“It certainly was.” There was no mistaking the underlying note of feeling in his voice, then, dismissing the subject, he walked towards her. “I’d better give you a helping hand up to bed, it’s time we got that foot bandaged and you settled down.”
“Yes, very well,” Jill agreed meekly, then added: “But how about a room, you’ve got Mrs. Miles and Mary now, Nana and Terry?...” She broke off.
“I’ve asked Nana to prepare my room for you—anyway, for to-night—to-morrow we’ll get things rearranged.” At Jill’s look of doubt he added quickly: “Oh, don’t worry about me, I’ll sleep down here in the chair, and for goodness sake don’t pretend that submitting me to a slight discomfort of that kind is going to afford you one moment’s concern.” A note of ironical laughter accompanied the words, and for the first time that evening Jill saw that loved twinkle in his eyes. Somehow it afforded her a deep sense of comfort as if, emerging from the shadows, she stood again in the full glory of the sun.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
As Jill turned restlessly on her pillow she tried to piece together the fragments of the dream which still haunted her ... her walk ... her accident... Brenda, too, had come into her dream ... A frown creased her forehead, it was a tangled series of events with a nightmare quality of fantasy. A sigh escaped her lips as she tried to return again to a blessed state of unconsciousness, but it was already too late. Sleep eluded her and slowly, reluctantly, she opened her eyes to the dim light of the winter’s morning. In a moment she was startled into full wakefulness ... she must have overslept … she’d be late for duty! She twisted over to see the clock which always stood on her bedside table, and at the sharp movement a stab of pain in her foot told her more surely than words that it had been neither dream nor nightmare, but stark reality. Supported on her elbows, she gazed round the unfamiliar room, lucid recollection came flooding back, and with it a strange sense of exaltation. Slowly she dwelt on each incident of the previous evening, there were details which still eluded her, but the important facts were imprinted on her mind. Easing herself into a sitting position Jill leaned back against the head of the bed, and concentrated on bringing some semblance of order to her chaotic thoughts. During her lonely walk she had fought against her love, had brought pride to her aid. Now in spite of the hope which Brenda had aroused within her, she must find no excuse to weaken. Her hands gripped the edges of the eiderdown, until the knuckles showed white. She mustn’t be foolish again, she told herself. At all costs she must smother the emotion which Duncan McRey had aroused within her.
Her eyes wandered round the room with its oak tallboy and an enormous oak chest; the only other piece of furniture was a table littered with pipes, a tobacco jar, numerous ashtrays, and a miscellany of other masculine objects. The door in the corner no doubt led to the bathroom of which Duncan McRey had told her, and the sound of splashing water coming from that direction told her that there must be another entrance from the landing. Her reflections were interrupted by a tap on the door, followed by Nana’s entrance, a tray balanced on one hand.
“Happy Christmas, Jill ... How are you feeling this morning?” There was a look of concern on her face as she set a morning tea tray beside Jill.
“The same to you, Nana!” Jill stretched up to embrace the older woman, then went on: “I feel fine; in fact I’m an awful fraud. My foot still hurts, but I’m sure I could hop around and I really ought to get back to work.”
“Such nonsense!” Nana clicked her tongue disapprovingly as she turned away to pull back the heavy brown curtains. “The mist has almost cleared, the sun might break through presently.”
Jill poured out her tea, then beckoned to her companion, tapping invitingly on the side of the bed. “Come and sit down here a moment. I’ve lots to ask you.”
“I mustn’t be long, I want to give Mrs. Miles a hand with the breakfast...” Nana protested doubtfully as she seated herself beside Jill.
“I feel awful staying here, I must be making a lot of extra work for Mrs. Miles—over Christmas, too! I really should go back to hospital, even if I can’t return to duty.”
“Don’t you worry about Mrs. Miles. She’s glad enough to do anything for you. She never stops talking of the way you looked after Mary; she won’t mind what she does. Besides, I’ll be only too glad to give her a hand. It’s a treat for me to be able to go into the kitchen without getting sour looks. I daren’t set my foot there at the Towers!”
“I know you wouldn’t complain about anything.” Jill squeezed Nana’s hand. “Now tell me about Terry. Is he very excited?”
