Somehow I knew you’d add the shirt.”

  “Feels slightly more decent since we’ll be sitting in the kitchen. I don’t think I’ve ever seen that bathrobe.”

  “Why would you? You’re never here when I’m wearing it.”

  “Which seems strange, because I feel as if I know you so well, but—”

  “Now you know me better.”

&n
bsp; He grinned. “Yes, ma’am. But why the bathrobe and not the nightgown?”

  “I might as well be naked in that nightgown and working naked in the kitchen is weird.”

  “I guess the nightgown is sort of see-through. I didn’t get a good look at it, but it’s like something Beth would have in her shop.”

  “That’s where I bought it.”

  “Not to be nosy, but when?”

  She smiled. “None of your business.”

  “Did you buy it recently?” He walked up behind her and slid his arms around her waist.

  “I’m not telling.”

  He dipped his head and nibbled on her earlobe. “I have ways of making you talk.”

  Her breath hitched as warmth sluiced through her body. “Do you want cocoa?”

  “I thought I did.” He untied her robe as he nuzzled the side of her neck. “Do you want cocoa?”

  When he slipped his hand inside her robe and cradled her breast, she let the spoon fall against the side of the pan with a clatter. “Maybe… later.”

  Reaching around her, he switched off the burner. “I’m taking you back to bed.” Scooping her up, he carried her out of the kitchen and down the hall.

  She wound her arms around his neck. “I love it when you carry me.”

  “Always dreamed of doing it.”

  “So have I.”

  He glanced down at her and smiled. “I’m pretty heavy.”

  “Smart aleck.”

  “Did you buy that nightgown for me?”

  “You had your insurance policy. I had mine.”

  “But when?” He walked into the dim bedroom. “You had no time.”

  “Beth opens at nine. I didn’t have to be at Henri’s until ten.”

  He sat her on the edge of the bed. “Where is it?”

  “I took it back to my room.”

  “Where?”

  “On my bed. But why—”

  “If you bought it for me, I want to see it on you. In better light.” He gave her a quick kiss. “Be right back.”

  “Want me to rummage around in your duffle while you’re gone?”

  “Absolutely.”

  She walked over to the duffle, pulled out the box inside and carried it over to the bedside table. Opening the drawer, she dumped the contents, took one out and laid it beside the lamp.