by J. K. Coi
“If I must walk alone, then so be it. My duty doesn’t change.”
“And how do you know that you’ve chosen the right side? That your duty is not misplaced?”
“At least I made a choice, and I will accept the consequences. Can you truly say the same, Cassiel? We fought side-by-side for so very long. Why have you turned your back on your obligations now? Why join with one such as Donato?”
Cassiel’s blank expression didn’t waver as he shook his head. “You misunderstand. Donato’s quest is to take the Fallen’s power for his own. He would kill your human and absorb Lucifer’s dark soul in order to rip open the doors to the angel realms and wreak terror on earth. That is not what we want, and we do not act with Donato.”
“If that’s true, you sure have a funny way of showing it. Just what do you want?”
“How can you ask me that after what you did? We only want freedom, Amelia. We want back what the Archangels took from us.”
“You fought by the Archangels’ side in the war just as I did. You believed in the necessity of their decision, in the wisdom of their experience, just as I did. It seems in rather poor taste to switch loyalties at the first sign of turmoil, don’t you think?” Amelia’s jaw tensed. “You know I can’t let you take Gabriel,” she repeated.
“Gabriel?” The angel lifted a brow with what might have been humor if not for the complete lack of any emotion in those eyes. “Ironic, is it not? That the soul of the Fallen shall be resurrected by a human carrying the name of the Archangel who died by his hand?”
Gabriel’s mind reeled with questions and denials. Hearing Amelia’s low sound of fury, he tightened his fingers on her shoulder to keep her from doing something stupid, but she shrugged off his touch and raised her arms. A brief glimmer of golden light enveloped her trembling hands and a shining sword materialized within her grasp.
Her spine stiffened. Gabriel felt her muscles tensing. She was too weak, he couldn’t let her fight this guy.
The smart-ass angel seemed to think so too. “Amelia, put your weapon away. Nobody else knows I’m here. If I wanted to fight you, you’d be surrounded and we would have had done with it already. Considering the state you’re in, you wouldn’t have stood a chance in hell.” He chuckled at his own choice of words, a hollow sound that fell flat because there was no soul behind it.
The angel glanced up at Gabriel, but his words were still directed at Amelia, “The human seems to care about you. Do you think he would cry for you if you fell? Do you think his feelings would turn to hate if he knew—”
That’s it. “Enough.” Gabriel pushed himself in front of Amelia, ignoring her attempt to hold him back. “Did you really just come here to flap your celestial mouth off, or is there a point to any of this cryptic bullshit?”
The angel’s already bland expression hardened into stone. “I’m here to help you,” he said to Amelia.
She laughed, obviously believing that about as much as Gabriel did. “And how do you think you’re going to help me?”
“Since I can’t convince you that your defense of the human is futile, then at least let my angel song heal you, give you a fighting chance.”
What was he talking about now? Could this guy fix whatever was wrong with her?
“And why would you do that?” she asked.
“Not because of him.” He nodded to Gabriel. “But perhaps I’ve spent too long in the human world myself and it has already weakened me. If you won’t return to the angel realms to heal, I respect you too much to let you go into this battle handicapped by pain and emotion. I find that I don’t want to see you massacred.”
Handicapped? Is that what had been going on? Was Amelia being weakened just by being here?
“And you think that’s what I’m heading for? A massacre?” Amelia kept her sword poised high between them, making it plain she didn’t trust Cassiel for a minute. “But if you heal me, how do you know I won’t use my restored strength to stop you?”
“You can’t.” Cassiel sounded absolutely certain. “There are too many variables already in motion and too many of us to fight, even for you. Eventually, the human must accede and Lucifer’s soul will unlock the angel realms.” He paused. “However, I have no doubt that you would be capable of removing Donato from the equation before the inevitable occurs. You can save the human race and our own a lot of needless suffering if you join us and help usher in Lucifer’s return the right way. It need not be a bloodbath.”
“Why should I believe anything you say?”
