by Harley Wylde
I shook my head. “I’m worried I’m not doing this right, that you’ll be disappointed.”
He cupped my cheek and lightly stroked my skin. “Sweetheart, you could never disappoint me. Try to shut out all your doubts and worries, block out the memories, and just feel. There’s no right or wrong way to do this.”
I quirked an eyebrow.
“Okay,” he amended. “So I guess if you slobbered all over me and your tongue went up my nose that wouldn’t be much of a turn-on, but stop worrying about whether you’re kissing me correctly. I can assure you, I have no complaints on your technique.”
My gaze dropped and my cheeks warmed when I saw the ridge of his cock straining against his jeans. No, it didn’t seem like he had any complaints at all. I fought back the fear that would normally surface, and slowly reached for him. I skimmed my fingers along his length, and Tex groaned, his eyes sliding shut. His jaw tensed and his body seemed strained, as if he was struggling not to react to my touch. It was… empowering. And a bit freeing. I’d touched him, on my own, and nothing bad had happened. He hadn’t lost control and forced himself on me. He hadn’t demanded that I do anything. I slid my hand up his abdomen, across his chest, and gripped his shoulder, pulling him closer again. This time, I was the one who kissed him.
I could feel him holding back, felt the tension in his muscles. Gripping one of his hands, I placed it on my waist. I knew there was more than just kissing, knew that he should touch me. Even if I wasn’t entirely certain I was ready yet, I knew I needed to try. I broke the kiss and focused on him, seeing the heat in his eyes. There was blatant desire etched on his face, and yet he hadn’t done anything but kiss me.
“You can touch me,” I said.
“Are you sure?”
I slowly nodded.
As he leaned forward to kiss me again, he tightened his hand at my waist before drawing back a little. His touch turned light and almost tentative. I wanted to assure him that I wouldn’t break, but I honestly wasn’t sure that was true. The way he was treating me, I wasn’t panicking. But if he became more forceful, I didn’t know what would happen.
Tex slowly moved his hand around to my back and pulled me a little closer and I felt his other hand under my breast. My heart beat a little faster, but I wasn’t afraid. If anything, his touch seemed to excite me. My nipples hardened against the cups of my bra, and a warmth started spreading through me. Tex used his thumb to lightly stroke the underside of my breast, making me tingle.
I’d never felt desire before, not really. When he’d kissed me, it had always been nice, and I’d felt like maybe I wanted more. But it had never been like this. Tex slowly explored my body, his touch remaining light, and I knew if I asked him to stop that he would. Deep down, I knew he was nothing like the men at Hillview, and maybe that’s what had given me the courage to even attempt something like this.
“You’re thinking again,” he murmured against my lips. “Just feel, Kalani.”
We kissed a while longer, his hands never straying below my waist, but tempting me to want more. I pushed him away and took a deep breath, trying to settle my nerves. My gaze fastened on his as I slowly removed my shirt and let it fall to the floor. I reached for his hand, and placed it over my breast. His gaze darkened and he lightly stroked me with his fingers. I knew in that moment that if I ever wanted things to go further, I’d have to prove to him that I could handle it. He might be an ex-soldier, might be a tough-as-nails biker, but he was also a tender and caring man who was afraid of hurting me.
I removed my bra, then stood and slid my pants and panties down my legs. Tex didn’t move. If anything, he seemed to be made of stone in that moment. I took his hand and led him to the bedroom. There was hope blazing in his eyes, but I could tell he was fighting himself. In any other circumstances, I’d bet he’d be the type to take charge, order me around, and just take what he wanted. But he didn’t want to scare me, so he stood there, immobile. It was sweet.
It took a few tugs on his shirt before he got the message and pulled it over his head. His body really was beautiful. Hardened from his time as a soldier. I lightly touched the metal tags hanging around his neck. I didn’t know why he still wore them if he was no longer a soldier, but I figured he had his reasons. I let my hand trail down his abdomen, and when my fingers brushed the top of his jeans, I popped the button free. Tex sucked in a breath, and I could feel the tension radiating off him, but I wasn’t stopping this time. The rasp of his zipper was loud in the otherwise quiet room, and I worked his jeans down his hips. Kneeling at his feet, I pulled off his boots, then finished removing his pants.
