by Ted Staunton
It was an easy job but I got a little thrill out of doing it in secret. I know it made Zal’s family happy. For me and Aunt Jenn, I think that was the biggest thrill of all.
APPENDIX ONE
Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse
The English section of the SI exam had two parts. One was paragraphs of a story, with blanks where you were supposed to guess and fill in the missing words. That was pretty easy. The other was an essay question, with three topics to choose from. Like I said, I picked Describe and explain the best way to survive the zombie apocalypse. This was something CC, Zal and I had talked over a lot.
I said you’d do best taking off for the woods in a team of three. You’d have one person who knew about wilderness survival, one fighter and one tech person for when you returned later to what remained of civilization. You’d need camp stuff, a gun and ammo, batteries, an axe, a shovel (both also good for chopping zombie heads off), a first-aid kit and lots of books to read while you waited.
And waiting is the key part. See, if you hid in the woods a few years, sooner or later there wouldn’t be any people left to either be zombie food or to make new zombies. This is important, because most people don’t realize it, but zombies don’t last forever. Since they’re already dead, they keep on rotting and bits fall off. Sooner or later, when enough bits have fallen off, they won’t be able to do anything. When there are no new ones and the old ones aren’t dangerous anymore, you just come out of the woods and sweep up. I got right into all that and had to hurry to finish at the end. Afterwards, we all got burgers for lunch.
I’m not saying it is super-genius stuff, but if you write the SI exam and that question turns up, feel free to use this. I’m pretty sure it helped me, and I hope it helps you too. And if you do get into SI, watch out for the tuna noodle hot lunch. Zal says Sergeant Castro was right.
APPENDIX TWO
Bad Bounce
Now that I have written something all the way to the end, I can tell you as an author that, for my money, the toughest part is figuring out where to start. Here are four different ways I tried to start Bad Bounce. I was also trying to sound like the writing in World’s Best, if it sounds different than my usual.
It wasn’t often that Inspector Chase of the Yard called on Nick Storm, so when When Carruthers the butler ushered him Inspector Chase into Nick’s sweet suite at Claridge’s, the great detective instantly knew at once that adventure was afoot.
Over the years, the master criminal Kendali, the king of crime, had stolen a king’s ransom in jewels, but no one had ever seen his face, only the mocking notes he left at the scenes of his astonishing crimes. Inspector Chase passed the newest one to Nick Storm. The keen-eyed detective read it and handed it to me. “What do you make of it, Fortune?”
At first glance it seemed all too oblivious: the alarm off, the broken glass of the museum display case strewed throughout the floor, with the broom of the caretaker who had been knocked cold during the robbery. The caretaker himself was nursing his battered brow and the priceless Lamar diamonds were gone. But Nick Storm’s sensitive detecting sense told him something was amiss. was wrong. wasn’t right.
Afterwards, when pressed to tell his tale at the Sleuth Club, Nick Storm would always say the whole case came down to knowing one word two things: Zectron. That and not being so good at a school game called and a game called wall ball.
If you can finish any of these, go for it. Like I said, Miss Linton is looking for a story for our class play, but I have a new idea I like better, with more action. I’m calling it The Green Pond Gator Mystery. It’s about three friends who rescue animals, only one is scared of dogs and one carries turtles in her pockets everywhere. First they get a giant anaconda out of a clothes dryer and then they wrangle a giant alligator in a city pond and try to figure out how it got there. The special effects could be spectacular. Good luck. See you at the beach.
Acknowledgements
For me, acknowledgements are always fun and frightening. It’s great to give a shout-out to everyone who helped, but I’m always scared I’m going to accidentally leave someone out. I’ll do my best not to mess up.
First off, I’d like to thank herpetologist extraordinaire Lee Parker, of Reptilia, in Vaughan, Ontario, who really did wrangle a caiman out of a pond in Toronto’s High Park, barehanded. Lee generously shared his knowledge and experiences, and parts of my story owe a lot to him. You can see Lee in action if you do a web search for “High Park Alligator.” Thanks also to his colleagues at Reptilia, who patiently answered many silly questions, including “what would happen if an anaconda swallowed a wad of twenty-dollar bills?” And still on this topic, I’d be more than remiss if I didn’t thank Michele McKenzie of Clearview Public Library for her energy and enthusiasm in connecting me with everyone at Reptilia. Her help really got things happening with this book.
Lee and company are the good guys in the reptile side of the story. The bad guy bits were inspired by news reports and a funny, fascinating book, Stolen Worlds, by Jennie Erin Smith, about the bizarre world of reptile smugglers and smuggling. It’s a fun read.
As for the bank robbery side, thanks to Kim Armstrong at my local bank branch for insight into what tellers are trained to do in a robbery, as well as numerous news stories, especially “The Last Ride of Cowboy Bob,” a moving piece of reporting by Skip Hollandsworth in The Best American Crime Writing 2006.
Over in the imagining corner, I have to mention Miss Linton, Miss Hart, Mr. Lowe, Mrs. Ross and all the other teachers at the real Park Lawn School, who did such cool, arts-based stuff with me and all their other students way back when, not to mention Mom and Dad for countless trips to the library, family stories (mostly true), and for visits to the long-vanished book and antique shop near Rice Lake — where I bought my four precious (and incredibly cheesy) time-capsule volumes of the ten-volume The World’s Best 100 Detective Stories with painstakingly saved paper-route money. Fifty cents a book. It seemed like a fortune, but it was a great investment.
Thanks also to Jeremy, Liz and Karla of Mabel’s Fables, in Toronto, who led me on an illuminating web search and discussion about bouncy balls, their history and related games one spring afternoon.
As for the nuts and bolts of writing and business, I’m again indebted to David Bennett for guiding this project safely into port at Scholastic. His story sense was a big help too.
Next, a huge thanks to my editor, Anne Shone, for her faith in this story, her insights and (not least) her humour. Anne has a way of making you write precisely what you thought you already had, but were really only gesturing at vaguely. If she’d edited that last sentence, for example, it would be a lot clearer. Thanks also to Aldo Fierro for a great cover, Erin Haggett for fastidious fact checking and attention to detail, and everyone on the Scholastic team for their energy, enthusiasm and talents in getting this book to you.
Last, but never least, thanks to Margaret and Will, who keep the bounce in my step and my heart.
About the Author
Ted Staunton is the prize-winning author of many books for young people, from long-time picture book favourite Puddleman, to young adult and middle-grade novels, including Who I’m Not and titles in the bestselling Seven series. He’s also a popular speaker who has performed and led workshops everywhere from Inuvik to Addis Ababa. When not writing stories, Ted writes music and plays in the Maple Leaf Champions Jug Band. Ted lives with his family in Port Hope, Ontario.
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Librar
y and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication
Staunton, Ted, 1956-, author
Bounced / Ted Staunton.
Issued in print and electronic formats.
ISBN 978-1-4431-5717-9 (paperback).—ISBN 978-1-4431-5718-6
(html)
I. Title.
PS8587.T334B68 2017 jC813’.54 C2016-906158-2
C2016-906159-0
Cover photos © iStockphoto: piggy bank (malerapaso), ball (twentyfourworks).
About the Author photo: Patricia McCaw
Copyright © 2017 by Ted Staunton.
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First e-book edition: February 2017