“You know it’s the truth. Donato’s escape from the angel realms has corrupted his objective, warped his spirit. He’s become tainted by these human emotions and now wants Lucifer’s power for improper purposes. You know as well as I do what will happen if he succeeds.” The angel sighed and lifted his gaze to meet Gabriel’s. “The human’s path is inevitable, Amelia. But you can ensure that the resulting destruction is minimal, that all of this will benefit our race, work for the greater good.”
So that was his game. The politics of angels. Cassiel wanted to get rid of the competition—Donato—but wasn’t man enough to do the deed himself.
It wasn’t quite what Gabriel would have suspected. In fact, none of this seemed real to him, and yet he couldn’t pretend it wasn’t. Amelia was truly sick. He thought maybe she was dying. As much as he hated it, if this guy could make her better…“All right, we accept your offer of help.”
Amelia turned to him in surprise. “We accept nothing.” Her voice carried a distinct bite that Gabriel ignored.
He looked at Cassiel. “You can really make her better?”
He nodded. “The effect won’t last long if she stays here, but yes.”
“Cassiel, get out of here now or I cut you down where you stand.”
“Amelia, don’t be stupid,” Gabriel stepped forward, forcing himself between her and the other angel. “If being here on earth to protect me is what’s made you sick and this asshole can help, then you have to let him.” Did you go to hell for calling an angel an asshole, even if the winged bastard was plotting to kill you?
“I’m fine,” she insisted.
God, the woman was so damn stubborn. Gabriel understood. He didn’t trust this guy either, but he couldn’t see that they had any other choice in the matter right now. Amelia was about to keel over. “You’re not fine, Amelia, and everyone knows it, including the ones you say are after us. If what this guy says is true and things are just going to get worse…” He paused. “I won’t be responsible for your death.”
She turned her face aside, but Gabriel saw what she wasn’t saying out loud. She doesn’t expect to get out of this alive anyway.
“Amelia.” His tone brooked no argument.
Finally she nodded and handed her sword to Gabriel. She glared at Cassiel, the look in her eyes clearly promising death if he betrayed them. “If he tries anything funny, cut his head off.”
“Will do. Trust me, I have no problem with that.” Gabriel wrapped one hand around the hilt. The damn thing weighed a fucking ton and he realized just how staggeringly strong Amelia must be, even in her weakened state. It was a hell of a turn-on—as if he needed another reason to want her.
Watching them both carefully, Cassiel waited with his arms crossed.
Amelia glanced back at Gabriel with a shuttered look on her face. Her voice lowered to a whisper, for his ears only. “Afterward, I—”
“Never mind that now.” He shook his head. Impatient fear for her life gnawed at him as he pushed her forward. God, he hoped this was the right thing to do. He didn’t trust this Cassiel for one minute, but Amelia didn’t seem to have a lot of other options and they were down to the wire. “Baby, you need to get well. We’ll worry about everything else later.”
She pressed the palm of her hand to his chest. Beneath her touch, his heart hammered away, but he tried to mask the depth of his feelings. Feelings he hadn’t even had a chance to reconcile, and which were definitely none of Cassiel’s business.
> “Go,” he murmured. Resting the tip of her sword in the worn, short-pile carpeting, he lifted her hand to his mouth and left a kiss in the middle of her palm. He gave her another little push. “Let this guy make you strong again so I don’t feel like a shit when it’s time to bust your ass for keeping so many secrets from me.”
The small smile faded from her face. Oh yes, he knew there were more secrets.
“Later,” he promised. He just hoped there would be time for later.
Chapter Eight
Amelia knelt at Cassiel’s feet, her beautiful wings spread wide behind her so they wouldn’t sweep the dirty floor. Gabriel remained at her back, holding her shining blade at the ready and watching Cassiel.
“As I said, I will do what I can for you because of our past association, but this won’t last, you know that,” the angel repeated. “You’ve stayed here much too long. To regain your full strength, you will have to—”
“Just do it.” She glared up at him.