“Excited!” Nana echoed. “The little rascal, awake at six o’clock and already rummaging in his stocking. I got really cross with him, tucked him down again and forbade him to touch a single thing until seven ... Then, what do you think? I go in at seven and there’s the doctor sitting on the edge of Terry’s bed, the two of them playing with the toys, like a couple of children! You would have laughed. It really was a funny sight to see the doctor eating oranges and pulling crackers as happy as you please.”
Jill could not help joining in Nana’s laughter. “Then he is better tempered this morning?” she ventured.
“Who ... the Doctor?” Nana asked wonderingly. “Oh, I see you mean about last night? Well, it was understandable, the poor man was worried to death, kept coming back here to see if you’d turned up, then rushing out to look for you. He was in a state! Nurse Malling was very good, too. If it hadn’t been for her fetching him, I don’t know what would have happened ... to think of you lying there helpless...”
“I’m all right now, anyway,” Jill assured her, “... and what’s more, I’m going to get up for breakfast, so be a dear and put all my things near the bed, so I don’t have too much hopping to do.”
“You won’t get up,” Nana retorted in the firm tones which Jill remembered so well from her nursery days. “You’ll stay where you are. I don’t know what the Doctor would say if I allowed you to move from that bed.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll deal with him!” Jill threw back the covers and lowered her foot gingerly to the floor. “I can’t take much weight on it yet,” she admitted, “but with a few hops and a stick I’ll manage all right, and I’m not going to be stuck up here on Christmas Day hearing you enjoy yourselves downstairs! Why, if I do that, I might just as well be warded at hospital.”
It didn’t take Jill long to win Nana round, and in a few moments she was helping her into her dress, now dried and pressed, and at Jill’s suggestion she produced a stout walking-stick from the hall-stand. With the help of the bannister and Nana’s arm Jill negotiated the stairs with comparative ease and entered the dining-room to Terry’s hilarious greeting. She wasn’t sorry that Duncan McRey had not as yet made his appearance. It gave her time to settle herself comfortably at the breakfast table, with her bandaged foot tucked well out of sight.
“Do we start breakfast or do we wait for Uncle Duncan?” Jill asked Terry.
“Well, most mornings he’s down first, but he’ll be late this morning, ‘cos you see he’s been playing wiv me,” Terry explained, gravely. “He came to play wiv my toys ‘cos he hadn’t anything in his stocking, and he woke terribly early ‘cos he slept in the chair. He didn’t have a proper bed ... it must have been most uncomfortable.”
“I expect it was,” Jill returned with equal gravity. “Did he tell you I had his room?”
“Oh, yes, he said that gentlemen always give up things to ladies.” Terry broke off, then obviously bored with the subject went on. “Can I have my breakfast, ‘cos you see I’ve such a lot of new toys and I want to play with Mary. It was the loveliest stocking, better than ever.”
There didn’t seem to Jill to be much wrong with Terry’s appetite now, and although he hardly stopped talking about his Christmas presents and all the excitements to come, he managed to eat a tremendous meal, and only gave up when he had obviously reached full capacity. “Can I get down now?” He wriggled from his chair and snuggled up against Jill. “Please come up and see a
ll my things when you’ve finished. Nana says your foot’s hurt, but I’ll help you up.”
“As soon as I can,” Jill promised, as she watched the sturdy little figure skip happily towards the door which Nana held open, then, as it closed behind them both, she sat back in her chair and a sigh of sheer contentment escaped her lips. What fun it was to breakfast like this with Terry; even at home she was never allowed that pleasure. Her mother was adamant about nursery meals for Terry, and all Jill could ever hope for was an occasional escape upstairs for nursery tea. The room still held that friendly atmosphere she had noticed before. She still didn’t know what had caused the transformation ... perhaps the bowl of Christmas roses on the table, or the tree ... It turned her thoughts to that tree in her ward. How excited her little patients would be this morning ... She should have been there; it was as much her duty to share their pleasures as their pain...
“Good morning! I believe we have already exchanged the compliments of the season.”