“Kalani…”
I looked up at him and the stark hunger on his face made my heart race. My hands trembled a little as I peeled his boxer briefs down his thighs. His cock popped free, long and hard. Tex had his hands fisted at his sides, and his chest heaved with every breath, like he was barely hanging on. I slowly reached out and wrapped my fingers around his shaft. It was soft and smooth, like silk over steel. It was amazing that something like this had caused me to be afraid for so very long. I still worried that having sex with Tex would hurt, but as gentle as he’d been with me, maybe it would be okay.
“Kalani… You don’t have to do this.”
“I want to,” I said. “But I don’t know what to do. Men always took whatever they wanted from me. I’ve never willingly participated before.”
“You can do whatever you want to me, sweetheart, and I can promise I’ll love it.”
I eyed his cock a moment, and decided if I was brave enough to have sex with Tex, then I was brave enough to do this too. I licked my lips and tightened my grip on his shaft, then leaned forward and wrapped my mouth around the head of his cock. Tex groaned and I glanced up to see his eyes shut tight, and his jaw clenched. I slowly took in more of him, my lips stretching wide around his shaft. I felt a flutter of panic for a moment, but squashed it. Tex wasn’t like the others. He was my husband, had been kind to me, and would never hurt me.
It took me a few minutes to figure out how to use my hand and my mouth together in order to give him pleasure. His body was wound so tight, I thought he might snap at any moment, but he just stood there, never reaching for me, never forcing his cock farther down my throat. I could taste the drops of pre-cum with every suck and lick.
“Kalani, I can’t… I … I need you to stop, please, baby.”
I pulled back and looked up at him, wondering if I’d done it wrong. He almost looked like he was in pain.
“Was that not right?” I asked.
He groaned. “Sweetheart, that was almost too damn good. I didn’t want to come in your mouth, and my control was close to breaking. Do you think you’d be okay with me giving you pleasure now?”
I stood and eyed the bed before crawling to the center of the big mattress and lying down. I flung my arms out to my sides and waited to see what Tex would do. He stood at the foot of the bed, just watching me for a moment, then reached for my ankles and eased my legs apart. My breath caught and my heart raced. Tex placed a knee on the bed between my splayed legs and then stopped. His hands tightened on my ankles before sliding up my legs in a gentle caress.
“If I do anything that scares you, say something and I’ll stop,” he said. “I want to make you feel good, but I don’t want you to be afraid of me.”
“I’m not,” I assured him.
Tex came closer, then braced his hands on either side of my body. His gaze locked on mine as he lowered his head and traced my nipple with his tongue. A strange sensation I’d never felt before seemed to travel from my nipple to the junction of my thighs. His lips closed around the rosy tip of my breast and he sucked, his tongue flicking against the hardened point.
“Oh, God!”
My hands seemed to move of their own volition, one landing on his shoulder, and the other threading through his hair and pressing him closer. Tex took his time, licking, sucking, tasting. Then he moved to the other breast and gave it the same treatment.
I felt warm and slick between my thighs, something that I hadn’t experienced before. Tex reached between our bodies and his fingers lightly stroked over the lips of my pussy. I gasped and arched against him as little sparks of pleasure shot through me.
His thumb pressed against my clit and rubbed back and forth. It was enough to make my body feel like it was taking off like a rocket, and I screamed out his name. His real name.
“Houston! Oh, God! Don’t stop, please don’t stop.”
He sucked harder on my breast as his thumb continued to rub. I felt one of his fingers start to ease inside me, and I tensed for a moment. He thrust his finger in and out of my pussy, then added a second one. The sensations became almost unbearable and soon I was screaming out his name again. He overwhelmed me with pleasure again and again, until I was growing hoarse. I lost track of how many times I felt like fireworks were exploding around me.
My body trembled as he drew away from me, his fingers slowly sliding out of me. Tex looked down at me with such need, such desire, that I knew I was ready for what came next. I wanted him. I wanted to know if everything else could feel as incredible as what he’d just done to me.
