“Won’t you sit down?” he said offering Candasee a seat at the boardroom table again. She sat and waited for him to continue.
“So should I assume that you no longer wish to hear what I have to say to you?” asked Darius sitting in the chair beside her.
Candasee took a deep breath before responding steeling herself against revealing what she truly felt.
“Darius, I never promised you that I would come up here and to tell you the truth, I think we’ve already said all we need to say to each other,” she replied with attempted nonchalance.
“I don’t believe that for a second Candasee. Your classes were over by two-thirty and you never called or left a message with my secretary, so I was left to guess and to wonder. Then I see you and Nathan arrive this morning looking...” he said as his voice trailed off as he took a deep exasperated breath.
If her skin was any lighter the blood that rose to her face would have made her redder than a beetroot.
“Darius what do you expect, Nathan’s my fiancé and I love him. We have a close relationship and he understands and loves me unlike anyone I know,” said Candasee, not knowing just how deeply her deliberate words wounded the heart of the man who sat before her. “Look, we would not even be having this conversation if we went to the Meridian hotel! Why are you still pushing this issue? Don’t you realize that I could be married with a child on the way by now? It’s been two years!”
“I realize that, but don’t you see that isn’t the way things worked out? We have a chance here to see what could be different between us. That kiss we shared yesterday should have been evidence enough of that for you!” he said.
“How do you expect me to just tell Nathan that I have to break up with him because I have to see if my ex-husband and I have any hope of patching up a relationship that we already tried and failed at making work!” she retorted. “That’s right Darius, this relationship was a failure and you know it! Let’s not dredge up the past anymore! Your stubbornness with this is hurting all of us. Let it go! Please!”
He had everything anyone could possibly dream of owning, he could articulate himself to close multi-million dollar deals, but Candasee left him tongue-tied and unsure of himself for the first time in his life. And to make matters worse she was fell in love with another man.
Darius stood quickly and walked away from Candasee, shoving his hands deep into his pockets and looking out over the ocean through the wall. He saw none of the landscape; in fact, nothing held any appeal, and the glass wall’s breathtaking views did nothing for him now. Maybe he’d misjudged her and it was indeed time to give up and respect her new life with Nathan. After all, she was right that he wouldn’t have known she was even on the island with her fiancé. Hell, she could have been married already and he wouldn’t have known, but she wasn’t, not yet, and that was all that mattered. He had to keep up faith that they could work out their relationship and he had a plan.
“Is that all that you wanted to say to me? I got the impression that there was more, you said it was something important!” said Candasee pointedly, noting Darius’ quiet and pensive silence. He was hurt by what she said just now but she had to keep up her appearances no matter what. She was moving on with her new life, with Nathan.
Taking a deep breath, before he spoke to make sure he had a strong voice, Darius paused before replying.
“Yes, I do have something else to talk to you about! My mother said she paid you a visit yesterday afternoon and left her calling card with your...ah... with Nathan. Did you receive it?”
“No. What card?”
He should have known that Nathan was the one behind her not responding to his mother’s request, Darius fumed silently.
“She left her contact card because she wanted to speak with you yesterday about something very important to her,” he replied aloud.
Darius turned and walked back toward Candasee again now that he felt he could control the emotions flitting across his face.
“Mom is having her engagement party tonight and she really wants you to come. She knew it would be late notice for you so she tried to contact you about it yesterday, hoping that you would’ve at least called her back!”
“Marianne is getting married? I am so happy for her! This is really good news!” exclaimed Candasee excitedly.
“Yes I’m really glad for her too, she deserves to find this much happiness after the hard life she’s had,” he said recalling his difficult childhood.
“It would be my pleasure to attend her party, Darius!” replied Candasee without hesitation, thinking warmly of the woman she considered her to be own mother, sensing relief as well at the change of subject.
“Good, I am glad to hear that. I’ve already arranged transport for the family and the dress is formal. I know you might not have come prepared for this and it would’ve come to you as a surprise, so I arranged to have some of the formal dresses you had while we were married transferred out of storage here for you to try on yesterday evening. Perhaps you can do that now before you leave.”
“You kept my formal dresses?” asked Candasee with a sharply arched brow registering her surprise.
“There are many things that would surprise you about what I’ve kept where you are concerned Candasee,” Darius replied with a low voice and a hint of tenderness.
“Apparently!” she replied trying once again to harden her senses against the gentleness and meaning hidden in his voice.
“They are over in the bedroom area and you can go in and try them on and determine which one you’d like to wear. Whichever you select, I will have it cleaned and returned in time for tonight so that you don’t have to worry about anything. I know that you will be busy most of the day at the intensive”.
Darius always showed such uncanny devotion and love to anything where his mother was concerned and that was one of his shining qualities. There was a saying that a man treats his wife like he treats his mother and somehow in the latter months of their marriage Candasee couldn’t comprehend the sudden disconnect. She’d experienced the extravagance which was showered on her as Darius’ wife, but it was his love for her that was the most powerful feeling she’d ever experienced in her life. So the fall from grace really hurt. Unable to harness her curiosity anymore, Candasee followed Darius over to the bedroom in his living quarters, and gasped at the huge pile of elegant gowns draped across the bed.