Duncan McRey’s entrance interrupted Jill’s train of thought. She greeted him with a smile and, leaning forward, pulled up the chair which Terry had vacated. “I hope you didn’t mind our starting breakfast, but Terry was so impatient to get back to his toys.”
“Not a bit, I’m glad you did. I’m afraid I’m late. I couldn’t get into my room to dress until you’d cleared out.” He smiled. “I hope you slept well?”
“Very well, thanks.” Jill’s cheeks dimpled. “I don’t think I’d better ask you that question!”
“Perhaps not.” He took the cup of coffee which Jill had poured and buttered a slice of toast. “I’ve got to go across to hospital and, by the way, Harriet and Fahr will be lunching here. Dick phoned me this morning. It seems that in the excitement of his engagement he actually missed his train! He had to spend the night at hospital.”
Jill found herself laughing. “That day bad to come, he couldn’t always catch it!”
For the next few minutes, while Duncan McRey finished his breakfast and Mrs. Miles cleared away, they spoke of desultory matters chiefly concerned with hospital affairs. When they again had the room to themselves, he helped her to an armchair, and when she was comfortably settled turned another towards the fire and, sitting back, proceeded to fill his pipe. “I mustn’t linger too long, but I couldn’t face anyone until I’ve had my first smoke of the day. I’d scarcely be civil.”
Jill smiled provocatively. “Does it make all that difference?”
“That depends—you haven’t seen me at my worst.” The soft, familiar burr appeared in his voice as he spoke.
“Oh...” Jill pursed her red lips, then with an unmistakable twinkle in her violet eyes, asked: “Not even last night?”
Duncan McRey threw back his head and laughed. The action surprised Jill, she couldn’t recall ever having seen him so relaxed. Suddenly his expression became serious and, as he leaned towards her, his eyes held hers. “I’m sorry ... you realize that I was deeply worried.”
Jill’s heart beat tumultuously against her ribs. What had she said? What had she made him say? A sense of panic assailed her, she was playing with fire again, making her heart vulnerable to that pain she believed she had banished for ever. With a supreme effort she adopted an air of unconcern and, forcing a laugh which sounded harsh in her own ears, answered: “Of course ... I quite understand and I owe you an apology—beside my thanks. I must have put you to infinite trouble.”
“Jill—why did you rush out like that? Why didn’t you come here to Harriet’s party ... what made you refuse?” His questions were spoken jerkily as if he were still suffering from the stress of the previous evening’s events.
No effort of Jill’s could stay the flush which mounted her cheeks; she might twist her answer, prevaricate, but that tell-tale colour was already betraying her. She lowered her eyes and murmured incoherently. “Brenda ... Nurse Malling rang Harriet to explain ... I ... I had already gone out.”
Although her eyes were still averted, Jill was aware of his rising, knew that he had seated himself on the arm of her chair, and that he was leaning towards her, his head only a few inches above her own. “Is that true?”
She felt his hand beneath her chin, and she was powerless to resist as he drew her gently round, tilting her face up to his. “No ... it’s not true. I did get Harriet’s invitation. I didn’t want to come ... that’s all.” She spoke with a note of defiance, but her eyes faltered beneath his gaze.
“Jill, was it...? No, it couldn’t have been...” There was a note of suppressed agitation in his voice as he went on. “Jill, you’ve got to tell me, did you resent Harriet’s engagement?”
“No ... Oh no, I’m so glad about her and Dick.” It was a tremendous relief to be able to answer with truth, and now her eyes could meet her companion’s unflinchingly.
“About Harriet and Dick, yes.” He echoed her words and softly caressed her hair. “You thought Harriet was engaged to me, didn’t you?”
Jill tried to pull herself away, but his hold was firm and there was no escape. Despair filled her heart, the despair of utter defeat and complete humiliation. The colour had receded from her cheeks now. “I ... I don’t know what I thought ... what does it matter?” Her tone was distraught, and with a wrench she pulled herself free from his hold.
“Jill darling...”
She felt his arm encircle her shoulder and draw her closer until her head rested against him. A shuddering sob shook her body, for the moment the comfort of his hold seemed all that mattered in the whole world.