“We can stop now,” he said.
I shook my head. “Keep going. I want you. I want… I want to experience all of it, the way it should have been all this time. I wish you could have been my first.”
His body came down over mine and I felt his cock brush against my pussy. My breath caught, but he didn’t thrust hard and deep. Tex took his time, easing into me, and his gaze never leaving mine. I could feel his cock throbbing inside me, stretching me wide, but it didn’t hurt.
“I want to feel you come on my cock,” he said. “I’ve never taken anyone bare. Not even Janessa’s mom. You’ll be my first, and I want to be the first man to make you come like this. I’ve always worried about birth control before, but…”
I smiled a little. “It’s okay. You don’t have to tiptoe around what happened to me. And you’re the first man who’s made me come at all. I’ve never known pleasure until you.”
Heat flared in his eyes, then he lowered his head and claimed my lips. As his tongue tangled with mine, he began thrusting his cock in and out of me. Slowly at first, then faster. I wrapped my legs around his waist, and Tex slid a little deeper with every stroke. I could feel something building inside me again. Every time he slid deep, his pelvic bone brushed my clit and set off shockwaves of pleasure. Soon, he was nearly pounding me into the mattress, the last of his control gone. But I didn’t fear him, didn’t fear what was happening between us.
Tex reached between us and I felt his fingers stroke my clit. It only took a few swipes, and then I was screaming out his name again. He groaned and buried his face in my neck, his hips jerking against me, all sense of rhythm gone. He ground against me, and I felt a splash of warmth inside me.
His breath came out in pants and his skin was slicked with sweat. I ran my hand down his back and he pushed his hips tighter to mine.
“Did I hurt you?” he asked, looking at me.
“No.” I smiled softly. “That was wonderful.”
“So, it’s something you might want to do again?” he asked.
I leaned up and brushed my lips against his. “You can do that to me as often as you want.”
“Oh, sweet girl. You shouldn’t have said that. We may never leave this bed for the rest of our honeymoon.”
A warmth spread through me and I flushed at his words. “I don’t think I’d mind that at all.”
Tex smiled, and for the first time since I’d met him, he seemed genuinely happy. I had to admit, I felt happy myself. Now that I’d overcome my fear of being intimate with him, maybe we could have a real marriage, become a real family. I couldn’t think of anything I wanted more.
Chapter Seven
Tex
Two Weeks Later
I woke with Kalani pressed against my side, her hand on my chest. A smile lifted the corners of my lips as I thought about how insatiable she’d been after she’d overcome her fear. Being with Kalani was better than anything I’d ever experienced, and I hadn’t lacked for female company over the years. Not having to use a condom might have had a little to do with it, but I knew it was mostly because she was mine. She’d trusted me to keep her safe, trusted me not only with her emotions but her body, and I wouldn’t fail her. I’d never really thought about getting married before, but I didn’t regret making Kalani my wife.
My phone buzzed from the pocket of my jeans, and I eased out from under Kalani so I could answer it. Preferably before it woke her up. We were only supposed to be here a few days, but we’d ended up extending our stay. It had taken some convincing, because I hadn’t wanted to leave my daughter for so long, but Torch had assured me she was fine. And Janessa seemed excited to be around all the babies in the club. I had to admit that I’d loved every minute with my new wife, but I was missing my daughter.
I jerked the device from my jeans and stepped into the other room before I answered. Torch’s name flashed across my screen and my gut clenched. Had something happened to Janessa? Or had Hillview come for Kalani? Last time I talked to the Pres, he’d said everything was fine. The paperwork was still in limbo for making Janessa my daughter legally, but at least I had temporary custody. It didn’t mean something hadn’t gone wrong though.
“Torch,” I said as I answered the call.
“I know it’s still early there, but this couldn’t wait.”
The feeling of unease intensified. Then I heard him hand the phone off to someone else.
“How are things with the new wife?” Wire asked.
“Good. I think. Unless you’re about to tell me that shit has hit the fan.”