Cassiel looked over Amelia’s shoulder, his expression revealing nothing. After a long moment he nodded. The angel pursed his lips, dropped his chin, closed his eyes.
Amelia paused before lowering her head as well. Gabriel put a hand on her shoulder, thankful when she didn’t shrug him off.
When the first, steady notes of Cassiel’s song filled the dingy hotel room, Gabriel let out a deep breath. Somehow, he’d known this was what Amelia needed. He remembered how powerful her voice had been when she sang to him, how it had washed over him, calming him, as if she’d magically lent him some of her strength. He hadn’t realized until now, but that’s exactly what she had done. The seductive, healing effect of her song had been more than just perceived, it had been a very real form of enchantment.
Amelia had used her gift to soothe him, but it occurred to Gabriel that such a power could also be used for less noble-minded purposes. Alarmed, he paid closer attention to Cassiel.
But maybe he was wrong. Already, her color looked ten times better. The lines of pain in her forehead and around her mouth had smoothed out and her hair gleamed with a healthy radiance. She looked more and more like the ethereal woman he remembered seeing when he’d opened his eyes for the first time in the hospital.
Cassiel was definitely healing her. At the same time Gabriel couldn’t let go of the feeling that more was going on than what he could see and hear. It was subtle but not imperceptible. Sneaky and dark, it slithered over his senses like oil on water. The angel’s song was working on Gabriel, too, but in a much different way.
He didn’t feel as he had when Amelia sang to him, healthier and calmer. He did feel something, though. Building within him, seeming to give him strength. But that wasn’t all. An energy. Insistent and sharp, digging its way into his soul, invading his brain. Tripping all his nerve endings as it moved into each corner of his body and mind, as if Cassiel were probing, calling. Trying to find something inside of him.
No. Trying to awaken something.
Gabriel shook his head, fighting against the persuasion he felt in the practiced rhythm of Cassiel’s voice. His grip on Amelia’s sword tightened.
Amelia wanted this, she did. She needed to do this.
Even so, as Cassiel’s angel song flooded her dying shell with renewed life and energy, she found herself holding back from it. Why? Where did the reluctance to submit come from?
But she knew. Part of her hadn’t wanted to let him anywhere near her with angel song. If he restored her strength as promised, it would mean letting him take her new emotions too. Letting him destroy the feelings Gabriel had brought out in her that she’d only begun to explore and returning her to the state she had been in before Gabriel had made her want to explore them.
His warm and solid, reassuring presence at her back wasn’t making the process any easier either. She found herself fighting the urge to jump to her feet and pull Gabriel out the door, to walk out on Cassiel, all the angels—Michael included—and the crushing weight of the responsibility she had carried for so long.
Instead, she curled her fingers into the hotel room’s dirty carpeting, forcing herself to remain still.
As Cassiel’s strength filled her, she caught a note of something else flowing beneath the familiar song. Gabriel’s hand fell on her shoulder. She felt the tension rising in him. Something else was going on here. Something she had overlooked.
Caught up in the force of Cassiel’s power, she couldn’t pinpoint what it was. She couldn’t concentrate on anything except for the compelling intensity of the song.
Slowly, finally, Amelia’s uncertainty faded. The familiar equanimity that had guided her existence returned, working quickly to rebuild the walls around her heart and soul. She welcomed it, her earlier reluctance gone.
Opening her eyes, she kept her head bowed. Cassiel had stopped singing, but it was a long moment before the room fell completely silent. As she got to her feet, she was conscious of a feeling of…emptiness. A few moments ago it would have bothered her, but she disregarded it now, focusing instead on an appraisal of her strengths and weaknesses.
She felt better physically, but it was immediately apparent that she wasn’t at her full strength. This was understandable considering how long she had been absent from the angel realms and how much energy she’d expended keeping Gabriel safe.
It would have to be enough.
“Are you okay?”