Darius followed her into the bedroom and witnessed her audible gasp as she noted just how many dresses she’d had.
“I always wondered why you left them behind when you left,” he whispered standing behind her in the doorway.
“I guess I didn’t want too many reminders of the life I was leaving behind me. Maybe I wanted to punish you a little too by wasting the money you’d invested in them!” she said harshly, fingering the fabric of a few pieces.
“Well it worked! There wasn’t a day I was in our closet without remembering how you looked, sounded and how you smelled, how you tasted many nights after we got home and let the parties continue,” he said meaningfully.
Darius had spent a small fortune on them and to her, leaving them behind, was like her slap in his face for his offensive insistence that she try to keep a certain look and status just to please him! Looking at the beautiful gowns now and how much she actually missed the feel of the cool silks and sheer fabric against her skin, she wondered what she’d been thinking to leave them behind! They were exquisite!
“It is obvious that we did a lot of socializing!” laughed Candasee nervously picking through the obscenely tall pile. “Okay I think I can remember a few favourites so this shouldn’t take me too long!”
“Feel free to take your time and browse, I’m not rushing you anywhere. In fact, I want you to stay a little longer so we can talk.”
“Talk about what?”
“Well for one, your life in Barbados and what else is new with you?” he hedged inwardly kicking himself again for avoiding the topic once again. Why couldn’t he just come ou
t and say what he wanted to say!
“I don’t think you would find that interesting!”
“Well I would and I do! Look around and find the dress you want and I can order in some coffee and breakfast. I was going to order for myself.”
“No don’t do that, Nathan is waiting for me downstairs, and this won’t take long! In fact, I think I see one of my favourites right now!
She quickly selected an emerald green sheath covered in tiny, shimmering crystals with a neckline that featured a sweetheart neckline and was held in place by tiny spaghetti straps.
“I don’t have the right shoes though Darius!” exclaimed Candasee.
“That is not a problem, I can ask Portia to find you something matching while you are the intensive today!”
“Thank you, but I may have to visit the spa to get my hair done for such a formal occasion. I can get myself a pair at one of the shops nearby then.
“Okay, fine!”
“So is that all?” she asked.
Darius walked to where she was standing and held her shoulders gently running his hands down the sides of her arms igniting an immediate rush of heat and current along her arms to her fingertips. Her traitorous body!
“Candasee...” he began turning her around to face him.
“I’m so sorry about what happened between us, you have to believe me!” he said.
Candasee could sense her bottom lip begin to tremble as her cool exterior began to unravel at Darius’ mere touch once again. For goodness sakes she thought, making love with Nathan should have changed this!
“I’ve spent so many days in regret, wishing I knew how to approach you again and to make this right. I never wanted to be apart from you! Are you telling me in the last two years that you never thought of me even once?”
“Darius, I did nothing else than think about you,” Candasee finally blurted pulling away as she recalled her frustration and walked around to the other side of the bed. “Do you think our separation was easy on me, that it didn’t practically kill me to walk away from you, from us? I did it because I had to. You forced me to leave my home and my family and try to rebuild my life. You are the one that betrayed me, not the other way around!”
“I know it was my fault and I admit to that right now. I should never have tried to control you like that. If I could go back I would never had done it but I was dealing with some deep issues and I let it creep into our marriage. I need a chance to tell you why I made such a huge mistake,” said Darius.
“I don’t think anything you say to me now could ever make a difference at this point. We are different people now with different lives. Besides I just can’t break up with Nathan because you finally apologized two years too late.”
“It’s never too late!”
“No, you are too late Darius!” said Candasee reluctantly. “We had a good marriage for a time and then you decided I wasn’t good enough for you. My life has moved on and so has yours, and I am sure that the women or woman in your life are thanking me right now for standing aside, especially one in particular.”
“Candasee, even if there were other women interested in me, it still wouldn’t matter because I have not managed to move past my feelings and desire for you. I sense that it is the same for you. Do you really think you are being honest with Nathan and yourself here?”
“I am not trying to be anything. I just want my life to finally move on past all the pain and the hurt you caused me! You know what? I think all of this friction between us is just the effect of seeing each other so suddenly and now a lot of old feelings are resurfacing that neither you nor I should confuse with being something real. What I have with Nathan is real, and it’s what I want, not a date with the ghost of my painful past,” she said.
Why was she insisting that nothing was between them when that couldn’t be further from the truth? Even she knew that she was lying as he watched how she avoided looking into his eyes as she spoke. She’d always prided herself on being able to speak honestly and look someone straight in the eyes as she spoke. Walking around the bed slowly, he advanced toward her. She looked behind her instinctively to see if she could get away from him but there was only the wall.