Wire chuckled. “Nothing quite that bad. Have you, um, slept together yet? I know that wasn’t a likely outcome of this trip with everything she’s been through. We’d honestly hoped that by extending your trip maybe she’d warm up to you a bit more.”
“Yeah, why?”
“Whitby has the cops looking for Kalani. It seems he’s done keeping her his dirty little secret. The news is saying that Kalani Whitby is disturbed and is dangerous. There’s a reward for her return to Hillview.”
I cursed and started pacing. “What the fuck, Wire? I thought you said he’d want to keep things quiet as long as possible. Why come forward now?”
“A social worker stopped by the morning after you left for Vegas. I didn’t want to mention it before, but something’s come up. They talked to Janessa, making sure her needs were met. The woman didn’t seem too thrilled that your daughter was hanging around a bunch of bikers, but I still had enough strings to pull that it wasn’t an issue. We explained you were getting married and on a short honeymoon, but she insisted on talking to your daughter and seemed satisfied that Janessa was all right. We’d thought that was the end of it.”
“And this has what to do with Kalani?” I asked.
“Janessa told the social worker about Kalani and how she’d been treated at Hillview. I think the state made an inquiry into Hillview after that visit, so now Whitby is scrambling to cover his tracks and seem like a concerned doctor and father.”
“But there’s nothing wrong with Kalani, except for the shit he put her through. He and his staff tortured her for her entire life. She was born because her mother was raped for fuck’s sake. Does he really think he can get her back?” I asked. “She’s not the insane one. He is.”
“He’s trying damn hard to get his hands on her and make Hillview look legit. The social worker came back to talk to Janessa again the other day, asking a lot of questions about Kalani. She’s concerned that what Whitby says may hold some truth, but she’s not one hundred percent in his corner. Janessa has told her what little she knows about Hillview, but Kalani kept her as sheltered as possible.”
“So what do we do?” I asked. “I can’t stay away forever, but I don’t want to risk Kalani being taken back to that nightmare of a place. And why the fuck does that have anything to
do with us sleeping together?”
“Because if she allowed you to touch her like that, then it means she’s starting to heal. It’s been a month since she’s been away from Hillview. I’m going to send you the name and address of a psychiatrist in Vegas. I know how Kalani feels about doctors, but you need to get her to talk to this person. We need an evaluation that we can show to prove she’s not crazy. I mean, I could manufacture one, or pay someone off,” Wire said.
“I’m not putting her through that shit. If she doesn’t want to see a doctor, she’s not going to. Anyone upsets her or makes her withdraw again, and I’ll fucking kill them. She’s made a lot of progress and I don’t want it to be derailed.”
“Torch and I have been talking. If you really don’t want to make her see a shrink, there’s another way to sort this out, but it means you and Kalani need to stay out of town a while longer.”
“I don’t like being away from Janessa for so long,” I said. “I already feel like a bad father taking this two-week honeymoon.”
“We can make arrangements for Janessa to meet you. Torch will smooth things over with social services. There’s a club in the panhandle, not too far from here, that’s helped us out before. Devil’s Boneyard. You were gone when we first talked to them, but their VP helped Venom’s old lady get to us safely. He’s also Bull’s father-in-law. I’ve already talked to Scratch and he said their club is willing to help your family. We can get Janessa to you once you’ve arrived and made contact with us,” Wire said. “I can have the jet ready to take you there in a few hours.”
“And Casper VanHorne is fine with us just commandeering his jet whenever we need it? Because from what I’ve heard of the man, that doesn’t sound likely,” I said.
Wire snorted. “He’s Isabella’s daddy. If she tells him we need his help, then he’ll help. If that means we need his jet for a few days, or weeks, then I’m sure it won’t be an issue.”
I could hear Torch and someone else talking in the background. It sounded like Wire covered the phone, and I heard more murmuring. I didn’t know what the fuck was going on, but I didn’t like it. At all. My family was in trouble and I wanted to fix the problem. But I couldn’t just leave Kalani with someone and head home to take care of Hillview and Whitby. She didn’t trust just anyone, and I needed her to feel safe. Yes, she’d improved a lot since we’d been in Vegas, but she was still healing.