“Jill, don’t you see I had to know ... I hated to ask you, but your answer meant so much to me. I’ve loved you for so long, but I had not the courage to hope ... far less to speak of it. I imagined you disliked me, then last night ... I began to wonder, dared to hope again. Jill, dearest heart...”
He tilted her face up to his and, with a sudden, almost brusque movement, his lips met hers in a long passionate kiss.
Jill had at first trembled beneath his touch. Then, as the sweet joy of contact flooded her whole being, she relaxed in his hold, her arms slipped up to his shoulders and her lips warmed to his as her pent-up emotions so long held in check found fulfilment in his close embrace. “Duncan ... Duncan!” She whispered his name lovingly, and her violet eyes sparkled with unshed tears of sheer joy. “How could you have ever guessed? ... How did you know?”
He gave a happy, almost boyish, laugh. “You remember Terry was the first to tell me, but I rather think that Nurse Malling contributed to my knowledge. She dropped a few hints which I was at first too dense to take. It isn’t easy to believe in miracles.” He dropped a light kiss on the white column of her neck where it emerged from the soft folds of her wool dress.
“But Brenda ... what could she have said?” Jill persisted in surprise.
“Enough for me to realize that if I let you leave Sunsand—probably never to see you again—I’d be the biggest fool this side of the ocean.”
For the next few minutes speech was forgotten and Jill, nestled closely in Duncan’s arms, knew that at last her dream had come true. It was she who gave a guilty start as the heavy bronze clock on the mantel struck the hour. Pulling herself free, she smoothed her rumpled hair. “You know you were due on the ward five minutes ago—you mustn’t be late. They’ve visiting hours this afternoon, and everything will get terribly behind.”
He gave an exaggerated sigh. “There speaks Sister Fernley!” he teased. “But I suppose you are right, I must get along.”
“I feel awful about being away now, just when we are so busy. It’s terribly hard on Nurse Malling. By the way, as they haven’t a Sister yet, I suppose she will act as deputy?”
“Although you were due to leave next week, Matron still hadn’t anyone in view, so Nurse Malling would have had to take over anyway for a time.”
Jill sat up, eagerly grasping his arm. “Duncan, listen. Couldn’t you persuade Matron to give her my job? ... you’ve only to say you approve and it’s as good as done,” Jill coaxed
.
“I’m not so sure that I do approve...” he began, but Jill interrupted his words by placing her finger gently across his lips.
“Of course you do!” she coaxed. Her cheeks dimpled provocatively, and her eyes were bright beneath their long, curled lashes. “Darling, it’s the very first favour I’ve ever asked you.”
“But Nurse Malling isn’t sufficiently experienced ... I’m not sure that she is entirely reliable,” Duncan demurred.
“Don’t be so fussy, give the girl a chance!” Jill rumpled his thick thatch of fair hair. “Go on, promise you’ll ask Matron,” she wheedled. “Besides, don’t forget that it was really through Brenda that you found the courage to propose to me.”
“I don’t remember proposing,” he reminded her with a grin. “I’m not even sure that I want to—nagging me already! But, by the way, we may as well discuss it,” he continued with an air of exaggerated unconcern. “Will you marry me? If so, when and where?” He brought her hand to his lips and kissed it tenderly.
“Are you going to talk to Matron about Brenda?” Jill persisted with an extra tug to his hair which brought a grimace of pain to his face.
“All right,” he conceded. “You win! ... But what about my question, how soon can you make it?”
Jill glowed with happiness when she thought of the joy in store for Brenda. “Unless you are prepared to face St. George’s and all the trimmings which go with it, it will have to be before Mother gets back!” Jill warned him with a laugh.
“St. George’s,” he echoed in tones of mock horror. “Not on your life! Anyway, why wait at all? ... I might change my mind!” His adoring smile belied his words, and as Jill gave herself up to the rapture of his embrace she knew that her cup of happiness was filled to overflowing.
The wind had risen and, from the distance, came the sound of high waves breaking against the jetty. The seagulls cawing loudly were flying inland, circling across the white cliffs, seeking the sunshine which had now broken through the mist.
To Please the Doctor Page 21