“Why aren’t you listening to me and why are you running from me?” asked Darius placing his palms on the wall behind her on either side of her head, trapping her in place.
“I am listening and perhaps you should listen to me too!” said Candasee with her voice now shaking. “I know you might have come up with many reasons as to why we should get back together but the past is already written and you can’t change that overnight!”
“Can you honestly tell me that being here with me right now has absolutely no effect on you? That if I was to kiss you right now, that you wouldn’t respond to me?” he responded ignoring her protests.
She had no words or defence to that question because although her mind was shouting no, every other traitorous cell in her body was screaming yes.
Darius brought his mouth within centimetres of hers and touched her lips lightly with his thumb rubbing it across them from side to side before resting his forehead lightly against hers.
Being cocooned with Darius like this was wreaking havoc on all her theories about her self-control. Needless to say, in a few short minutes it was in tatters. She didn’t want to push him away, so she didn’t. She wanted this more than her next breath; even if it meant that she had to swallow every word she’d just said. As their breaths mingled and their foreheads pressed together, it was as though their minds were becoming one again, and each was reaching out and searching for its other half.
God, he wanted to just clear the bed of that insane pile of dresses and just show this woman how much she was lying to herself if she thought for a moment that this was over. Her resistance both infuriated and magnetized him.
Finally, not holding back any longer he tasted her lower lip gently, then her upper lip, and she made a whimper from deep within her chest. But her hands remained limply at her sides. Her soft lips tasted like coconut cream as he finally discovered the flavour of the light gloss she wore. He felt like devouring her where she stood.
Darius smelled and tasted so good, so familiar and being here kissing him like this was like coming home to all she’d missed and longed for. Desire and heat began to radiate from her abdomen in rolling waves as her body longed for nothing more than to be one with this man, to finally satisfy the ache that lived in her heart for almost two years! Kissing him back required no debate, no struggle, it was her natural response, it was who she was, his wife, his lover.
Her arms instinctively came up around his neck as she opened her mouth wider to allow him deeper access. The flames of desire blazed up and around her like an inferno eclipsing all her previous thoughts. Darius wrapped his arms around her waist bringing her body flush against the lean hardness of his body as she clung to him. This kiss which began as a gentle exploration had now transformed into a wild, tangling of tongues and searching lips. Over and over they plundered each other and Candasee felt her panties become drenched as her arousal escalated. Her femininity clenched powerfully under the intense desire to have Darius inside her again and she orgasmed from just the thought. The tremors shook her body and Darius pulled her closer to him melding their bodies into one. Did she really just have an orgasm from just kissing this man?
Pulling away slightly and somewhat out of breath they both looked at each other as a knowing passed between them.
“Do you still believe it’s over between us?” asked Darius as he searched her eyes with his intently.
It was undeniable now; the connection that existed between them was there still undiluted by time, undiluted by the hurt and the pain! Hot tears began to slide down Candasee’s cheeks as she began to come to terms with all she was feeling but it was just too overwhelming!
She was acting like a schizophrenic. This was crazy! What was she doing? She had a fiancé for goodness sakes who she’d made love to just last night. She couldn’t
do this! She wasn’t a cheap slut! He might find it easy to betray Solange but she couldn’t.
“Darius, I have to go, everyone is expecting me, I can’t do this, I’m sorry. Tell your mother that I am looking forward to the celebration tonight,” she said disentangling herself from his arms forcibly. After steadying herself, she walked quickly across the room and out the door.
Darius stood his ground and watched her run again but made no attempt to stop her. She’d come apart in his arms. There was no way she could hide the scent or the way her body shook just now. She was afraid of the intensity of what still existed between them and there was no way she could possibly be in denial anymore. It was time for her to know the truth and tonight he would tell her everything.
Tonight wouldn’t be an ordinary night, because what Candasee didn’t know was that the engagement party would be held on a nearby private island Krispin, owned by one of his business partners Russell Thorne. She would be back among the family and friends she’d grown to love while she lived here. It was a start but the objective was still very clear, he had to begin to remind her of the life she once had with him and the real possibility of having it again.
As Candasee neared the restaurant for breakfast, the scents of eggs, bacon, pancakes and fruit all made for such an inviting aroma. She hoped that her eyes didn’t look too red and puffy anymore after the short stop she made to her room to change her panties and to disguise the fact that she’d been crying. She couldn’t even keep her promise to Nathan for one day and everything she did just cheapened everything they’d shared the night before. She wasn’t ready to get married if she was wavering like this.
One of the instructors at the buffet line pointed her toward the table Nathan reserved for them on the sunlit deck. He wasn’t alone but Eve Samaroo was sitting at the table and their heads were very close together as she listened closely to whatever Nathan was telling her. As she got closer to them he patted Eve’s shoulder reassuringly before she stood to leave. He looked up then and saw her approaching and for a moment he looked like a man with the world on his shoulders. His expression brightened slightly when he saw her. What was bothering him and what did it have to do with Eve?
Fighting Destiny Page 17