Some part of her paused, waiting to see if the deep timbre of Gabriel’s voice would make her feel anything. She turned to him. There was concern for her in his expression, but also something else. Strain. Fatigue. Tension. As if Cassiel’s song had done something to him too.
No. He couldn’t have. It couldn’t be that easy.
Swinging back around, she faced Cassiel in accusation. “What have you done to him?”
Deep lines pulled at the corners of the angel’s eyes and his breathing came in short, quick gasps.
Angel song could be as draining for the bestower as it was invigorating to the recipient. Within the protection of the angel realms that wouldn’t have been a problem, but Cassiel’s efforts on this plane had gone a long way toward putting him in the same position of crisis he had just rescued Amelia from.
He looked at her and smiled. A real smile that must have come from the emergence of some real emotion. Although from the foul tilt to his lips, she was certain any feelings he had were far from benevolent or nurturing. “Sweet Amelia. Didn’t I tell you already that your chore was a fruitless one, that our truth was the inevitability?” He laughed then, lifting his gaze to look at Gabriel over her shoulder. “Your unique human had quite an interesting reaction to my very special brand of angel song.”
“What did you do?” she repeated.
He shrugged. The motion seemed to cause him discomfort, and a sharp wince followed. “I simply awakened the human to his true nature. I decided to show him a little bit of what you would fight so hard to keep hidden from him.”
“It isn’t true,” she said, but inside she already knew. “You couldn’t have known how to…”
“I may not have known for certain, but it didn’t hurt to give it a try.” Cassiel grimaced. “It took a little more of my strength than I planned, but it helped that you were…otherwise occupied.”
“I should kill you.” Quickly, Amelia turned and grabbed her sword from Gabriel’s hands, but when she swung back to face Cassiel, the other angel had stepped back, out of the way.
“No, you won’t. You wouldn’t turn on me after I just saved your life?” He waved a finger at her as if to scold. “But now I’m certain all the rumors are true. It was you who killed Ezechiel, wasn’t it?”
Gabriel was at her side, looking from her to Cassiel and back. Amelia stood firm. “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said.
“I think I know enough to come to an educated conclusion.” He smirked, tipping his head in Gabriel’s direction. “And now, at least, he will know what to expect when his destiny catches up with him.
Why don’t you tell him who you really are, what he really is, and see what he thinks of your dedication to duty?”
Cassiel jeered at them both before he dipped low in a mock bow. “Welcome to the family, Gabe.”
With several heavy beats of his massive wings, Cassiel looked to the ceiling…
…and vanished.
Gabriel blinked against the bright flash of light that signaled the angel’s abrupt departure. When Cassiel was gone, Amelia lowered her weapon, replacing it in the scabbard that just appeared—handily—at her back.
She looked him up and down, checking for what, he didn’t know. “Are you all right?”
“I’m fine.”
She nodded and moved across the room to check the lock on the door. He remained where he was, watching her expression—no, that wasn’t right because she had no expression. Nothing showed in the face he had come to find so fascinating. Not concern or distress, softness or anger. None of the tenderness, warmth and passion he’d been certain of just an hour ago. Was she just hiding it from him, or was it really gone? Did she even remember what it had felt like? Could she?
The pieces of this enormously complicated puzzle were slowly coming together, and he didn’t like the picture it made.
“What the hell was all that?” He was determined to keep the pain out of his voice, determined that the angel who felt nothing would get no emotion from him. “Never mind, don’t answer. I’m tired of getting the runaround. Why don’t you let me tell you what I think I’ve come up with instead.”
Amelia simply went to the window and looked out into the pre-dawn light. A fleeting wisp of something crossed her reflection. If he didn’t know better, Gabriel would have said she looked wistful. With her back to him, his gaze was drawn to the soft, flawless beauty of her wings.
The magnitude of his situation hit him. God, he was standing in the same room as an angel. Amelia. His Amelia—he couldn’t stop thinking of her that way, although he knew he had to—she was an angel. Pure. Perfect. Utterly and completely untouchable.
